Start song: sunflower by rex orange county.

STUFF IS GONNA HAPPEN SO SOON IM SO EXCITED AND IM THE ONE WHO WRITES THIS

this is like 5k words long yikes

uh is commenting working?

*

After he'd come back from being in little space at school, there wasn't any panic for once.

He couldn't even bring himself to care enough about his regression to start crying or be too embarrassed. No matter how gross he felt he didn't want to even think about it. He didn't want to think about how weird it was or how wrong it was to want someone that he could call daddy either.

His brain was forcing him into this state whenever things got to be too much and Tyler was finally realizing he couldn't really do anything about it.

And Tyler knew that he had a lot on his plate, school work was piling up, his first basketball game was tomorrow and so was his first written essay of the semester. Not to mention his dad was still at home and his mom was at work more, which left his dad prodding him with questions the moment he walked through the front door.

He just wanted the week to be over, it felt like it would never end at this point.

Tyler would love to just stay home and fake being sick but he had everyone relying on him and he could legitimately feel the weight of everyone's expectations on his shoulders. There was the possibility of scouts coming to this game too which only made things worse.

Dallon picked him up in the morning for basketball practice, he looked tired, maybe exhausted and Brendon wasn't in the car but Ashley was which surprised him. She usually prefered to sleep in and get to school late.

He was feeling like a big boy today even though he couldn't stop thinking about what if's. What if he had a boyfriend? What if he had a caregiver? What if he made a move on Mr.Dun? What if he stopped regressing? but even though he wasn't feeling small (more-so upset.) He still felt so tiny especially when Ashley pressed kisses to his cheeks as she helped him climb into the back seats.

"How's my baby boy doing today?" She asked as she helped him buckle his seat belt. She'd be a great caregiver, any little would be lucky to have her. But he knew she wasn't really looking for that dynamic relationship wise.

Tyler's eyes brightened and then saddened as he pouted. He wasn't anyone's baby boy. "I'm no baby, i'm a man."

"Baby man? Now that doesn't sound right."

Tyler giggled and Dallon sighed because she was already sending him into little space and it hadn't even been 5 minutes yet. "Ash."

Her eyes widened in realization. "oh, sorry Ty. You're just too cute." She said honestly, kissing his cheek again only for Tyler to wipe at his skin.

Ashley didn't seem to notice and instead got on her phone. Tyler rested his head against the window, they passed by a few fast food chains until Ashley gasped and hit his arm.

"Oh I forgot to tell you guys that I want to shave my head."

"Are you okay?" Dallon asked immediately, chuckling from the drivers seat.

"Yeah." She smiled slightly, finger twirling around blue strands. "I'm just bored of this."

Tyler nodded and sat up right. "Maybe i'll shave my head too."

Ashley pouted and went to touch at his hair. "I like your fluffy hair though." Her fingers touched at his scalp.

"It makes me look childish." Tyler pouted, he'd always been insecure about his hair. It went hand in hand with all his other insecurities which all seemed to link up to his age regression.

Dallon laughed. "And being bald will make you look old, trust me. Keep your hair on your head."

"Maybe i'll dye it then." Tyler shrugged before bursting into gentle laughter.

"Get Mr.Dun to help you." Ashley laughed softly.

Tyler shifted uncomfortably, he'd forgotten that all his friends knew about his crush. No matter how much he trusted them he would never be 100% comfortable talking about relationships with them. "I-I don't know about that." He said honestly, only to sigh deeply. "I think i'm going to fail english so he'll probably end up hating me."

Dallon turned to look at him, eyebrows furrowed as his lips turned into a small frown. "Tyler, you're doing fine and you have him helping you after classes. You'll do great you idiot."

Tyler shrugged, Dallon was right and he knew it. He was just too stubborn to admit it. "I don't know, I just feel like I could do more to do better in his class."

Ashley smiled from beside him, not looking up from her phone. "Just do what I do, bullshit the whole thing. My best ideas come to me when I don't spend a week thinking about them."

He shook his head. "I can't do that though, it makes me feel unprepared."

"Don't stress yourself out, the days just started Ty." Dallon said as he pulled into the student parking lot. Tyler had barely realized they were even close to school.

Dallon parked as close as he could to the main entrance because the three of them were lazy and Tyler would probably complain about having to walk an extra minute.

As soon as they were parked and the keys were no longer stuck in the ignition Tyler kissed both of their cheeks and ran off to get changed for basketball practice.

*

Practice was rough, his coach was yelling the whole time, just as stressed as the rest of the team and Tyler wanted to just go home by the end of it. They had started off with drills and then the team was divided into two and had to play against each other.

This was their last practice before the big game and no matter how much they practiced nothing would ever prepare them to play against another group of boys.

Everything seemed to be going wrong today though, his team couldn't even make one good shot. They had no points and every time they took a break Tyler felt like pulling out his hair as he chugged down water.

How were they supposed to win tomorrow if neither of these fake teams could score on each other or if one half of the team was better than the other.

When they started playing again he went in harder, more adrenaline, he was getting so frustrated, almost mad. Everyone's form was wrong and Pete kept fooling around and kicking the basketball like they were playing soccer.

Tyler was ready to scream.

When the other team made another point he lost it and switched with Gabe who was sat on the bench even though he was the tallest guy on the team. Tyler didn't want to yell at anyone, he needed to set a good example.

He was still breathless once practice was finished and the whole team was yelling and cheering in excitement. Tyler didn't have it in him to cheer right now, how could he cheer when that had gone horribly wrong. He ended up taking a shower in the boys locker room.

He started thinking of the inevitable as soon as hot water hit his skin.

They were definitely going to lose tomorrow, his team was being careless and he was starting to think their recklessness would translate to the real game. He was going to fail he stupid essay too, disappoint Mr.Dun and then he'd be alone forever.

He really didn't want to be alone forever.

Tyler wanted a caregiver so badly, he wanted a daddy, he wanted rules and hugs and kisses and he wanted someone to spend time with and now he couldn't stop thinking about it. He just needed someone to ground him at this point, he needed more than just his age regression.

Having an actual dom was very different from having his friends take care of him. A relationship dynamic involving two people that were legitimately apart of the community and understood it was a different thing. Not that his friends didn't understand, no they were the most understanding people in the world but he just wanted his own daddy he'd never have to share with someone else.

He wanted a relationship so badly and he was upset that when he thought of a relationship that he thought of Mr.Dun.

It would never work, he had to be realistic.

Mr.Dun was straight and even if he wasn't Tyler doubted he'd ever like him or let alone
risk his job for him. It was illegal and between the two of them Tyler was the only one flirting. His teacher wasn't an idiot.

Which was why he'd started tearing up as he shut off the water and wrapped a towel around his waist.

Which was why he also started crying once he was fully dressed. He suddenly felt lonely and hopeless and sure internally he knew that he'd probably eventually find someone but right now he didn't have a caregiver and it sucked.

*

Between a really shitty morning practice with his team and a really sad time in the shower his mood was sour for the rest of the day, he was upset and maybe a little bit mad about the situation. Maybe a lot mad, that was the only emotion he seemed to feel right now.

Tyler had no problem in showing it off either. He had went from one extreme to another. Instead of being stuck in the headspace of a 7 year old he was more like an angsty 18 year old, which he liked. He was acting his age for once.

In class he actually spoke instead of quietly taking notes like he'd been doing since school had started. He talked to some of his friends, he'd consider them more as acquaintances but still he was able to strike up conversation even though he was being irritable.

He was being social for the first time in weeks and it felt good to reclaim whatever popularity he'd lost.

His shyness did come out when he passed Mr.Dun in the sea of students as he made his way to the cafeteria for lunch. He looked really good and Tyler felt warm as he stared at him for a moment. He wanted to just go up there and kiss him but he'd never be that ballsy.

Instead he made eye contact as he walked by and maybe he wasn't ballsy enough to kiss him but he winked at him with a smile and rushed away quickly so he wouldn't need to see his reaction.

Well that's what he'd wished he'd done anyways, he actually ended up winking at Jenna who was walking right behind Mr.Dun. He could've been making eye contact with either of them for all they knew.

Tyler didn't know what was going on with him today, he was just mad with pent up anger over things he couldn't change.

When he got to his lunch table he dramatically slammed his hand down on the table, getting Ashley, Dallon and Lynn's attention. Brendon wasn't at school today, Tyler still hadn't texted him.

"What's up with you?" Dallon asked in confusion as he continued eating.

Tyler shrugged lazily and slid in beside Ashley, setting a kiss on her cheek. "Too many things."

Dallon rolled his eyes as he popped open the tab of his can of soda. "You're so fucking weird sometimes."

"I just want to shoot some hoops right now and maybe cry." He sighed before perking up. "Oh, hey can I smoke with you guys tonight?"

Dallon's eyes widened in surprise, nearly choking on his food and he had to open and close his mouth a few times before he compiled an answer. Ashley was just as shocked, she didn't seem mad though because her and Lynn started laughing.

"That is such a bad idea," Dallon finally said, squinting at Tyler as he toyed with a plastic fork.

"Please." He begged, leaning forward across the lunch table.

"Are you being serious?" Ashley asked him, staring at him in disbelief.

"I have some pot brownies." Lynn smiled from beside Ashley. Tyler albeit having been friends with them for long had never tried pot, his friends were all huge stoners when he wasn't around and he had always been mad that he was never apart of it. They used to ask if he was interested in it but after he got in with the basketball team they realized that drugs probably weren't the best idea and decided to just not invite him over if they were going to be smoking.

"Babe we are not letting Tyler get high." Ashley groaned, flicking Lynn's cheek. Lynn didn't seem to mind.

Tyler sighed and went to start unpacking his lunch. "You guys aren't my parents." He shot, he didn't know why he was trying to pick an argument. It was a lie. They were more like his parents then his actual parents were. He felt guilty for even saying something like that.

Dallon's eyes were cold. "Sure feels like it sometimes."

Tyler nodded, swallowing deeply. He had asked for it.

"Don't be a dick." Ashley defended him.

"I'm not trying to be." Dallon sighed, clearly annoyed. "it's true though."

They all went silent for a moment, Tyler chewing at the inside of his cheek and avoiding eye contact. He wasn't going to continue this argument. Dallon wasn't wrong, he never seemed to be. He never seemed to be quiet about sensitive topics either. He'd struck something and Tyler wanted to cry.

There was more awkward silence before he got up. "I'll uh-see you guys later."

Ashley objected but he was already on his way to eat with Pete and the rest of the team.

*

He was back to being quiet in english class, only speaking to Jenna. Which wouldn't have been an issue if he'd actually been paying attention while Mr.Dun was talking.

He didn't get called out though, if anything he got a stern look which didn't shut him up for more than 5 minutes before he pulled his desk back beside Jenna's and started talking to her again.

She was just complaining about the cheer team and he was complaining about Dallon instead of doing the work that had been handed out.

Eventually Mr.Dun approached them both, at the sight of him Jenna hushed Tyler.

Mr.Dun leaned down beside their desks. "Get to work." He didn't look mad, more-so irritated.

"We will." Jenna answered.

Tyler stared at him. "S-sorry sir."

Mr.Dun waved him off with a shrug. "Are you still dropping by after class?" He whispered.

For a second Tyler just blinked, and then he remembered that yes he had asked for supplementary help after school today. He felt his stomach flourish with nerves. Why did he have to like someone so unattainable?

Tyler nodded, readjusting how he was sat nervously. "Uh-yes, of course. I almost forgot."

"Alright." He nodded, patting Tyler's shoulder as he got up. Tyler swallowed thickly and Jenna glanced at the two curiously before she pulled out a pencil.

He and Jenna actually ended up doing the work, she understood essay structure much better than him. Tyler could barely focus though, he kept glancing over at Mr.Dun.

It was hard not to stare at him. It was really difficult. She didn't know how things like this worked. He had never been in a relationship, he had barely even had a crush up until now. It was all so new to him and he barely understood his own feelings. Tyler couldn't even figure out why he was so drawn to his teacher of all people.

*

Ashley and Dallon weren't waiting for him by his locker like they usually did and it kind of broke Tyler's heart. He doubted it actually had to do with him but still he wanted to apologize for his small outburst from earlier. Him being in a weird mood was barely an apology and he only felt worse when he realized he hadn't even thanked them for yesterday.

He felt like a shitty friend. Which is something he never considered himself being up until now. Tyler had always been a great friend, he was always there when they needed him. For the past year he'd been a lot less available emotionally though and the realization hit as he made his way to see Mr.Dun.

"Hey Mr.Dun." Tyler said as he walked into the now empty class with his backpack on and sweater on his torso. He brought everything with him, it would be too much effort to go all the way back to his locker later.

"Welcome back." He smiled from his desk, pushing his chair around so he could address Tyler. Tyler nearly felt his knees give out at the sight of pearly white teeth. He was so perfect.

"No food this time?" He asked as casually as he could muster while he carefully shut the classroom door behind him and sat on the desk that was in front of his teachers.

He shrugged and rolled back closer to his own desk. "School just ended, otherwise there'd definitely be doughnuts on my desk right now." He paused, smiling. "You are free to bring your own food if you want to though."

Tyler frowned, kicking his feet. "I don't have a car."

"You have legs." He squinted at him, nearly laughing.

"Everything is so far away though."

His teacher grunted. "That is called being lazy."

"I'm just conserving my energy sir."

"Do you not walk home everyday?" He asked with raised eyebrows and crossed arms.

It could've just been an assumption but Tyler had a feeling it wasn't. Quietly he asked with red cheeks. "How would you know that?"

"I might've passed by you the other day." He muttered quietly, he seemed honest, maybe slightly embarrassed and Tyler nearly died right there thinking of seeing Mr.Dun in a context that wasn't at school again.

"Oh." Tyler blushed, heart fluttering, hands shaking lightly with nerves as he gulped, his eyes never leaving his teachers.

"Yeah." His teacher nodded breaking the eye contact, clearing his throat and the tension. "So-uh you want me to look over your outline a final time?"

Tyler furrowed his eyebrows for a second before he realized that was the whole reason he was staying at school late today. "Oh, yeah. It's in my bag."

He felt his teachers eyes on him as he bent over and grabbed his bag off of the floor, messily pulling out his binder in search for his outline.

"Here." He slid it across the desk.

Mr.Dun blinked for a moment, readjusting his glasses before thanking him as he pulled out a highlighter and pen and started reading it again. Tyler hadn't changed much but he added a few new examples for his arguments along with a newly written conclusion.

He chewed at his lip as he watched Mr.Dun circle some words and highlight some others while he skimmed through it. "You know I probably shouldn't be helping you this much." He hummed as he flipped another page over. "It's fine though, your success is important to me." He said, not looking up from Tyler's outline.

Tyler was glad, he didn't want him to see his blush. "You're a good teacher."

"You think so?" Mr.Dun looked up then and Tyler timidly looked at down at his lap for a moment.

"Yeah, I mean I don't feel like sleeping in your class. You aren't boring and you're more interesting than most teachers here."

He raised an eyebrow playfully. "Interesting as in?"

"You, uh-I, your whole." Tyler glanced him over, taking a deep breath as his eyes trailed over a sliver of his tattoo. "Your whole look."

Mr.Dun hummed happily and scooted closer to his desk. "Well thank you, this is my first real teaching job so it's cool to know that I don't suck at it."

"Your first?" Tyler asked curiously.

He continued. "I was a substitute for a while and before that I was a teacher's aid for 7 months."

Tyler smiled shyly. "Well i'm glad I was switched to your class, no offence to Mrs.Ryan but I hated her as a teacher."

Mr.Dun chuckled, smoothing a hand through his hair. "You're a good kid Tyler."

Tyler blushed shamelessly. "If you say so."

If his teacher noticed he wasn't going to point it out. Instead he pulled a chair over beside his desk and beckoned Tyler to sit down with him.

That got Tyler's heart beating and he could smell his cologne as he leaned in closer so he could see what he was trying to show him on the paper. He smelled like pine trees and Tyler loved it.

He kept accidentally brushing his shoulder against his and he was definitely sitting too close but it felt so nice to be with him and he hated that this was the only way they could viably 'hang out.'

Mr.Dun didn't have very much to say about his work this time, he was instead pointing out little details that Tyler hadn't even realized he added in. In under 15 minutes they were done and Tyler felt dread as he looked out the window and saw rain. The sky was dark and he would be soaked and cold by the time he got home.

He had known there was a storm coming in and he hadn't even bothered to bring an umbrella.

"Thank you so much for the help." He smiled shyly, gripping his essay.

"It's no problem, like I keep saying. It's a solid essay. When you write the whole thing in full tomorrow you should be just fine."

Tyler smiled as he collected all of his things and shoved them into his backpack. "Hopefully."

They both were getting ready to go home, all Tyler had was a thin sweater and his backpack. He sighed as he looked outside, this sucked.

Mr.Dun seemed to notice his small dilemma though. "Do you want a ride home Tyler?" He asked carefully as he slid on a nice dress coat that had been slung on-top of his chair.

Out of all the things he had expected to hear that was far from it. He didn't know what to say. He wanted to say yes, of course he did but he wasn't sure if Mr.Dun driving him home was a good idea. Wasn't that illegal somehow?

"I-uh, i-is that allowed?" He stuttered nervously, fingers pulling down his sleeves.

His teacher just nodded picking up his messenger bag. "It depends on the situation but under certain circumstances it is. I'll just need to alert the principle first but it should be okay."

"Are you sure you're okay with driving me?"

Mr.Dun smiled incredulously. "I'll be right back."

*

Tyler was nearly shaking as he followed Mr.Dun out of school to teachers parking. They were sharing an umbrella and Tyler's hand was gripping it right underneath his teachers. He could barely breathe, he was about to be in his car for the next 15 minutes. His heart was beating out of his chest.

This was rare, rules were strict about things like this. The stigma raised about student-teacher affairs ruining the possibilities of things like this ever happening. This was apparently an exception and Tyler was sure if he was less chicken he'd probably try and kiss him or something.

They were both being completely silent and Tyler was glad. He wasn't sure if he even knew how to speak anymore.

It was raining harder than before, Tyler could hear lighting and god he was so bad with storms. He usually cried to Brendon over the phone until it died down. He felt safe though and he felt even safer once they reached the car and the door was opened for him.

"Thank you." He said quietly, timidly as he climbed into the front seat.

"It's no problem." He smiled, shutting Tyler's door for him before running around the car to the drivers seat. His yellow hair was already sticking to his forehead from the short amount of time he was exposed to the weather.

"Are you alright?" He asked concerned.

Tyler nodded and Mr.Dun pulled out his key and stuck it in the ignition.

As soon as the engine started music started playing and the heat was on full blast. Tyler sighed contently, nervously lacing and unlacing his fingers together as they begun pulling out of the parking spot.

"I live near that tiny little taco bell near the mall." Tyler said quietly, resting his chin on the palm of his hand.

Mr.Dun nodded. "I think I know how to get there."

This was perfectly fine. Tyler looked around the car, it was nice, really nice. Pleather seats, clearly a new model. It was super clean except for a few loose cd cases set awkwardly between his seat and the console.

"Is this a death cab cd?" Tyler gasped as he pulled one of the cd's out from its hidden spot. He wasn't huge on music but he loved death cab for cutie with all of his heart.

Mr.Dun nodded. "Yeah, you like them?"

"Yeah I-" Tyler's phone started ringing, he sighed and his teacher simply shrugged. "One second."

It was his dad. He immediately felt anxious and he didn't want to answer but knowing his dad he'd probably keep calling until he picked up.

"Tyler where are you?" His dad asked immediately, Tyler was sure that his teacher could hear what he was saying.

"I-I told you I was getting extra help with some school work."

He heard a deep sigh. "You should be practicing for your game tomorrow."

Tyler groaned. "I already practiced today and it was fine." He had almost forgotten about their shitty practice. "And even if I wanted to practice it's pouring rain outside dad."

There wasn't an answer, Tyler was annoyed and he glanced at Mr.Dun who was too busy focusing on the road to stare back.

"Is mom home?" He asked after a few seconds, nervously chewing on his bottom lip.

"No."

Tyler rolled his eyes. "I'll be there in 5."

His dad ended the call and Tyler threw his phone into his bag and took a deep breath. Sending an apologetic smile at his teacher. He sent one right back and Tyler looked away, not sure how he could handle blushing right now.

They were stopped at a red light.

"That seemed......"

"Agressive." Tyler finished for him.

He smiled a little. "Maybe."

Tyler sighed. "My dad is- I-I just, haven't seen him in months and he just reappeared a few days ago."

"Reappeared?" He questioned. Tyler hadn't used the best choice of words, he shook his head and sat up properly.

"He's always travelling for work and now he's back for the next little while."

Mr.Dun nodded, taking a deep breath. Tyler wasn't necessarily sure what they were allowed to talk about but he didn't question when Josh asked. "Would you say you guys have a good relationship?"

"Uh." Tyler shook his head, definitely not. He wasn't really comfortable talking about this and wether or not Mr.Dun could tell was beyond him but that didn't stop Tyler from answering him quietly "No, I don't think we really have a relationship."

They went quiet again for a little bit until Mr.Dun sighed. "Parents can seriously lack communication with their kids sometimes."

No shit.

"Yeah." He whispered more to himself than to the other man in the vehicle. He felt that.
Communication wasn't a concept in his family.

"Do you have kids?" Tyler asked nervously, not sure if he was pushing boundaries or not.

He shook his head. "No." Mr.Dun continued. "I don't think i'll ever have kids."

"I don't think I want kids." Tyler said honestly. "I can't even take care of myself right."

His teacher looked at him apologetically. "You're still a kid Tyler, it's normal to not want children at your age."

Tyler wanted to explain why he didn't want kids, there were so many reasons that he just didn't think he was allowed to delve into right now. The more he though about being a father to a tiny little life stressed him out, this whole new being would depend on him for their entire life. He wouldn't want to subject a child to have him as a father.

"You're not much older than me." He snorted.

"That's true, but I am more mature than you."

Tyler pouted. "That is so not true."

"Pretty.... sure.....it is."

"No."

"Yes."

"Tyler."

He giggled childishly, he could feel himself slipping. "I'm super mature."

Mr.Dun's jaw clenched for a moment and he looked like he wanted to say something but he instead just sent a relaxed smile his way.
Tyler hadn't really looked away from him since he'd gotten in his car but his smile turned bashful as he stared at his lap.

Mr.Dun's attention was back on the road seconds later and Tyler was sad their conversation had ended so abruptly.

They were nearing the mall now and Mr.Dun slowed down as they approached a set of lights again. "Which way?"

Tyler's heart sunk, they were almost there. "Take a right."

Within 2 minutes Tyler was instructing him where to park and within 3 minutes Tyler had wished he'd given him directions for the long way home so he would get more time with him.

They were parked right in front of his house, his dads car was no longer in the driveway. Tyler wasn't sure if he'd been home at all but he must've if he'd called earlier. Tyler shrugged and made soft eye contact with his teacher.

"Thank you so much for the ride sir." Tyler said after a minute of him making sure he had all of his things.

Mr.Dun smiled. "Really it wasn't a problem."

Tyler didn't make a move to get out the car, his hand was on the handle and he was ready to expose himself to the harsh weather. He turned to Mr.Dun, placing his hand on the center console.

He never asked anyone to come to his games and even though he'd already mentioned this to his teacher before he wanted confirmation. "Will you be at the game tomorrow?" He asked shyly.

Mr.Dun laughed slightly, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel. "I said I'd be there didn't I?"

"Sorry, I just don't think anyone except for my friends are coming."

Mr.Dun seemed to think it over for a moment. "It's fine, i'll see you tomorrow then. I'll cheer you on from the bleachers."

Tyler nodded, hiding his excitement and swallowing his anxiety as he pushed the car door open. "Cool, Bye."

*

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

im finally not leaving you guys hanging for more than two weeks.

updates should be more frequent now!

I CANT WAIT TO START REFFERING TO JOSH AS JOSH AND NOT MR.Dun. it's so annoying w

this is super messy tho, i can't keep things organized at all