(I've been down and this song has been on repeat and it both makes me sob and have hope so I just thought I'd share one of my faves in case anyone else needed to hear it today - or anyday x I definitely did.) 

HI LOVELIES! 

Strange couple days as I've found a new job (or well kind of the same but in a different restaurant) and that means that as of friday (if our local lockdown gets lifted) I will be back to working! That's v scary because it'll be full time and my time for writing will decrease immensely which sucksssss!!!

So - I'm going to try and finish this book by the end of the week - CRYING.

There are only a couple of chapters left and honestly I've had a tough day or two and haven't been able to stop crying - for literally no reason (other than it could be because it's my time of the month woops) but writing this has really helped and I'm determined to finish this in the next four days. 

(Probs too much info but frankly I share everything with u guys so there you go - hormonal crying is normal and I do it frequently, woop woop x )

I l o ve you guys with all my heart. 

HERE WE GO!!

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CHAPTER 74

"So, werewolves are real."

"Yes."

"And Trent is the leader of a gang of them-"

"A pack, not a gang."

"Right, right. A pack, sorry... And we've been kidnapped by hunters? Which happens to not only include your ex-boyfriend and his friends but your father too?"

"Yep."

"And they want Trent dead."

"Apparently."

"And Cam wants him dead because he thinks that you're under a spell?"

"Which isn't true, we're soulmates."

"Right, soulmates. Because that's now real and so are witches?"

"Yes."

"And Mrs Grenway was one?"

"Yep... and she thought you might be one, just FYI."

Kristie lets out a snort at my response, her laughter making a grin spread on my lips as she sighs and leans back.

"Now that," she laughs, "Is something I really can't believe. Me? A witch?"

"She said it, not me," I shrug, "Maybe she just mistook the first letters in your aura."

Gasping dramatically, Kristie shoves me in response, our giggles starting again as we jab each other in the sides and stick our tongues out childishly. 

It had taken a while for me to explain everything that Kristie had been missing over the last couple of weeks - I'd opted to leave out the parts that may completely terrify her and the secrets of the pack, but overall I felt like I'd done a pretty good job in explaining things to her. 

"Honestly," she says, her face scrunching up, "I kind of feel like I just watched one of those rundowns from Glee."

Okay, maybe not so well then.

"Yeah, honestly I'm surprised that you listened to all of it," I comment, "I for sure thought that you'd at least tell me to shut up once during the whole thing." 

"I thought about it," she admits with a smile, her hands absentmindedly playing with her shoelaces, "But I figured that, after what I heard Cam saying and everything, there had to be an explanation as to what was going on and why everyone seems crazy. Out of everything your explanation at least ties it all together so there has to be some truth in it."

"Yeah," I agree softly, clearing my throat, "But I'm sorry you've gotten dragged into it, that never should have happened." 

Kristie tuts and waves her hand at me.

"Ah, it's fine," she assures me, a calmness to her voice, "Honestly, for a while I was starting to think that you were leaving me out of something or pushing me away - that's why I accepted Cole's offer to stay at the house so quickly."

She thought I was pushing her away?

"K, I'd never do that on purpose and I'm so sorry you felt like that. I just-"

"You don't have to explain," she interrupts, her warm eyes sparkling as she looks at me, "I totally get why you didn't tell me - it wasn't your secret to share and frankly I don't think I would have believed you anyway," she shrugs, "But it's nice to finally find out what I was missing and feel like you're not hiding anything from me anymore." 

My arms wrap around her automatically, the cotton of our shirts brushing together as we hold onto one another. 

The little bit of light in the darkness of it all.

She'd pretty much been that my entire life - or since I'd met her anyway.

"I'm glad you know," I mumble into her hair, the familiar strawberry scent comforting me the smallest bit, "Even if it is in the worst of situations."

"Yeah," she laughs, pulling away and surveying the cold and damp room that we're sitting in, "For a reveal party, this kind of sucked."

There's even more comfort in her sarcastic words and humourous tone that I know I can't find anywhere else. Kristie was the person in my life that, without even trying, could always make me feel better; could make me feel wanted, loved and accepted, no matter the situation. 

Sitting and talking to her about the new world that we'd never seen before made me feel like it was all real. 

Up until this point I'd been in a sort of daze, focusing on Trent and the pack and the situation that we had found ourselves in. In a way, it felt like a movie to me - like things were put on, acted or faked - like they were too good to be true and would eventually end. I was relishing in the feelings that I felt for Trent and this new love and I hadn't really come to terms with everything - I hadn't sat and thought about how this was going to change my life or how I was going to navigate my dreams and reality to fit this new one that Trent had caused - that this world had caused. 

Having Kristie talk about it in such a plain and simple way made me realise that I could do it - that I could have this life and still find a way to make it all work. This wasn't a dream that I was going to wake up and forget - this was my life and I could truly be a part of this world. I could have the life that I always wanted with Trent and the new family that had accepted me.

Even if I was completely out my depth and it worried me. 

"So, you have a soulmate," Kristie smirks, her words full of laughter but her eyes filled with longing, "What's that like?" 

"It's great," I reply lightly, with a grin, "It's..."

I pause, the words of 'perfect' and 'romantic' dying on my mouth and leaving a sour taste - it was all those things but it was more - so much more. 

I think of Trent; of his pinky interlocking with mine, his eyes watching me carefully as I come out of a bad dream, of his shaking shoulders and clenched fists as he tried to control his temper.

"It's terrifying," I state bluntly after a moment's hesitation, "It's like being completely see-through and having this person, that is the epitome of perfection to you, staring right into your soul and seeing every flaw that you have when all you want to do is hide them. 

"It's being terrified to have your own ambitions and wants because you don't know if they'll agree and you know that if they asked you to then you'd change them but deep down at your core you know that they would never do that and just want you to be happy, whether that's with them or not.

"It's not like finding the other half of you, it's finding a completely new you that's everything you've ever wanted but have been terrified to ever dream that you could be. It's having to admit your faults and mistakes so that you can make room for a happiness that you struggle to convince yourself you deserve. 

"It's waking up and knowing that there's someone in the world that would die for you and you physically couldn't go on without them but knowing that you'd have to because you'd owe it to them and the life you'd planned together to continue... But your world would just seem grey and empty if they weren't there."

I take in a shaking breath.

"It's the best feeling in the world and also the most terrifying because it makes you realise just how much you have to lose and how you'd do anything to keep it."

When I finish speaking, my own mind works over the words I have just said - the truth of them slapping me in the face and I almost can't believe that they've come out of my own mouth. 

But they did. 

And they were true. 

"Wow," Kristie whistles, brows raised and eyes unblinking, "That's... a lot." 

"Yeah," I breathe, "It is."

She studies me for a second, her lip working between her teeth as she circles her fingers around one another, forehead creased in thought.

"You've changed," she finally states, making me look at her in confusion, "A lot."

"Well, I mean learning about werewolves and witches will kind of do that to a person."

"No, I don't mean that," she cuts in with a roll of her eyes, "I mean you have changed. Your view on life, your output, your own person - you have changed. You've just admitted that it scares you and it's not all sunshine and roses, you haven't glossed over the bad bits or lied to yourself about them - that's something you never did with Matt."

 She intertwines her hand with my own, squeezing it as she grins at me, eyes glistening, "I've never seen you so strong and honest. I'm really proud of you."

Her words make my heart swell; the genuine happiness that she's showing almost seems to make it all worth it and I laugh internally when I feel almost grateful for this situation bringing us together. 

"Thanks, Kristie," I murmur, leaning into her and resting my head on her shoulder, "I maybe should have had this self strength moment before we were trapped in a rotting cell."

"Yeah, that would have probably helped," she chuckles as I feel her head lean onto mine, "Although, it did get me out of the Calculus test I had so silver linings." 

"Right," I chuckle, "We're trapped by my ex who might kill us, depending his mood, but at least if the teachers ask we have a good excuse." 

"Yeah," she snorts, "Maybe I shouldn't have been riling him up so much earlier now that I know he's literally capable of killing someone." 

Our laughter slowly drops out as the realisation seems to dawn on us - the severity of the situation that we're in. We'd always managed to try and stay positive - our motto being that 'if you don't laugh, you'll cry' but now it just seemed to be beyond the point of finding the good in this. 

We could literally die.

"You know, I don't think he could kill you," Kristie abruptly says, making me glance up at her, "Matt I mean. I'm not just trying to make you feel better but I don't think if it came down to it he could actually kill you, I think a part of him just wants to hold onto you - and that's totally in a terrible way, but I don't think he'd ever actually want to kill you. I think he believes that he can't survive without you." 

"And I believe he's insane," I retort back which makes her grin and nod her head. 

"Oh yeah, totally no denying that." 

Her words do stick though - as much as he'd hurt me, I did always believe that there was still good in him. Now, I didn't really believe that - I couldn't after what he had done to Andy. But, her words did provide a little bit of comfort, or hope at least that I wouldn't die in the basement of this lodge. 

I wasn't betting on it though. 

"Speaking of insane," Kristie says, taking me away from my thoughts, "Is that why you could see Trent's tattoo? Because you're his mate? Because I honestly thought I was going to have to check you in somewhere when you were telling me about it." 

Of course, she was thinking of that. 

"I actually..." I pause, "I don't know. I guess so, I never really asked him."

Kristie stares at me with a dumbfounded frown, "You've never asked him? Are you serious?"

It was definitely something I should have remembered to ask.

"I just forgot," I defend, my voice going up an octave, "I had other stuff going on."

With disappointed mumbles under her breath, she moves away from me and lies onto the ground, her chin pointed to the ceiling as she continues to ramble her dissatisfaction for me and my answers. 

"Just forgets... after I've been worrying... of course you forget." 

I can't help but grin at her scolding as I lean back onto the brick wall, letting my legs splay out as I try to get comfortable. We had been here for hours, or at least it felt like it, and I didn't know how long we were actually going to be stuck here - it could be hours, could be days. 

Cam hadn't said how long they were going to be gone for either. 

As far as I knew, no one had any idea where we were and without someone coming to find us or at least getting shown the way, it was most likely impossible that we'd ever be discovered. Not until my father wanted us to be. 

"Hey, Elle?" Kristie calls softly, her words almost hesitant. 

"Yeah?" I ask, looking over to her and taking in the way her hands are linked together and resting on her stomach. 

"Do you think I have a mate?"

I'm lost for words. So far, Kristie had found the humour in everything, she'd taken it all well and not once freaked out or told me I was insane. She'd acted like everything was fine but now...

Now I could see the thoughts in her head. 

She'd watched me get hurt, be broken down and invalidated so frequently that I'd believed it myself. She was the one who picked me up when I was at my worst and always looked out for me - I don't know what I would have done without her.

Now, I was more. I had become the person that Matt had never let me be, I'd gotten stronger, healthier, happier. I'd found the person I was meant to and they had changed my life for the better.

She'd been so hurt in the past - by her ex Lewis, by Tracey... she'd experienced heartbreak and the pains that go along with it. She'd had her fair share of disappointment and betrayal. 

And now she was wondering if she'd get the same fortune - if out there, there was someone that was made for her perfectly, the person in her life who would never do anything but love her unconditionally. 

Like I had found.

"I-I don't know," I answer honestly, not knowing what else to tell her, "I really don't know."

She seems to chew over my answer for a moment, her nose scrunched up as she goes over it in her head. Finally, she seems to come to terms with it, a sigh leaving her as her shoulders shimmy into the floor, getting rid of the disappointment. 

"You know what? Even if I don't have a supernatural one that can tell me as soon as I touch them, I think I'll still have one," she replies, a small smile on her lips, "I mean look at my parents - I've never seen anyone more in love than them and that's got nothing to do with werewolves or witches. That's just hard work and true love."

There she was - the positive outlook in everything. 

"You're right," I smile, fondly thinking of her parents and their gushing words, "They're definitely soulmates."

"Exactly," she nods before pausing, "Although, if there are any werewolves lurking about and looking for me then don't be afraid to give them my address. I'd definitely be interested in having a hot werewolf boyfriend."

"Or girlfriend," I chime in and she responds by clicking her fingers and pointing at me dramatically. 

"Exactly, or girlfriend." 

Suddenly, from outside, there's the sound of banging car doors and muffled shouting that seems to run into the house, interrupting our soft chatter.

"Can you hear that?" I gasp, scrambling to my feet, "Someones back." 

"Do you think it's Cam?" Kristie asks, getting up too and following me to the bars where we try both try to listen to what's happening, "Or someone else?"

"I think it's someone else," I whisper, trying to make out what's being said in amongst the raised voices and angry tones, "It doesn't sound like Cam or my father."

Above us, something smashes to the ground, the sound of it shattering seeming to shake the whole ceiling.

And then heavy footsteps follow. 

"They're coming down here," I whisper, pushing Kristie behind me as we stumble, my heart slamming in my chest, "Keep back." 

Her fingers curl around my elbow as my arm stretches out in front of her, my knees locking as I hold my breath, preparing for whoever is about to appear in front of us. 

Were they here to rescue us?

To kill us?

To take us?

When the footsteps stop and the figure walks in front of us, swinging the door open, the fear in my stomach unwinds and I roll my eyes. 

"Luke," I sigh, my muscles relaxing as he smirks at us, "Cannot say I've missed seeing you." 

Just like Matt, he doesn't seem to take the comment very well and his face turns into a scowl as he spits at the floor in front of us, a grunt his only verbal response.

"Careful," Kristie mumbles, "Don't know what you could catch off of that, fuckboy." 

I stifle the laugh, a cough breaking from my lips as I try to hide my amusement but Luke sees it, his rage only growing as he marches towards us and grabs onto our arms. 

"Please don't touch me," I whine, winking at Kristie, "I'd rather not die from-"

"Shut the fuck up."

As always, Luke was a man of few words; the words he did usually say were saved for charming women and making up excuses as to why he couldn't be with them, other than that - they were saved for insulting and swearing. 

Much like right now. 

"You know what?" Kristie chimes in, stumbling up the steps after him, wincing as her shin hits the concrete slab, "I think you're the most boring out of Matt's little posse, I always forget about you."

"Like the fifth Beatle!" I add, and both of us snap our fingers at each other with a nod of our heads as we make it to the top of the stairs. His growing agitation with us was obvious by his barely audible sounds of annoyance and the grumbling under his breath.

"Exactly like the fifth Beatle," Kristie grins before giving Luke a once over and then grimacing, "Maybe it's the hair? I mean you have had the same style for like three-"

Violently, Kristie and I are shoved through the now open doorway with a growl and we stumble into the room, our bodies hitting the furniture as we try to stay on our feet. 

"I said, shut the fuck up," Luke hisses from behind us, a finality to it that warns us not to argue.

I rub the sore spot on my arm as I rest against the side of the table that I was thrown into, leaning onto my elbows as I rise to my feet. 

"Yeesh," Kristie mumbles from beside me, throwing a wide-eyed look, "Whatever you do, don't insult his hair."

"A big mouth as always, Kennedy," Matt comments, bringing our attention to him and away from each other, "I really should have taped it shut earlier." 

"But then we would have missed out on our fun game of me trying to bite you," Kristie pouts, brushing off her legs and I can't help but find the smallest bit of satisfaction in imagining her trying to nip him like a dog, "You always spoil the fun, Daley."

Matt responds by lifting his middle finger, turning back to the window he was looking out of before as he types furiously on his mobile. His thumb is in his mouth and his teeth bite at the nail, his foot tapping anxiously on the wood below him.

"So, what's got you so freaked out?" I ask innocently, taking in the way his eyes keep darting to whatever is in front of him. 

He doesn't reply to me, his focus staying on the device in his hands and his view of the outdoors that he seemed to be glued to as if it was his only escape.

"Apparently, little Tracey had a change of heart and it's caused a couple of issues for us," a vomit-inducing voice says, entering from a doorway behind us, a large bag in his hand, "I'd say I don't know why but we all know that you can be pretty convincing with that body of yours."

With his signature wink, I want to throw up, watching the way his eyes rake over my figure at his words and as his tongue darts out to wet his lips, I want nothing more than to cut it off. 

"Always a pleasure, Carter," I say snidely, pushing down the disgust I feel to focus instead on what he said in the hopes he stops watching me like a starving man would a piece of bread, , "What exactly has Tracey done?" 

Carter's jaw clenches at my words as he shoves past me, throwing the duffle bag he's carrying onto the table and it clangs as it hits it. I step back from him automatically, not wanting to be any closer to him than I was forced to be. 

I don't think opposite ends of the planet would be far enough away.

Out of all the boys, he still looks the most like himself - his slicked back hair is still perfectly in place and he's the only one to be clean-shaven. Of course, he still looked polished - it fitted him and his slimeball personality. 

"Well, while Luke and I were trying to catch up to her car to bring her back here for a little..." he glances over to Matt, "talk, we were interrupted by these things that came out of nowhere and protected her, so we had to turn back."

My heart stops.

Things.

"You mean werewolves," I correct, my lips already twitching with excitement, "Werewolves came out and stopped you, didn't they?"

Carter's glower deepens at my, clearly correct, assumption and he continues to unpack the bag in front of him, "They were in their human form but yes, it was those disgusting things."

My mind begins to race; Tracey was with werewolves, but which ones? Could it honestly be the pack and Trent?

What other wolves were near here?

"How did they even know where she was?" Luke asks Matt under his breath, crossing the room, "I thought you said you were listening to her phone-"

"I was!" Matt snaps back, his voice a bubbling volcano of emotions, "She didn't make a single call from her phone, I would have known."

Her phone.

I look over to Kristie in astonishment, the parts all clicking together as I try to nod my head and get her to understand what I'm thinking, but she just frowns at me and shakes hers in return. 

'My phone' I mouth, for the third time, pointing to Matt and Luke, their backs facing us, 'She used my phone'.

If I was right then it means that Tracey could be with Trent right now - he could be coming for us.

He could be coming for me.

Kristie still looks confused but it quickly changes to panic as a hand latches onto my arm and spins me around, knocking me against a broad chest and cutting off my charade like explanation.

"What are you saying," Carter seethes, his eyes full of suspicion as his breath hits my face.

"N-Nothing," I stutter out, the feeling of his fingers on my skin and the stench from his mouth bringing back the memories of the last time he had touched me. 

It was something I'd rather forget. 

His greens eyes are like slime as they slide down to my chest, focusing on where our bodies are flush against each other and I know that he's also thinking about the same thing.

"I wouldn't get your hopes up on getting out of here," Carter muses, his finger trailing down my cheek and I try to jerk away from his touch but I'm stuck like a fly in a spiderweb, his arm locked behind my back, "I don't think you'll be getting rescued quite as soon as you think, we're still going to have plenty of time together." 

I can see the pictures in his eyes; the intentions that he has with me and the underlying promise of what he wants - it makes my stomach churn and my anger boil. 

He wasn't going to touch me.

I spit at him, watching as it hits his cheek with almost perfect aim, causing him to pull back and release me from his grasp. His hand wipes his skin and his jaw tightens as he flicks it off, his glare narrowing while my chest rises and falls rapidly.

"You can't beat werewolves," I state smugly, looking over to Matt whose watching me over his shoulder, listening in, "Especially Trent."

Matt scoffs at my words and turns away from me, waving his hand at Carter and Luke as he continues to stare outside. 

"I think you'll find we can." 

My confusion at his confidence soon turns to horror as Carter begins to pull something out of the duffle bag, the unmistakable sound of metal halting any more words that are hoping to come out of my mouth. 

"We're not exactly defenseless," Carter hums happily, turning to show me the full extent of the weapon in his hands. 

It's a large dagger, the engravings on it beautiful and ancient looking but the weapon looks deadly - like it was made for killing monsters. 

Werewolves. 

"One bigger than average knife for a supernatural beast?" Kristie laughs uneasily, stepping up beside me, "I think you might need a little more than that." 

I know that she's trying to psych them out, to make then weary of their actions and what they're planning on doing but by the hard look in Carter's eyes, I know that there's no convincing him.

"I'm so glad you said that," Carter sighs, pulling a small pouch out from the bag that he stands over, "We also have some of this." 

As he holds up the item, the breath gets knocked out of my lungs, my figure keeling over like someone has punched me straight in the gut. My blood runs cold and I hear alarm bells beginning to ring in my ears - it seems the more I panic, the more Carter seems to grin. 

"And what is that?" Kristie asks unbothered, "Holy water?" 

She snorts a laugh and looks at me for support, expecting me to smile or join in with her demeaning tactic, but my mind has gone numb, my words stuck in my throat and her grin drops when she sees my expression. 

"No," I whisper shakily, my eyes unable to move from the glistening vial, the slight yellow tinge to it like a warning label that squeezes the last drops of hope from my soul.

Carter's grin is wicked. 

"It's wolfsbane."

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Yeah, safe to say I'm literally screaming at these chapters and I already know you guys are going to be too.

Don't hate me i love u all xxxx