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Gods & Monsters
chapter four

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CHAPTER FOUR
Sfortunata

THE AIR felt thick. Rough fingers caressed the underside of her arm, blue eyes glued to the torn skin. The medicine was cold to the touch and burned ever so slightly as it was rubbed in. A sharp hiss whistled through her teeth. A grin, so small yet so impactful, surfaced across his face. Eyes flickered up to meet hers. "Sorry," he whispered, breathlessly. She blinked, brows furrowed, lips stretched into a grimace. Her eyes flickered between his and his hands.

          "It's okay," she replied, blinking back irritated tears. He returned his gaze to her injury. It glistened under the oily medication, under the soft light of the office. The door was closed, muffling the sounds from beyond the wooden divider. She could only vaguely hear pots and pans, and utensils scraping against one another. She could vaguely hear the conversations, wordless but there. Another hiss left her parted lips.

          A single tear spilled over her round cheek. Carmen stood back, taking hold of the roll of paper towels. He ripped off two pieces, extending one to the girl. Her face flushed, bottom lip bitten between her teeth. She took it shyly, using it to wipe at her eyes. "I just have to wrap it now. Think you can handle it?" She scoffed, crumpling the paper towel between her fingers. Her sparkling eyes met his, his face illuminated by the yellow light of his desk lamp. "I'm not a cry baby," she told him. "It just hurts, okay?"

          "Looks like it," he replied. After wiping his hand clean on the paper towel, he let it drop in the wastebasket by his feet. "How did it even happen?" He reached for the roll of gauze and the tape. She exhaled, muscles relaxing. She slouched slightly, resting her weight on her opposite arm. "I was trying to finish buttoning up my shirt and I guess I forgot to tie my shoe or something, or maybe I just tripped on nothing. I don't know, but I tripped and fell down the last few steps and crushed my arm underneath me. And..." She bit down on her lip. Warmth flushed beneath her skin in heavy waves.

          Carmen waited, quietly. He took in the tremble of her bottom lip, of the water collecting on her lower lash line. He took in the color flooding her face, the embarrassment that puckered between her brows. "Sorry. But, uh, I fell and I didn't even feel it at first. I didn't even really notice it had started bleeding until I was halfway here. And I felt so embarrassed." He fought the urge to reach between them and catch the tears trickling down her face.

          His chest tightened with sympathy. "I really don't cry this easily, usually. Today's just... really kicking me in the ass. You know?" His head nodded slightly. Gentle fingers took her arm once more, the other hand pressing the warm gauze to her skin. "Hold this for me?" Her fingers brushed his as she took his spot over the gauze. With it secure, he withdrew his hand and began ripping off a piece of tape. "You're not allergic to tape or anything, right? Adhesives and all that shit?"

          A laugh rushed past her lips. "No," she replied, laughter still bubbling inside of her. "No, you're good." He smiled back at her, pleased with her reaction. Now with a piece torn, he began taping the gauze to her skin. "Next time you're late, you should just text me," he said, turning the conversation away from her injury. Perhaps then she could stop tearing up and ripping his heart to shred right in front of him. Her lips pulled back into a subtle smile. "I would if I had your number," she replied.

          He picked his head up with a subtle raise of his brows. "You don't have it?" he acted surprised. She shook her head with a finality that had him smiling. "That's weird, 'cause, uh, I distinctly remember giving it to you," he explained. Her own brows shot upward. Her lips parted, showing off her almost perfect teeth. He couldn't help but find the gap in her teeth cute. "No, I definitely remember giving it to you."

          "Yeah, no," she argued with a bright laugh. "No, you definitely didn't." He snorted a breathy chuckle. The last strip of tape secured the gauze to her skin. Fingers lingered against her skin, forming goosebumps down her arm. "Huh." She rolled her eyes playfully. "Huh," she echoed, mocking the tone of his voice. Carmen shook his head at the girl.

          The tension thickened. It felt heavy in their lungs. Miyeon exhaled a gentle sigh, her eyes flickering from his ice blue irises to his lips. He looked so pretty with a smile. "Thank you, Carmen," she whispered. A shudder escalated up his spine at the sound of his name rolling from her tongue. Her head tilted slightly, eyes fluttering between his and his mouth.

          His tongue felt dry. "You can call me Carmy," he told her. Her nose scrunched slightly. She had thought about it. Everyone else seemed to call him that, much like how they called her Mimi. But he didn't. No, Carmen enjoyed saying her name. Every time. "I'll keep that in mind," she replied with a hint of a giggle.

          They were so close. He could smell her perfume, the toothpaste she had used. He could feel her warmth radiating in waves. His chest felt tighter, warmth blossoming in his gut. His head lowered, and he swore that he almost felt her breath hit his face. The silence surrounded them like a blanket. Miyeon could sit there forever, listening to him breathing. "Why did Fak call you Bear?" she asked the one question she had been stewing with for the last week and a half.

          Carmen cleared his throat. He rubbed a hand over his face, his face dropping to a look of dejection. Confusion washed over her features. "Carmen?" Her voice was barely above a whisper. He pulled away, straightening his posture and finally letting his hand fall to his side. He ran a hand through his mop of curls. "I gotta check on everyone," he told her, clearing his throat. She sat there, paralyzed. "You good? It isn't too tight?"

          "I'm good," she replied. He nodded. He couldn't meet her eyes. "Are you--" A hand raised toward her and her words died in her throat. Carmen sighed with a slight shake of his head. "If it hurts too bad, let me know, okay?" She nodded. That seemed to be enough for him to finally close the conversation. He didn't spare her a look, moving fast out of the office. Miyeon frowned. It appeared that maybe she had struck a nerve. She only hoped that it didn't worsen his already shit day.

୧ ‧₊˚ 🍮 ⋅ ☆

Miyeon felt like she cleaned more than she actually worked sometimes, and now with the C grade, it felt like she was doubling down on it. Which is why she was currently in the front, wiping down the windows like her life depended on it.

Carmen paused behind her, lips pressed into a tight line. He wanted to apologize for running out on her earlier. He felt like an asshole, and he felt like she thought he was an asshole. She had every right to think that way, but he also hoped she didn't. "Jesus," Miyeon whispered, climbing up onto the stool by the window bar to reach a particularly high spot.

"Need help?" he suddenly asked. The legs of the stool scraped against the floor. She turned swiftly, barely catching herself before she could slide off of the seat. "Jesus Christ!" she exclaimed in surprise, wide eyes finding Carmen standing there. He exhaled a chuckle. "Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you."

He held the paper in his grasp tight. "Is that corner of the window clean?" he asked. Her eyes followed the line of his finger. "Yeah," she replied. "Dry, too." He nodded, lips pressed in a soft line. She sat down on the stool, exhaling a hefty sigh. She really wished he didn't have to put that up. It was a stain on their already tarnished building. Only this one was more public, and people cared about it more than a few chipped plates and sweaty floors.

But he had to do it. By law. She spun around on the stool, setting the rag down onto the bar. "I can stay late tonight," she offered, toes tapping against the linoleum flooring. Carmen snorted, taping the paper up. "I'm serious. We could get some major cleaning done." He glanced toward her, blue eyes soft. She matched his gaze, challenging him to say no. He didn't really have much of a choice, anyway.

"I have nowhere else to be," she explained. "And this place needs the attention. Proof is in the window." Fuck, he thought. She had a point. A very valid point. And that small voice in his head told him to accept. It gave him more time to be with her; more time to be around her. He could finally get to know her properly. But he couldn't. He wasn't sure he could stand in the same space as her for too long. "I can't pay you," he reminded her.

Her shoulders lifted in a half shrug. "I'm not asking you to," she retorted. She wore a playful grin before spinning once more on the red vinyl. Carmen's lips parted, disbelief sparkling behind his baby blues. Before he could respond, a gentle knock on the window tore his attention away from the dark haired girl. The two glanced toward the person outside.

While Miyeon didn't recognize him, a soft curse slipped past her boss' lips. A hand ran through his hair as he smiled politely at the older gentleman. He waved him inside, chancing a glance toward the brunette. "Do you mind giving us some privacy for a bit?" he asked. "I just gotta talk to him."

She nodded her head. The bells jingled from overhead as the stranger entered the building. "Carm," he greeted the curly haired boy affectionately. Carmen grinned ever so slightly. "Uncle Jimmy," he replied, accepting the man's outstretched hand. "Who's this?" Miyeon's eyes widened upon meeting the man's eyes.

Carmen silently cursed in his head. "She's our new head of house. Miyeon." She approached shyly, extending her hand to the gentleman. "Hi, it is so nice to meet you." He smiled back at the brunette. "You, too, honey," he replied. Two hands captured hers, his head bowing politely. "You are so beautiful. What are you doing working in a dump like this?" he asked. A slight laugh slipped past her lips.

"It's not so bad," she replied, earnestly. "Would you guys like a drink before I head to the back? It's on me." Jimmy looked impressed with the young girl. He glanced toward Carmen with lifted brows. The curly haired man shook his head. "No, that's okay, Miyeon. Thank you."

"Now, hold on. I'd love a glass of water," Jimmy spoke up. He turned back to the brunette with a closed lip smile. "Thank you." She nodded her head, showing off that bright smile that had customers returning. Carmen knew that his food was good. He knew that it could speak for itself, but he also knew that the reality was that people were coming back for her. Her beauty and her personality outshined everything else in The Original Beef by miles. And he didn't mind too much. In reality, he was grateful for her. "You sure you don't want anything?"

Carmen blinked. "A water is good," he replied. "Thank you." She nodded with finality, snapping her fingers at her sides. "Alright. I will be right back. The tables are clean, so you can sit literally anywhere." Carmen's eyes widened slightly. Her heart stopped beating for a split second. He had needed privacy. The thought had almost completely slipped her mind. With that reminder, she spun on her heels and approached the counter.

Jimmy and Carmen watched her leave, a silence falling over them. It was Jimmy who broke it with a heavy sigh. "Beautiful girl," he pointed out. "It was a smart move to put her in the front." Carmen's hands moved to his hips. He had been itching for a cigarette all day, but couldn't talk himself into going for a smoke. Not after the incident with the health inspector. It was almost enough to have him quitting.

"What are you doing here, Uncle Jimmy?" Carmen asked, turning his body toward the older man. His face was clouded with distrust, with embarrassment. Every day, he felt like he was nailing the top of his coffin closed. Every day, it only seemed to get worse. The grade that morning felt like the final nail and with Jimmy's visit, Carmen feared that maybe he was dead. Maybe he had actually died in that apartment fire and he was going through judgment.

"Sugar told me you were home," he informed the man. "I'm a little hurt you didn't let me know yourself." Carmen almost scoffed. He had love for Jimmy. He had been a father figure ever since he could remember. But he knew that Jimmy wasn't there for him. He knew that wasn't the case, because when was it ever? He squeezed his eyes closed, teeth grinding together. "Yeah, well, I've been kinda busy," he responded, bluntly.

Jimmy scoffed. "Yeah," he replied with as little humor as he could muster. "Sure looks like it." The sound of her sneakers broke the building tension. Their heads turned to see Miyeon approaching with a beaming smile. "We're gonna sit over there," Carmen informed her, finger pointed toward the window bar she had just been cleaning. She tipped her head in a slight nod, maneuvering her target to their destination. "How long have you been working here, sweetie?" Jimmy asked, following after her.

The glasses hit the table with a soft thud. Her hands reached instantly for the sponge she had been using to clean the windows. "Couple weeks," she replied. "It's been fun. Lots of stuff's happened. The customers can be nice, too." Jimmy nodded his head. Carmen's jaw tensed. "What's it like working under this guy? You like him?"

Breath stopped short in her throat. Her eyes widened slightly in surprise. Carmen couldn't stop himself from looking at her, wondering the same thing. "O-Of course," she replied, her lips twitching nervously. "Carmen is a great boss. Much better than my last one, and a few before that. He's honest and he looks out for us. It feels... like a family here."

His heart was going into overdrive. Warmth surfaced beneath his skin. He was sure he was blushing. "That's good to hear," Jimmy said. His eyes cut to the man standing beside him. "Thank you for the water. I've got a lot to discuss with my nephew." She clasped her hands behind her back, nodding her head. "Of course. Holler if you need anything else." She glanced toward her boss, offering him a reassuring smile that made his face flush even more.

She spun on her heels and made her move toward the kitchen. She was almost positive she could talk to Marcus while he worked, or she'd take a break at the lockers. She had just downloaded a Bingo game on her phone the night before and hadn't had time to try it out. The door was cold beneath her hands as she shoved it open. Without Richie, the restaurant became so quiet. It was almost eerie.

"Hey, Mimi," came Marcus' voice from his little hole in the wall. "Come feel this bread." Her brows furrowed in confusion, but made her way over. Marcus already had her a piece out, a proud smile forming on his features. "Soft," she said, ripping a piece from the end. She wasn't too sure what she should say. She'd never made bread ever in her life. But she plopped it into her mouth, a hum leaving her throat. "Shit."

"Good," he said, though she assumed it had meant to be a question. Her head nodded in agreement before she ripped another piece off. "You know what it reminds me of?" His head shook slightly as he leaned against the wall with a grin. He knew that she'd tell him even if he didn't ask. "It reminds me of this Italian restaurant back home. It was run by this older couple and everything was homemade, right?"

She paused, a smile growing across her face. "They always played Italian music. Like, uh, Mambo Italiano or Come Prima. And I remember sitting there, dancing in my seat with my dad. He used to say that Italian was the only other language he'd bother to learn." Her eyes cut down to the bread in her hand. It had been so long since she had thought about that place. Fairview, it was called. And it was small, and everything was wooden. It felt so much like home that every time Miyeon had gone there and eaten, she'd pass out in her chair.

"I learned my first Italian phrase there, too," she said, eyes flashing with mischief. Marcus scoffed. "What was it?" She stood straight, clearing her throat for a dramatic flair. It had Marcus rolling his eyes at the girl. "You ready?" His head bounced impatiently. "Okay, so it was... testa dura."

She probably butchered the pronunciation. It had been so long since she had last heard it. Despite that, it rolled off of her tongue confidently. Marcus looked at her, confused. "It means hardhead. The waitress used to call me that." He chuckled to himself. It was nice seeing her open up and tell them things. Before now, it was almost like she was a ghost. "Why'd she call you that?"

"Because I'm stubborn," she replied without hesitation. He couldn't believe that, not yet. The two smiled at one another. "I also know how to say bite my ass in Italian." He choked out a surprised laugh, eyes wide as he stared back at her. She couldn't stop her own laughter from flooding out of her. "I'll tell you it if you say it to Richie when he gets back."

He scoffed. "Dude probably wouldn't even know what it means." She laughed again. Wouldn't that be even funnier? "Alright, alright... So, you have to go up to him, unprovoked and say... baciami il culo."

"Baciami il culo," Marcus repeated. She giggled. "Alright. Cool." Marcus shook his head. Maybe she wasn't that great of an influence after all. If Richie kicks his ass, he knows exactly who to blame. "Godspeed, my friend," she joked, letting a hand fall to Marcus' shoulder. "Godspeed."

rumi says . . .

yeah lol the end of this was
a lot of shit writing basically.
but, surprise ! there's a tiny easter
egg in it. the italian restaurant...
yeah, that was my uncle frances'
restaurant's name ! so wee it felt
nice adding a bit of myself to the
book in a new way (and yes the
food was all homemade & outstanding).

i also wrote this with an italian songs
playlist going & dominick the donkey came
on & it reminded me so much of christmas
time. just a lot of nostalgia in this chapter.

let me know how u guys are feeling !

thank you for reading!
feedback is greatly appreciated!