_________You say failure is a curse, sometimes a blessing isn't all...

first month of reign ;

The glowing and modern facilities contrast with the barely equipped gym and dangerous backyards he used to train in, taking bumps on the glacial floor in winter, more focused on not breaking one of the very few and already falling apart machines in the room.

His sharp sight analyses the performance center with the greatest care before softly shutting his eyes. He inhales the scent of the environment he used to train in , collapsing out of exhaustion and surrounded by musty odors as the polluted air was poisoning his lungs.

Rare are the moments a wrestler gets the chance to sit back and realize the countless miles his journey's filled with. The numerous times he could have lose faith and abandon his dream to settle for a life that wasn't his. It all eventually crashes into his brain and allows him to soak every ounce of deserved pride he may feel deep within.

Rollins' determination has been confronted to so many obstacles along the way that struggling and being in pain almost became regular things to his every day life, accepting the sorrowful sacrifices he had to make in order to get to the very top.

But getting to glory is a vicious circle because it forces you to sell your morals, to inflict lifetime scars to the people around you only to get yourself in the position to succeed.

And once you're there, it is the success that brings you down to your knees, putting you on a pedestal only to admire you fall from even higher.

When you think you're moving forward, you're only walking round and round.

As time goes by and you're trapped in a never ending storm, it gradually destroys each parcel of the person you used to be only to be replaced by a character you're doomed to carry for the rest of your miserable life.

Your memory gets damaged and the sole instants you barely remember are scraps of your high highs and low lows, your biggest achievements and crushing failures colliding in blurry scenes.

Your dream becomes your carreer, your carreer changes into your life and your life ultimately turns into a nightmare as the spotlight you've been chasing for so long is the one making you its helpless prey.

A deep and meaningful sigh escapes Seth's dry lips while he's desperately trying to lay eyes on something capable of numbing his worst fears, the ones he never succeeded in slaughtering.

Innocent laughters almost provoke a slight jolt in his broken body, momentarily putting weight on the bad knee as insanities come off his mouth.

Ever since he sacrified his health in order to protect her dream, it feels like his malevolent task has been reversed toward him. The Reaper's life is slowly starting to fade away caused by an excruciating pain spreading through his left leg.

For a strange reason however the sole view of her tired face being graced by such a pure light, a sincere smile curving her soft lips, is enough to pacify his demons for a minute.

A minute while Rollins' despicable actions are blocked away, unable to hunt him down as he's like protected inside of a gentle alternative universe.

Owens, Sasha and himself are reunited to the place each of their destructive paths begun in order to support the younger generations through WWE's partnership with Special Olympics.

Although the company is indeed caught up with numerous associations, this one is without the shadow of a doubt the one that always had a special place in his devious heart.

It allows him to put things in perspective, to comprehend that people with bigger issues than his are still fighting to achieve their goals.

He envies their strenght as he's well aware his is nothing but an illusion, a mask he's putting every day when he comes to work but that will ultimately break once he's reached the fever pitch of his masquerade.

"You should check this out." The Canadian's voice interrupts his torments to show him an intriguing picture resting in his phone's screen.

Rollins instantly raises his brow, attempting to put a name on the familiar figure presented to his view. A young girl's body apparently fainted in the middle of a filfthy ring, a camera not so far away from her and her gear still drawing her fragile rib cage's lines.

He tilts his head to the side in an interrogative way, still not very sure about the wrestler's identity until Kevin subtly points towards an overjoyed Banks, her exuding out of confidence silhouette drastically contrasting with the woman distinguishable in the frame.

Her resiliency always has been one of her major traits, obsessing over a certain move and repeating it again and again until it's either perfectly done or that she's so exhausted she literally collapses where she's standing.

But what obviously changed is the way she carries herself, how she'd stand up for herself no matter what odds are against her.

She's gone from an oblivious and naive little girl to an unstoppable survivor.

Sure she'd break and bend through her journey, her tears her sole companions more times that she'd like it to be but overall, she would always crawl toward the very top of the mountain.

"She just dropped dead." Rollins amusingly remarks, a part of his brain satisfied that the analys he's done out of her back in their NXT days was definitely right.

"It doesn't remind you of someone ?" Kevin retords, initially on an amused tone until his piercing green eyes wander toward Seth's obvious injury, the one he's attempted so hard to conceal.

Intense gazes are exchanged for a couple of minutes, the Iowa native certainly not taking lightly the fact that anyone apart of him would creep into his carreer's status.

The atmosphere tenses up even more the second he catches glimpse of an horde of medics behind Owens, motioning toward his broken body and sorrowful soul.

He would like to shout the worst insults at his face, to discharge all of his madness on the officials surrounding him in a blink of an eye and urging him to follow them to the medical's area.

"Guess I wasn't strong enough to handle the pressure, after all." Seth cynically lets out on his way out, his eyes fixed upon Sasha and his fist clenched so tight that a couple of crimson drops drip from his palm.

________

A stern door gets brutally opened by an infuriated woman, slightly surprising the face resting on its frame, as she's readying herself to shout every ounce of resentment hold within her heart.

Thankfully enough she never was the type that gets easily blinded by her rage and instead locks her worried eyes into Seth's confused look, tiressly wandering left and right.

He attempts to mumble a semblance of explanation on why he's suddenly showing up at her place, his muscles moving but nothing coming out.

It only adds up to his already scared state and, while her hand gently extends to carress his features, he aggressively shoves her away before entering the vast apartment.

Rollins can't seem to be able to talk, to bring up to light the reasons of his terrified condition but his body language is enough for Leighla to comprehend something terrible must have happened.

He appears entirely vulnerable and desoriented, pacing back and forth as if he's about to break down at any given moment.

The red surrounding his intense eyes gives her a glimpse of the amount of tears he had swallowed for so many years.

That's what happens when people have been too strong for too long : they ultimately implode.

The world around him suddenly turns into a blur as he's losing himself inside of his own struggle, both focused on regaining control and frightened he surely couldn't do so.

Walls feel like closing in, readying themselves to squash him. Blood is pounding faster and faster through his brain, desperate to find the right way to calm itself yet uncapable of clearing the mess inside.

A glacial weather takes place inside of his trembling body, the man so proud turning into a frightened little boy needed to be saved from himself.

As soon as Seth's body touches the ground, he starts hyperventilating. His breath rapidly becomes shallows, as if something extremely heavy was literally crashing upon his heart.

He brings a trembling hand to his chest in an useless attempt to calm the craziness going on inside. The other tense one is laying on the floor, pushing into the ground in hope to regain a semblance of balance and control.

The sole things coming out of his mouth are short sobs drowning intelligible scraps of words. It's like dying to scream for help but remaining unable to form the smallest glimpse of rational demand.

Hopelessness eventually takes over his mind as minutes pass by and he's still trapped inside of his own madness, helpless and terrified.

"I ruined everything." he repeats endlessly, his voice so shaky and stifled it's barely understandable.

Seth stays in that horrifying situation for what seems to become an eternity of insanity, his only wish being to stop the inner hurricane.

Leighla tries to reach to him, wrapping her hand around his shoulders until another silhouette stops her in her track, assuring that it'd be even worse afterward.

He feels like nothing but a dead weight, a walking disaster and that is if he even survives the unbearable crisis he's undergoing.

Rollins entirely loses control over his own thoughts and body while he's been so used to manipulate others around.

Maybe karma truly is a bitch and likes to reverse the curse every once in a while, convincing him he deserves every bit of suffering and fear within his heart as it's almost ripped off from his chest.

"You're going to be okay. Everything will be okay, I promise." Sasha's voice barely reaches its destination, losing itself in a loud and inner chaos.

She kneeled besides him, reassuring words cautiously coming out from her honest and selfless entity, the scary situation he's in being far from an unknown for the fragile and hypersensitive girl still hold deep inside her damaged soul.

"You're not alone anymore, Colby. I'm here with you." His former name strangely helps him to cope with the madness he's trapped in, slowly but surely putting an end to it.

He's still in shock, unable to clarify his thoughts for a while as Sasha keeps talking to him, attempting to get him focused on the most trivial things.

She never stops talking and he never stops listening, holding on to each word coming out from her savior's mouth.

His breathing eventually stabilizes itself whilst she's explaining to him he needs to inhale and exhale deeply, executing her own advice by showing him the example.

The pressure hold inside his hands loosen up and the weight compressing his pounding heart gradually fades away, allowing the air to run peacefully within his veins and lungs.

Although the unsafety's impression is still perceivable through his slightly shaking body, he slowly but surely regains its usual functions.

Sasha offers him the glass of water Leighla filled moments earlier, trying her best to help even though she's far from being acquainted to those type of situations.

Seth keeps his gaze locked on Banks, managing to form short but senseful sentences every so often, answering a bunch of worthless but calming questions.

"Would you accept to be my mentor from now on?" Softly escapes from a joyful Banks', well-aware that acting all concerned about him would only scare him even more.

"May as well finish what you've started all these years ago, don't you think ?" He nods quietly, feeling dizzy and oblivious at this point but strangely glad that someone would still need his help even though he couldn't help himself.

"You didn't ruin anything. You've built me and protected us all." Her precious statement makes its path with a huge delay, hitting his brain and soul way after she spoke them in the first place.

But once they do, they revive a fire within his subdued entity, offering him a new purpose, a reason for him to live through another day.

________

E L E N A ;

Basically, Kevin noticed Seth "re-injured" his knee and talked the medics to check him up and, it turns out he's supposedly out for a little while and will take Sasha's mentor role.

Do you think the diagnostic is a valid one or another of Vince's trick ?

Seth looks extremely affected by all of this, how will he act following the crushing news ?

ps ; the panic attacks' topic is honestly such a hard one to write about for me since, when I was younger, I had to deal with that problem. To say it was tougher than I expected to go back then and try to use my own experience as an "example" here would be an understatement but hopefully, it's worth it all.

ps² ; the scene itself is inspired by HTGAWM's own Connor Walsh.

lots of love for each and every single one of you xxx