When you opened your eyes to let the sun greet you, the bed was empty and you found yourself all alone under the warm sheets. Pan used to call the boys very early for the training so it was no surprise for you at all. What bothered you, was the fact that Thomas did  not even mind to wake you.

A gasp escaped your lips as you stretched your limps and climbed out of the cozy bed, letting the comfortable feeling go and start to dress yourself. The air was warm like usual and the birds sang their lovely song. You grabbed your basket and tried your best to climb with it down the ladder.

'Go! Go! Go!'
'I am moving!'
'Then move faster!'

The boys had formed groups  to find Felix, he has been gone for three days now since the game and no one knew where he could  be. Except you. Guilt overcame you at the thought of that. You were torn apart between your emotions and logical decisons. You could not even answer why you did not tell Pan.

Because he is up to something.

'Y/N!' Javier yelled from across the clearing and trolled over to you, resting his arms against his hipbones. His green eyes looked so pale and the sunlight. 'We need to talk.' He spoke amd nodded over to follow him behind some thick bushes.

'I don't want to.' You snapped back and attempted to walk past him, but before you coukd react he had you by your upper arm and yanked you over to the bushes. 'You have no choice!'

His face was concerned and he checked several times if someone was nearby before he finally turned over to you again.

'Okay listen up fast, we don't have much time-' he swallowed hard and again checked the surroundings before he continued whispering, 'You have no Idea what will happen if we don't find Felix. Pan is unpredictable, he is out of control! I already told you this, there have been a few girls on Neverlamd before, Peter brought them and-'

He snapped and stopped talking as footsteps came near, another group of boys. Javier didn't hesitate and hushed away, leaving you startled back.

'Wait! What happened to them?' You whispered loud but he was already on the move. It was too dangerous for him to bee seen with you. After he left you felt more confused than ever and even terrified.  What are Pan's plans? Why are they no girls around anymore? And why is it so important for Javier to find Felix? Fear overcame you and your body started to tremble. You have always known that Peter Pan was not an innocent boy, the devil would sneak onto his face and his filthy tongue tried to persuade you with his manipulative lies. Like many times before your heart sank to the bottom, not knowing what to do.

Impulisively you ran after a group of boys, trying your best not to be seen by one, They weren't fast enough and seemed to wander around without a plan, one of them stopped and gazed around, changing directions every few minutes. They would never find a person like that.

But they don't even trying.

Javier may not told you why he needed Felix, but deep inside you there was a voice, telling you that the asshole had to come back. He knew something and you would make him tell you. That was the plan. He hid something from you all along, it was time to end this game, to find out what Pan was doing. The theories of what his sadistic mind had in store for you twirrled around in your head and kept biting at your heart, making it feel heavy and aching. Your feet ran uphills into the jungle, travelling over a pathaway with narrow trees and big bushes. Walking that long sounded easier in your head as you thought, the last days have been rough, you've experienced more thrilling moments in one week than ever before. The urge to find Felix gave you the energy to keep walking, but it didn't took long until your flask was empty and you got thirsty. The sound of the rushing river did not sound far away, you changed the diretion and as you walked towards the water your stomach started growling. You clearly haven't  planned this through. You had no food and no water.

You sighted deeply as you held your hands under the clear water and took a sip. The feeling of dryness left your throat and you took a satiesfied glance up to the sky where the trees would granted passage to the sun. A warm breeze ticklet your nose and you took a deep breath before filling your flask and putting it back onto your belt. Deciding to look for food and Felix at the same time you hushed forward. After a while you found some berries and you plucked them to still your hunger, but in the moment you wanted to put them in your mouth a deep voice yelled your name.

'DON'T YOU FUCKING EAT THEM!' The boy's voice screamed and you shrinked as you turned around, letting the berries drop onto the ground, together with ypur brought basket. For a long moment you stared at the boy in front of you, not knowing what to say or what to do. He didn't say anything either, just stared. He still had no shirt on, of course, where should he get another from? The sight of his scarred body overwhelmed you. You could see the wound from the arrow shot, still not healed and it looked bad. His pants were rolled up to his knees and he did not wear shoes at all. The dirt covered his feet and up to his legs. Sweat rolled over his forehead and over his cheeks,dropping down onto his broad, muscular chest.

'Felix...'You were saying his name like it was the most beautiful thing in the world. He tilted his head. 'I looked for you.'

You just stood there, starring at him with big eyes, wanting to go closer, you didn't move as if you were stuck. The lost boy broke away from all the starring and moved towards you and as he moved you did unexpected for him the same. Before he could do anything you were in his arms hugging him and burrying the face in his muscular chest. He smelled good, thatcwas the first thing you noticed. For some reason you even missed it.

'I found you.'

The second in command furrowed his brows and his face showed you his confusuion. He whispered,'If we were honest It was me, who found you.' a big smirk spread over his lips. You let go within a few seconds after you hugged him and tried to sort your emotions. You were scared, for sure, and you were clearly confused. No one told you anything, the games were brutal and even if Neverland had all his flaws, a creepy devil was the king of it, doing anything to get entertainment, even if he had to hurt someone.

'The boys are looking for you, Felix.' You mumbled and looked up to him.'This time for real.'

The second in command let out an angry, exhausted groan and strutted past you. His face contained the same coldness as ever before. You hesitated to follow him, yet decidet to do so. He paced up as he didn't care about you trying to keep up, not a single glance back. He just stormed through the moss covered trees and headed through the woods to a long path which would lead him back to the camp. He knew every route, so far you have always tried to remeber from which direction you came from. The days on Neverland wasn't as careless for you as they were to the boys and you didn't know the Island as good as them.

'Can you stop for a moment?' You groaned exhausted and almost stumbled over a rock, but managed to keep balance through a weird dance-looking movement. The second in command did not stop, he did not even look at you to even notice the almost tragic fall. You chuckled in amusement as you thought how funny your drop must have looked like, before you ran after Felix before he was out of sight. Right as you found yourself next to him you stumbled again, but this time Felix grabbed you by the collar and held you. He yanked you up to your feet and faced you, not showing a single thing from his mind. There was dark shadows in his face, they made him look more intimidating.

'Watch it.' He mumbled and let go of you. 'You'll only get hurt out here.What are you even doing out here?' his tone was mocking. You scoffed in respond and continued walking the path along.

'I can go where the guck I want to!' You yelled ball and formed your hands into fists.

This boy was either an asshole or an angel, nothing in between. He was no different than Pan, so why should you trust him? Why should you trust Javier, or anyone else? This Island was a mess and with each day on it you wanted to leave even more. But where to go? You had no plan, you were not even aware why you landed here on Neverland, an Island only filled with teenage boys that had no rules.

'I asked you something!' Felix said. The camp was already in sight by now and even if you did not want to be around the boys, it was way better than having the grumpy second in command as company.

'I don't fucking care, Felix! Why are you so cold? I only told you the boys were looking for you!'

'You don't understrand, (Y/N).'

He moved slowly towards you and put his hands rough on your shoulder, pulling you back. His eyes were searching for movements, if someone else were in sight. 'You have no idea what is going on.' He scoffed and pushed you a little backwards.He appeared to be more intimidating now than before. His face did not even flinch. Your feet moved away from him until your back hit a tree and the lanky blonde boy almost bent over you. There was a cold in his eyes that pierced through your bones. You could feel his warm breath against your face, he was so close that he made you feel uncomfortable.

'You are not meant to be here, you don't know anything of this place!'He growled and backed away. You let out an annoyed groan and if the lost boy weren't that tall you would might hit him. No one except him kept telling you that this was not a home for you. He clearly couldn't stand having a girl around.

'Screw yourself, Felix.' you said composedly and finally stamped away from him. As you entered the camp, you were greeted by the unpleasant group of boys that made jokes about you this earlier, more them who had started this charade. You tilted your head and your eyes meet Gleb's. He fromed his lips into a kiss and for a brief moment you wanted nothing more than throwing a knife into his direction. How could he even dare mocking you? This was not even the worst, Felix behind stood behind you, mumbling a, 'What the fuck?' as he looked concerned at the boy before he left without saying another word. His confusion would soon get replaced by all the gossips around. 

'What is your problem?'

'Just fooling around. Are you girls too sensitive for that, or what?'He mocked you and caused the other boys through his laughing to also start chuckling. They all gave you the same look that told you how less they thought of you. You weren't as strong as the boys, for sure, but they all lived on Neverland for a decade, you were just washed up on the shores one day, unconcious, almost drowning. If girls weren't allowed on Neverland, why would any of them try saving you? Thomas was the only one not being all mean to you, and by now your thoughts swifted over to him, not caring about the other boys words or stories.

'Saw you found Felix. That fucker will smite you one day, you know? That boy is a sick piece of shit!' A dark chuckle escaped his throat and suddenly Gleb's eyes were glistening. How in the hell could you kiss him? It has been a silly game, he knew it. You could still feel how his cold lips pressed against yours when you thought about it. It wasn't bad back then, but it was rather the way you missed being touched by anyone who liked you. Almost pathetic to act this way, this mistake shouldn't be repeated.

'Just leave me the fuck alone!'You hissed at Gleb and rolled your eyes, your feet leading towards the middle of the camp where Javier sat aside Thomas and Felix. At the sight of the lanky blonde boy you shivered. You did not dare, or even had the intention to walk over to them, but the a sharp whistle from Javier caught your attention. His head beckoned you over to them, but as you looked into the second in command's face, you froze. He looked terribly angry and you wondered if it was because of you.

You shook your head.

Thomas now also winked you over, his white teeth shinning bride. You crossed the space between you and the three lost boys, and with each step you got more nervous and regreted your decision, almost deciding to go back. You stopped. To your left sat Javier, his green eyes glistered in the sun, almost looking like jade. The only one looking quite pleasant seemed to be Thomas, of course. He even offereed you a seat on a log.

'Where is Pan?' You asked silently, it was a wonder that they all understood your mumbling.

'On his thinking tree. He joins this evening for some games.' Javier answered and glanced around. Felix grunted and held his aching shoulder. He had immediately dressed himself when the boys had started mocking him for finally getting wounded. But how did he even get wounded? You remembered how you sat in the tree with him and quickly changed your thoughts before your cheeks turned red.

Jerk.

'I don't want another game that concludes shooting with arrows at each other.' The second in command huffed and made an furious face.

'This is serious, mate. You know what will happen.' Javier hissed at Felix and punched his shoulder. The second in command jumped growling to his feet, glaring at the other boy, a threatening pose and a harsh punch back came from him, before he left hurrily the clearing and went back to his cabin. Not even able to describe your confusion you watched him as he stormed of, before your head turned back to Javier and Thomas, which didn't care about this escalation at all. Javier stood up and followed the lanky boy with slow feet. 'Gotta check on this bastard!' He simply smiled and went off.

'What is wrong with Felix?' You asked.'He is always so aggressive.'

Thomas chuckled and looked amused over to  you. 'You should see him when he really freaks out!' He bursted out laughing and you remembered how you patched him up after Felix had beaten him up for no reason.

'Thomas, why are you still his friend, I mean after he...he...-'

'After he beat the shit outta me?'

'He is ruthless!'

The freckled boy chuckled again and gave you a sweet smile. 'He follows orders, Y/N. There are things on Neverland that you won't understand.' He lowered his voice and you knew he was talking about something that shouldn't be heard by anyone else. But he spoke like everyone else, in puzzles.

'Fuck this,' you snapped and pressed your arms against your hips with an angry movement,'Everyone tells me that I don't understand anything! I am sick of being the deer in the headlight, just tell me what makes Neverland so special! What happened to the other girls-'

'The other girls?!' Thomas tried not to scream, his eyes were wide open and he looked slightly terrified. 'Who told you about the other girls?' His voice darkened, so did the feautures of his face. The friendly smile was gone, replaced by a wrinkled nose, his brows were pushed together. You weren't  scared, but you knew now Thomas had like all the other boys, a side that you did not want to know.

'Why are you so mad?' You choked out, unable to react.

'Just never speak about it!'

You nodded quickly and sat there in silent as he also left quickly the clearing , leaving you all alone and with thousand questions in your mind. What was the big secret no one was willing to tell you? You weren't dumb and could put one and one together, so finding out that Pan played a big role with those missing roles wasn't a heavy task. The way more serious question was which role the boys played with that, or which role Felix was playing. He was cold, he was ruthless and you stopped believing his words, that he would never hurt you.