Two pale eyes looked over the room adorned with black curtains. Two feminine arms crossed against an ample chest as the woman they belonged to. The woman swallowed, trying to hold back the feeling she felt as she looked over the room. Everything was still raw and the smallest thing seemed to twist the pain in. Rangiku could control her emotions, but she knew after the event she would be bawling her head off to Nanao as well as drinking a lot of sake. She couldn't though lose it in front of everyone, as she needed to put on a strong face.

At the front of the room was a large shrine and on this shrine was a picture of a child. The child had beautiful bright teal eyes that were narrowed in annoyance. Rangiku wished she had been able to find a picture where he had been more child like with his eyes, but hadn't been able to find one in time. The child also had beautiful white hair that cascaded down in front of his eyes. For those who didn't recognize the Shinigami outfit they might assume that the child was dressed for some kind of family photo, but truth of the matter was this child never knew his real family.

Near the picture was a bowl with incense sticks smoking as per the tradition. There was also the usual bowl of rice that was given to the dead in remembrance as well as some objects as well. To the left of the picture was a vase filled with the flower of the division as well as the flower for the thirteenth division. To the right were two toys that were hand carved with a great deal of care. One was a traditional top and the other was a whistle done in the shape of a dragon.

These items seemed out of place for someone who was a captain, but they had also been gifts from Isshin and Kaien of the Shiba clan. These were the items she had started with, but more flowers and more toys had come into the room. This of course confused her as she understood flowers at a funeral and perhaps toys for a child who actually acted like a child, but not for her taicho. This caused her to swallow as she wasn't sure what to think about the gathering of toys. In some ways it made her want to burst into tears right then and there.

Ukitake came and stood beside her. "How are you handling things?"

"I'm not handling things well, truth be told. I've lost them both. Gin, now my small taicho. There were certain things I realized too late I think and I'm going to have to live with that the rest of my life."

"My advice to you Rangiku is to live. Keep Shiro-chan locked in your heart, not forgetting about him."

"Except I forgot about him before, and the idea of forgetting about him again scares me." Rangiku continued to survey what was going on. "Ukitake... how are you going to handle this? You've dealt with the deaths of may of your comrades."

The man sighed. "This one is going to be harder. Shiro-chan wasn't simply a comrade. Actually... I've never had a comrade die who was a child Rangiku. This whole thing... it feels so wrong."

"I know."

"Well... Kyoraku is waiting for me. If you need to ever talk, feel free to come over."

"Thank you." Rangiku watched as the man went over to the head captain. "Why do I get the feeling that he's the one whose going to need to talk more then anyone about this."

She took a deep breath and watched as people continued to come and pay their respects. More flowers and stuffed animals arrived. "Why? He hated being treated as a child."

"This completely stinks! It's absolutely stupid!"

Rangiku turned her head to see Renji. She took a deep breath, not at all pleased with the fact he was going off. Everything had been carefully planned. She walked over to him. "Abarai... what do you mean that is stupid?"

"It's stupid that the fukutaicho of the first division got a captains burial but he doesn't."

Rangiku took a deep breath. "Abarai... my small taicho was quite fond of the fukutaicho of the first division."

"I'm not saying that he didn't deserve a full captain's burial, but Hitsugaya of all people deserved full honors. It..."

Ikkaku suddenly appeared to Renji's side, making a rather irritated face at the younger Shinigami. "Can it. Can't you see you're upsetting her?"

Yumichika also surprised. "It's also not the right venue for complaining about this particular subject. Mind you... you're not the only one who is upset about all of this. However... having been there..."

Renji backed down and bowed to Rangiku. "I sincerely apologize for my rude behavior Ms. Rangiku."

He then darted away. Rangiku turned to look at the two. "So..."

"We came to pay our respects." Ikkaku turned his head away.

"I'm grateful for that." The woman turned to look at the small shrine. "I don't understand all the toys though. Taicho hated being treated like a child. Most everyone should know that. I could understand Hinamori... but..."

The woman stopped, suddenly biting into her knuckle. Yumichika raised an eyebrow. "Wasn't that one of Hitsugaya Taicho's bad habits?"

Rangiku blinked a couple of times, caught off guard by this statement. Ikkaku however held out something to her. It was a wooden toy that he had taken the time to make. "The reason everyone is bringing toys is because everyone is aware that he missed out on his childhood. That bothers a lot of people. Myself included."

The woman found herself biting her lip as Ikkaku headed over to add his gift to the small shrine. Yumichika however didn't leave. "How are you doing?"

"What do you mean?"

"He died in your arms Matsumoto. You couldn't stop crying even after his body disintegrated. Do you feel like you failed him?"

"Is that really something you should be asking?" Rangiku continued to fiddle with her lip.

"I ask it because you seem to be beating yourself up about what happened. You did your best. Hitsugaya Taicho also wouldn't want you beating yourself up about this."

"Truth be told that's not what I'm beating myself up about." The woman took a deep breath. "I'm beating myself up because in the last two years I've lost the two most important men in my life. I don't feel like I can get close to anyone again."

"You know... Gin may still be alive. It was never confirmed what happened to him after the winter war."

Rangiku took a deep breath. "That just makes things worse. If he was alive... if he is alive, I don't think I'd be able to face him without wanting to kill him. Not after what happened to taicho."

Yumichika simply stood there, the silence lasting for a good few minutes. "Rangiku... is there something you're hiding from everyone."

The woman took a deep breath. "Don't worry. There is no point in bringing it up with anyone now. I don't want anyone's pity about this."

She continued to watch the wake and finally it was over. Dozens of toys and bundles of flowers were on the small shrine. She found herelf taking a deep breath, only to turn to see Nanao and her taicho coming to see her. Kyoraku tilted his hat. "Rangiku... this may not be the right time to bring this up. A few people... no, a lot of people... they've asked if the shrine can be left open to the public. I know you were wanting it to be private..."

"Why? Why would..."

"He was well loved."

"Well... I can't say no to that logic." Rangiku took a deep breath.

"Taicho... if you don't mind, I'm going to go out to drink with Matsumoto Fukutaicho."

"No... that's all right. I've got to see to Jushiro. He's not handling this well. Rangiku, if you could do me a favor could you visit him daily."

"Yeah... when I can. He always doted on my small taicho and I appreciated that." She turned to head out with Nanao, taking a deep breath as she did.

Nanao walked along with her. "So... who are you going to tell about this?"

"I honestly don't know. There is really no need to tell people that taicho... my small taicho, happens to be my child." She paused, remembering the eyes that had gone from a bright teal color to a pale teal color that matched Gin's. "No... there is one other person I need to tell. Ukitake Taicho. I'd feel bad about not sharing this with him, considering how much he's always cared about taicho."