Chapter 7
Evelyn

I looked at my soul-bonded's sorrowful eyes as she looked upon my smaller figure. It is a beautiful night, but one filled with the agony of loss and a touch of fear mixed with regret.

I feel that fear.

The fear that runs through one's veins as it slowly poisons the soul. The only way to crack a breaking heart is to smash the fragile pieces. The woman who was meant to be my salvation would be my downfall.

Just another tragedy to my never-ending stream of it.

Effort.

It is taking a great deal of that to keep my face passive and my heart beats steady. I don't know how much I really have to offer the woman before me, but I can be strong in these moments. I can give her this one final gift.

"It would be my greatest honor, if you would allow me the privilege of a final dance, my heart." She says as she reaches her out. My chest cracks in two as ivy vines claw their way into my bleeding soul.

Every inch of me screams to push her hand away- take her someplace safe and never let her go. No, I tell myself. This is what she wants.

This is what she needs.

I should die right alongside her, I think. But I won't. My heart will.

I take her hand as my eyes grow watery despite my best efforts. I feel a thumb run along my face and up to my eye as she flicks away the forming tears.

"The moon is stunning tonight, thank you for everything." She says softly as she pulls me close and we start to sway.

I try for a feeble smile, my eyes already aching, "the privilege was all mine."

She loves to dance- she loves art and the beauty of life. She loves everything that she cannot have. She is a Queen and Queen's do not falter in their duties. Peace was meant for another life- certainly not this one.

I wanted that for her. I want her to find peace in the life after this one. Maybe the next world can give her what I never could.

Crack.

Another part of me falls to shreds.

We continue to sway for a few moments as we simply savour in each other's presence. She starts to lead me into a traditional Varsillian dance. A dance of unity between two people.

She spins me- letting my hand go for a moment as my body twirls with the momentum of the push. Our feet become a slow whirl or art on the pavement- the moon full and shining as it casts a light onto our two lone figures.

A soft, gentle, smile that seemed to be reserved only for takes on her usually cold face as she laughs, "I love you, my little sparrow. Never doubt that."

I could not stop the lift of my lips at the name. I wish I could fall right beside her.

She spins me gently this time, taking care to keep hold of my fingers as another couple walks by, their chatter barely reaching our ears as we stare into each other's eyes.

Beautiful, fierce, tundra's look out my own violet ones- clashing in a storm.

There is no music but the melody of the night, the wind and the river.

When we started into the final steps of the dance and I clung tight to her fingers in a silent gesture.

"It has been a journey, Evelyn Aculiac- one that I was glad to have walked with you by my side." She tells me.

My eyes close. How can I possibly face the inevitability of this impossible situation. "I wanted forever," is my reply. I continue, "how selfish of me."

She pulls her hand up to caress my cheek gently, "I wanted to give you the world, but this will have to suffice."

"I'll miss you- and remember you." I choke out.

Her smile is simply sad, "I know."

I try to pull her into another spin, but she stops me and hugs me close.

Love is passion.

Love is poison.

She squeezes me tight- hanging on for dear life as she pours her sorrow into me, "I love you."
I don't let go of her as she starts to pull away. She strokes my hair and forces us apart. I manage three words of my own before I succumb to my own emotion, "I love you."

And then she was gone.

I cry out into the open air, falling to my knees. Clawing at my face I try to wish the pain away. Nothing- nothing is going to make it better
I am dying.

The bond between us shatters and I scream, clawing at my chest as I come unhinged.

My world had fallen apart and it would only be a matter of time before I fell too.

In that moment, I shut everything off.

I am never enough.

I am so sorry.

O0oo0O

New Orleans was just as beautiful as it was the day I left my heart to rot and burn here.

It had just turned night and I had been here to watch as the sun dimed and the moon took its place in the sky. The duller oranges and yellows had been refreshing from the typically violet hues of Varsillia's sunsets.

The lights- as in lightbulbs, not flames, were lit all through the city and the streets buzzed with life as the nightlife came out to play. People in less than modest attire filled the darkened lanes as rowdy patrons at bars started to scream tunes that could only imitate music.

The Mississippi was making gentle noise as it flowed from north to south. Street lights illuminated the path that led from my river house to my spot outside.

Tonight I would rest, tomorrow I would sway the witch covens to my side.

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