"Hold me feel my heart beat,
Put your arms around me"

***

Dan was a singer.

It was one of the many things that had Phil so intrigued by him; he was always mumbling under his breath some random lyrics he was working on, or flat out belting his favorite songs, and it was always beautiful. His voice was a godsend that was greatly treasured by everyone who had the pleasure of hearing it.

His vocals were the main attraction of his band, TCE, or that's what Phil liked to think. He honestly wouldn't have ever listened to any of their music if he hadn't personally heard Dan's singing, wanting to hear how it sounded with different chords and beats accompanying it.

And Dan was never shy about singing, whether it was in public, or at practice, or when he was alone with Phil and they had nothing better to do. Those were some of his favorite moments they spent together.

So it came as quite a surprise when he was calling Phil at six in the morning on Monday, complaining about stage fright.

"You've never been nervous about singing in front of people before, babe." Phil said, the phone shoved between his shoulder and ear as he looped a belt through his jeans. School didn't even start for another two hours, but Phil couldn't find it in him to even try and go back to bed. Once he was awake, it was impossible to fall back asleep. "What's so different now?"

"There's gonna be so many people there." Dan said, his voice slightly muffled, possibly because he was still in bed, his face shoved into the pillows like he did whenever he was feeling insecure. "All of our other gigs have always been medium sized, if not extremely small. Like, 150 people at most, and even that's nerve wracking. This is the biggest audience we've ever had."

"Well, there's always the most popular solution." Phil said, staring in the mirror over his dresser as he tried to make something of his hair. "Imagine them all naked."

Dan laughed on his end. "No, they'd only end up looking like you."

"That's a good thing, yeah? Imagine you're just singing to a thousand me's."

"That'd be horrifying."

Phil frowned even though Dan couldn't see him. "Don't hurt my feelings. It's almost like you don't like looking at me."

"Well...."

"Dan Howell, I will dump you over this phone call right now."

Dan laughed again, much louder than before, and Phil smiled. He loved making Dan laugh like that, he didn't do it often.

"You know I'm just kidding." Dan said lightly. "I can't keep my eyes off of you." And Phil would never admit to the small swell of pride he felt in his chest at those words.

"I would hope so." He replied, moving over to the closet to try and find a shirt that wasn't torn in random places and didn't have any offensive words on it. The selection was small, and he settled on a gray Rolling Stones T-shirt that hung loosely on his lean frame. "Hey, have you heard anything new about FTC lately?"

"No." Dan sighed. "PJs been freaking out about it, though, taking all his frustration out on us. Sometimes I wonder if it's even worth it."

Phil agreed wholeheartedly, humming into the phone. "But then no one would get to hear that pretty voice of yours."

FTC was a... competition, for lack of a better word. All kinds of bands and music artists signed up and did their best, playing against other groups in the hopes of making it to the top. It stood for Fuck The City, a name that no one really knew the meaning of but everyone collectively agreed with. It was a bloodthirsty battle of the bands that caused all kinds of drama and tension, because everyone wanted to win. There were stories that circulated the music scene of sabotage and cheating, so lethal and intricate that some people were afraid to even try and enter.

"That's their loss, then. And they can all blame our fucktard of a guitarist." Dan snorted. There was a rustling sound and Phil assumed that Dan was finally getting out of bed.

For all the talk he had heard of the infamous PJ, Phil had never actually met him. He'd seen him in passing, and was always forced to listen to his boyfriend and Chris badmouthing him, but his actual personality was a mystery.

"He is good with his fingers." Phil said with a smirk, leaving his room and flipping the light on in the bathroom, grabbing his toothbrush and turning the water on.

"Hey now." Dan snapped, jealousy just barely leaking through his tense tone. "No talking about other guys' fingers around your easily influenced boyfriend."

Phil only laughed in response, putting Dan on hold for a moment to complete his bathroom ritual. After he'd finished, he headed downstairs to the kitchen, switching the coffee pot on and grabbing a few slices of bread for toast.

He wasn't much of an early riser, usually pushing his luck on when he finally got out of bed and mostly running late to school, and rarely was he up before his parents. After a few more minutes of easy conversation with Dan, he heard the telltale sounds of footsteps coming downstairs.

"Hey, I have to go." Phil said into his phone, watching his mum walk into the kitchen and head straight for the coffee.

"Aww." Dan complained. "I'll see you later, then?"

"Definitely. Make yourself pretty for me."

"Nerd."

Phil smiled and hung up, biting into his toast as he slid his phone into his pocket. "Morning." He said cheerily to his mum, who only yawned at his greeting.

She was a professor at the nearby university, teaching American History, and she took her job seriously. She stayed up quite late most nights, making sure her lesson plans were solid, and any grading or paperwork was completely finished. Phil didn't know how she was even able to function this early in the morning.

Unfortunately, it also meant she took Phil's school life even more seriously. 

"I got a call from your Physics teacher last night." She said after downing half her mug of coffee. "Said your grades aren't improving in the slightest."

Phil looked down at his shoes, noticing one of the laces was untied, trailing across the floor. "I guess." He replied stupidly. His mum sighed tiredly and his stomach twisted guiltily.

"I thought you said you were going try this time, Phil." She said, setting her mug on the counter. "We agreed that letting play in that band of yours required you to at least get decent grades, and right now, you're close to failing."

"I know." Phil sighed, running his hand over his face. "I know, and I... am trying, but I've been extremely busy with a lot of things, and it's all hard to keep up with-"

"Those are excuses." She said calmly. "I just don't want you relying so much on making music, and end up not having some kind of back up plan."

"And I understand that." Phil said. "But, I don't think school's the only thing I need to focus on. I mean, it is important, but I have other things in my life that I need to worry about, too."

"Just... try and do better." His mum said, grabbing her mug and walking back out of the kitchen. Phil watched her leave and exhaled roughly, leaning back against the counter.

He knew it was his fault that his grades weren't so great; he was abort procrastinator and the idea of actually putting work into school was none too appealing. And he had too many distractions as it was. Heinous took up a very large portion of his time, and rest of it was usually reserved for Dan. He couldn't fit in homework and projects anywhere, and he knew that was unhealthy. But that was the way it was, and his parents didn't approve of it all. They didn't know about Dan either, nobody did, it was a risk neither of them could take.

It was way too early, but Phil decided to go ahead and leave, because he didn't think he could survive another hour in the house with his parents. He grabbed his bag from upstairs and his keys before climbing into his car and making his way to school.

The funny thing was, all the members of TCE attended the same school as Phil's band. Maybe that was where the whole rivalry thing had started, Phil didn't really know, but it did make the day a whole lot harder the bear. He couldn't walk to class without one of the other band's members giving him and his friends dirty looks and gestures, or even a few choice words. The upside was that he got to see Dan everyday, though, so he didn't mind it much.

The building was pretty much empty when Phil arrived, being that nobody even tried showing up until five minutes before lessons. He didn't think he'd ever seen it so quiet in his life, and it was actually pretty creepy, if he was being honest. He plugged his headphones into his ears, scrolling through his playlist for a while and trying to find a suitable song, before just pressing shuffle. He smiled as a couple girls have him looks at the volume, obviously not appreciating the heavy bass and drums that could probably be heard down the hall.

He had checked all of his social media and gone through at least ten songs by the time the halls began filling up, and he grabbed all of his things before heading upstairs, to the bathroom furthest down the hall.

Him and Dan had discovered long ago that this particular bathroom was the least frequented in the mornings, since people didn't like making such an unnecessary trip when there were closer bathrooms, and had begun meeting up in one of the stalls before class started. It was routine by now, and Phil always hated when one of them missed a day of school, or ran late and couldn't rendezvous.

Dan was already waiting for him, and as soon as Phil had locked the door, he was attacked by the brown haired boy, being pushed against the wall and kissed fiercely. He yelped in surprise, but smiled and wrapped his arms around Dan, pulling him closer.

"Missed you." Dan breathed against his lips before kissing again, his hands digging into Phil's biceps. Phil pulled away, sighing contentedly as Dan immediately attached his lips to his neck, pressing softly against the skin.

"We saw each other two days ago." Phil replied with a small grin. "And we were on the phone barely an hour ago."

"I get desperate." Dan said, looking him in the eyes with a small pout.

"Oh, I know you do." Phil laughed as Dan slapped his chest. He kissed him again, slowly, reaching up and tangling his fingers into his hair. Dan groaned softly, tightening his grip on Phil's shirt.

The bell interrupted them, making them pull apart reluctantly, and Phil knew he shared the same look of disappointment as his boyfriend. This was pretty much the only time they had together on weekdays, if they both had band practice.

"Call me?" Dan asked, staring up at him expectantly, still clutching his shoulders.

"'Course I will." Phil said, pecking his lips one last time and untangling their limbs. "Would never miss a chance to hear you complain about the world and everyone in it."

Dan rolled his eyes and shoved him out of the open door. The hallway was emptying quickly, a chaotic mess of students trying to make it to class on time, and Phil gripped Dan's fingers for a second longer before they separated, heading off to their own classrooms.

Phil's first class was Algebra II, and it was absolutely torturous as could be expected. The teacher was boring and only spoke in low, monotonous tones, but she was also extremely strict and would call out anybody for even remotely disrupting the lesson. He sat next to Ellie, at least, so it wasn't too bad of an hour.

"Making out with some hopeless girl in the toilets?" His purple haired friend said as Phil sat down, having barely made it before the last bell rang. Phil smiled at him, running his fingers through hair.

"Something like that."

***

a/n: AAAAAAAAAAH, okay sorry I'm just really fucking loving this story so far.

And holy shit, I've gotten so much awesome feedback on the first chapter, and it's like the best thing ever, thank you all for being amazing(phil, haha).

Okay, yeah, that's pretty much it, I hope I'll see you guys later, and enjoy this chapter. Peace :3