Suga pov
Forced to go to a meeting and I run into her how ironic. I mean at least I got to hear her story and why she never stands up for herself.

But. Still.

No. I understand why it's so hard.

I roll over and go into my bedside drawer to look for my sleeping pills I've been up since yesterday and it's like 6:00 am. I sit up then pop open the capsule as soon as I'm about to put it in my mouth jungkook smacks it out of my hand.

"Hyung," He says softly
"Yes?" I say raising my eyebrow, I then sit up to hear what he has to say

"are you taking your sleeping pills again?" he says cautiously

"no, well-"

"then what is this hyung!" he clenches his fist with the pills in his hands he then breathe in and out then he closes his eyes "I'm sorry but um, why are you taking these again if you can't sleep you should try listening to rain or like talk to me watch a movie-"

"it's easy for non-depressed person to do that you don't understand the things that go through our head, you don't understand the trauma that replays on the big screen in our mind, the pain as you relive those memories you swore you'd get over, you just don't understand they aren't just scars they're deep pool wounds" i say as I turn around towards the dark soul mirrored curtain. I stay quiet for a minute to see if he leaves but he doesn't. He stands still scared to make a movement or a sound thinking I'll break any minute. What he does in slowly climb his way into the bed then back hugs me. I can feel his wet face against my back I start to comment but I don't want to break the comforting silence.

"I'm sorry hyung I didn't know that's how you felt, I promise I will do whatever in my power to help you and make you happy again even if that means scraping my knees up you're my best friend and I'd do anything for you" his shaking voice comments
"Just knowing someone is there and willing to help, already kind of makes me happy"

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Rosé pov
Day 3... what's going to happen to me?

I wipe the tears off my face as I get ready for school I mean living breathing hell. I open the bathroom door and see my little brother brushing his teeth I smile slightly when I turn on the shower.

"Oh sister, someone left this in the mail for you," he says as he runs to the room and back, he hands me a cream-colored envelope with gold trim around it. I frown up at it then I open it slowly it's a letter from my ex-boyfriend in Washington.

"Hey girly I know I haven't been writing much lately but school is really kicking my ass, I'm so old fashion I have a phone but I'd rather waste my stamps on writing to you, it's more retro like that you know how I am, you better write back as well! Or we're fighting! , but school is stressful I have so many projects due the same day two group one single it's sad help me :(, anyways please write me back and tell me about your day or week, however, you want to write this

~ love Michael"

I smile brightly then I place the letter in my drawer I'll write him back later when I come home from school. "Thank you, baby, may I take a shower? did you take a shower yet?" I say while bending down to talk to him

"No, I haven't I was waiting for you!" He says smiling
"Okay baby lets take a shower together"

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I arrive at school with damped hair due to my hair dryer blowing up on me I roll my eyes as I head into the school, out of all the days I could wash my hair my dryer stops working today? When it's sixty-five degrees outside. This horrible I feel like my tears will come out my eyes and ill make icicles. out of nowhere, I feel someone put a warm jacket around me. I look back to see it's Austin smiling brightly.

"you seem awfully freezing today" he implies while handing me a cup of coffee I grab it as I shake slightly I return a thank with a slight nod.

"Yeah, I was having a rough morning" I sip the coffee

"hm, don't worry it'll get better" he implies while wrapping his arm my shoulder "or I'll make your day better" he smiles

"you better promise you jerk,"I say while pointing at him

"I promise"

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english class always bores me why do we need to learn how to write as if we're in England or were lawyers it really doesn't benefit us that much. I sigh as I feel some throwing something at me I look back and see no other than Penelope and Marcella. I look in my hair and see pieces of gum in little micro pieces of gum freshly out of her mouth she smiles while waving at me I sigh deeply as I try to take them out my hair but the more I try the more gum builds up I just end up giving up entirely. Why do they bully more over something that I "supposedly" did to her.

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I walk to my locker with a hair full of gum my sigh starts breaking as I try not to cry why am I the only one suffering? Why can't I get help? I feel my esophagus swelling and my bison getting watery and blurry. My hands starts to tremble like an earthquake. My legs start to feel like noodles. But I run. I run until I can find somewhere to sit down, I sit on the bench then place my bag in front of me, I feel around my bag searching for my Benzodiazepines I grab then while shaking struggling to open the cap I waste all the pills on the floor my lungs start to really fail me now until I feel a hand intertwined with mine and a soft voice talks to me.

"Stay with me okay? Think about winter it's your favorite season right?" I nod my head slightly " thank about the cool cut air mixed with the warm crispy heater in the house the smell of autumn leaves with mixtures of gingerbread and pinecones , bright colorful Christmas lights and a fireplace" the person says softly , I feel my vitals calming down and my breathing stops racing I open my eyes and see the same blue haired boy that was at the meeting last night I follow in his eyes to find emotions but they were hidden behind this big black door of pain.

"What's- what's your name?" I say while choking
"Yoongi , and yours?" He smiles as he caresses the back of my hand "rose" his smile comes off bright but the meaning is something else.

"You know what you said yesterday it stuck to my head and I thought we could be friends cause we both have the same things going on" I say softly
"Um- yeah about that I don't think people with mental illness should be friends with one another it could just make it worse for them both you know?" He says still looking into my eyes.

I smile slightly as the tears start to build up in my eyes "yeah sure understandable, I guess we don't fit in with anyone right only expect death huh? Cool" I let go of his hands as I clean up the pills all over the floor then throw them in the garbage on my way out the corridor. Fine if I can't find comfort in the likes of friends I'll just find comfort in the likes of death.

Time until I reach home: two months

Let it begin now.

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Authors note: hello guys it's been a while since I've been on wattpad updating wise, I've been busy taking care of myself mentally I'm still giving myself room to improve and build my self love up it was more important to me than anything. But I did miss you guys a lot I missed typing stories and hoping to see lots of comments and what not! But thank you for being patient with me you guys mean the world to me . Be healthy and have a great life🌈🦋🌺💛