“if i could, i would lay the whole world at your feet—”

The flowers had bloomed.

Migyung couldn't keep the smile off her face as she gazed at the vibrant purple flowers. African violets, Hoseok had told her the name. He had thought the bright colour would help her cheer up everytime she saw them and he wasn't wrong. The flowers brightened up her living room though they were currently on her balcony.

African violets symbolise devotion, faithfulness and commitment. 

Her heart had done a funny flip when she had searched up about the meaning of the flowers. From what Hoseok had told her she was sure he didn't go that deep but sitting under the moonlight on the balcony, his head in her lap, the fingers of one of his hands entwined with hers and takeout boxes pushed in a corner, she couldn't help but hope.

Even in the darkness, Hoseok brought warmth and light in her life and for the first time she didn't want to overthink things and just let life turn out however it did. 

A kiss on her wrist brought her back to reality, with Hoseok, his eyes smiling at her as she ran her hand through his hair. Shaking her head, she bent down and pecked his lips, his hand tangling in her hair as he deepened the kiss, making her sigh.

Kissing him still felt surreal. Unreal. Although they had agreed to take things slowly and put no labels on their relationship, they had both succumbed to their desires. Their feelings seemed to have sneaked up on them unexpectedly even though they both knew they had been more than friends since the beginning and Migyung wouldn't have wanted it any other way.

After that first night, it had turned to two which in turn had turned into four. Now it had been a week since Hoseok continued to visit her every night, as if he couldn't stay away. Not that she could either because before their brains could process their words, they found themselves in each other's arms, greeting with nothing but a kiss. Sometimes soft, sometimes hard. Sometimes slow and sometimes fast. 

“Stay the night,” Migyung said when they parted, his lips finding their way back to her wrist, right over the scar. She didn't find it weird anymore and she definitely did not get angry anymore like the first time he saw her scars. She knew better now.

Hoseok hummed, his hand moving to tuck stands of her hair behind her hair. “Okay but I have work early tomorrow.”

“That's okay,” she said, “you have a set of clothes here you can change into.”

He grinned and sat up between her legs, leaning back against her and putting his head on her shoulder. Migyung wrapped her arms around his shoulders, his hands falling on her thighs. They had become comfortable with touching each other freely, no shyness, no hesitation.

“Can I tell you something?” he asked after a beat of silence. She readily told him to go ahead and he took a deep breath before continuing.

“This feels like a dream. Me and you, sitting here like this. Touching and kissing each other so freely. I feel like I'm suddenly in a story and I'm the main character by mistake.”

Migyung giggled and squeezed his arm lightly. “Mistake? Baby, everyone is the main character in their story of life. Give yourself more credit.”

He stayed silent for a while, his fingers absently caressing the scar on her knee. She stayed silent, patient, waiting for him to speak because it wasn't everyday he talked about himself. She wanted him to open up to her more, trust her with his feelings like she trusted him. Hence, she stayed silent and continued to touch him soothingly.

Suddenly he was sitting up straighter and turned around to face her. It surprised her but she didn't protest as he sat cross legged before her. She copied him and paid all her attention to him. From the way he ran a hand through his hair to his eyes that kept moving everywhere only to come to rest on her face, on her eyes.

“You are beautiful, Migyung.” His confession made her eyes widen. “Absolutely breathtakingly beautiful. Even when you are sick, even when you cry and get mad at me and especially when you smile. It makes me feel weird and I just… I’ve never…I—” he took a calming breath, collecting his thoughts.

“I’m not extraordinarily handsome. I mean, I wore a freaking mask during our debut to hide my face. Who am I kidding? I’m not handsome, period. I didn't have a large fanbase dedicated to me for so long, got no birthday wishes from fans while the others got them in abundance. I’m not saying I’m jealous or I’m bitter about the past… What I'm trying to say is that I’m not people’s first choice and it just feels unreal that someone like you, beautiful, kind and intelligent likes me. That you let me touch you and look at me as if I’m this great person when I’m no—”

She didn't let him finish. She wouldn't let him finish simply because she didn't believe it. So, she cut him off with a hard kiss, holding his face still with her hands. It took him by surprise, she could tell but she needed him to stop thinking like that about himself.

“Now, you listen here, Jung Hoseok,” she said, pulling away enough to look into his eyes properly. “You are handsome. So handsome and hot that I lost my shit a week ago when you flashed me your abs and I've been losing it ever since I met you. So what if you are a second choice for some people, you are the first choice for many others. You are my first choice. Always. Because you are not just handsome but also gentle, warm, kind and so much more. And all this bullshit about me being kind and intelligent? You need to wake up, mister because I'm the dumbest person you’ll ever meet. Don’t doubt yourself so much. You are a good person. And I swear to Buddha, if you ever talk like that about yourself, I will break my vows of non violence and kill you.”

“You can break them because you already broke your vows of not drinking and doing drugs,” he said quickly, his lips twisting up amusedly seeing her face becoming red and puffing up in anger.

At his words, her hands fell away and she leaned back, her eyes narrowing as she said, “I take back my words. You can see your sexy ass out of the front door.”

The man chuckled and was quick to cup her face and pepper kisses all over her face, telling her he was just joking. She resisted at first but soon melted in his arms and kissed him back, her fingers tugging his hair, pulling him closer and kissing him harder. Tongue darting out to wet her lips, he pulled her on his lap, kissing her for all he was worth because he just couldn't help it.

He hid his feelings behind words but the way she spoke did something to him. It struck him straight in his heart. So long he had waited to hear someone speak so passionately about him, someone who wasn't obliged to say those words, someone he had bared his heart to. The insecurities were deep embedded in his brain and simple words like that wouldn't drive them away immediately but he was grateful to hear them. He was grateful for that little validation even if he knew it shouldn't matter. 

“Hoseok…” she moaned, pulling away to take a breath but it only hitched when he kissed that spot on her neck, right where it met her shoulder. She felt the change in the air, in his demeanour as he continued kissing her skin as if he couldn't get enough and she damn near melted when he pulled her closer with a firm grip on her ass, letting her feel exactly how much he liked her.

“We… we should probably stop,” a squeal left her lips at the last words when he squeezed her ass a little hard and pulled away. His lips glistened in the moonlight and his face was flushed. She was sure she looked the same but the way he looked at her made her feel glorious.

“I’m sorry,” he said, closing his eyes and settling his hands loosely around her waist. “I got a little carried away. Your words, they just got to me.”

She laughed, rubbing her nose against his as he opened his eyes to look at her again. “What part? Because if that's how you react everytime I say something nice to you, I will keep saying it all the time.”

This time it was him who laughed. “Whatever happened to taking things slowly?”

She shrugged, “I’ve had a dry spell for too long.”

Hoseok groaned loudly, leaning his forehead against her shoulder but it soon turned into laughter and then a compatible silence as she hugged him as tightly as possible, letting him use her to comfort himself.  

Her eyes fell on the violets again and those violets suddenly took a physical form in her heart. Looking at them, knowing what they meant, she promised to be faithful to him. She promised to be his number one supporter, the one who always told him the truth because he deserved it. They were going to take it slowly but she could already feel herself committed to him completely. Even if he didn't reciprocate. He was her sunshine, her safe haven.

Little did she know, he was making all the same promises while he looked at those flowers even though he knew it wouldn't be an easy path to follow. She was his sunshine, his safe haven.

"You are amazing, Hoseok," she whispered into the night, trailing her fingers over his back. "You are the best man I have ever met in my life and I'm so glad we met. I don't know know what I would be doing right now if you weren't with me. So, please, never ever put yourself down because you are my hope. You deserve the world."

Her words made him feel his heart squeeze in his chest. He had to take a deep breath to calm himself down before he said, "Stop or I will cry."

She laughed, pulling away and cupping his face to make him look at her. She looked at him solemnly, a gentle smile on her face and said, "It's okay if you cry. I will hold you just like you did for me without judging you."

And so, he let her hold him and poured everything out, trusting her to keep him safe.

He had never felt so loved before.

~~~~
A/N:

Hoseok needs to be protected at all costs 😭🤧

Did you guys watch his performance at Lollapalooza? He went complete nuts but it just showed to everyone that he was born to be on the stage and he is a true performer. I'm still getting goosebumps thinking about it.

As for this chapter and the dialogues where he shows his insecurities, he has never said it on camera as far as I know but just knowing the past and putting myself in his shoes, I do think he struggled a lot back then and you can see how he is still amazed by fans' response during his solo performances. So let's be kind to everyone bcuz everyone deserves to be happy and loved.

Hope you liked this chapter and
Thank you for reading 💜💜

P.S.
I'm thinking I'll go on hiatus again till 4th September bcuz I have too many exams and my GS is so bad. So, this might be the last chapter that I publish this month.