Son Of A Toilet God? 

CELESTIA AND ANNABETH were assigned to by Chiron to nurse Percy Jackson back to health. He thought that the best bet was to keep Percy's arrival as quiet as possible, naturally, the whole camp knew. Annabeth wasn't really a medic person, and Celestia practically did the whole nursing while Annabeth was just there for moral support. And taking care of the raven-haired boy was perhaps, the most boring thing she's ever done. "He drools," Annabeth snorted, her eyes glued to her ancient greek book as she sat across from Celestia.

"No shit sherlock," Celestia quipped, wiping the drool off Percy's chin with a paper towel, "I've definitely noticed that he fucking drools considering I'm the one nursing him back to health."

Annabeth shrugged, "All I know is that I'm glad I'm not wiping the drool off his chin,"

"You should be," Celestia chided, "This is a job for two, Bethy-boo. And I remember quite clearly that Chiron assigned us both to nurse him─" she cut herself off and rolled her eyes as Annabeth seemed to ignore her by focusing on her book.

The Daughter of Hera snickered as she fed him another spoonful of nectar and wiped the drool off his chin. A smirk made its way onto her face as she just imagined how much information she had over Percy's head. She was just about to tell Annabeth to grab a camera to capture the moment, a groan escaped Percy's lips. Annabeth jumped to her feet, "What will happen at the summer solstice?" Annabeth asked hurriedly.

"Huh?" Percy was delirious and Celestia was one second away from knocking him back to sleep

"Annabeth he isn't in shape for an interrogation─"

"What's going on? Something was stolen! What was it? We've only got one fucking week!"

"Huh? What─Celia?"

Celestia did the smartest thing and she punched Percy right in the face as he was knocked back into sleep. Annabeth turned to glare at her. "We could've gotten information from him!"

Celestia frowned and crossed her arms, "You can't just interrogate a patient who had just woken up from a coma!"

"You can't just punch someone back to sleep!" Annabeth countered

"I just did, and maybe if you had actually helped me take care of him. I would've let you interrogate him!"

A few days later, Andromeda and Celestia were summoned to the big house. It was Percy's last day of being a coma patient. They waited for a few minutes and Annabeth seemed very giddy. "Do you think we'll actually get a quest?" she asked, as Celestia shrugged just as excited as Annabeth about the prospect of a quest.

"I think so, there is a whole lot of shit happening up there, and the only way to fix it is with a quest," Celestia replied as Annabeth furrowed her brows in thought, muttering words like 'the one' 'big three' 'prophecy' 'stolen'

Suddenly, a voice cried, "Mr. Brunner! Celestia!" Celestia craned her neck around to see in his full glory, Percy Jackson.

Chiron turned and smiled at him. His eyes had that mischievous glint they sometimes got in class when he pulled a pop quiz and made all the multiple-choice answers B. "Ah, good, Percy," he said. "Now we have four for pinochle."

He offered Percy a chair to the right of Mr D, who looked at him with bloodshot eyes and heaved a great sigh. "Oh, I suppose I must say it. Welcome to Camp Half-Blood. There. Now, don't expect me to be glad to see you."

"Uh, thanks." Percy scooted a little farther away from him.

"Annabeth? Celestia?" Mr. Brunner called to the blond and brunette girls.

She came forward and Mr. Brunner introduced them. "These young ladies nursed you back to health, Percy. Annabeth, Celestia, my dears, why don't you go check on Percy's bunk? We'll be putting him in-cabin eleven for now."

Celestia nodded begrudgingly while Annabeth said, "Sure, Chiron."

Celestia stared at the Minotaur horn in his hands, Percy had probably expected her to swoon and tell him how cool he was, instead she snorted, "You drool a lot when you sleep," And with that, she sprinted off to join Annabeth, her head of brown hair flying behind her.

"Did you have to tease him?" Annabeth asked sarcastically.

"Oh yes. I am never letting that one go," she grinned.

Annabeth snorted, "C'mon, I'm pretty sure Luke finished his volleyball game."

Celestia frowned, Annabeth had always taken a liking to Luke and that had always caused tension between them "Right, let's go see golden boy," Celestia nodded as Annabeth dragged her off to see Luke who was not there.

Annabeth and Celestia had ended up in front of cabin eleven, waiting for Chiron. "Annabeth, Celestia," Chiron said, "I have masters' archery class at noon. Would you take Percy from here?"

Celestia rolled her eyes, "I have a masters archery class to take at noon─"

"Sure, Chiron." Celestia sent Annabeth a look of betrayal.

"Cabin eleven," Chiron told Percy, gesturing toward the doorway. "Make yourself at home." Out of all the cabins, eleven looked the most like a regular old summer camp cabin, with an emphasis on the old. The threshold was worn down, the brown paint peeling. Over the doorway was one of those doctor's symbols, a winged pole with two snakes wrapped around it ─ A caduceus.

Inside, it was packed with people, both boys and girls, way more than the number of bunk beds. Sleeping bags were spread all over the floor. It looked like a gym where the Red Cross had set up an evacuation centre. Chiron didn't go in. The door was too low for him. But when the campers saw him they all stood and bowed respectfully. "Well, then," Chiron said. "Good luck, Percy. I'll see you at dinner." He galloped away toward the archery range.

Percy stood in the doorway, looking at the kids. They weren't bowing anymore. They were staring at Percy, sizing him up. "Well? Don't just stand there like an idiot," Celestia prompted. "Go on." So naturally, he tripped coming in the door and made a total fool of himself. There were some snickers from the campers, but none of them said anything. Celestia announced, "Percy Jackson, meet cabin eleven,"

"Regular or undetermined?" somebody asked.

Annabeth said, "Undetermined."

Everybody groaned.

Luke came forward, "Now, now, campers. That's what we're here for. Welcome, Percy. You can have that spot on the floor, right over there." Luke was about seventeen, and he looked pretty cool. He was tall and muscular, with short-cropped sandy hair and a friendly smile. He wore an orange tank top, cutoffs, sandals, and a leather necklace with five different-coloured clay beads. The only thing unsettling about his appearance was a thick white scar that ran from just beneath his right eye to his jaw, like an old knife slash.

"This is Luke," Annabeth said, and her voice was higher and she was pink. "He's your counsellor for now."

"For now?" Percy asked.

"You're undetermined," Luke explained patiently. "They don't know what cabin to put you in, so you're here. Cabin eleven takes all newcomers, all visitors. Naturally, we would. Hermes, our patron, is the god of travellers."

Percy looked at the tiny section of the floor they'd given him. He had nothing to put there to mark it as my own, no luggage, no clothes, no sleeping bag. Just the Minotaur's horn. "How long will I be here?" Percy asked.

"Good question," Luke said. "Until you're determined."

"How long will that take?"

The campers all laughed. "Come on," Annabeth told Percy. "We'll show you the volleyball court."

"I've already seen it."

"C'mon Percy," Celestia chimed in, grabbing his wrist and dragging him outside, she could hear the kids of cabin eleven laughing behind Percy.

When they were a few feet away, Annabeth said, "Jackson, you have to do better than that."

"What?"

She rolled her eyes and mumbled under her breath, "I can't believe I thought you were the one."

"What's your problem?" Percy was getting angry now. "All I know is, I kill some bull guy-"

"Don't talk like that!" Annabeth told him. "You know how many kids at this camp wish they'd had your chance?"

"To get killed?"

"To fight the Minotaur! What do you think we train for?"

Percy shook his head. "Look, if the thing I fought really was the Minotaur, the same one in the stories ..."

"Yes."

"Then there's only one."

"Yes."

"And he died, like, a gajillion years ago, right? Theseus killed him in the labyrinth. So ..."

"Monsters don't die, Percy. They can be killed. But they don't die."

"Oh, thanks. That clears it up."

"They don't have souls, like you and me. You can dispel them for a while, maybe even for a whole lifetime if you're lucky. But they are primal forces. Chiron calls them archetypes. Eventually, they re-form."

"You mean if I killed one, accidentally, with a sword-"

"The Fur ... I mean, your math teacher. That's right. She's still out there. You just made her very, very mad."

"So, this entire time," Percy said, glaring at Celestia, "I've been thinking that I've gone insane. you knew that she was real?"

"Yeah," Celestia rolled her eyes, "I liked seeing you slowly lose it."

Percy rolled his eyes and turned to Annabeth, "You almost called her something. A Fury? They're Hades' torturers, right?"

Annabeth glanced nervously at the ground as if she expected it to open up and swallow her. "You shouldn't call them by name, even here. We call them the Kindly Ones if we have to speak of them at all."

"Look, is there anything we can say without it thundering?" Percy whined, "Why do I have to stay in cabin eleven, anyway? Why is everybody so crowded together? There are plenty of empty bunks right over there."

He pointed to the first few cabins, and Annabeth turned pale. "You don't just choose a cabin, Percy. It depends on who your parents are. Or ... your parent." She stared at him, waiting for him to get it.

"My mom is Sally Jackson," Percy said. "She works at the candy store in Grand Central Station. At least, she used to."

"I'm sorry about your mom, Percy," Celestia chimed in, she couldn't even imagine losing her stepmother or father, "But that's not what I mean. I'm talking about your other parent. Your dad."

"He's dead. I never knew him."

Annabeth sighed. She'd had this conversation before with other kids. "Your father's not dead, Percy."

"How can you say that? You know him?"

"No, of course not."

"Then how can you say-"

"Because I know you. You wouldn't be here if you weren't one of us."

"You don't know anything about me."

Celestia raised an eyebrow. "No? I bet you one hundred bucks you moved around from school to school, you were probably kicked out of a lot of them."

"How-"

"Diagnosed with dyslexia. Probably ADHD, too."

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"It's a tale-tell sign. The letters float off the page when you read, right? That's because your mind is hardwired for Ancient Greek. And the ADHD── you're impulsive, can't sit still in the classroom. That's your battlefield reflexes. In a real fight, they'd keep you alive. As for the attention problems, that's because you see too much, Percy. Your senses are better than a regular mortal's. Of course, the teachers want you medicated. Most of them are monsters. They don't want you seeing them for what they are."

"You sound like ... you went through the same thing?"

"Most of the kids here did. Did you think I chose to go to Yancy?' If you weren't like us, you couldn't have survived the Minotaur, much less the ambrosia and nectar."

"Ambrosia and nectar."

"The food and drink we were giving you to make you better. That stuff would've killed a normal kid. It would've turned your blood to fire and your bones to sand and you'd be dead. Face it. You're a half-blood." A half-blood.

Then a husky voice yelled, "Well! A newbie!"

They looked over. The big girl from the ugly red cabin was sauntering toward us. She had three other girls behind her, all big and ugly and mean-looking like her, all wearing camo jackets. "Clarisse," Celestia sighed. "Why don't you go polish your spear or something?"

"Sure, Miss Princess," the big girl said. "So I can run you and wise girl through with it Friday night."

''Erre es korakas!" Annabeth said, "You don't stand a chance."

"We'll pulverize you," Clarisse said, but her eye twitched. Perhaps she wasn't sure she could follow through on the threat. She turned toward him. "Who's this little runt?"

"Percy Jackson," Annabeth said, "meet Clarisse, Daughter of Ares."

Percy blinked. "Like ... the war god?"

Clarisse sneered. "You got a problem with that?"

"Given your violent tendencies, and anger issues yeah, I've got a problem with that," Celestia chimed in

"Stay out of it, princess."

"No," Percy said, recovering his wits. "It explains the bad smell."

Clarisse growled. "We got an initiation ceremony for newbies, Prissy."

"Percy."

"Whatever. Come on, I'll show you."

"Clarisse fuck off-" Celestia tried to say.

"Stay out of it, Princess." She did stay out of it, Percy was the new kid. He had to earn his own rep. Percy handed Celestia his minotaur horn and got ready to fight, but before he knew it, Clarisse had him by the neck and was dragging him toward a cinder-block building that he knew immediately was the bathroom.

He was kicking and punching. Hey! At least he tried to put up a fight! Celestia had seen Percy in plenty of fights before, but Clarisse had hands like iron. She dragged him into the girls' bathroom. There was a line of toilets on one side and a line of shower stalls down the other. It smelled just like any public bathroom and Celestia reluctantly followed. Clarisse's siblings were all laughing, "Like he's 'Big Three' material," Clarisse said as she pushed him toward one of the toilets. "Yeah, right. Minotaur probably fell over laughing, he was so stupid looking." Her friends snickered.

Annabeth stood in the corner, watching through her fingers. Celestia just watched, leaning on the bathroom door as she watched, where was all of that macho power when he fought the minotaur?

Clarisse bent him over on his knees and started pushing his head toward the toilet bowl. Then something happened. Celestia heard the plumbing rumble, and the pipes shudder. Clarisse's grip on his hair loosened. Water shot out of the toilet, making an arc straight over his head, and the next thing Celestia knew, Percy was sprawled on the bathroom tiles with Clarisse screaming behind him. She watched just as water blasted out of the toilet again, hitting Clarisse straight in the face so hard it pushed her down onto her butt. The water stayed on her like the spray from a fire hose, pushing her backwards into a shower stall.

She struggled, gasping, and her friends started coming toward her. But then the other toilets exploded, too, and six more streams of toilet water blasted them back. The showers acted up, too, and together all the fixtures sprayed the camouflage girls right out of the bathroom, spinning them around like pieces of garbage being washed away. As soon as they were out the door, Celestia frowned, her socks were wet.

The entire bathroom was flooded. Celestia and Annabeth hadn't been spared. They were dripping wet, but they hadn't been pushed out the door. Celestia was standing in exactly the same place, staring at him in shock. Percy was sitting in the only dry spot in the whole room. There was a circle of dry floor around him. He didn't have one drop of water on his clothes. Nothing. Percy stood up, his legs, shaky. Annabeth said, "How did you ..."

"I don't know."

They walked to the door. Outside, Clarisse and her friends were sprawled in the mud, and a bunch of other campers had gathered around to gawk. Clarisse's hair was flattened across her face. Her camouflage jacket was sopping and she smelled like sewage. She gave Percy a look of absolute hatred. "You are dead, new boy. You are totally fucking dead."

"You want to gargle with toilet water again, Clarisse? Close your mouth." Percy asked

Her friends had to hold her back. They dragged her toward cabin five, while the other campers made way to avoid her flailing feet. Celestia stared at him. Percy couldn't tell whether she was just grossed out or angry at him for dousing her. "What?" Percy demanded. "What are you thinking?"

"I'm thinking," she replied, "That I need to read up on some toilet god I must've missed,"