Sougo sat cross-legged at the center of his dimly lit room with his back facing the sliding doors. His Shinsengumi jacket was draped like a curtain over his slumped shoulders, over a plain white kimono... like the black curtains that would hang over someone's deathbed. Okay, that was a stretch, but the Author just couldn't help but start yet another chapter with a curtain picture.

Maybe it was the weather growing colder as summer turned to autumn, but a chill lingered in the air. It was still too early for the Shinsengumi to turn on the heaters at their Headquarters, but already too cold for comfort.

Sougo sat in silence, staring at the blank wall. He was supposed to spend the time being pensive about the crime he committed, but if he stared at the wall long enough he could see some interesting patterns in the small dents and scratches. He thought he saw the image of a pig whipping Hijikata in a round of S&M play. Just as he was about to double check to make sure—

CRASH!

Kagura kicked through the papery door, sending the entire doorframe crashing to the floor.

Light flooded into the room. She stood at the makeshift doorway, looking down at him with an angry pout on her face and her hands balled into fists.

"Sadist!! I found you!!!" Kagura screamed at him. "Where were you for the last three days?! You avoiding me or something? Give me my egg-on-rice!"

Sougo remained facing the wall in silence, not moving from the spot, not turning around.

"Oi, are you asleep?" Kagura furrowed her brows. "You gotta keep your promise, yes?"

Kagura stared at him. She wasn't sure why, but he looked much smaller, much weaker than the sadist she knew. This wasn't the man who could match her in every fight. This wasn't the man she considered her equal in strength. She thought he'd only been hiding from her so he didn't have to give her food, but she couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong. Something terrible had happened and she didn't know what.

Sougo straightened his shoulders but didn't turn his head. "Hey Chinagirl..."

He sounded like he wanted to tell her something important but his voice trailed off. Kagura waited for him to speak but he stayed mute.

"What?" said Kagura irritated by his silence.

Sougo remained with his back to her. "You owe me ¥314,159 for the food."

Kagura's face twisted in disbelief. "Huh?!! It wasn't free?!"

He looked to her, turning his head just a little so that she wouldn't see most of his face. His mouth curled up into a mean smirk. "When did I ever say it was free, you idiot?"

"But— But—" Kagura stammered as she tried to come up with the meanest words she could think of. "Fine, you... you POOPY SADIST!!! I-I'm never eating your food again! We're breaking up, got it?!"

Sougo went back to staring at the wall like it didn't matter. "Then get out of here... poopy Chinagirl."

Kagura balled her hands into fists. "I will, poopy sadist!"

She turned and stormed away, stomping her feet with every step.

Sougo watched with his large crimson eyes as she disappeared around a corner. He smiled with just a hint of sadness on his face.

"So this is how we part ways, huh?" He closed his eyes and chuckled.

The side of his face throbbed in pain. He placed his hand over the stitches on his lip and the dark bruise across his swollen cheek.

The interrogation had lasted three days before they let him come back to the Shinsengumi Headquarters. When the Melissan Captain saw him on the first day of the interrogation, he did only one thing before leaving the room. He punched Sougo in the face so hard that his chair smashed into splinters against the wall. The Vice-Captain did things much slower. Worse things.

Sougo remembered the bright glare of the interrogation lamp shining into his eyes, the water filling his lungs every time they shoved his head into a toilet bowl, and the cold damp walls as they locked him in the room in complete darkness. The Melissans tortured him with almost as much sadism as he would torture someone. Almost. They lacked the creativity to come up with methods that were less cliché.

The interrogation was all for finding out why he killed that stupid Overseer. It's because he got on my nerves, that's all. He had already told this to them many times, but it seemed they didn't like his answer. The Melissan Vice-Captain even told him they wouldn't punish him if he was only following orders. What a tempting offer. 

Voices came from outside— one mayo freak and one Melissan. They stopped at the newly renovated doorway of Sougo's room.

Hijikata wore bandages over his forehead and his arm was in a sling. The black-balled Melissan who stood beside Hijikata had gray eyes that gleamed like ice and a sharp pixie-face. Vice-Captain Cassero had come in person.

Cassero stared at the splintered wood laying on the ground that used to be the door. "You do understand that your Commander will be punished by death for his incompetence if the criminal escapes, do you?"

Hijikata glared at the Melissan through hooded eyes. "He's still here."

Hijikata stepped into the room. He stopped by Sougo side but only stared ahead. Smoke rose from the tip of his cigarette.

"Get up. It's time."

Sougo only chuckled. "They've finally made up their minds? So what is it? Will I have to kill myself, or will they do that for me?"

Hijikata turned around and headed to the door without an answer.

"Let's go."

***

Sougo made his way down a wooden patio along the edge of the courtyard. Hijikata walked beside him, not speaking a word to him or even making eye contact. A dozen black-balled Melissans surrounded them, led by Cassero.

The Headquarters were quiet. Sougo looked up at the sky, flaming magenta as the sun set behind the clouds. Everyone was probably still out on patrol. Only the higher-ups were supposed to know about what happened to that piece of ham they called Overseer.

Sougo passed by the training hall. He glanced to the side secretly behind his bangs at a katana in the middle of the training hall. It sat on a stand in its black lacquered sheath just waiting for him to take it. How easy would it be to make a mad dash for the weapon? All he needed was a sword. He wasn't even handcuffed. The Shinsengumi Vice-Commander should know better than to escort a criminal with so little security. He was making it too easy to escape.

No, it was almost like he was letting him escape. That bastard. He knew Sougo wouldn't do it. Like this, it would be Sougo's own choice not to get away and he could sleep free of guilt. What a sneaky bastard.

Sougo's thoughts were interrupted by a sudden clatter as the Melissans around him held up their Beam Sabers. He wondered what could have alarmed them. He was only imagining his escape, not acting on it.

He turned his head and saw, filling into the courtyard, a crowd of men dressed in Shinsengumi uniform... all from his First Squad. They stood before him, feet planted firmly to the ground, facing the Melissans with eyes burning with determination as they held up their swords.

The Melissans lit the glowing blades of their Beam Sabers and stood ready to charge at the slightest trigger.

Sougo surveyed the faces of his men with round innocuous eyes despite the tense atmosphere. Swirly-Glasses stood front and center leading the revolt with fiery passion. Kumanaku was nowhere to be seen.

Sougo sighed. "Aren't you guys supposed to be on patrol? If you wanna play hooky, don't hang out at the Headquarters. At least go slack off in a park or something."

"Commander Okita!" Kamiyama drew a second sword from his waist. "Give us your orders! We're ready!"

He tossed the sword to Sougo. Sougo caught it in his hand, a fine katana with a red hilt— his Kiku-ichimonji RX-78.

"The First Squad has the highest mortality rate in all of the Shinsengumi," said Kamiyama. "We joined prepared to die. We followed you through all those battles, Commander Okita... And we'll follow you anywhere!"

Sougo only stood there, head lowered in silence as shadows hanged over his poker-face. His sword hanged limp at his side. With this sword, he could fight his way out. That was easy... And then what? What about his Gorilla Commander? His lips curled up and a chuckle escaped his throat.

"Cut it out with this bullshit... Your Commander is Gori-san." Sougo shook his head in disappointment. "There ought to be a new Shinsengumi Regulation where everyone has to know the Commander's name."

"C-Commander Okita..." Kamiyama's voice wavered, but he stood his place. "Who's Gori-san?"

The Melissans glared at the rebelling Shinsengumi members but Cassero had not yet given the order to attack. Cassero watched, waiting with an amused smirk on his face for the Shinsengumi to draw first blood. The Space Patrol couldn't be blamed for wiping out the entire First Squad in "self-defense".

Hijikata stood silent, leaning against the wall with a dark look in his eyes, but he did nothing to stop them. If no one stopped them, the confrontation would really boil over into a battle they couldn't win regardless of the outcome of this fight.

Sougo stared at the sword in his hand. His reflection on the blade stared back at him, a tired young man with dark bags starting to form under his eyes. He didn't get enough sleep in the last few days. The cold hard floor of the interrogation room and those Amanto yelling at his face really made it hard to fall asleep. What he'd give for a nice long nap...

In the silence, you could hear a pin drop. He loosened his grip and let the katana slip from his fingers. The silver blade crashed to the floor with a deafening clatter.

The Melissan officers wasted not a second to tackle him to the ground, pressing him against the floorboards and pinning his arms behind his back. The other Melissans rushed over to subdue the members of the First Squad.

Sougo looked back at Hijikata as the Melissans forced him violently to his feet. The mayo bastard only watched with cold eyes.

"Hijikata-san~, I need you to understand this." Sougo glanced over to his squad members who fought a losing battle against the Melissans. "All of the men who came today are stupid samurai who don't know how to use their brains properly. You better lock them up for a while... and make sure they don't get their hands on anything sharp."

"Only someone with an empty head like yours could lead a squad like that." Hijikata looked down at him with his cigarette clenched between his teeth. "Hurry up."

He turned his back to Sougo and kept walking.

***

Sougo entered the main office of the Shinsengumi Headquarters with Cassero walking next to him.

Hijikata didn't go in. He slid the door shut behind them. Sougo could hear the wooden floorboards creaking as Hijikata walked away. Asshole, not even trying to act like he cared.

Matsudaira and Kondo sat facing him; Matsudaira with a bored look on his face, and Kondo... Why did hurt so much to see him? Kondo only stared at the ground with his face twisted in pain. It wasn't like he was the one being punished.

The room had an air of solemnness like someone had already died. The light seeped in, filtered by the papery walls. A white cloth was spread across the wooden floor and on it laid a naked blade wrapped in paper.

So it's seppuku... But it didn't really matter. Whether this or execution, dead was dead.

A black-balled Melissan knelt at the side of the room, dressed in the black and yellow uniform of the Space Patrol. A video camera sat on the floor in front of him. The Melissan Captain watched from the other side of that cold glaring lens.

Sougo sat down at the center of the room, staring at the blade in front of him. Cassero went over beside the black-balled Melissan and watched with his arms crossed.

Smoke from Matsudaira's cigar filled the room. The silence lingered like a fog that made the air too thick to breathe.

The silver blade gleamed in the dim light, reflected in Sougo's crimson eyes. His mind still raced for a way out.

Something was missing. Where was his executioner? You know, the guy who was supposed to put him out of his misery after he stuck that fucking blade into his stomach? Surely they wouldn't make Kondo-san do it.

"You really can't stop making my job harder than it already is, can you?" Matsudaira broke the silence. "I told you guys not to cause any trouble. Just look at the mess you made."

Sougo raised his eyes and his lips curled up into his usual snarky grin. "When you told us that, you pretty much jinxed it."

Matsudaira gave a tired sigh. "There's no getting out of this one. You know that?"

"Hijikata-san must be celebrating~."

Matsudaira stared at him. The ashes crumbled from his cigar. "So you haven't heard... You really should have trained your men to follow orders better. When your Vice-Commander woke up, some stupid officer from your squad told him about you."

"Training won't work," said Sougo, stating a fact. "You can't teach a guy who's stupid enough to ask that Mayo bastard for help. You simply can't."

Matsudaira chuckled, more pissed than amused. "You know what your Vice-Commander did? He pulled out his IV and almost died, but when he managed to get out of the hospital, he broke into the Melissan Embassy like he's some kind of Joui terrorist. The guards tried to stop him, but he fought his way right into the room where I was trying to have a diplomatic meeting with those Melissans! That fool... He actually got down on his knees and begged them to spare your life."

"He did something like that...?" A sadistic gleam appeared in Sougo's eyes. "Dammit, should have taken a picture of it."

"Don't worry. I got that for you." Matsudaira reached into his coat pocket and took out his cellphone.

Sougo stared at the photo on the screen. Hijikata was on his knees, forehead against the marble floor at the feet of a stern-looking Melissan.

A wide grin stretched across Sougo's face. "What's wrong with that guy? All those times, he tried to make me commit seppuku, and when it could finally happen, he tries to stop it."

"The guards had to drag him out kicking and screaming," said Matsudaira with a laugh. "That was quite a scene."

Sougo couldn't help but laugh as he imagined Hijikata's humiliation. The air seemed to feel lighter and easier to breathe.

The Melissan Vice-Captain interrupted their laughter with a cough. "Captain Drakanator would prefer that we hurry up."

Sougo's smile disappeared.

Matsudaira glared at the Melissan. "Tell your Captain he should go take nice long a dump."

"Captain," Cassero spoke into the video camera. "The Head of the National Police advises you to take a dump."

Matsudaira turned to Sougo. His face became serious. "Is there anything else you'd like me to do for you? But nothing too difficult though. I already have enough work 'cause of you."

Sougo stared at the blade with his expression hidden in the shadows. He tore his gaze away from it and looked to Kondo. His Commander knelt, eyes squeezed shut in silence the entire time, about to burst into tears any second.

"Can I make one request?"

"What is it?"

"I don't want Kondo-san to see this."

Matsudaira stared at Sougo with his dreary eyes. He turned to Kondo and motioned to the door with a tilt of his head. "Get out."

Kondo got up without raising his eyes, as if he was a robot just following instructions. He walked towards the door, staring at his feet with a numb look on his face. He stopped beside Sougo, unable to take another step, but remained mute.

Sougo turned to him and gave his usual carefree smile. "Kondo-san~, I'll be just fine. The Shipping Tournament hasn't even started yet, so the story's not ending anytime soon. Even that sadistic koala wouldn't kill me off this early. That's if she still wants people to read this stupid fanfic."

Kondo couldn't meet his gaze. "I... I... gave the order to—"

"Shut up!"

Kondo stared at Sougo, stunned at his sudden outburst.

Sougo stole a glance at the Amanto's video camera. "The apology you ordered me to write, I already wrote it. Everything else, I did by my own free will. There's no need for both of us to take responsibility, you understand?"

Kondo's face scrunched up and rivers started streaming from his eyes and nose.

Sougo's expression softened at his Commander's tears.

"A commander shouldn't worry about small things like this. Leave the details to men like me." He stared at Kondo with clear and unwavering eyes. "Go... and be the gorilla the Shinsengumi needs."

Kondo buried his face in the palm of his hand and his entire body shook from uncontrollable sobbing. He walked out of the room with brisk steps, unable to look back. With a clack, he closed the door behind him.

Sougo let out a sigh. "I could have been a good actor."

"You did do a bit of over-acting at the last line," Matsudaira pointed out. "But it's the Author's fault for the cheesy script. It's usually the script's fault..."

Sougo stared at Matsudaira. Keep talking. Keep talking so it he wouldn't have to do it yet... but in the end what had to happen still had to happen. What was the point of dragging this out any longer?

"There's really no way out, is there?"

Sougo reached for the dagger, but paused. Why all the hesitation? This wasn't like him. He curled his long slender fingers around the paper-wrapped blade.

The steel glowed eerie in the dim light. It had a good sharp edge.

"A finger."

Sougo raised his head and looked to Matsudaira in surprise.

Matsudaira started laughing at him. "I really got you there, didn't I? You thought I'd let my strongest swordsman die just like this?"

A grin stretched across Sougo's face. "Who do they think we are? The yakuza?"

"The Captain of the 44th Fleet wanted you beheaded," Matsudaira explained. "It's their Admiral who came to this agreement and saved your life."

"The Melissan Admiral?" Sougo paused in thought. "So they don't want to make a big incident out of this and hurt their relations with us? No... it couldn't be just that..."

Sougo smiled when he realized what must have happened. "Damn, my plot-armor's stronger than I thought..." he muttered under his breath.

Matsudaira shrugged. "Who knows what those Melissans are thinking? They ordered this as punishment and that you be discharged from the Shinsengumi on the grounds of mental illness... Not that you're actually crazy or anything... well you kinda are, but it'll be easier to bring you back if you're just on sick leave."

"Forced sick leave and..." Sougo stared at his hands, silent for a moment. "I'm not sure which one's worse... And the jail time?"

"None. We're putting you through the Ludovico Technique*. That okay with you?"

[*A social conditioning technique from A Clockwork Orange that involves showing lots of violent videos to somehow make the patient averse to violence]

"I'll have fun~," said Sougo with a snicker.

Now for the appetizer of this meal... Sougo stared at his left hand, curling and uncurling his fingers. There should probably be a trigger warning somewhere around here.

"You don't have to do it yourself," said Matsudaira.

Sougo flashed a sadistic grin. "Who else knows how to cut off fingers better than I do?"

He pressed his palm against the floor and held the blade tight with his other hand until his knuckles became white. A bead of sweat streamed down his face, dripping onto the cloth.

With one smooth stroke, a slash of bright red splattered across the white canvas. A numb gut-wrenching pain shot up his arm. The blade clattered against the wooden floorboards. His severed pinky sat in a puddle of sticky liquid.

Sougo curled up, clutching the throbbing stump as blood spilled out between his fingers. He clenched his teeth so that his scream wouldn't escape his lips. His face twisted in agony but he didn't scream. His tears stung his eyes but he didn't scream. The people outside this room didn't need to hear him.

The corners of Sougo's lips wouldn't stop twitching. It curled up into an unmistakable grin as sweat and tears dripped down his face. His sobs sounded more like laughter.

***

Character Complaint Corner

Author: Hi! The Character Complaint Corner is back! This time, the complaint comes from... Okita Sougo! Now Sougo, I guess there really is a lot for you to complain about. First you had to do that completely OOC love confession, then you almost crossed the line when you wanted to try BDSM with Kagura, then you had to get hurt so badly in those fights and kill someone who had a backstory, and now you lost a finger. And I guess you were kinda out-of-character more than once when you had to say those cheesy lines. So which one is it?

Sougo: None of the above~. Hijikata-san shouldn't be alive, that's all.

Author: What?!! How badly do you want him dead? Even after he begged to save your life?! What's wrong with you? This complaint is invalid! Invalid!!!

***

Next time: Finally, the curtain falls on the serious arcs. Everyone's tired. Even I'm tired. Reading them must be tiring too... Phew!