A/N: I've got good news and more good news. Which one do you want to hear first?

Ok, the good news is that Gintama* is now being translated into Vietnamese by Marimo267

This means, I'm now one step closer to my goal of world domination! Muhahahaha! If you'd like to help me take over the world by translating this fanfic into another language, feel free to PM me :)

The other good news is that I'm finally done my exams, so hopefully I could get back to the regular update schedule of a chapter every week.

Alright, I'm done talking. Here's a reeeeally long chapter for you...

***

A black cat walked along the windowsill, nimble and silent.

The sky was gray as if about to rain. Sougo sat on a hospital bed watching the cat through the window. It turned to Sougo with unblinking golden eyes that had slit pupils. Sougo stared back at it with eyes hooded in boredom.

The three Yorozuya and their giant dog, who were here a moment ago, had left to buy more snacks after Kagura ate everything. When they went away, they took with them the rowdy bickering and fighting that made staying in the hospital bearable and left behind only silence. Sougo sat alone in this lifeless room with a bandage over his nose and an IV in his wrist, wishing they'd hurry up with their grocery shopping and come back.

Footsteps echoed against the floor and stopped beside his bed.

"Tell me who broke your nose," someone demanded in a cold voice.

Sougo turned his head to see a man standing beside his hospital bed about the same age as Gintoki. He had wavy black hair tied back loosely, and wore a Shinsengumi uniform just like what Sougo used to wear.

"Denami-san~, it's just a lover's squabble," said Sougo with a grin. "My girlfriend punched me for drooling on her, so I'll punch her back later."

Denami's expression softened with warm smiling eyes— golden like the cat.

He glanced at the transparent fluid dripping down the tube connected to Sougo's wrist. "I don't believe the treatment for a broken nose involves an IV."

"It doesn't," Sougo admitted.

Denami sat down on a chair and flipped through the pile of unfilled hospital forms on the nightstand.

He reached into his coat pocket and paused. "Ah, I think I left my pen back in my office."

"Watch this," said Sougo with a gleam in his eyes. "Kiyomitsu-chan~, come here."

The sword leaning against the wall floated up and shapeshifted into a small one-eyed octopus. It zipped through the air with a squeal and landed on Sougo's lap.

"Turn into a pen." Sougo talked to his pet incubus like telling a dog to play a trick. "You know, the thing that's like a sword, but less pointy so you could poke people without killing them."

Kiyomitsu paused for a second as if unsure. He proceeded to elongating himself into a cylindrical lump of flesh shaped exactly like... a dick.

Denami raised his brows. "Impressive... But I don't think I can write with it."

"I guess he doesn't know what pens look like yet. He's still a kid." Sougo turned to Kiyomitsu and spoke in the tone people use when speaking to young children. "You know what I look like, right? How about you shapeshift into a statue of me?"

The penis stood up and grew sandy brown hair on top. Sougo narrowed his eyes at him, insulted.

He let out a disappointed sigh and grinned. "Kiyomitsu-chan~, how can you be so good at turning into a sword, but so bad at everything else?"

Kiyomitsu made a whining sound.

"What? You got expelled from Shapeshifting School 'cause you only knew how to turn into dicks?"

"I believe he must be a savant." Denami examined the dick. "There are many geniuses who slipped through the cracks of conventional schooling and never got recognized for their talent until much later. This truly is an exceptional penis."

Without warning, the door to the hospital room swung open.

The three members of the Yorozuya stood at the doorway carrying grocery bags. They had just come back from buying snacks.

They all stared at the stranger who was staring at the penis on Sougo's lap. A long moment of silence passed by as they stood frozen in place, unable to register what they were seeing. Kagura and Shinpachi's jaws dropped open to the floor. Shinpachi's eyes started bleeding and Kagura screamed and fired her umbrella at them, riddling the room with bullet holes. Gintoki looked ahead with deadfish eyes, understanding the situation. He shut the door.

When they opened the door again, Kiyomitsu had turned back into a sword. The Yorozuya looked normal, as if they had seen nothing— Kagura and Shinpachi with bright smiles and Gintoki with deadfish eyes. The two younger Yorozuya members had supressed the traumatic memory into the deepest regions of their subconscious.

Denami stood up and bowed towards them at a ninety degree angle.

"Everyone~, meet my plot-armor Denami-san," said Sougo, putting away his sword.

"It's an honor to meet you. I'm Sougo's dad."

"He's into daddykink," Sougo explained.

Denami sniffled, hurt by Sougo's words. "If there could be a day when you'd finally call me Otousan, you don't know how happy I'd be..."

"Sadist! I know you got a sister complex, but daddy issues too?!"

Sougo glanced to Kagura. "I told you, he's not my dad. He's just my plot-armor~."

"Oi, what's your name again?" Gintoki started picking his nose. "Yamanami? How many mountains* was it?"

"Two mountains," said Denami with a polite smile.

[* Yama (山) means mountain. De (出) means to exit. Yamanami Keisuke was historically a member of the Shinsengumi]

Just then, Sadaharu strolled into the room with round innocent eyes and his pink tongue sticking out.

"Ah, you must be his new boss Sakata-dono." Denami hurried over to Sadaharu and bowed before him, shaking his paw. "My little fox told me so much about you, you'd be surprised how much he looks up to you. Please take good care of him as he's still young and immature and doesn't know how to care for himself yet, and if he causes any trouble, do let me know. Can you make sure to feed him lunch and dinner and take him on walks every day?"

"I'm not a dog!!" Sougo and Gintoki screamed at him at the same time.

Sadaharu started sniffing Denami. He tilted his head, curious.

"Sadaharu," Kagura called out. "Don't eat him, okay? He's bad for you."

Sadaharu sat down and started wagging his tail.

"Ayayaya, forgive me, but I didn't bring any treats today. Next time, I promise." Denami gave Sadaharu pat on the head.

Gintoki stared at the scene with eyes twitching in horror. "T-That damn dog likes him?! He actually likes him!! That guy must be some kind of god!"

***

The members of the Shinsengumi sat cross-legged, row after row on the floor of their main meeting room. A banner hanged down across the ceiling, and written on it was: Annual Shinsengumi Employee of the Year Award Ceremony.

Tetsunosuke sat beside Hijikata in the front row watching the ceremony with beautiful sparky eyes like a shoujo character, despite having a potbelly and a buzz cut. This was his first time being a part of this ceremony and he hoped his Vice-Commander would win. In his year at the Shinsengumi, he had seen his Vice-Commander work harder than anyone, often staying up late into the night to get all the paperwork done and not once did he slack off or go out drinking with the other members.

Kondo stood at the podium squinting at a cue card and speaking into a microphone. "...and the Employee of the Year award goes to a true samurai who upholds the Shinsengumi spirit, whose work has made an impact that was way beyond what was expected! Even just a few weeks ago, he was able to resolve the Shower Crisis that threatened bring an end to the Shinsengumi. With his help, we've installed a hundred new shower stalls and completely eliminated the lineup! That's just one example of what he's done for us. If it weren't for his many contributions throughout the years, there's no way we could have come this far. He is our talented Vice-Commander..."

Tetsunosuke looked to Hijikata with eyes glimmering in pride and anticipation. Hijikata's eyes remained hooded in boredom as he sat with a cigarette hanging from his mouth.

Kondo cleared his throat. "Denami Keisuke."

"Wait... WHO?!!!" Tetsunosuke looked around frantically but no one else seemed surprised at all.

Kamiyama, the bookish-looking First Squad member with swirly glasses, got up and walked over to the podium. He explained something to Kondo before collecting the award: a blue ribbon that said 1st Place on it and a coupon for a free platter of sushi.

"Such a hardworking guy," Kondo spoke into the microphone and laughed. "Denami-sensei is so busy in meetings with Totsan and the others that he doesn't even have time for his reward!"

With that, the ceremony came to an end. Everyone got up and grumbled about going back to work. Hijikata left the room, pissed off that he had to sit through this pointless ceremony just because he didn't have an excuse like Denami.

Tetsunosuke hurried over to Kamiyama.

"Hey Kamiyama-san, who's that guy I've never even heard of?!" Tetsunosuke yelled with throbbing veins. "Why does he get the ribbon?! It belongs to our Vice-Commander! Isn't that supposed to be Hijikata-san?!"

"We have two." Kamiyama calmly pocketed the award.

"What?!! Since when?!"

"We always had two Vice-Commanders, even 150 years ago in real life."

"No way! How come I didn't know that?! I've been here a whole year! And the readers have been watching Gintama this whole time and Hijikata-san is the only Vice-Commander!"

"I guess it makes sense you haven't met him," said Kamiyama with a shrug. "See, Hijikata's the VP Internal. He's in charge of telling everyone what to do and making sure no one breaks the Shinsengumi Code. Denami-san is the VP External. He's responsible for our relations with government officials and Amanto, so he's always away on meetings. That's why you don't see him around at the Headquarters much."

"Wow! I didn't know the Shinsengumi's corporate structure was that complex..."

Tetsunosuke walked with Kamiyama down the long patio along the courtyard, past a few trees with leaves starting to sprout and the last remaining bits of snow melting away in the nooks and crannies of decorative boulders.

"You should say hi to Denami-san if you ever get the chance," said Kamiyama with a fond smile. "He's a really nice guy and a real samurai on top of that. In fact, I wouldn't be here if it weren't for him."

"What do you mean?" Tetsunosuke tilted his head, eager to hear a story.

Kamiyama sat down at the edge of the deck and Tetsunosuke sat beside him. The wooden boards were warm under the sun.

"Well, I've had a few other jobs before I started working here..." Kamiyama looked into the distance and a flashback filled the screen.

***

Flashback: 5 years ago

Kamiyama stood holding an umbrella at the corner of the sidewalk in the pouring rain. He wore a fluorescent orange vest over a plain white kimono and had a friendly smile on his face as this was his first day on his new job.

It was a nice residential area. The houses lined the street with tidy front yards and some trees here and there. Once in a while, a train would rumble past in the distance, but the neighbourhood was otherwise quiet.

In the afternoon, children would walk home from Temple School, most of them chattering in groups and a few of them alone. They all wore bright yellow raincoats and held colorful umbrellas. When they reached the crosswalk, Kamiyama would cross the street with them holding up a stop sign so if any car failed to stop, it would hit him first before it could hit the children.

By dusk, most of the kids had gone home and Kamiyama was about to call it a day. A young boy walked over about to cross the street. He didn't have a raincoat or an umbrella and was dripping wet in the rain. A bruise on his face made his cheek swollen and he had a booger dangling out his nose.

Kamiyama crouched down until he was eyelevel and looked to him through his swirly glasses. "Where's your umbrella, kid?"

The little boy sniffled. "The big kids took it."

Kamiyama smiled and offered his own. The boy cheered up as he took the umbrella.

The rain poured down on Kamiyama, completely soaking his clothes by the time they crossed the street.

The wet sleeves of his kimono clung to his skin, becoming see-through and revealing the intricate tattoos that covered his entire arm like a sleeve of colorful patterns.

The kid stared in awe. "Uncle, someone drew pretty pictures on you."

"That's right." Kamiyama rolled up his sleeve so the kid could take a better look.

Among the many symbols in his tattoo was a katana blade that stretched along his forearm with two circular lotus leaves at the hilt near his elbow.

"Shozo-chan!"

The boy's mother came charging down the sidewalk, splashing through the puddles.

When she finally reached him, she pushed her son protectively behind her and furrowed her brows at Kamiyama's tattoos. She glared at Kamiyama, murderous like a mother bear defending her cub.

"Let's go, Shozo. You shouldn't talk to people like him."

She dragged the boy away, not slowing down even when he dropped his umbrella in the water. Kamiyama stood silent as the rain poured down on him.

***

The food cart under the bridge lit up at night and casted a lonely glow into the river. It was quiet by the riverbank, save for a few drunk hobos wandering around and some stray cats scavenging for food. The sounds of nightlife could be heard from the Kabuki district nearby— the chatter of pedestrians among the neon signs, the hollering laughter of people drinking in the bars, and the beeping of cars stuck in traffic. The streets were busy even when the rest of the city went to sleep, but the food cart always had space on the bench.

That evening, Kamiyama sat hunched over the bar, slurping a bowl of ramen noodles. A gruff old man who was the owner of the food cart was busy taking orders from a new customer.

"Two servings of takoyaki, please. To go," said the new customer, a tall young man with wavy black hair. He wore strange clothes, a dark velvet jacket and trousers like what an Amanto would wear, but he spoke fluently and seemed human.

Kamiyama finished up his noodles. They were greasy but enough to fill his stomach. Steam bellowed from the broth boiling on the stove, keeping this place warm. He swirled his glass of cheap sake.

"Hey sensei, how hard is it to open you own food cart?" Kamiyama asked the owner.

"Well, you'll need a licence and they'll do background checks for that..." said the old man as he prepared the takoyaki. "Unless you open one under a bridge."

Kamiyama sighed. "Is there no way for someone like me to make an honest living? Maybe the only place left for me is to go back to my old life, back to fighting battles without honor and humanity..."

"Are you looking for employment?" The other customer Denami turned to him with a friendly smile. "I believe they're hiring where I work."

Kamiyama shook his head. "I should tell you why I got fired from my last five jobs before you guys do the same."

He showed Denami his tattoos.

Denami only smiled a gentle, accepting smile. "Those are beautiful tattoos. Would you like to see mine?"

He turned around and brushed aside his hair to reveal the symbol of a crow tattooed on back of his neck. 

"You're not the only one with a past you wish you could forget."

"Your takeout." The food cart owner handed over a plastic bag with two cartons inside.

"Thank you," said Denami with a bow before he turned to leave.

"Wait." Kamiyama turned to him. "Where is this place you work?"

"The Roushi— Ayaya, they've just changed the name... The Shinsengumi."

End of flashback

***

"...It's only because of Denami-san that I got the chance to meet a great samurai like Commander Okita," Kamiyama concluded. "If it weren't for him, if it weren't for the Shinsengumi, I'd be sleeping with the fishes by now!"

Tetsunosuke sat on the porch beside Kamiyama, having listened intently to the flashback. The warm wind of spring carried the scent of recent rain.

"Denami-san sounds like such a good person," said Tetsunosuke after some thought. "How did he even become a Vice-Commander? I mean, don't you have to be demonic to become a Shinsengumi Vice-Commander?"

"I'm not too sure about it. When I started working here, he was already Vice-Commander." Kamiyama stood up and dusted off his uniform. "Saito-san might know. He's been here a lot longer than me."

***

Tetsunosuke stood in front of Third Captain Saito's room, staring at the closed shoji doors. The sun shined on his back, casting his shadow on the papery panels.

He raised his hand, about to knock, but hesitated. He wasn't sure if he should bother him. He had heard how many traitors this guy had cut down and how he never hesitated when he killed his former comrades. He knew if he made one wrong move in front of him, if he said one thing that angered him, his life would be over.

Tetsunosuke stood in front of the doors. He had to find out more about that mysterious other Vice-Commander. The curiosity became unbearable and before he could change his mind, he knocked on the door.

"Um... C-C-Captain Saito..." Tetsunosuke peeking into the room. "I-I have a question..."

The guy with the orange afro sat in the middle on the room polishing his sword. Saito always wore a ninja mask over his mouth and nose, so no one in the Shinsengumi knew what his face looked like. He raised his gaze and glared at Tetsunosuke with narrow menacing eyes.

Tetsunosuke stared at the blade gleaming brilliant silver. He gulped. "I-I-I just wanna know about Vice-Commander Denami. I heard you know how he became Vice-Commander. J-Just curious. You don't have to tell me if it's top secret. I-I'm just curious, not trying to leak it to enemies or anything. I'm not trying to do anything bad! Please... Please don't kill me!"

Saito put aside his katana and started scribbling into his notepad.

"The Shinsengumi used to be a democracy," Saito wrote. "We had an election and Denami became one of the Vice-Commanderz."

Tetsunosuke's eyes widened in surprise, forgetting his fear. "The Shinsengumi? A democracy?! How did that turn out?"

Saito stood up, looming over Tetsunosuke with sinister shadows hanging over his face. Tetsunosuke took a small step back in nervousness.

"Back a minute." Saito held up his notepad before going into an inner room.

A few minutes passed by. Tetsunosuke stood at the doorway with trembling legs. He wondered what Saito was up to. Could he be sharpening his swords, preparing to kill him? Or maybe he just had to take a dump. He looked around for anyone who could help him, but no one was around. He couldn't run away. Saito would hunt him down. So Tetsunosuke stood there petrified in fear, waiting for his impending doom.

Saito came out with a neat stack of paper and handed it to Tetsunosuke. He had written an entire book to answer the question.

Tetsunosuke stared at the cover page with the title scrawled in the center: A Divided Shinsengumi

He hurried out of Saito's office holding the manuscript in his arms, glad to still be alive. He hid in the broom closet: a place to read banned books like manga and porn mags where he wouldn't get caught for breaking the Shinsengumi Code.

He sat in the dimly lit storage space among the dusty cardboard boxes and potato chip bags that littered the floor. A flashback filled the screen as he read what Saito wrote.

***

Flashback: 6 years ago

It was election night at the Shinsengumi Headquarters. The candidates running for Vice-Commander sat before the crowd of Shinsengumi members, there to give their final speeches to convince more undecided voters to their side before it was time to cast the ballots.

The polls were tight. Three parties ran for power: the Mayo Party led by Hijikata, the Samurai Party led by Denami and the Normal Party led by a character none of the readers would know. The Mayo Party and Samurai Party were neck-to-neck in the number of supporters, while the Normal Party had virtually none.

Sougo stood at among the voters with members of the Samurai Party holding protest signs behind him that said: Out with the fake samurai! Only real samurai belong here! Sougo had wanted to run for Vice-Commander himself, but Kondo wouldn't let him since he wasn't even legal voting age, and he didn't think people would vote a fourteen-year-old into power anyway. Instead, he propped up Denami as the candidate and became his campaign manager instead.

Hijikata sat on stagewith hooded eyes, waiting for his turn to speak and Denami waited with a calm smile. A mob character stood at the podium speaking before the crowd. He was Captain of the Second Squad Nagakura Shinshichi— one of the normal-looking and forgettable characters who would show up in the background whenever a group of Shinsengumi officers were on screen. He ran for Vice-Commander as the leader of the Normal Party.

No one was really paying attention to him, since he was just a mob character, but he was saying something about tolerance and justice and working together and all the things that normal politicians say when they want people to vote for them.

He stepped off the podium after he finished his speech and Hijikata got up.

Hijikata surveyed the faces of the Shinsengumi members and his expression became serious. "If you vote for me, I'll give you mayo."

Half of the crowd erupted into cheers while the other half booed.

Yamazaki, who was still undecided, turned to the cheering guy beside him with brows furrowed in confusion. "You like mayo?"

"Nope!" The Tenth Captain Harada grinned with a determined look in his eyes. "But even if I barf my guts out from eating too much mayo, I'm still gonna vote for Hijikata! Commander Kondo endorsed him, so we can't go wrong!"

"Hijikata-san!" Sougo shouted with a loudspeaker from the crowd. "Have you heard of mayotoxin? There's this new study that showed if you drink a whole bottle of mayo, you'll die from mayo poisoning! Hijikata-san..." He lowered his voice. "Are you secretly trying to poison everyone?"

"What?! Is that true?!" The officers demanded Hijikata desperately.

"Stop making up conspiracy theories, you bastard!" Hijikata yelled at Sougo. "Commit seppuku for spreading fake news! Seppuku!! If you don't vote for me, it's a crime punishable by seppuku!!"

"Hijikata-san~, only samurai could commit seppuku," Sougo spoke into his loudspeaker. "You're not a samurai, just a farmboy playing make-belief with your sword. Stop talking about seppuku."

Tenth Captain Harada grabbed Sougo by the collar of his kimono and screamed at him. "Commander Kondo is a farmboy playing make-belief with his sword too!! How dare you insult our Commander!!!"

"Kondo-san doesn't count. He's a gorilla," Sougo calmly explained. "But that mayo-addict over there is not a gorilla so he's not a samurai."

"That doesn't matter!" Hijikata yelled in rebuttal. "It doesn't matter if you're born a samurai or a commoner or a gorilla. The Roushigumi isn't a place that cares about class or status. Everyone gets the same amount of mayo here, so we're all equal now! We're all samurai!"

His speech was met by a standing ovation from the Mayo Party supporters. Some of them had tears in their eyes. They had been told all their lives that they couldn't become samurai no matter how hard they tried just because their father was a farmer or a merchant or a hobo. Here was finally a chance to work towards their dreams and break through the glass ceiling of their caste system.

Sougo calmly turned to speak to the supporters of his own party. "Hijikata-san doesn't know what he's talking about~. All of you lost your old jobs and had to go through all that humiliation 'cause the world no longer respects us, but Kondo-san gave us back our swords so we could continue being samurai. Are you gonna let that mayo-addict pull us down to the same level as him? We samurai gotta stick up for each other. We need a Vice-Commander who could represent us, a real samurai like Denami-san, not that imposter over there who's trying to bribe us with mayo."

"Yeah, we don't need fake samurai in the Roushigumi!" Kannensai shouted from the crowd. "You peasants can't even aim properly when you pee! It's all because we got too many lowlifes in here that the Roushigumi gets no respect!"

The Samurai Party held up protest signs and chanted. "Out with the fake samurai! Only real samurai belong here!"

"The Roushigumi has no place for elitists!" a Mayo Party supporter shouted. "Don't think you're so special just 'cause you're from a samurai family!"

"Why don't you go make your own Roushigumi if you're jealous?!" a Samurai Party supporter yelled back. "We don't want you here! You fake samurai are the cause of all our problems!!"

"You know what? I think we should! We should divide this group in two so we don't have to be with those elitists!"

"Let's see how that'll turn out!" the Samurai Party laughed. "You'll come running back for help!"

"Shut up! All of you!" Hijikata screamed into the microphone. "From now on, anyone who talks about splitting the Roushigumi apart will commit seppuku, got it?!!"

The Samurai Party only burst into laughter. "You fake samurai don't even have the guts to commit seppuku!"

"You—" Hijikata was about to draw his sword, but stopped.

Tenth Captain Harada stepped up to the Samurai Party, face boiling red in anger. "Oh yeah?! You think we're not manly enough to do it? Just watch!!!"

He drew his dagger and without hesitation, slashed himself across the waist.

Silence fell upon the crowd. Everyone watched with their mouths hanging open.

Harada bit his lips to stop his tears from overflowing and held his breath until his face turned purple. He fell face-first onto the floor.

"Harada-san!!!" Kondo came rushing over. "Someone call 911— wait, we are the police!"

They hurried him to the hospital in their police car with blaring sirens. Of course, Harada couldn't die in a flashback. The cut wasn't very deep and only needed some stitches.

After that, Kondo cancelled the election and named both candidates as Vice-Commander, completely forgetting about Second Captain Nakakura who also ran.

To prevent their divided beliefs and values from splitting apart the group, the Shinsengumi never voted on anything again. The orders of the Commander and Vice-Commanders were absolute, meant to be followed with no questions asked. That was why they had a million-dollar mayo dispenser in the cafeteria that no one but Hijikata uses, a hundred shower stalls that were almost always empty because supply exceeded demand, and a gorilla as their Commander who spent most of his time being a stalker.

End of flashback

***

Tetsunosuke's gaze remained fixed on the words on the pages as his eyes teared up. "We... We used to have a voice, but we were sheep..."

"Tetsu! What you reading?" Tenth Captain Harada peered over from his manga. He furrowed his brows at Saito's writing. "There ain't any pictures!"

Tetsunosuke stared at the bald-headed Tenth Captain with wide eyes. "Harada-san... Did you really cut your belly open?"

"Yup!" Harada grinned proudly. "Look, I still have a scar!"

He pulled open his uniform to show off the scar across his abs.

"What the hell?!!" Tetsunosuke fell back, staring at the scar with twitching eyes. "You did that to yourself?! You crazy?!!"

Harada pouted in disappointment as he put his clothes back on. "A cherry boy wouldn't get it. It's my badge of honor! Now gimme that." He swiped the papers out of Tetsunosuke's hands and gave him his manga. "A real man can't read something without pictures in his free time! Here, read this instead."

On the cover of the manga was a boy with dark red hair. He dressed in a sky blue haori* with white triangles on the sleeves.

[* the outerwear part of a men's kimono, what the Shinsengumi wore in real life]

"Look at that, Shorty, it's a manga 'bout you!" said Harada with a wide grin. "They turned it into an anime a long time ago, and now they're making a movie!"

https://youtu.be/XTpT3FQIYb4

"I look way better than that version of me!" Tetsunosuke complained. "They made my hair too long and my eyes too small! And why am I dressed so weird in that manga?!"

"That's our uniform!" said Harada with a hearty laugh. "We could've ended up like them if it weren't for Captain Okita."

"What?! Captain Okita came up with our uniforms?!"

"Yup! Y'know we used to be called the Roushigumi? It was not long after we changed the name to Shinsengumi..."

***

Flashback: 5 years ago

The Shinsengumi sat before a blackboard on the sun-speckled gravel in courtyard of their Headquarters. Hijikata stood at the front, drawing a rough sketch of their new uniform with chalk. He presented the design to the group.

"The blue represents the sky and the triangles are Mount Fuji." Hijikata looked to the crowd with hooded eyes. "Any objections?"

The officers stared dispassionately at the blue haori drawn on the board with white triangles at the sleeves. A few of them yawned. None of them really cared.

Yamazaki raised his hand. "Do we really need a uniform? I mean, we'll all have to pay for it, right? I'd rather just wear what I already have."

Everyone nodded in agreement.

"We have a name now, so we're not just a bunch of ronin anymore," Hijikata spoke over the chattering crowd. "If we want to get recognized as a proper police force, we need a uniform 'cause police officers are supposed to wear uniforms. I'll deduct the cost from everyone's salary. We can't go wasting tax-payer's money."

"Good thing I already have one so I won't have to pay for it." Sougo put on a blue haori that he already had, which looked exactly like the one drawn on the board. "It's my bathrobe~."

Sougo in his pajamas:

"That's not a bathrobe!" Hijikata threw the chalkboard brush at Sougo but missed. "It's supposed to be traditional Japanese clothes based on what the 47 Ronin wore!"

"But there's 48 of us." Sougo looked around at everyone who had gathered. "Oh, I know! If you died, it would work."

"Why don't you go and die?!" Hijikata drew his sword.

"Now, now." Kondo held out his hands to break up the fight. "Do you have any better ideas Sougo?"

"How about that?" Sougo pointed at Denami.

"Me?" Denami tilted his head.

The OC Vice-Commander knelt at the back of the crowd, dressed in Amanto clothes consisting of a gold-trimmed jacket over a silk vest with a bunch of lace at his throat. It looked like the uniform that the Shinsengumi would later wear, but everyone was wearing kimonos at that time.

"Amanto clothes are more practical," Sougo told everyone. "Kimono sleeves get caught in machinery real easy, y'know? I wanna be able to shoot Hijikata-san without getting my clothes jammed in my bazooka."

"No way! Why should I make it easier for you to kill me?!"

"Toshi, he does have a point." Kondo rubbed his chin as he examined at the flappy sleeves of his kimono. "It'll be bad if our clothes are too baggy and get in the way when we're catching criminals. And Amanto fashion's in style right now. It's modern and it sets us apart from the Joui rebels."

"I still like the haori better..." Hijikata looked up at the thought bubble forming over his head.

He imagined himself leading a group of Shinsengumi officers all dressed in magnificent blue and white. Their blades flashed under the sun and their sleeves blew in the wind as they chased criminals down the streets of Edo.

"Stop right there, you thug!" Hijikata cornered one of the criminals in an alley. "There's nowhere left to run!"

The criminal who had a head of messy silver hair looked Hijikata up and down with deadfish eyes. His face scrunched up in a mocking smirk. "Oi, are you guys perverts? Running around outside in a bathrobe?!"

The infuriating smile filled Hijikata's vision, unable to get it out of his mind.

"It's not a bathrobe, dammit!" Hijikata clutched his head and screamed. "A perfectly good uniform is ruined now, all because that sadistic bastard put that idea in my head!"

End of flashback

***

"...and that's why we wear Amanto clothes instead of what the Shinsengumi was supposed to wear!" Harada finished with a grin.

The two of them sat in the broom closet on some stacks of cardboard boxes. Rays of light shined in from the small grimy window above the door and the air was filled with dust.

"Captain Okita is close with Denami-san, isn't he?" Tetsunosuke observed.

"Oh, they knew each other waaaay back in Bushu before I even joined Kondo's dojo." Harada smiled in reminiscence. "He was like Sougo's home tutor or something... His teacher."

***

Next time: More flashbacks of the Shinsengumi's past...