━━━━ ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ━━━━

THREE DAYS passed, but the time did little to fix Davina's bruised ego. Her body had stopped aching after the second day, the familiar feeling of bruises bringing her little joy. By the time the next match day rolled around, she had talked herself into beating whoever she ended up against. She had spent a long time in her head, running through everyone based on the matches she watched and the regular training they continued, gauging their threat level and formulating a plan for anyone she was asked to fight.

This included Edward, who she assumed could come up again if initiation went for thirty days. He had hardly talked to her since he had won against her, and she had made no effort to, either. She was somewhat offended that he hadn't tried harder, but she had been getting used to eating meals alone and heading to training on her own. Sometimes Apollo joined her, but it felt more like pity than anything, and she grew annoyed.

Davina was the only one still hung up on the first matches. All anyone could talk about was Christina's discipline, and Eric's cruelty. Molly had boasted that the girl deserved it, and should've taken the beating or gotten up. Davina had only hung her head lower and forced down a meal. Here she was, bruised over one loss when Christina had almost died.

It did not stop the feeling of inadequacy that had returned for the first time since she had left her home Faction. Except this time it did not come from her mother, or the shadow that Viviane cast over her, but herself. She could feel it in her stomach, something dark and angry, beating herself up for losses she hadn't even been through yet, cutting at her knuckles as she continued to train by herself at night. It had killed her appetite and carved dark circles under her eyes, but Davina felt more confident now to face her next opponent and secure a foot in initiation.

The match day had put her in an irritable mood, but she wasn't bothering anyone, at least until he had come over.

"You look lonely," Peter said at breakfast, looking across at her with his forest green eyes.

"I don't need your company," Davina snapped at him.

"Look, nose, when I said you could stop being a third wheel I didn't mean sitting alone," Peter told her. It was only him that morning– he had left his table of lackeys to come over to her. Davina gave him an annoyed look.

"I like being alone," she told him stiffly.

He scoffed. "Liar."

"How would you know?" she challenged.

"I'm Candor," he said simply. "I can see lies."

"Christina told me you're just about the worst Candor out there," Davina retorted.

"Believe what you want," Peter said with a shrug. "I doubt you'll be slow enough to get pinned like her."

Davina sighed. "You flatter me."

Peter only smiled at her, but she stopped complaining and let him sit with her for the remainder of breakfast, sometimes exchanging banter (mainly on his part) and Davina rolling her eyes to the sky. As they left breakfast, Davina was aware of Will's small group of friends looking at them warily, but she decided it wasn't her problem to worry about who liked who.

She still had half a mind to assume Peter was keeping her close as an enemy, but she allowed herself to not be alone as they headed for the training room and the morning matches for that day. Peter was laughing at something Davina said as they entered, but the blonde girl faltered as she saw her best friend looking straight at her.

"Drama," Peter drawled. He patted her on the shoulder gently and split off from her, and under Edward's gaze she grit her teeth and headed over.

"Hey," she greeted her friend, voice strained.

"Hi," he returned. "You alright?"

Davina shrugged. "Just a bruised ego."

Edward still looked annoyed, crossing his arms over his chest. "Is that all?"

Davina defiantly met his gaze. "Yeah. Sorry."

"Good," Edward sighed. "Don't think I've gone so long without talking to you, well, ever."

"Yeah," Davina scoffed. "You're pretty helpless without me."

"You wish," he teased back. "I've got Molly today– need all the luck I can get."

Davina blinked, realising she had yet to check the board for today. She saw her friend's name scrawled next to Molly first of all, and then below saw her own. Drew. Peter's other lackey. Davina shifted her gaze, looking across the room where Peter had been joined by his three friends.

"You'll be fine," Davina said dully, not fully focused.

"You've got this," Edward told her simply. "He lost against Peter the other day, you'll be fine."

Davina only nodded. The rest of their first matches had been largely overshadowed by her loss and Christina's punishment, but she did recall Peter leaving his own friend black and blue in a terrifying display. The pretty boy was clearly capable in a way that she couldn't underestimate.

She ground her teeth; but that wasn't today's problem.

"Okay, wish me luck," Edward said, clapping her on the shoulder as he stepped up to the arena to face Molly, who looked wildly excited at the prospect of fighting Edward.

Davina finally looked at the chalkboard properly, below the first fight. Peter and Tris were next up, and Davina had serious doubts about her being able to win. Peter was the best fighter besides Edward and her, having won against Drew in only five minutes with swift attacks.

Then Will and Christina, both lean and tall. Then Al and Apollo. Davina frowned. Apollo had won against Myra the last time, if only because Myra couldn't even throw a punch to save her life. She had watched the match carefully, and Apollo's sharp and messy fighting style. He was scrawny, too, hardly a threat to someone like Al.

Davina continued down the list. Myra wasn't fighting today, which seemed to suit her as she sat nervously to the side, staring at Edward with her hand to her mouth. Davina looked across the room where Peter's group was, eyes locking onto Drew, her sturdy and redheaded opponent.

He was only an inch or so taller than her, but broad and far heavier. He had lost to Peter easily, as Edward had pointed out, which made Davina believe speed would be her best bet. Her gameplan in her head for him had been to get in quick and fast– but that if he managed to corner or grab her she could be overpowered.

As expected, Edward beat Molly, and she only looked half-conscious as she pulled herself out of the arena. If Davina wasn't so concerned that he had gone easy on her, she would have revelled that Molly got her karma. From across the room, Christina seemed to be enjoying it, but her friend beside her looked pale as a ghost.

Tris might have been ready to throw up as she stood in the arena to face Peter, the boy giving her a smile that Davina recognised as false. Edward had returned to her side, an arm around Myra.

"You okay there, Stiff?" Peter jeered. "You look like you're about to cry. I might go easy on you if you cry." The brunette boy moved into a fighting stance, hands up by his face and knees bent. "Come on, Stiff," he taunted, eyes glinting. "Just one little tear. Maybe some begging."

Both Eric and Four were present for their match, and Davina desperately hoped the latter did not go anywhere this time, as Tris kicked out and aimed to strike Peter in the side. But the boy caught the blow, dragging her forward by her foot and slamming her back onto the floor. Davina watched as Tris scrambled to her feet.

"Stop playing with her," Eric snapped. "I don't have all day."

The mischievous look in Peter's eyes disappeared, and in a flash, he'd struck Tris in the jaw, the blonde girl overbalancing and swaying to the side. She stumbled back, as far as the arena would let her, but Peter was already back in front of her, and kicked her in the stomach, knocking the air from her lungs. She fell.

Tris somehow managed to push herself back up, but it was no use, as Peter was once again already there. He took a hold of her hair in his fist, and with the other one hit her in the nose, blood dripping from her nostrils. He punched her again, this time in the ribs, as Tris weakly tried to claw his hands away.

Peter shoved her to the ground, where Tris coughed, spraying blood dripping from her nose onto the ground. She struggled to her feet, beyond unsteady, and Davina wondered how she was still standing. Peter didn't even need to be quick, as the blonde was clearly too disoriented to be of much use. Peter laughed at her feeble punch, and slapped – not punched – the side of her face, and she was sent sprawling back to the ground.

Davina's eyes glanced away, briefly, to see Four shove the door open and disappear, once again leaving them with Eric, much to the brunette girl's dread. A scream from the arena pulled Davina's attention back, and she saw Tris on the floor, struggling to curl in on herself as Peter drove his foot into her side. And again. And again.

There was a mad look in his eyes now, a sick love for the power, a darkness Davina had not been able to pick up in the mischief he usually just displayed; as he continued to beat Tris while she was down, and Eric remained stone-faced, looking almost bored with the violence, while everyone else stayed silent and afraid.

"Enough!" Davina finally cried.

Eric's eyes snapped to her. He held up a hand, causing Peter to stop kicking Tris, who had gone limp many blows ago. Calmly, Eric walked over to where Davina stood, Edward and the others shying and angling away. It took every drop of strength in Davina not to flinch as the leader stood right in front of her, but she would not show weakness in front of him.

"What did you say, initiate?" Eric asked, coolly.

She met his eyes, cold and icy blue, lifting her chin higher. He dwarfed her 5'4 form. The room had gone silent, anxiously staring at the pair. Eric, who had hung Christina only days before, and was no doubt capable of worse, unsupervised by Four who had pissed off.

Standing up against him further was stupid, and would only make the situation worse. Davina had achieved her goal; Peter had stopped and continuing to beat Tris would make Eric look bad. There was no obvious bravery or strength in kicking someone who was already unconscious.

"Nothing," Davina said.

"What was that?" Eric asked, voice loud enough for the others to hear in the silence.

Davina swallowed thickly, but otherwise showed no outward signs of fear. "I said nothing," she repeated, voice louder and clearer. A few seconds passed, Davina's heart pounding in her ears as she waited for Eric to respond.

"Smart choice," he said, softly, leaning forward so only she could hear. Before she could quiver from how close he got, Eric had shouldered past her, rough enough to throw her off balance.

Once he was out of earshot, Davina let her body relax, and huffed out a breath. If Eric gave first chances, she had definitely just used hers.

"Get her out of the arena," Eric shouted, and Davina saw Al jog over to Tris. "Next up– Will and Christina."

"I thought you Erudite were supposed to be smart," Peter mused as he came up to Davina, cracking his bloody knuckles, which Davina eyed warily. "Standing up to Eric? Not smart."

"I just needed to stop the match," Davina told him, not meeting his eye.

"Why?" Peter scoffed. "Didn't know you were friends with the Stiff."

"I'm not. But there is no bravery in beating someone when they're down, let alone already unconscious," Davina reasoned, but Peter's face was unwavering. "You really enjoyed your fight, huh?" she asked instead, distaste evident in her voice.

"Stiff had it coming," Peter said with a shrug.

"Why? One of your friends is a Stiff. I don't see you vandalising his bed and mocking him at every opportunity," Davina questioned, arching an eyebrow at the boy.

"You act like you've never met him. He's as far from Stiff as I am from Candor," Peter snorted, and however true that was, Davina refused to acknowledge that as an excuse.

Davina only hummed in response, looking at the boy evenly, his dark green eyes lacking the ferocity they had as he had kicked Tris over and over. She thought about the same boy who had been harmlessly flirting with and annoying her all week, a glint of mischief in his eyes and a smirk that didn't meet them, and compared him to the person he had just been in the arena, someone who would do anything to win, for power.

There was a groan from the arena and Davina turned to see Christina on the floor, Will having won already. Her jaw was looking bruised as Will helped her up and out, Davina noticing the gentle way he held her. Peter jeered at them as they passed, but Davina was only stiff, knowing what was coming next.

"Davina and Drew," Eric called, and she swallowed thickly.

"Don't go too hard on him," Peter said, giving Davina a disarming smile.

She merely looked at him, unable to see him the same as she had that morning. Without a word to him, Davina removed her jacket, discarding it on the floor as she headed up, Peter furrowing his brows at her silence when she usually would've bit back.

Davina could feel the pressure on her in that moment; her previous loss eating away at her. She couldn't afford to lose again, especially to someone she assumed was going to be ranked lower in the long run. And especially not in front of Eric now that she had challenged his leadership.

Davina and Drew stood opposite each other, arms raised, knees bent. The floor around them was still dotted with Tris' blood, which the blonde girl tried to ignore. Davina knew she'd be faster than Drew, but she simply couldn't afford to let him get his arms around her. She took a deep breath, before lunging forward and making the first move.

As expected, Drew immediately moved to block her high punch with his arms, which allowed her to drive her knee straight into his ribs, which didn't wind him as much as she would've liked. But in that moment of distraction, the brunette hooked the tip of her shoe behind his knee and pulled forward, tripping the redheaded boy as he stumbled. Davina lightly moved out of the way, putting her out of range of his arms and hands, before coming in and slamming her boot into the side of his face.

She didn't give him time to recover, as he tried to swing around to punch her, Davina blocked and moved past to get into his face again, elbow going for his nose. It struck, and Drew let out a hiss of pain as she disconnected from him, using his shoulder to kick off.

The match was over in a few minutes, Davina's planned technique doing wonders for her. Drew landed two punches on her, and had managed to send her scrambling at one point, but in the end her experience had won out against his solid strength, and she left the arena victorious and far less bruised than the last match.

Slightly out of breath, Davina stepped out of the arena, leaving Drew to be picked up by Molly, his nose still leaking some blood. From across the room, Eric looked at Davina coldly, as he circled her name painfully slowly, but Davina only turned away and stared at the floor.

The first person to come up to her was Edward, grinning down at her in much the same way he had when they were children. "See?" he said, simply. "You're gonna be fine."

But Davina looked at him and didn't feel better. She didn't feel accomplished at all– Drew was an easy target she had been prepared for. She looked at Edward and saw the person she should have been able to beat. Ultimately, when it mattered, he was better than her at the one thing she had always taken pride in.

Well, not the only thing, but she had no art supplies in the dorms right now.

All she had were her fists and the blood running down her lip, and Edward had managed to get her down. Any of their warmth from that morning had disappeared as she looked at him, and he seemed to realise she wasn't taking his praise.

"Thank you," someone interrupted softly.Edward and Davina looked away from each other to see Al had returned from taking Tris to the infirmary.

Davina furrowed her brows as he continued to look at her. "For what?"

"For standing up for Tris," Al said, like it was obvious.

"I didn't do it for her," Davina told him, simply. "It was nothing," she added with a shrug.

Al looked at her oddly. "It wasn't nothing. It was Dauntless."

Davina scrunched up her face at the words, and brushed past him, beelining for the door when Eric called out. "Initiate." Davin paused and looked over her shoulder, freezing when she saw Eric looking directly at her. "You."

She paled, shoulders straightening as the leader headed towards her for the second time that day. He stood above her, looking down his nose, before saying as if through gritted teeth, "Which Faction did you come from?"

The question derailed her, pale green eyes widening. "I– Erudite," she stammered, unsurely.

He only studied her carefully, as if mulling over the answer. Maybe he thought he knew her, maybe he was confused by her aptitude for combat. But she wasn't sure, as he turned away without another word. Davina furrowed her brows but considered herself dismissed.

"Next up, Al and Apollo!"

Al moved off, as Davina glanced to her left, feeling like she was being watched. She saw Peter just briefly turning away from eavesdropping, and she narrowed her eyes at the side of his head.

The last match for the day between Apollo and Al was underwhelming. The former-Abnegation boy was down in minutes, and Al looked horrified at what he'd done, causing Davina to frown. Peter had helped Apollo out of the ring, the boy dazed and spouting off about wheat and belts or something of the sort.

Davina watched Eric circle Al's name in victory from beside a quiet Edward, just as Four finally returned, eyes scanning the initiates still present.

As the initiates began to settle down for lunch, ice packs being handed around and muscles being stretched, Eric moved to the centre of the room. "Before I leave, we're going on a field trip tomorrow morning," he announced.

"A field trip?" Peter scoffed.

"To the fence, to learn about jobs you might one day have," Eric said, sharply. "Or not." Davina's stomach knotted. "If you're not at the train by eight fifteen, we're leaving without you."

"Alright," Four cut in. "Break for lunch."

━━━━ ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ━━━━

THAT DAY, the infirmary held more transfers than the dining hall for lunch, leaving Davina not much choice but to eat with Edward and Myra, the former still quiet around her. Davina wasn't sure how to break the awkward ice that had formed between them, so simply decided not to. She could stay in deep thought over the field trip the next day while Edward and Myra were wrapped up in themselves.

Davina had barely thought ahead to actually living and working in Dauntless. It had only been a week– but the idea of her future still being numbers or medicine or science was stuck in her mind. She hadn't even thought ahead past surviving initiation.

"Are they trying to kill us?" Myra asked, as she delicately ate her sandwich.

"Eric might be," Davina said, dryly, zoning back into the conversation.

"Surprised he didn't do anything to you," Edward snorted, eyeing Davina, who didn't bother responding.

"And what he did to Christina yesterday... oh, god." Myra trembled, looking frightened.

Davina just looked at her, scrawny and incapable of hurting a fly, mouse brown hair half-falling out of its bun and eyes wide as she ate. She would not survive initiation, at least not the combat they'd been doing so far, not like Edward would, and already was.

"I don't like how Four keeps leaving us with him," Edward said sharply. "Did anyone even tell him about the other day?"

"No," Davina replied, simply. "They're scared."

Edward scoffed. "Thought we were supposed to be brave."

"If you wanna snitch on Eric, be my guest," Davina retorted. "There's a very fine line between being brave and stupid."

"Seems like Eric knows that line," Edward said bitterly.

"Helps when you came from Erudite," Davina added.

The look Edward gave her unnerved her, and Davina went back to picking at her food.

After lunch, Myra and Edward stayed quiet except for each other again, and Davina was left staring wistfully at the Dauntless-born table, initiates of their home faction laughing and talking loudly together. They all already looked like they belonged, and Davina didn't doubt their training. Their final ranks were combined with the transfers', so for all Davina cared they also counted as competition.

But there was something in the way they looked so at home, surrounded by each other and thriving amongst like-minded people, that made Davina envious, as she third-wheeled or sat relatively on her own. She bitterly turned away and got to her feet to head back to the training room.

The rest of the day was spent going over other routines they had learnt so far, building on their skills at shooting, fitness and more sessions against the punching bags, until they finished for the day and everybody's muscles ached even more on top of the fights. Davina had managed to expertly avoid everyone irritating her that day so far– Edward, Peter, Al. Even Eric had given them a moment of bliss and left for the afternoon, leaving Davina under the watchful eye of Four as they trained.

Davina's knuckles had turned red from how hard she'd gone at the punching bag, and the colour lingered as she headed down to dinner, knowing she would continue it again later that night. Four hadn't stopped her again since, but she was constantly aware of being caught at night– it wasn't against the rules, but something in his warning had stuck with her.

She had showered until the water burnt her, and ruffled her hair into a frizzy mess, but she didn't care as her knuckles stung on her way to dinner. Most of the transfers were missing again– Tris' group were all absent, most likely visiting her in the infirmary, assuming she was finally awake after the beating Peter had given her. The same went for Edward and Myra, which left Davina sitting alone, at the corner of a table occupied by loud, elder Dauntless members.

Davina glanced up when someone placed a plate down opposite her, and Apollo sat down. He had been in the infirmary since his match, and an ugly bruise was already forming on the skin of his cheek, the one without the scar, giving his face an even more rugged look than normal.

"You look like shit," Davina said before she could stop herself.

Apollo didn't miss a beat. "Thanks. You, too." The girl simply rolled her eyes. "You didn't happen to read a book on hand-to-hand combat, did you?" he asked, cutting into his chicken.

"Studying it since I was ten with Edward," Davina answered.

Apollo looked like he wanted to laugh. "Are there any of you Erudite that learn anything normal?"

Davina sneered at him. "Will calls them morbid interests."

"Well, he's not in a place to brag," Apollo scoffed back.

"I like you," Davina said simply. "Why do you hang out with Peter's crew?"

"Because it's safe," Apollo replied simply. "No one will touch me if I'm with them– and Peter likes me enough."

"Probably cause you're worth more brains than both his followers combined," Davina said dryly.

Apollo laughed. "You're not wrong." He put down his cutlery, leaning forward slightly. "He likes you, too."

"Maybe a little too much," Davina responded, jaw clenched. "He sees me as a threat."

"That'll change as we get further in," Apollo replied, as if his own rank wasn't at stake. Davina wanted to ask him how he stayed so calm while his entire future was at stake simply because he couldn't throw a punch.

"You saying I'm gonna lose?" Davina snipped.

"If you're losing I'm fucked," Apollo replied simply. Davina didn't waste breath falsely reassuring him. "Nah, he'll get over himself. It's still the first week."

"True," Davina relented. Apollo perked up, seeing something behind her. The blonde turned slightly to see Edward and Myra walk right past her and to a different table.

"Trouble in paradise?" Apollo said, lightly.

"No," she replied indignantly.

"You guys are really late," Apollo called over her shoulder, and Davina looked back to see Peter and his crew approaching. "

Davina could only think of both Molly and Peter covered in blood from going too far in the first week, and suddenly sitting at a table with Apollo and his group made her sick to the stomach. He didn't seem to notice her shift, and continued to talk with her as was becoming commonplace, all sarcasm and sneering, until she pushed her seat back and got to her feet.

Some excuse had tumbled from her mouth about not being hungry anymore, and she needed her rest before she was leaving the scene. Peter met her eyes as they passed, and once again Davina was reminded of the look in his eye from that morning, as he gave her a warm smile that she, slowly, ignored.

Initiation makes people dangerous, Four had said.

Davina was inclined to agree.

━━━━ ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ━━━━

writing bitter davina heals apart of me icl, she'll get better and more secure in future but for now she's a sore loser who doesn't really like anyone