Y/N

His love; something I craved since years ago but I buried my desire just because of our friendship. I let go of all my feelings just because he didn't feel the same towards me.

But why would he loved me now?

It was useless. He wasn't alive, and I wasn't sure with my love for him. Perhaps he came back with a reason but that didn't mean that he wanted to love me.

Maybe Tom was just alone, and when he came back, I was there. I was the one who could see and hear him- so of course he fell for me soon or later.

His love wasn't real, at least that was what I needed to tell myself. I loved Sebastian and Tom- No, I couldn't do this. I couldn't love both of them like a bitch. It was wrong, and I won't break their hearts.

But I broke Tom's heart, didn't I?

The thought of hurting him made the tears raced down my face, like they were competiting who will fall on the ground first. I never wanted to hurt him, it was the last thing that I'd do in my life.

"I love you, Y/N."

The magic words echoed on my mind again. The kiss that we shared felt so right and I couldn't help but thought about it. The look in his eyes when I told him that I didn't feel the same- was killing me from inside.

"Why Tom, just why? If you love me since the beginning, we won't be like this."

I whispered to myself, another tear rolled down my cheek. The feelings that were fighting in my chest was unbearable- anger, love, joy; all of them battled to be one but I knew that it couldn't be.

My phone rang, making me groaned. I wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone. But then I remembered it was only Sebastian who would call me this late. I quickly grabbed my phone and I wasn't wrong- It was Sebastian.

"Hello, sweetheart."

He started.

"Hi, Mr Williams. May I help you?"

I asked him in a formal manner, trying to sound cheerful and funny- just to hide my sadness that he could smell from afar.

"Yes, Miss L/N. I need your help."

"With what?"

He chuckled from the other side. I cracked a smile when I heard that.

"I miss you. Can you help me with that, Y/N?"

I guessed that he was smirking, knowing that it was him. I laughed but it sounded bitter and forcefull. I hated myself for sounding like that.

"You know you can tell me anything, sweetheart."

He said out of all sudden. I shook my head- like he could see me.

"You were crying, weren't you?"

He asked. I sighed defeatedly. This man could know everything about me just by hearing my voice. He was concerned. It was one of many things that I loved in him.

"I was. But I'm fine now. Don't worry, Seb."

I assured him.

"If you say so, I don't want to push you. But remember that everything that makes you upset, they'll make you even stronger, Y/N."

His words warmed my heart and I cracked a genuine smile. The tears was dried on my face and my heart finally was beating normally again.

"And if one day you'll ever find yourself helpless, please know that I'm here for you. Take my strength and keep it with you. Because I love you, Y/N L/N."

His voice was comforting, and I hoped he was there with me so I could wrap my arms around him and let him hold me. He made me feel better already.

"I love you too, Sebastian Williams."

"I know."

I chuckled and looked out the window. I zoned out for while before his voice brought me back.

"What about your book progression?"

A dream came true.

"Great. Today I've talked with Thompson and she said that she wanted to make 50,000 copies of it!"

I was so excited, that all of the burden was lifted up off my shoulders for awhile.

"Wow, that's great, Y/N! I told you that you'll be such a huge success."

I grinned and then I heard a sigh from him.

"I'm busy with works lately. I wish I could see you right now."

He groaned in frustration. I just smiled; hoping to see him soon too.

"I'm sure that you're tired, Seb. You only got a few hours of rest now that you've got a new project. You're so busy. I understand if you don't see me often, and with you calling me at this late- aren't you tired?"

I felt sorry for my boyfriend. He worked so hard that he could get in the position that he was in. People thought that being one of the most important people in the company was easy, but it wasn't for him.

"I've never get tired of you, Y/N."

He said, making me blushed crimson. He chuckled under his breathe.

"I'm sure you're blushing right now."

"I'm not!"

"Yes, you are."

I rolled my eyes dramatically even he couldn't see me and contained my laughs.

"And you rolled your eyes."

I mentally facepalmed and bursted into laughter.

"Oh my god, did you set a camera in my room or what?"

He hummed.

"What if I did?"

"Sebastian!"

He laughed and we continued to talk about stuff. I prevented myself from thinking about what just happend with Tom and focused on Seb. It was hard, but Sebastian made it easier.

At least I didn't break his heart like how I did to Tom.