Was this the answer all along?

I wonder.

Is this where I was supposed to end up?

I wonder.

How did I avoid the obvious?

I am surprised.

How did I believe it wasn't worth trying?

I am surprised.

The questions are laid to rest.
No more confusion beyond this place.
The portrait had always been a mess.
It's best when it is colorless.
So I take it in. All in one breath.

Everything is white.

The blood in my veins. Shadows staring at me.
Illusions of the 'could have been'.
and the love of all those who cared for me.

Forgive me. Forgive me.
I am doing this for me.
I chose to be selfish.

I lived for your dreams.
Lived for what you wanted from me.
Now, I am choosing to live for me.

Let me be. Let me be.
Let me go. Let me go.

Let me dream. And never wake up.