Title: Boys of Suburbia

Author: hometowns-

Genre: Teen Fiction

Rating: PG-13

#of chapters: 16

# of chapters I read: 3

Summary/Blurb:

"It's a cold and scary world out there. Find your light and you'll do just fine. "

Two boys from a small suburbia, both wandering in a world they're stuck in, found each other by fate.

But once their personal emotions come intact with their new-found friendship, an indescribable feeling might just bloom on its own, leaving them with something so unsure yet so hauntingly beautiful. 

Summary/Blurb: 

Review:

Cover:

#aesthetics (as are all your other covers, I've noticed)

I like this cover because of that, and because the teenager on the cover does look like a small-town boy. Even though a lot of HS stories take place in suburban areas, making a point of it here shows that they story will mostly revolve around their experiences in living in a small town. Which is great, because we usually only ever get the high school aspect of a teen's life, and really forget about everything else (reality—that not every teen's high school life is saturated with drama)

Even the background looks like the front of a suburban house, and the subtitle "leave the blue neighbourhood" makes me think that the protagonists live in a blue collar area (aka whose parents work labour-intensive jobs. Rather than white-collars, such as office-workers). This is another important factor that is usually overlooked, since for some reason, people like to read about rich kids and their shenanigans. So what about someone in low/middle-class?

Bottom-line, I found this cover very appealing, and it does fit the plotline. 

Blurb:

I was immediately hooked by the opening line, "It's a cold and scary world out there, find your light and you'll do just fine." because not only because of the meaning behind it, but also because you managed to connect this to the rest of the blurb. You didn't just add it in to make the story look "hipster".

The blurb is concise, but without lacking any important information, and despite the fact that it may be a little vague when it comes to the names of the protagonist, this doesn't pull me out of the blurb. The anonymity helps me connect to their situations a little more, since it seems to me that this will be a sort of coming-of-age story. A lot of the plot will revolve around character development and the protagonists relationships between one another, and these are all things which we all experience in life (hence there's no need for specifications).

This may come across as biased, but I'm always a sucker for these type of stories, because they tend to get very philosophical. It's nice to read something that makes you think every once in a while.  

Now, for the story!

First Impression:

The first thought that came to mind was "Woah, the chapters are short!" But after reading through them, they seem to be the right length. There are some things which I think could use a little more development, but I'll talk about these later.

Anyway, the opening of the first chapter was unique and it drew me in as a reader, because it's one I haven't seen before. I found it lovely how patient Andy was with his little sister, and despite taking over 2 hours for her to get the hang of it, he never lashed out her (I could understand why Andy is so proficient at skating, especially since he practically lives nearby. Although I wonder why his sister isn't as good as him. Maybe she wasn't interested in ice-skating?).

Then, with the introduction of Levi, I was immediately given an indication of contrasting personality types between the two boys. Levi seems to be a little imposing, definitely a person with a dominant character, whilst Andy seems to be more compliant, which makes sense if you think about it. Andy's sister is a lot younger than him, hence she's very dependent on him, while Levi's sister is older and can already entertain herself on her own (like when she fiddled around with her phone). 

Through the next two chapters, I saw their friendship begin to blossom, even though they had known each other for only a day. I didn't find that it was rushed or anything, but as I mentioned in the intro of this part, there are some things which could use some work:

a) Head-hopping. I found that this was mostly an issue in the second and third chapters, when you jumped around the characters inner thoughts. Head-hopping is a form of telling, because instead of showing us a person's emotions through their actions, you give it away through their thoughts, or even in the narration.

For example, Lynn's crush on Andy could've easily been shown through her actions. Obviously she's only a kid for Andy, so he wouldn't interpret her blushing, mumbling for anything more than shyness, but I rather find out later that Lynn has a crush on Andy, rather than see it happen before my eyes. Remember that the protagonists are Levi and Andy, not the sisters, so the story has to focus mostly on them. Additionally, I want to be acquainted with Andy a little more—he was the person that started off the story, so there should be a bit of a focus on him rather than immediately panning to Levi (like in the second chapter). 

b) When Andy was teaching Levi to skate, I felt like it was a little too similar to when Andy was teaching Cathy to skate. Change it up a bit—I was half expecting for Levi to misstep and fall over, bringing down Andy with him, so perhaps you could add something along those lines in? (Especially since Levi never skated before)

c) When Andy doesn't want to accept the ride—I thought that it would've been more than just not wanting to incovenience Levi. He just met this boy, and even though they clicked right away, he's still a complete stranger (even though Cathy apparently knows Levi's sister. But I don't you should've mentioned that.), so maybe in his inner thoughts, he should mention something along those lines. 

That's about it, really. The plot was easy to read and follow, and although I only read the introductory chapters, I already have a feeling that things are going to get a little intense further down the line. 

Writing Style:

There weren't any major issues with grammar and punctuation, but because the vocabulary was a little on the simple side, I noticed that you had a tendency to rely on adverbs for dialogue tags and actions. For example: "The boy took a sip of his drink quietly."—it's an understatement that a sip is 'quiet', so adding the adverb is redundant. This reliance also hindered you from making your characters more lifelike, so to speak. 

"Why did you ask me to leave but let me sit instead?" Andy questioned curiously. Instead of saying "questioned curiously", it would be better to show his curiousity through his facial expressions or gestures. A better way of saying it is:

"Why did you ask me to leave but let me sit?" Andy questioned, raising an eyebrow.

There's also the POV switches (which I've already described) and I felt like there could be a little more emotional depth for the protagonist, namely Andy in the first three chapters. I felt like we only scraped the surface of his character, when there's a lot more going on underneath.

Characters:

Andy— The first protagonist we encounter in the story. He's patient, soft-spoken, and compliant. 

Levi—The second protagonist and is the opposite to Andy. He's dominative, and he seems like the type to fight for what he wants. 

Cathy— The youngest character I've met so far. She hasn't talked a lot, but she didn't come across as a whiny kid or anything, although it's clear that the bond with her brother is stronger than the one between Levi and his sister. Maybe because she's younger, and is more reliant on her brother.

Lynn—Typical 13 year old. She's a little recalcitrant and a teensy bit hormonal, but that's only because she seems to have a crush on Andy. 

Diamond rating ♢ (1—10): 7

I felt like Boys of Suburbia is a strong seven, because it has a good plot, characters, and the storyline was easy to read. There is some development needed, mostly when it comes to the characters, since the story revolves a lot about them rather than the setting/plot. This story has potential though, so I wish you luck on the rest of it! (Sorry for the long wait btw)