~Chapter Two~

Dark Secrets

"Are you paying any attention to me? Rose?... ROSE!"

Rose blinked a few times, knowing that she had let her mind wander, yet again. "Huh? Oh. Yeah, sorry, Emily. I'm still listening."

Emily Hansen and Rose Connelly were Paramedics, as well as best friends, and were sitting in their ambulance waiting for any emergency calls to come through their dispatch radio.

For the past ten minutes, she had been listening to her friend ramble on about her husband, Chris, and two-year-old daughter, Katie. Rose dearly loved Emily and her family, but her heart was full of sorrow, and dark kept secrets. Secrets that she didn't dare utter aloud to anyone. Not even her best friend.

Emily looked over at her, her bright blue eyes wide with concern. "Rose... what's wrong?"

Emily could tell that something was eating at her best friend for a while now, but she never wanted to push her to tell her anything she didn't want to discuss. However, with Rose becoming more withdrawn and unlike her kind and bubbly self, she felt that she needed to get down to the core of Rose's problems.

Rose blinked a few more times and then smiled gently. "Nothing's wrong, Em. I'm sorry. I'm just tired. We've been working a lot, and it's starting to get to me a little bit."

Emily, however, looked unconvinced. "Uh-huh. Sure. That's the primary school's answer. You have been my best friend long before we became medic partners, and you seem to forget that I know you. For the past six months, you have become more and more withdrawn and unlike yourself. Come on, please! Talk to me!"

Rose looked at Emily, with clamped lips still in a slight smile, almost as though she was masking annoyance. Rose smiled sweetly and said, "Em, I promise. I..."

But Emily wasn't having it.

"No, Rose. Stop. You are like a sister to me, and I won't let you avoid me anymore. I've given you time to keep to yourself, but something is seriously wrong. I can just... feel it."

Rose exhaled sharply, and Rose's smile and fake facade fell. She looked away from Emily and needed to get out of this tightly confined cab space all of a sudden. She was starting to feel claustrophobic and panicked, but she didn't dare head back to the fire station.

Suddenly, Rose felt a soft hand on hers.

Looking over at Emily, her bright blue eyes piercing her vibrant hazel-green ones, and watched her best friend look her over and knew what she was seeing. She had very light tan skin, and great bone structure was also very skinny but had more feminine curves than Emily did. However, unlike Emily's short blonde hair, hers was waist-long, auburn-red hair that was tied back in a single braid, which cascaded all the way down her back.

Though Rose was insanely beautiful, Emily could see dark shapes starting to form under her eyes, and her smooth, tan skin was almost pale and colorless. It troubled her, and she was not the Rose she knew.

"Rose," Emily finally pleaded. "Please... tell me what's wrong. You're starting to scare me. Are... are you sick?"

Rose shook her head, still not looking at her friend. She was focusing on almost everything else. She saw a hot dog vendor down the street and decided to stare and focus on him.

"No, Emily, I'm not sick," she replied quietly.

Emily huffed a breath out in impatience. "Okay... fine. Don't talk to me. I just thought that being best friends means that you can trust and confide in me. I guess that's all over now, isn't it?"

Rose groaned. Emily was pulling that card again. She looked over at her friend and said urgently, "Emily, please stop. You know that I will confide in you when I'm ready..." She paused when she saw Emily's eyes widen.

"So, there IS something wrong!"

Rose groaned out loud, rolled her eyes, and snapped, "EMILY!"

Emily glared at Rose, and an awkward silence passed between them for a few minutes. Suddenly, Emily yelped out loud, making Rose jump and clutch her heart.

"What?"

"... you're pregnant!"

Rose looked at her with confusion. Emily wasn't asking; she was almost diagnosing that as what was bothering her. Rose stared at Emily for a minute, amazed at her friend's guess.

If only she knew...

Emily was always talking about having more kids. She and Chris were talking about becoming pregnant again, to give Katie a sibling, and she couldn't wait for her best friend to join the 'mommy club'. But with Rose, this topic has become a very sensitive one, and she avoided it at all costs.

"No," Rose said in an annoyed tone.

"No?" Emily questioned, clearly disappointed.

"No."

Emily sighed, putting her hands up in surrender. "Fine. You win. This time."

Rose let out a true laugh, shaking her head. Emily glared at her friend but continued their conversation, hating silences.

"Doesn't Kevin eventually want kids?" Emily asked, lightly, trying to change the mood and subject.

Little did Emily know that Rose's heart suddenly lurched sickeningly, and her palms started to sweat and shake. As calmly as she could, Rose placed her hands on the steering wheel to try to steady her breathing and calm her nerves by holding onto something steady. She was unnerved by her inward actions towards the mention of her husband's name.

Emily did not know, and could never know, that these six months with her new husband have been pure and unadulterated hell. Rose could distantly hear Emily gabbing on and on about how much she has enjoyed having Katie again, but she was not listening and could not bear to listen anymore.

Gripping the steering wheel tighter, she could feel tears glazing over her eyes. Focus, Rose. She willed herself to calm down. Breathe... just breathe.

Finally, another voice, much different than Emily's, came on over their dispatch radio and grabbed at both girl's attention. "Stand-by for an unknown medical in FDNY's 5's area." the voice said monotonically.

Taking a deep breath and willing her tears to vanish from her eyes. "That's us," Rose said in a surprisingly steady and normal voice.

Emily had, thankfully, stopped talking and listened with full attention to the incoming medical call for their unit. Emily flipped open the unit's laptop to find the information coming in from their dispatch system.

"Okay..." Emily said, searching quickly through the laptop's dispatch pushes. "It looks like the call is coming from Madison Square Park."

Rose nodded, "We are close. Let's go."

Just as Rose put the ambulance into the driving gear, the radio put out some static before that same voice stated, "Medic Ambulance 5 respond to a 7-year- old child fall in Madison Square Park, located at Fifth Avenue and Broadway at 23rd Street. Caller states that the child has not lost consciousness but is bleeding from an open wound. Possible open fracture. No other info at this time. Bravo response, time out at 13:32 hours."

Rose flipped on the unit's lights and sirens and began to make her way to the park. "Medic Ambulance 5, enroute." She spoke clearly through their ambulance radio back to dispatch.

She loved her job and especially loved the distraction that it brought to her own personal hell, but the next eighteen hours of her shift was going to go by quickly, and then she would go home and endure the hell that was always waiting for her.

------------------------------------

Hours seemed to pass, leaving Emily and Rose steadily busy with calls. Before the pair knew it, nightfall was upon them, and they would need to return to the station for dinner. Rose and Emily worked one twenty-four-hour shift a week, starting at seven in the morning. Though it was part-time, those hours did not go by slow enough. Rose was left with five to six days at home with her husband. For Emily, it worked out nicely.

Part-time in New York, paid out some benefits for EMS, making it easy for Emily to be home with her daughter and easier on her husband for financial purposes.

For Rose, it was a nightmare.

Again, with the thought of Kevin, her palms started to sweat. Kevin was a full-time divorce attorney and made perfect money, especially in New York City. He often told Rose that she did not have to work since he made plenty of money, but it was the only escape she had. The only escape he allowed, for now.

The two had met through Emily's husband, Chris, back in their college days. Chris and Kevin were acquaintances, and their close friends brought Rose and Kevin together on a blind date.

Rose breathed deeply as thoughts and memories swam back into her mind.

Emily yawned, "Ohhh, man. What a day. What do you say? Wanna head back to the station and get some sleep before a night call comes in?"

Rose looked at the clock and was surprised when she realized that it was nearing nine in the evening. It was fully dark outside now, and they had a very good chance at running calls throughout the night until their shift ended at 7 the next morning.

Rose sighed. "Sure thing."

She hated going back to the station because she knew there would always be the one she was trying to avoid, her husband, Kevin.

Sure enough, as Rose pulled the ambulance into the station's bay, she could see Kevin's black Audi parked in the back parking lot. Family was always welcome to visit the station, and Kevin, without fail, would stop by to see Rose on his way home from his office. Rose put the ambulance into park but couldn't seem to think about anything as she turned the engine off.

Emily stepped out of the ambulance, but Rose stayed in the cab a little bit longer.

"Hey?... Are you coming?" Emily acquired, stretching, grateful to be standing and out of that cramped cab space.

Rose had paled slightly and nodded. "Yeah, tell the crew I'll be inside in a few minutes. I've got some paperwork to finish up real fast."

Emily looked confused. "Um... no, you don't. I've already finished that paperwork. We are, for once, all caught up until our next call. You're welcome."

Emily looked proud, but Rose felt panic rising more steadily up into her throat. Quickly, trying to make up any excuse. "Right... I'm going to, uh, tidy up the back and restock what supplies we used today."

Emily raised her eyebrows slightly, and then after staring at Rose for a long moment, she finally shrugged. "Okay, good thinking. Do you want any help?"

Rose smiled and shook her head, trying to steady her heart by breathing deeply and silently. "Thanks, but no. Go on and get some food. I can smell that the crew made some dinner. I'll be up in a minute."

Emily smiled back and walked away, leaving Rose in the bay alone. Her smile faded as she was on the verge of having a panic attack.

Taking a few more deep but shaky breaths, she made her way to the back of the ambulance and started to clean and restock it. Ten minutes went by in silence as Rose restocked the ambulance, then the interior lights of the ambulance turned off, leaving her in darkness. Normally, it never bothered her, as the lights did that automatically after ten minutes of being left on... but she could feel a silent terror grip on her chest.

Somehow, she could feel that his presence was nearby. She could always feel him when he was nearby.

Slowly, trying to stay calm, Rose climbed over the stretcher in the middle of the back of the ambulance to flip the switch to turn the interior lights back on, but, before she could turn them back on, a deep silky voice came from the opened side door.

"Why are you avoiding me, my Rose?"

Rose froze, her hands just barely touching the switch, but not enough to activate the lights. She could not see his face yet, but there was an edge to his voice that was carefully calm. But she knew that he was angry. Dangerous.

As calmly as she could, she flipped the switch on, letting the light flood the darkness. Forcing herself to stay calm, Rose looked up to meet his gaze.

Kevin was a tall and muscular man, dressed in his usual business suit. His tie was loosened, and his buttoned shirt was open slightly to give him a more 'casual' air to his professional look since he was off work.

Outsiders would look at Kevin and swoon at his physical looks, just as Rose once had. He had short, nicely kept, dark brown hair and equally chocolate brown eyes. His skin was a natural, deep tan color, and his smile was kept white and perfect. He knew that he was a good-looking man and often used that power on other women... especially in front of Rose.

She took a deep breath and forced herself to look into his deep eyes. Though they were a dark chocolate brown color, they seemed to turn black when he became angry.

This trait, in Kevin, frightened her the most.

After what seemed like forever, Rose finally mustered the strength to speak, trying to keep her voice calm and steady. Unfortunately for her, it only came out in a whisper.

"I'm not avoiding you."

Damn nerves! Rose cursed at herself. She forced her eyes to stay on his, unable to swallow. Any weakness she showed to him, he took it and often crushed her.

Kevin's dark eyes seemed to flash. He smiled widely at her, showing those white sparkly teeth that she hated. He moved closer to Rose, suddenly, making her jump, but surprisingly, he pulled her gently from the inside of the ambulance and into a hug.

She could smell his sickening aftershave...and a hint of a woman's perfume.

Rose's eyes started to glisten with tears, and it took her entire will to swallow them back before he saw. Rose knew that he was unfaithful to her, and he was letting Rose know of his control over her. Over every aspect of her life. He was going to be unfaithful to her, whether she disagreed or not.

Keeping her arms down at her side, she balled her fists in a ball.

Sensing her tension, Kevin moved his hands down her arms and forced her arms around his neck, and lingered his hands near the side of her chest, leaving the lightest of touches. She felt her heart pumping harder, and it was a serious struggle to keep her breathing calm.

Finally, he breathed in her ear, "Open your heart to me, Rose. I expect my wife to greet her husband every moment that she has with him."

She could smell a potent and familiar smell on his breath and knew that he had been drinking alcohol. Drinking was his favorite past-time and was the fuel to the fire of her hell. She had to swallow at that moment to try to keep her nausea down, hating how he made her feel.

"How about a kiss for your husband?" Kevin cooed, almost mockingly, into her ear. "I've missed you all day, after all."

Rose closed her eyes, screaming internally, praying that he would soon release her and leave her be. Knowing she had no choice, or else she would later suffer the consequence, she pulled back slightly to face him face forward. She slowly started to inch her lips to his. Losing patience, however, he brought a strong hand behind her head and crushed their lips together.

Their kiss was anything but loving and romantic. If anyone saw them, you would see that the two newlyweds were passionately in love, but it was not that, to Rose's heartache. Kevin forced his tongue into her mouth, and she nearly gagged on the after-taste of the vodka that he had downed. She was amazed by her own strength and stomach and that she could deliver the kiss he desired.

After an unbearable amount of time, Kevin finally released her. She stepped back slightly from him and took some deep breaths of fresh air, was sweating, and felt as though she was about to pass out.

Kevin, however, was satisfied for the time being. "Now, that's how every kiss should be, Rose. It keeps the passion alive in a relationship, if you know what I mean?"

Rose forced a smile on her face, not breaking their eye contact.

"Absolutely," she lied. "Thank you for always helping me to be a better wife for you."

Kevin smiled smugly at her but then stepped up close to her again. "There's a lot you need to be grateful for... and a lot to learn," he said, suddenly looking dangerous again. "I'm growing tired of always being the one to initiate any contact with my own damn wife."

Before Rose could say anything in reply, he suddenly grabbed her chin in an iron-tight grasp and brought her face inches from his. "You need to step up and be the wife that I deserve... or else ...you'll pay dearly for your lack of actions." His grip tightened around her chin, making Rose start to panic. Quickly, she nodded, praying that he would release her. He wouldn't go as far as to hurt her in a public place, but then again, he seemed to be losing all restraint when it came to hurting her. Each 'lesson' became more violent and more frequent. The drinking increased to dangerous levels, and she knew that she was entering a very dangerous phase of an abusive relationship.

Kevin suddenly released her in a whip-like way, as though he was suddenly disgusted by the very sight of her. "Good," he said, almost business-like, "I'm going to go home and entertain myself for the night since you will not be able to entertain me tonight."

As he was turning away, Rose mustered up the courage and whispered in a snarl, "I know what you are doing to entertain yourself, Kevin."

Kevin turned back towards her, and instantly she was frightened by the sudden darkness and evil that twisted his young face, almost daring her to continue. Without thinking it through, she continued. "If you think that sleeping with a bunch of sluts to keep yourself occupied is going to heal and fill that massive emptiness in your soul, then you are a fool."

Her fear quickly turned into rage the more she spoke her mind.

This drunk, violent and evil man was not someone that she would have ever married. He was not the man that she thought she knew. But, then again, they didn't know each other all that well before getting married. She was hooked by his charming good looks, and his equally charming personality, at the time. Little did she know that his tactic was to get his hooks in her before dragging her down this hellish path of abuse and violence.

At her words, Kevin stepped forward slowly, never taking his eyes off Rose, and before she could register what had happened, he swung his palm across her face, backhanding her across the face.

Crying out loudly, she stared at him with wide eyes and was surprised that he swung at her in such a public space. But then she realized that he had backed her towards the ambulance so that the large fire engine guarded them.

"It's more than what I ever get from you," he hissed in her face as she was blinking tears from her eyes. "Learn some humility, Rose, or else you'll find yourself divorced... with no money to keep yourself alive and no job to keep you off the streets. Or worse yet, you'll find yourself dead." He smiled a nastily smug smile again, as Rose's heart seemed to freeze in horror.

She really would be sick now. She hated him. Every inch of her life he had control over, and she could never seem to be released from his iron-like grasp, but his words settled with her.

Noting the legitimate threat, Rose didn't say anything as he stepped away.

"Good girl... you've learned some humility already. Enjoy the rest of your night while you can."

Raising his hand again, he gently caressed Rose's slapped cheek and planted a tender kiss where she was sure red marks were forming. Rose closed her eyes, shaking, not moving, and with that, he stalked away, proud of what he had accomplished tonight, shutting the bay door with an echoing bang, leaving her to stand alone in absolute silence.

The second he left, Rose be-lined it towards the bay sink, where they would wash the exterior of their vehicles, and emptied the contents of her stomach with loud, uncontrollable vomiting. She kept throwing up violently until she was left dry heaving.

Rose let out a staggered cry as tears finally poured down her face. Rinsing her mouth with water, she forced herself to take in the air around her.

Breathe... Just Breathe...

Rose was so sick of telling herself to breathe, so sick of being in this predicament. But what could she do? If she left him, which she wanted to do the moment he raised his hand to her on the eve of their honeymoon, he would find her and kill her. They had officially crossed the point of no return. That's why she has been feeling so uneasy. Her very life was being threatened, and her instincts knew it. Her fight or flight instincts were officially kicked into high gear, and she was in full-blown survival mode.

Memories began pouring, unwillingly, into her head. She sank to the cold, cement floor, and she brought her knees to her chest. She gently touched the sting of her face, where he had slapped her...

At their wedding, he had drunk too much champagne, and she kindly and playfully advised him to stop drinking for the night. The next thing she knew was the monster that she knew him to be today. Still, in her wedding dress, he swung his fist forward and made contact with her face, hard enough to knock her down to the floor of their hotel. Drunk and speech slurring, he screamed, "Don't tell me I've had enough...!" Raising his fists again...

Soon after, he passed out asleep. She had placed his drunk, unconscious body in the bed after he beat her. She walked to the hotel bathroom in their honeymoon suite room and cried for what seemed like hours, in complete and utter betrayal and shock. Who was that man out there? Never in all their months of dating did he ever show her signs that he would harm her, or at least, she never noticed the red-flagged signs through her love for him. The signs were always there. She just never paid any attention to them.

She washed the wedding make-up off her face and saw the bruises sporting her eye, forehead, cheeks, and the cut lip that was swelling significantly. She stayed in that bathroom all night, afraid of the man out there on the bed. This was their honeymoon, and it had taken an unexpected and horrendous turn.

In the morning, Kevin woke up hungover and overly emotional.

"I'm so sorry, Rose." He tearfully and pathetically cried as he saw the marks on her face. "I will never hurt you again..."

At the time, she believed him, and they finally spent the remainder of their honeymoon in newly-wed bliss. He never raised his fist to her the remainder of the trip, and Rose had felt that maybe it truly was the alcohol. He kissed her, whispering and declaring his undying love for her. They kissed fiercely and consummated their marriage. She loved him, forgave him, and decided to trust him...

Rose grimaced at that memory... because now, she hated him and hated herself.

She closed her eyes and willed the memories to seep back into her damaged soul. She had to put a strong face on so that she could face her station crew and Emily. They could not know, or else he would kill her that she was sure of.

Taking deep breaths, she stared out the ceiling bay window at the moon and into the night sky. She prayed for relief, a new life, a new love, and wanted nothing more than to be free of her monster husband and her hellish life.

Falling to her knees, she finally let out the explosion of grief, rage, and fear, clasping her hands over her mouth to minimize the amount of crying and screams in which were escaping her.

She had endured six months of this nightmare, and it was only getting worse. If she didn't find a successful way out, then she was sure that she wouldn't make it to her next birthday, a year from the end of the current month of October.

On October 24th, she would be twenty-three; and saw no amount of hope of ever making it past that age. If she didn't escape Kevin's wrath, then she would most likely die under his hand.