XV. More Than Intended (new)

♡Gaurav's POV♡

"I can't believe it. We asked you to confess the truth and explain the situation. How did you lose her trust and ruined everything?

I face a stunned Durga and sigh in defeat.

After failing in every attempt to talk with Roshni since last night. I arrived at my non-biological parents' home to narrate the situation and take help. Because I need to fix this damage as soon as possible.

I can't bear to see her sadness and tears. She didn't eat dinner yesterday, just stayed under the bedsheet and cried till exhaustion forced her to sleep. She even shred some tears in the morning, while making breakfast and denied to even be touch by me.

She is hurt more than I assumed she will be on knowing the truth.

I have ruined it so much.

"It's our mistake, we shouldn't have forced you."

I shake my head, "Not your fault. You both were right, she needs to know everything, especially the fact that concerns her. And how can I ignore, it takes huge courage and strength to fight with your emotions for sharing the painful past. She has shared every single thing with me and it wasn't right on my part to hide this fact."

She pats my knee and assures, "Ok. Let's find a solution to fix this problem."

I nod at her and take the cup of coffee from Jay, who sits beside me before giving my shoulder a squeeze.

"She is not answering to my calls. Then I tried with Durga's phone and she answered, but disconnected immediately after listening to my voice."

I sigh once again. She was serious about keeping distance from men.

Durga stomps her foot and states, "Sometimes I don't understand how her parents can be so cruel. They called their daughter's love, a passing affair and kept every male under same category. That poor girl has suffered so much."

"And now I am the new addition to her list of cruel people."

"At least you are not an addition to her list of boyfriends."

I glare at Jay for his comment and Durga slaps his arm, which makes him laugh.

"What? You are the one, who still wanted to hide the fact from her. I was pressuring you because she deserved to know. Now if you ruined everything then what's my mistake? You should have asked us to help you."

I lower my gaze and trace the rim of my coffee mug. It's my mistake. I confessed the truth in hurry instead of planning and saying calmly, not when she had just expressed her blind faith on me.

I stand and punch the nearest wall, making Durga push me back on the couch.

"Hey! No violence. If you have committed a mistake then rectify it. Self damaging or sulking in a corner is not a solution."

She glares at me after shouting and Jay stands to pull her back to make her sit on the couch.

"Calm down Goddess Durga. Our son is already depressed."

"But he is hurting himself."

"He is just trying to divert himself to think properly. You calm down. We already have one woman to handle."

She glares at her husband, but relaxes and faces me to give an assuring nod. While I lean back on the couch and close my eyes to find a solution. What can make her talk with me?

Should I ask help from her three musketeers?

No no. Jinal will kill me painfully slow without a second thought. It's a risky idea.

Before I can think further, I get a message from Sourav - Come home with Roshni. Mom's order.

I sigh and show the message to them, only for Jay to jump in excitement with an idea, "Great opportunity. Take a white rose bouquet with sorry note and pick her up from the office. Go on a longer route to your parents home and try to talk with her."

I face Durga, who doesn't seem confident with his idea, "Longer route is fine, but I doubt flowers will be helpful. Roshni isn't someone to melt through gifts. She craves emotional support."

She is right. Roshni is emotional and getting something through money can offend her.

"I will go with longer route and give roses after she forgives me. I won't use materialistic things to pacify her."

Jay smirks and Durga nods in approval as I finish the coffee in one large gulp before leaving.

I hope I don't commit another mistake.

#

I committed another mistake. I can't believe it.

I feel like eating the strongest poison available on God's green, but slowly polluting planet earth and tying myself to the railway tracks for a train to crush me.

I just want die because of shame.

How can I be so stupid?

I sigh as I remember entering her father's office UNINFORMED and finding them counting a huge amount of cash. Her father quickly hide the money with newspaper and glared at Roshni with hatred.

Then he forced a fake smile at me and asked if I needed anything. I could sense the disapproval in his eyes and frustration in his tone.

But being a coward, I quickly informed about my mother's message and left the office after saying that I waiting at the parking zone.

Why am I committing so many mistakes?

I hear the sound of heels and find her approaching me with fresh tears in her eyes. No doubt he has scolded her. He doesn't trust her a bit in case of money and property. He thinks she will ditch him by joining hands with me.

Roshni goes to open the door and I sit in the driver's seat before facing her. She wipes her eyes and I move my hand to wipe her cheeks. But she leans away from me and I reluctantly withdraw my hand.

"Roshni, I am really sorry. I should have informed before coming. It's my mistake-"

"Thank you for reducing some of my work load. Henceforth I will not be handling payment or cash related work. Thanks for the help."

I close my eyes and clench my fists in frustration. What the hell am I doing since yesterday?

I should die and rot in hell for my deeds.

I eyes and open my mouth to apologise, but she informs, "Your mother will be angry if we didn't reach soon."

My mother would never be angry, especially on her and we both know it. But I don't argue because I know, she wants distance from me.

The girl, who was spending every night since 2 months in my arms. Today she wants to stay away from me.

I guess, I deserve it.

#

My mother greets us with a hug and takes Roshni to the couch. While I frown on finding everyone at home, including Jay and Durga during work hours.

What's the catch?

My mother asks Roshni, "Do you know why did I call you here?"

She shakes her head in negative and my mother informs with a smile, "Tomorrow is Karwa Chauth and I want you to keep fast for Gaurav."

Shit.

Karwa Chauth is a fast, which married females keep for their husband's long life and wellbeing.

But Roshni is too annoyed to agree for this fast.

I turn to face my non-biological parents for help, but they deny by shaking their heads and I step ahead to remove Roshni from this situation

"Mom, she is sindhi and Karwa Chauth is a punjabi festival."

"After marriage, she is a punjabi as well."

Before I can protest further, she asks Roshni, "Will you fast, dear?"

I was expecting her to deny, but to my surprise she agrees and my family cheers for her in excitement. While I slap my forehead.

Roshni will never forgive me after this.

Jay chuckles silently before taking me away from the crowd. The ladies start explaining the importance of this fast to her and Durga holds her hand in support, sensing the sadness behind her fake smile.

I am so grateful that Jay and Durga celebrate this festival with us. Durga can help to comfort her.

But I am also sad because Durga is never invited in any of Jay's family functions. They are unhappy because Jay married an infertile girl. But he didn't leave her side and to avoid unnecessary fights, they separated from his family.

That's why my mother invites them every year to celebrate this festival and performs the duties of a mother-in-law for Durga.

"She is sad. What happened?"

I narrate my new mistake to Jay and he pats my back in assurance. Though he and I both know, the problem has increased to double now.

Damn my fate.

#

The ladies sit in the living room with hands filled with henna designs, while we men take care of the decoration. It's Roshni's first fast, so the value of this festival increases ten folds. The atmosphere at my home is similar to the time of my marriage.

I and Roshni will be staying here till tomorrow night. Mom wants her first fast to be conducted at the home where I was born and with everyone. She didn't object and I didn't interfere in the matter.

But there is a shortage of rooms. So, me, Sourav and Jay will sleep in Sourav's bedroom. Durga and Roshni will sleep in my old room. While Mahek will sleep in Alia's room with Ayaan.

Once Alia sets the dinner, we make plates for our wives since their henna design is still wet. I just pray that Roshni allows me to feed her.

I am lucky when she doesn't deny because she has no option. Only female without henna design is Alia, who is taking care of Ayaan.

Though on the first morsel, she bites my finger and looks down at her henna design. Even I take a glance of it and notice our names written together inside a peacock design.

I couldn't help but smile at her silent complain for having my name on her hand when she is utterly annoyed with me.


"Looks like someone is missing the privacy of eating alone at home. Right Roshni?"

I turn to glare at my brother for his teasing comment, while others giggle on seeing Roshni's red face. That only I know is because of rage and not shyness.

"Like you are missing holding hands under the dining table. Right Mahek?"

Now he glares at me for exposing his secret and Mahek blushes, while everyone laughs at them.

Sourav opens his mouth to retort, but our parents don't allow us to continue. I wink at him to tease him silently before offering a piece of carrot to my angry wife.

She again bites my finger and I place my foot over her. She faces me with a furious look and I shrug, while eating a piece of cucumber.

She tries to release her foot from mine and moves her hand to punch my stomach. Only to stop because of the wet henna design and I caress her cheek lightly when offering a piece of cucumber.

I know, I am playing with fire. But it is totally worth it.

#

I wake up at 8 am next morning and find others already awake. I had slept after 2 am because even after teasing her, she didn't talk with me. Then I had to wake up to feed her at 4 am, before sunrise as per the ritual of this fast. But even at that time, she didn't talk with me.

I am scared to think if she will ever talk with me. I am ready to do anything for even hearing a profanity from her.

I miss her voice. I miss our talks and hugs. I miss her so much.

I feel so empty and I don't understand why?

I am pulled out of my thoughts by Alia, who peeps inside the room to announce breakfast.

Her anger will be taken care later, first I need to give her food. I don't want her to suffer because of my family's traditions.

I drag Jay to the dining table with me and ask him to keep an eye around, so I can steal some food for Roshni.

"Are you sure, she will eat?"

"Obviously. She is annoyed with me and would be cursing me now for making her fast. Plus, this fast doesn't even allow to drink water and the moon will rise at 9:45 pm. She will kill me for starving her."

He doesn't say a word and I turn around to find her. But what I see makes my heart skip a beat.

My Roshni. My sindhi girl is dressed in a red punjabi dress with matching accessories and braided hairstyle, which makes her look like a gorgeous married woman.

Like? No. She is gorgeous and this attire just increases her beauty.

"Doesn't she look beautiful?"

I don't know who's voice it is, still I answer in a daze, "Yes, very beautiful."

"Want to kidnap and take her back to your home."

"Definitely."

"Want to hold her in your arms and never let go?"

"Never."

"Then Mom will scream her lungs out for ruining her first fast."

I get back to my senses and open my mouth to scold the person, only to find Sourav covering his mouth to not laugh. But Jay does laugh openly, encouraging him.

"Your son is desperate, Jay. Should I expect Ayaan's cousin by 9 months?"

Jay nods in positive, while giggling and I glare at them, "Grow up, will you two?"

They only laugh in response and I roll my eyes before walking towards Roshni.

She avoids me, but I hold her hand when no one is watching, making her face me with a glare. I gesture her to remain silent and drag her towards my old room without anyone can realise.

I shut the door once we are inside and remove the parathas wrapped in an aluminium foil from my t-shirt. I offer to her with a smile and she frowns in confusion.

"Quickly eat it. No one will know."

"Gaurav, if you have forgotten then I am fasting and can eat only after moon rises."

I frown in confusion now, "You are seriously fasting? I thought this is an arrangement, so you will not fast for me."

"If I had to deny for this fast then I had an option yesterday when your mother asked me. I agreed that means I am serious."

"But I thought, you only agreed to make my family happy."

She rolls her eyes, "Haven't I performed every ritual needed to be done as your wife and their daughter-in-law with complete dedication? Then why would I cheat now? Gaurav, this marriage is an arrangement for us and not for your family. They are busy in making my first fast special and memorable. And you want me to play with their emotions?"

I open my mouth to speak, but she interrupts, "But thank you very much for letting me know how low you think of me."

Before I can react, she opens the door and walks out of the room.

I slap my forehead. My third mistake.

What the hell is wrong with me?

#

I sigh in helplessness after spending 7 hours in trying to talk and apologise to Roshni. But she avoids me each time and even Durga failed to convince her to listen to my explanation.

I am so screwed.

"Trouble in paradise?"

I turn to find Sourav, sitting beside me on the couch. While my father and Jay, joining at our left on the other couch.

Why do I get this feeling that I will be lectured?

My father smiles at me and asks, "Major issue?"

I don't speak and my brother states, "Roshni thinks her sadness is well hidden behind her fake smile. But she doesn't realise we care for her and can sense everything that is going on between you and her."

I face Jay and he nods in positive before I agree to share in the summarised form.

"It's entirely my fault. From 2 days, I am hurting her back to back. First, I scratched her old wound, which I know hurts her the most. Then I became the reason of a harsh scolding from her father. And after those two mistakes, I thought she won't fast for me, so I offered food in the morning secretly, only to hurt her emotions for the third time."

I sigh, "She will never forgive me."

My father chuckles, "Gaurav, a woman can be hell annoyed with her husband. But at the end of the day, she will go to any level for his safety and happiness. Roshni isn't different."

But our relation is.

"And brother, she is way too emotional. Even if she doesn't want to keep fast for you. But seeing mom's excitement, she will never think to cheat and play with the trust."

I nod, agreeing to his words. The one, who was played can never play with other's emotions and trust.

"Seems like our son needs our help, Jay."

"I think, this time we shouldn't help him, Partner. This is a couple's personal matter."

I face Jay with raised eyebrows and he smirks in response, while my brother asks about the gift and I frown in confusion.

"What gift?"

"Don't tell me you didn't get Roshni a gift for her first Karwa Chauth?"

Someone kill me.

"Your fourth mistake, Son."

"Why can't you people tell me earlier? Jay, let's go."

He goes to stand, but my father stops him and instructs to me, "You are seeing this festival since childhood, you should be aware and Jay is not coming with you."

"Why?"

"Because you have hurt her, so you go and find my daughter a special gift, which will make her happy and kill every ounce of sadness."

"But Dad-"

"GET OUT."

I don't dare to argue after witnessing his serious tone and furious eyes. He maybe fun loving and cheerful man, but whenever any of us committed mistake, he is no less than a Hitler.

I rush to the exit of the home, but stop hearing some sound from the temple room. I find my mother reading a mythological book to her three daughter-in-laws.

Roshni is listening to her with concentration and trying to understand the meaning of this fast. It's been 11 hours since she had a drop of water, yet there is no sign of regret or irritation in her eyes.

She is keeping the fast with complete dedication and here, I am repeatedly hurting her.

I am sorry, Roshni. I promise to make you happy again. I promise.

#

I punch my steering wheel in frustration after roaming around for 3 hours with no success to find an appropriate gift for Roshni.

Damn it. I can't find a gift for her. I am so useless.

I have got 4 messages from Jay to be quick as the moon will rise by 9:45 and it's already 8:15 pm.

But I can't return empty hands. I need to find an appropriate gift for Roshni.

I start the car to drive to other mall, when my eyes land on a poster and I press the breaks.

Should I get that? But is my mistake so massive to give her that?

I close my eyes in confusion and Roshni's teary eyes flashes in my mind.

I immediately open my eyes and look at the poster carefully for the address.

My mistake is too massive, so I will get that.

#

I rush to my home and give the gift to Alia to handle. Then run to my room for changing into the punjabi dress and go to the balcony.

I smile at everyone, the men raise their eyebrows and I nod in assurance that I got the right gift. While the women glare at me for vanishing at the time of the ritual.

But as usual Roshni avoids me by playing with Ayaan. She is wearing a red saree now and I fail to keep my eyes off her.

I don't understand, why I react in this way around her these days. This is not the first time, she is dressing up in a punjabi attire or saree. Then why do I lose my senses now?

Maybe her annoyance towards me is causing it. Once we will be back to normal then none of this shall happen.

My mother starts instructing the ritual step by step to Roshni, earning her attention and breaking my trance. Alia takes Ayaan as we men stand in line according to our age. Our wives stand with their back to us and initiate the ritual.

First, the females offer water to the moon by seeing it through a net then they turn around with closed eyes and open to face their respective husband through the same net. This fast is dedicated to the husband, so the wife shouldn't see anyone else's face.

I smile at her and she concentrates on my face to avoid being angry.

She grabs the plate from the table behind and applies vermilion powder on my forehead. She sprinkles raw rice on my head and rotates the plate in circular motion as a gesture to worship me.

Though with the constant mistakes, I don't deserve it. Roshni doesn't have an ounce of anger right now. She is truly performing the ritual with respect and dedication. It just makes me more guilty.

Now it is my turn to perform some ritual. I take a pinch of the vermilion powder to fill in the partition of her hair. Then offer the small clay pot of water for her to drink and a spoonful of sweet kheer. She eats before bending to touch my feet and take my blessings. The ritual ends here.

I place my hand on her head and lean to help her straighten up, while whispering, "I am sorry."

She doesn't react and turns to see the men giving gifts to their wife. Dad got a diamond ring for Mom, Sourav gave antique gold bracelet to Mahek and Jay gifted diamond earrings to Durga.

The men turn to face me and nod in approval before I kneel down. The women frown in confusion and Roshni raises her eyebrows in demanding manner.

"Today, I am supposed to give you a gift. But I am asking you for forgiveness for my each mistake. I am really sorry, Roshni. But my intention was never to hurt you. I regret my carelessness and stupidity."

She remains stunned with my open apology and turns to look at our family. But none of them interfere or utter a word. I look at Alia and she gets me the covered basket, which earns Roshni's attention.

"You don't have to forgive me now. I can wait and don't think that this gift is intended to help in changing your mind. I just wanted to give you something, which you love the most."

She frowns in confusion and I remove the cloth from the top to reveal my gift.

"A cat?"

I hear many shocking gasps, but ignore them and state, "You love cat, so-"

"And you hate them!"

I frown, "How did you know?"

"Whenever I give food to stray cats, you always made disgusting face and I asked Durga. She said a cat attacked you when you were 7 since then you hate them."

I turn to face Durga, who smiles sheepishly and shrugs her shoulders in defence. I face Roshni again and forward the sleeping white Persian male cat in the basket.

Her eyes softens not at the sight of the cat, but at me, "Why did you get a cat when you hate them?"

"It will be a punishment for my mistakes and reminder to never repeat the same. But for you this is just a gift. Not intended to force you for forgiving me."

"But you are forgiven."

My eyes widen at her words and she forwards her hand to help me stand on my feet. She takes the basket and smiles at me, the smile which I was dying to see. My Roshni's real smile.

My family cheers for me just when I was about to hug her. I guess, we have to complete our patch-up for later.

Because right now, important is food. The females haven't eaten in 18 hours.

#

We enter our home and Roshni slowly places the basket on the couch. She allowed Alia to name the cat Romeo when we were eating ice cream post dinner.

She turns to face me, "Thank you for getting Romeo."

"Welcome. But am I really forgiven or you just said because of my family's presence."

"You are. I realised that I overreacted by mixing the two things. I am sorry."

I walk closer and slowly cup her face, afraid to be denied again. Fortunately, she allows and faces me with her innocent eyes.

"It's not your fault. I know it takes lots of courage to share a painful memory and I have always encouraged you to do so. So, I cannot be biased and hide the truth, especially if it concerns you. And Roshni, believe me I never ever doubted you. I know, you won't do anything inappropriate and hurt me. But I also knew you will mix these two things unintentionally and that stopped me. Then instead of planning to confess systematically, I blurted out in hurry. In excitement to talk with you, I reached at your father's office uninformed. And lastly, I know you respect my family's emotions, I just didn't want you to starve an entire day because of me. I am sorry for everything."

"I forgive you and want this problems to end here. I want us the way we are. I cannot stay annoyed with you."

Her confession makes me smile and I lean to kiss her forehead.

"Can I hug you, Your Majesty? I have been dying to do so."

She nods with a smile and I sigh in contentment after embracing her in my arms.

God I missed this. I missed her in these two days. I missed having her in my arms. I missed everything about her.

I kiss her temple and she snuggles against me with closed eyes. While my eyes fall on our reflection on the floor length window. Our arms wrapped around each other and the calmness on our facial expressions. Her head on my chest and my above her head.

Again that same thing stirred in me and in that moment I realised without any regrets that she has become MORE THAN WHAT I HAD INTENDED TO MAKE HER.

************

That's all for now.....will update next part as soon as possible.....hope you liked this part, do give your reviews...till then Keep Smiling and Take Care

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