If there was one thing about human beings it's that we're completely ungrateful and unappreciative of what we have. Whether this be intentional or not, we don't seem to be very grateful creatures. We don't appreciate the small things the most. Like how we can see the blue sky in the morning and see people smile, how we can hear the people we love laugh and hear the waves crashing against the shore, how we can smell the beautiful aroma of blueberry muffins or the scent of roses. Like how we don't appreciate that we have all the right limbs in the right places that function accordingly. Like how we aren't grateful that we can walk, run and dance.

We tend to leave out all the 'small' things when in fact, they're the biggest because without them we can't function properly. But instead we focus on things like money, success, status...

I've learnt this now.

As I stare out the window in the Starbucks café, I realize how I am one of those people. Only now have I realized how much I truly value these things.

I bet Kelcy does too.

Unfortunately for her, it's too late.

I'm not the one who's stuck in a wheelchair for the rest of my life, the one who can't dance any more yet I feel like life seems so dull right now. Kelcy doesn't deserve this; nobody does. Why does life have to be so damn unfair? Maybe I don't have a right to be mad or sad since I'm not the one who has to suffer but I can't help but feel heartache. Kelcy's old life is dead. And I'm not too sure the new one will be much of an improvement.

I feel a body slide into the seat opposite mine and I look at Rachel who gives me a small smile. I return it although mine is much more tired. I hardly slept last night after receiving the news. I couldn't.

I slide her drink across the table and Rachel gets comfortable in her seat.

"Thank you." She says, taking a sip. I nod, playing with the straw in mine.

"How is she?" She asks me softly. I pause my actions and look up with a sad smile.

"She's, uh, she's paralyzed." I say.
Rachel chokes on her drink and my eyes widen in shock.

"Are you okay?" I ask her and she nods, her face turning as red as a tomato. When she recovers from her coughing fit, she shakes her head in disbelief.

"Paralyzed?"

I nod, looking down at my lap.

"How?"

"She had a stroke."

"Don't people who have strokes usually only become paralyzed on one side?"

I shrug. "That's called hemiplegia- the paralysis of one side of the body- but that doesn't mean that it always happens. Kelcy has diplegia. At least it's not her whole body, just the waist down. Not that it makes it any better." I mutter the last part. Rachel purses her lips.

"Do you know what caused it? People don't just have strokes for no reason." She asks hopefully but I shake my head.

"Nathan had somewhere to be so he didn't get the chance to say much." I mumble.

"I'm sorry, Soph. I- I don't know what to say." Rachel apologizes.

"There is nothing to say."

It's quiet after that. What must Rachel say? Sorry? Is that going to make Kelcy walk again? I don't think so. There is nothing to say or do to make this situation better. All I can do is accept it and hope that Kelcy survives this because if I were her, I don't know if I would be able to.

****

If it were true, I'd say that everything returned back to normal on Monday and nothing seemed different. But, that isn't true. Not even close.

Since Ridgevale High does not have the facilities to assist disabled pupils, Kelcy will no longer be able to attend here. Maybe that's why the Elite seem so gloomy today. All of them, except Courtney who isn't here, have this grim look on their faces. They all walk in a slouch, their eyes filled with worry and something like guilt. They all sit around their table in silence and Logan sneers at them whenever James or Tyler tries to crack a joke. Word of Kelcy been rushed to hospital got around the school but no one other than the Elite and Rebels know exactly why she isn't at school. I'm still mad at Chris for holding me back from seeing Kelcy on Friday night; that was a real dick move but I think they feel bad enough without me saying anything.

I always thought the Elite didn't care about anyone other than themselves but I was obviously wrong because they almost seem dysfunctional without Kelcy; or maybe that's on the behalf of Courtney. I ,on the other hand, can't concentrate to save my damn life. It lasts for a span of about two minutes before memories of Friday night keep flooding back. The worst thing is that I doubt Kelcy would want to see me no matter how much I want to see her. Like Courtney said, we aren't friends anymore. We were. Not anymore.

However, if there was one person who definitely seemed to be taking the news badly, it would be Ashleigh. She doesn't seem herself today. Besides the fact that she seems exhausted, she doesn't look herself. Her hair is a mess, her clothes not at their usual notch. I don't blame her though, because I don't look too good either. And in all honesty, I couldn't care less. I feel like shit so if I look like shit at least everyone knows to leave me the hell alone.

Not only that but I can't believe the Elite. None of them told me what happened despite them all knowing. If Nathan hadn't told Alex and I at the hospital, I would be sitting as clueless as the rest of the student body. Maybe they can see I know but one of them could have at least made sure I was kept in the loop. I get it, I'm not one of them anymore so I'm not friends with them either but this is so much bigger. Could they not just suck up this pathetic high school rivalry and let me in on what happened?

"Hey, Soph?" Martin calls out. I look at him, clueless as to what the topic of conversation is.

"Yeah?" I ask.

"We're really sorry." Nina says from next to him.

"It's okay. Thank you guys." I say, eyeing all of them. They all give me sympathetic smiles but the one that really stands out is Thalia's. Dylan doesn't smile at me, he just purses his lips and looks away. I don't have the energy to question their actions so I tune out of the conversation again before Alex murmurs to me.

"You feeling okay?" Alex asks me and I look at him.

"Yeah." I whisper. Alex stares at me for a second too long as if trying to tell if I'm lying or not. I'm feeling okay but that doesn't mean I am okay. There's a difference. Alex kisses my forehead and I sigh in content for just a second.

"I love you so much," he says, his brown eyes causing a slight stir in my stomach. I smile.

"I love you too." I respond. Alex grins, my answer enough for him before he pulls me into his side. I snuggle closer to him, his arms offering comfort and security. However, I look over my shoulder briefly to see Ashleigh walking out of the cafeteria in a hurry, Logan watching her retreating figure.

I have a feeling that nothing will be the same again.

****

Finally, the end of school has arrived. I walk to the library with 'The Hunger Games' placed firmly in my arms. I don't intend on getting a new book but rather just return this one. I don't stop to talk to Mrs Henderson when I get to the library, I simply put it on the 'return' stack before turning around and leaving the library.

I dig around in my pockets for my phone but come up empty. I sigh and swing my bag forward, searching it thereafter but also coming up short. I groan. I don't have patience for this today. I turn around and head back to my locker, that being the only other place it could possibly be. When I reach my locker however, a familiar blonde girl is standing beside it waiting for me.
I walk towards it slowly, casting Ashleigh a frown as I pull my locker open.

"Sophie," She perks up and I frown even harder, reaching for my phone and pulling it out. I am in no mood for the Elite and their games today. I just need a break.
I close my locker shut and raise an eyebrow at Ashleigh. She purses her lips, switching her books from one arm to the other. Up close, I can see how her blue eyes look so sad. I almost feel bad for her.

"I think you should know about something." She mumbles, her stare never faltering. I sigh tiredly.

"I know about Kelcy's condition." I say and she nods.

"I know that. But I don't think you know what actually happened the night of the party." She clarifies and my eyebrows draw together. What more could have happened? Why do I feel like I don't want to know this?

Ashleigh takes my silence as her cue to go on. "Kelcy had the stroke because of her diabetes."

"Kelcy had diabetes?" I ask.

Ashleigh gives me a strange look.
"You didn't know?"

I shake my head, feeling a bit hurt that Kelcy never told me.
"No. Did you?"

"No." Ashleigh responds. "But I assumed you did since you were closer with her."

"Apparently not," I mumble.

"That's not the point." Ashleigh dismisses. "The point is that the only reason why her diabetes was the cause was because she drank excessively, and that combined with not eating and not taking her insulin meant her body couldn't handle all the sugar. She had a diabetic stroke."

"Why is this important?" I croak.

Ashleigh chews on her lip.
"We knew you were coming to the party before you even arrived."

"How-"

"So Courtney decided that it would be a good idea to try and nail you." Ashleigh cuts me off. "She decided to spike your drink and place the date rape drug in Alex's jacket- somehow- so that it would seem like he did it." I gape at her. "But Courtney suggested that if Kelcy were to try to start up a conversation with you, you would be more likely to listen which meant she could slip it in easier."

I... I don't know what to say.

"But Kelcy didn't want to do it." Ashleigh shakes her head. "So Courtney tried getting her drunk so that she'd be more willing to. She ended up drinking way more and.. and ended up having the stroke." Ashleigh ends.

I stare at her. I can't believe that Courtney would go to such extreme measures just to try get me and Alex to break-up. She was going to frame him! He could have been charged! I let out a humorless laugh.

"You guys are pathetic." I sneer.
"Not only were you planning on hurting me, you fucked up Kelcy's life! I hope that's an achievement for you. Maybe you'll get a job if you put that on your resume." I spit, my eyes watering.

Ashleigh gives me a pained look.
"I'm sorry, Sophie. I told Courtney not to do it but she didn't want to listen."

I shake my head at her, looking away for a brief second.

"I know that we can't take back what happened but I swear, Sophie, that Courtney won't get away with it this time. I'm done. I can't do this anymore." Ashleigh says, searching my eyes. I purse my lips at her.

"I was done with this game a long time ago, Ashleigh. But this... this was taken to far."

Ashleigh nods and I heave a breath. "Thanks for telling me, Ashleigh." I mumble before turning around and walking away.

I can't do this anymore.

Kelcy is paralyzed because she was supposed to spike my drink and frame Alex.

She's paralyzed because... because of me.

If I hadn't left the Elite and gone out with Alex, Courtney would have never tried to break us up which means she wouldn't have wanted to spike my drink at the party which also means she wouldn't have forced alcohol down Kelcy's throat. Kelcy would still be walking.

This is my fault. All of this. Everything that has happened this year is all on me.

I don't realize where I'm walking as I rush out the school. I try to dodge Alex who is waiting against his car. He looks up at me and when he sees my tear stricken face, he puts his phone away and walks over to me with worry. I don't wait for him though. I instead run as fast as I can away from him.

I just need to be alone.

He calls after me and I run across the street, a random car beeping at me as it presses on its breaks, leaving Alex watching me from the other side of the road. I don't know how long it takes for me to get to my house but when I do, I rush inside. I run up to my room and throw my bag on the floor quite aggressively.

I pull at my hair and let out a sob. I kick my desk and a few pens roll off of it. I kick it harder until I feel an ache rush up my leg from my toes. Another sob tears through me as my foot aches in pain and I hunch over, crying even harder. My tears soak my jeans and I feel the weight of the world on my shoulders.

It's all my fault.

It's all my fault.

Why am I so destructive?

I stare up at the ceiling and sob. I then blink, looking at my wall of photos. Hundreds of the Elite and I are still hanging on it. I don't know why I haven't taken it down yet. I should have done it a long time ago. I stand up unbalanced, limping over to it. I look at all of the pictures individually. The one of Chris and I on his car, the one of all of us at party, Kelcy and I swimming in a pool, Courtney and I posing in the middle of the dance floor.

And then I rip them off.

I don't pull them off. No. I grip them and rip them off my wall, pulling them off with all the anger and sadness I've bottled up inside of me. I don't want to remember all these times. I don't want to remember them, I don't want to remember what I've done, I don't want to remember who I was with them.

Some hang limply off my wall while majority lay torn up on my floor. I pick them up and tear them further, shredding them into tiny pieces so that they're no longer recognizable. Good. I throw the scraps of paper at nothing in particular before I start bawling again. I stare at the mess I made and my shoulders slump as I weep. I kick my wall again and when I feel an excruciating pain in my foot, I whimper.

"Fuck," I hiss, leaning against my wall. I choke out a sob, my throat feeling like sandpaper. I feel a scream threatening to rip from my throat and I pull at my hair and let it out, feeling satisfaction rise within me. I lean my head back and my shoulders shake with not-so silent sobs. I curl into myself, falling onto my side and holding my knees to my chest. I shut my eyes as an abundance of tears flow out of them. All I feel is this aching hollowness knowing that I have robbed Kelcy of one of the things she should have; the use of her legs. How is it that something as small as high school drama could destroy someone's life? Nothing will ever be the same again for Kelcy all because of my decisions. I feel desperate, guilty, hurt and angry all rolled into one. Desperate for all of this to end and for me to be able to move on, guilty that I did this to Kelcy and she'll probably never forgive me, hurt that in the end this is all my fault and angry that I let it get this far.

I cry for a while after that before I close my eyes and feel sleep wash over me. But before I close them shut, my eye catches sight of the photo, that's still whole, in front of me. My cold fingers grip it and I bring it to my face before I smile wistfully at it.

It's a picture of Kelcy and I. We're both seated in the back of Chris's car. My hands are in the air in peace signs as I stick my tongue out. Kelcy squints her eyes and grins. That was a good day.

I close my eyes, exhausted from drowning in emotions.

Sleep comes soon and I smile as I welcome it, reminiscing everything that was once so incredibly good.

****

♛ALEX ROSEWOOD♛

I didn't know what happened in school but seeing Sophie run off like that, in that emotional state, sent my heart into overdrive. However, what really set me off was when she was running away from me. All I could think was:
What the fuck did the Elite say now?

I didn't want to fight with Sophie. Especially not now when she needs me for support. Since we found out Kelcy is paralyzed, Sophie hasn't really been herself. I can't blame her though. That was some heavy shit she had to take. But I don't want her to push me away. I need her just as much as she needs me. Sophie is like my drug and I'm addicted. I can't live without her. I learnt that during our first- and hopefully last- argument.

That's why when Sophie crosses the road and almost gets knocked by a car, I don't let her go. I turn back around, jogging to the school parking lot and climb into my car and drive to her house. I assume that's where she ran off. It was in that direction anyway. I step on the gas and when I pull up outside her house, I feel my nerves twindle. Maybe she needed solitude today and she needed to be alone, but sometimes even when someone says they need that, they don't actually mean it. What they actually want is for you to be there for them even if they push you away. I'm hoping Sophie wants the latter.

I walk into the quiet house. It doesn't sound like anyone is even home but I can't take that chance. I'd rather be safe than sorry. That's why when I walk upstairs and into Sophie's room, my lungs can't seem to take in air as I look at the destruction of her safe haven. Her bag is thrown on the floor, the contents spilling out haphazardly while the pens on her desk are on the floor. Her desk looks a little wonky on the one leg and I try to come up for a reason as to why that is.

What really hits me, though, is the figure laying crumpled on the floor besides all the pictures that have been ripped off her wall. My heart aches as I see what she did in her act of despair.

I approach her quietly, not wanting to wake her up. I lean down and scoop her up in my arms before placing her on her bed. She stirs slightly and I tuck her hair behind her ear as her eye peeks open. "Alex?" She croaks. I grab her hand, rubbing circles on it.

"I'm here, go back to sleep." I say, kissing her forehead. She leans back into her pillow and I watch her drift off slowly.

I get up from where I'm crouching on the floor and start picking up all the pictures she shredded to pieces and throw them in her bin. I pick up the few that are still whole and place them on her desk. I know she'll want a few even though it seemed like she didn't. I pick the few left on the wall off, too, before I pick up her bag and stack it neatly in the corner. Once her room looks tidier, I take place next to her on her bed and she snuggles into me as I rest my arm across her waist and stare at her sleeping body.

She looks so calm and peaceful when sleeping, the way her chest falls steadily. How her brown her spills around her head on the pillow and she tucks one hand under her face.

She's so extraordinary. And damn do I love her. A lot.

However, today she doesn't sleep as peacefully as she normally does. Her cheeks are stained with tear streaks while her nose looks red and stuffy. It breaks my heart to know I wasn't here when she was upset. She turns on to her other side and before I get comfortable and start cuddling her even though it's hot- yes, Alex Rosewood does cuddle- I send Rachel a text. We're already forty five minutes late for work and I can tell that we'll not be making it today.

As I get comfortable with Sophie, my chest pressed firmly against her back while she lays on my one arm and the other stays wrapped around her waist, I can't help but think as to how far we've come. From hating her for who I thought she was to loving her for who she really is. Thats a big jump; and I couldn't be more grateful that I made it. Sophie has made me realize a lot. She's taught me that kindess is everything, that being who you are should be a priority. She's taught me that even when you're broken and in despair, there's always a light at the end of the tunnel, and most importantly... she's taught me the true meaning of love.

She's taught me how love makes your stomach light up when you think of that very special person, or how you just want to stare at their pretty smile. How you want to listen to their melodic laugh for eternity while peppering kisses along their jaw before meeting their lips and never letting go. She's taught me that even though life can be a bitch, your circumstances or mistakes don't define you. You define yourself.
She saw me for me and loves me for it and quite honestly, I don't think it gets much better than that.

Sophie has stood by me when I've been down and she's supported me through it. I never understood how you could worry about someone so much until I met her. All I want for her is to be happy. And to have so much better than this but most importantly I wish she'd forgive herself for everything she's done because I don't she's quite done it yet. She blames herself for too much.

I feel her stir in her sleep before she gets comfortable. I assume that she's entered the land of dreams again before I feel how her breathing is no longer steady. I sit up slightly to look over at her when I see her eyelids fluttering open and shut as she blinks. I lay back down and pull her even tighter to me. I don't say anything for a while but I do rub comforting circles on her hips which I feel her shiver at.

My lips quirk up knowing I have that effect on her and it's not only the other way around.

"Are you going to tell me what happened?" I ask softly and I feel her tense for a second before she melts back into my chest. She doesn't say anything and for a second I think she didn't hear me before she croaks out a response.

"Kelcy had diabetes," she starts and I frown. Why is that important? I remove my arm from underneath her head and lean against it as I watch her. She stares straight ahead. "Courtney wanted to spike my drink and put the tablets on you so that you'd look guilty. She asked Kelcy to do it because I'd be more willing to talk to her. Kelcy was hesitant so Courtney kept forcing her drinks so she'd loosen up. She hadn't eaten the whole day or taken her insulin and that combined with the alcohol, it caused a diabetic stroke."

She ends it off so softly that if I wasn't so close to her, I would've probably missed it. I frown at her explanation. The Elite were really so desperate to tear Sophie and I apart that they were willing to hurt her in the process? I don't care that I would have been seen as the bad guy, I care that they were willing to do something detrimental to her health just to get what they want. However, I already know where Sophie's thoughts are going. I pull at her waist so that she's now on her back, rather than her side, and looking up at me. Her eyes are glossy and her lips broken from where she's bitten them too hard in attempt to stop crying.

I lean over her so that she can see me clearly.

"And you think it's your fault, don't you?" I ask and her eyes stray up to the ceiling. A tear slips out of her eye and rolls down her cheek. I feel an underlying sense of sorrow seeing her so torn up over something she didn't intentionally do. The Elite, knowingly or unknowingly, have caused Sophie to swim in so much guilt that I think it's finally gotten to the point where she can't cope with it anymore. Guilt is an emotion that tears the human being from the inside out. It turns us into cold and sad people. It takes us away from who we really are and it destroys our happiness as we think we no longer deserve it.

I wipe the tear away from Sophies face and I lean up to press a kiss on each of her eyelids. They flutter shut momentarily before I kiss her nose and hover above her lips.
"I've said it a hundred times amd I'll say it a hundred times more, this is not your fault Sophie. You didn't ask for them to do that. You know you never would so stop blaming yourself."

She lets out a shaky breath.
"It is my fault, Alex. If it weren't for me then Kelcy would still be walking."

"They've done everything they could to hurt you. Whether that be by hurting others in the process as well. The reason why you feel so guilty is because you care, Soph, you care so much that you're willing to give up your own happiness for others. You didn't ask for this, you didn't mean for this to happen, you tried to avoid it so it's not your fault. How were you supposed to know that they'd take it so far?"
Silent tears stream down her face and I find myself holding her tighter in my arms.

"I love you you so fucking much, Princesss, and because I do I need to tell you that you need to forgive yourself because you can't expect to heal and move on if you don't. The greatest thing you can do for yourself is forgive what you've done and allow yourself to be happy. Because you may love me, but I don't think you don't love yourself." I say softly and she looks to the side although I can see how her chest heaves up and down in an attempt to stay calm. Sophie needs to learn to appreciate who she truly is while letting go of everything that she's done. I wipe her tears away. "It's okay to cry, baby. As long as you do it here so I can catch the tears." I whisper and she chokes on a sob before it comes out. I cradle her in my arms as she lets her waterworks flow. I don't say anything and neither does she. Sometimes we don't want words in times like this, we just want someone to hold us while we let everything we've bottled up, let loose.

****

"Next time you decide to kick something aggressively, please choose a cushion." I mumble and Sophie rolls her eyes but her lips quirk into a small smile. I apply the ice around her ankle and I see her face scrunch up in pain. When Sophie decided to get up and go to the bathroom, she nearly feel due to not being able to walk on her right leg. She didn't go into detail as to why it's so hurt but I have a fair idea of what she did. Her ankle is highly inflamed, a blue bruise forming around it. I can tell it's not sprained due to the fact that she can move it but she did hurt it pretty bad. Nothing too serious, fortunately.

She looks around her room.
"Thank you for cleaning up my mess." She says softly and I smile.

"I left the photos that weren't torn, on your desk." I say and her eyes momentarily look there before she casts them downwards.
"You hungry?" I inquire and she nods.

"A little."

I put the packet of ice on the side of her leg and hop off her bed, stretching my arms above my head. Her eyes look at the skin exposed by my stomach for a fraction of a second too long and I smirk at her. Yeah, I caught her checking me out. Yeah, it makes my heart pound. She looks away with a blush and I chuckle lightly at her. She's so adorable.

I stick my hand out to her and she eyes it curiously.
"What are you doing?" She asks.

"Making dinner for the Cooper household."

She shakes her head. "You don't have to do that."

I shrug. "I kind of want to."

She sighs but it's one more of amusement. She takes my hand and stands up unsteadily, trying not to apply too much pressure on her ankle. I turn my back and crouch in front of her.

"Why are you crouching?"

"Hop on." I laugh.

"Are you kidding?"

I cast her a glance over my shoulder. "Nope. Not one bit."
I hear her giggle.

"You're crazy, Rosewood."

"Only for you." I flirt.

She chuckles before jumping on my back. I stand up effortlessly and make the descend down the stairs. When I reach the kitchen, I place Sophie on one of the bar stools and she leans into her palms as I stand on the opposite side of the kitchen island.
"So, what do you want?" I ask her. She thinks for a second.

"I think there's lasagna strips in the cupboard..." She trails off.

"So you want lasagna?"

She gives me a sheepish smile and I chuckle as I wash my hands before drying it on a dishcloth.
"Lasagna it is. Beef or chicken?" I ask her from where I stand with my hand on the freezer's handle.

"Mmh," Sophie thinks. "I don't think we have beef so chicken will do."

I pull the freezer open and pull out a pack of chicken pieces before resting it on the countertop. I pull out the lasagna strips and a few bottles of spice before throwing it in a pan and cooking it in a spicy sauce.

"You like cooking?" Sophie asks me.

"It's okay, I guess. I had to learn to cook when my dad left us and my mom was always working." I respond as I stir the chicken.

"Oh, I'm sorry." Sophie says sympathetically.

I lean over the counter, resting my face on both my hands as I stare at Sophie's lips.

"It's alright. I found someone to teach me about love anyway."

She laughs, leaning closer.
"Is that so?"

I cock my head to the side. "Yep."

She grins before closing the distance between us and I can't help but feel that she's what makes life worth living for.

Hello my lovelies! How are you?

I'd like to let everyone know that mistakes and circumstances don't define who you are. Nobody other than yourself can. If you ever need someone to talk to, PM me. I don't bite :) ♡

Also, before thus chapter is misunderstood, I just want to clarify why exactly Alex said what he said about self-love. Sophie has done a lot of bad things in the past - I've left that to your imagination while giving vague ideas- and she regrets it. Sophie is ashamed of who she thinks she is and that is not self-love, guys. So, when Alex passed that comment to Sophie, he didn't mean it in a cold or mean way but rather to inform Sophie that she needs to treat herself better because it ISN'T her fault.

Now that I've cleared that up... How was the chapter? Did you enjoy it?

I hope you all understand what exactly caused Kelcy's stroke. Can you believe she's paralyzed? And how about the whole plan the Elite had to drug Sophie? Pretty intense stuff.

I'll see you all soon (Can you're believe how close Christmas is? It's insane!)

There is an author's note after this chapter so please make sure you read it! Thank you! ;)

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