Sunsets are my favorite. Every day, when evening would set in, the sun was telling me it's goodbyes before disappearing below the horizon––you see, werewolves migrate from Alaska and in the North, it can take almost a full two-four hours for the day to end. You can guess, and you are right––I like to stay up all day on the edge of Sun Lake Pack territory; my home, my pack, just so I can see the beautiful sky turn bizarre colors...colors only my eyes appreciated.

Some days, I would have to wait longer than two-four hours. This evening was another, where I sat in the snow and felt my wolf panting happily as we gaze up at the mysterious sky sheathing us onto this very Earth before us.

'What do you think it'll look like tonight?' my wolf calls out inside my head. We can talk to each other and connect, it's kind of like having a second person invading your mind, or maybe a person with a disease, well, except this was normal for werewolves.

"I don't know really, it will always be something different, like something is painting a new canvas in the sky..." I reply in a whisper. I don't want someone to come crawling out of the woods behind me and think I am "on one" because I'm talking to myself––you never know with humans, they pop out of nowhere sometimes...do they feel that way about us too though? I play with my feet, kicking the glittering snow around and creating two small snow mountains climbing to the tip of my toes and two big gaps of fresh frozen dirt exposing. "Do you also feel like the sky is taking forever to paint?" I began to stand on my feet while studying the blueness.

The sun didn't seem like it was going to set this time and I had duty back at camp tonight to practice for my big day tomorrow. My wolf didn't answer, which told me someone or something was on its way to me. I'm going to become a part of the Battle crew––the wolves who fight, hunt and protect our pack; we call it BP crew though, for short. I could hardly wait as I'm very tired, being limited to where I can go and all. Remember earlier when I told you I like to come to the edge of my territory to see the sunset? That's because it is as far as I am allowed to go until the age of one-nine; a fully grown wolf, and I...still get called a pup by some which is extremely frustrating and not to mention the embarrassment I feel for myself, second hand. I could always say it's my wolf feeling the second hand for me. 

Do they not see my progress at all? I think in frustration.

Human age and werewolf age are very different; for humans, they are considered grown up at age one-eight, and for werewolves, we are fully grown at age one-nine and so you could probably imagine how impatient I am to turn one-nine. I am one-eight as we speak. Humans though, they don't know that we exist, only that we are fairy tales told to children at bedtime.

If we sense a human on our land, we all shift into wolves and escape down the vast fields away from our homes to seem like a normal wolf pack and stepping on human territory meant shifting into people like them, except that we aren't just people. We as werewolves vow to stay harmless to humans though, it isn't a crime for them to step foot here. After all, they don't know werewolves are real...so why punish them?

It felt like my pack could hear me thinking about them when my beta came popping out from behind a large pine tree, scaring me half to death. I roll my eyes.

"Jeesh Remmie, you didn't have to come sneaking out from behind trees like that and scare me." I mumble in annoyance. The he-wolf laughs harshly and waves his hand toward the deepening forest for me to follow, as the good "pup" I am, I obey.

"Next time—try being at camp then, you should probably stay in or closer to camp until your...ceremony is over." The beta snaps, his voice deep and croaking.

I turn my head to protest but close my lips tightly and watch him swallow. Was he nervous? His Adam's apple frantically bouncing up and down and his jawbone clenching and unclenching might tell me that he could be. What is he being skittish about if so? Is that another pack's scent I can smell on his clothes? He knows I have one of the best noses in our pack.

'Suspicious...' My wolf growls. I couldn't agree more.

Instead of investigating with questions, I ignored it the rest of the way home. Alpha Vincent would have to deal with that one on his own.

I don't and would never like Remmie, and neither will he like me. For some reason we've always hated each other. Since the very day I became an apprentice at age one-five and I was awarded with a job to smell things for the pack, he was always grumpy and mean to me somehow anytime I was around him. I don't know what bothers him about me other than my special and sensitive tracking nose. Maybe he hated that I could smell where he'd been and right now, he'd gone somewhere he shouldn't have. I didn't want to look closer into the situation since it isn't my business and besides, he's the beta so of course he may have to hike trails in other territories to fulfill quests Alpha Vincent sends him off to do.

As soon as we got back to camp, everyone was giving me stern looks or excited smiles. Even though I had the best nose in the packs', others still didn't like me very much and I probably would never know why. Sometimes I would question my own worth...maybe it is my skin color being different from theirs? I am the only werewolf in my pack with a different pigment to my skin––they call it being mixed, I just say a darker pigment. My mother was fair skinned, where as my dad, he had skin the color of charcoal.

Darker pigments of the skin for werewolves was very rare, especially darker than a wolf colored like I am. Nobody knows why, but most werewolves will really discriminate against them. I've only seen one other wolf with my color, and that is Tyce; the Alpha of Dark Valley Pack. He is a Latino wolf though, so our ethnicity is far different from each other. I don't know much about Dark Valley Pack other than that they are our worst enemy pack.

    Speaking of enemies, I heard that they are the pack that invaded Sun Lake and stole pieces of our land...and also murdered both my mother and father. I don't remember much of it. I am always told by my Alpha Vincent that my mother and father fought hard to protect me and before my mother died, she wished for my current mentor Gregin to always look after me; he is like my second father. Never would Gregin allow me to go farther than I am allowed. Never would he allow me to eat last even though I may as well be the omega of my pack. Never would he let me grow too close to any werewolf without him knowing who they are as a being first.

He really is my guardian wolf, and I loved that. I love Gregin with all of my heart. Gregin keeps me going everyday, to know he is there for me—always. He tells me everyday that he feels lucky to be the one to watch me take my biggest steps of all. I do truly wish my parents could be the ones to watch me grow into a strong and mighty she-wolf...but they are dead, and sooner or later I had to force myself to get over it because that knowledge would only pull me down and hold me back from my goals and achievements.

I was always told by Gregin,
    "If you dwell on the past and let your emotions control you, nothing will get done other than you weeping in your misery for eternity." and I always lived by that...always. He was the one to help me close off most of my sad emotions, to always live in the future. Regardless of my rank as a Sun Lake werewolf. I will stay happy and count myself lucky to be alive today.

    My thoughts are suddenly interrupted. I bump into my only friend, Serenity. Awkwardly, I dust myself off, my lips reaching towards my ears grinning and a chuckle escaping.

    "If it isn't my best friend finally at home for once."

    "I know I know...I've got a lot of practicing to do today, you know––"

    "––BP training?" She cuts me off quickly.

"Tomorrow is your last day of practice...do you forget werewolves always turn into BP's on the zero-four day?..."

I facepalm myself abruptly.

    Damn!

I totally forgot that tomorrow is zero-three of the month and not zero-four. I could guess I haven't gotten much sleep being excited and staying up to watch the sky and all. Serenity looks me up and down, snickering a laugh behind her knuckles.

    "You know I know you were NOT practicing, you were out watching the sky forgetting all about training weren't you? Or maybe you procrastinated the whole time!" I place my pointer finger vertically across her thin pink lips to shush her playfully. She's good at this guessing game, but she knew me better than anyone...aside from Gregin.

    "Shh, I don't want the entire pack to know my secret. They'd hate me even more than they do, fucker." I fake scoff with a smile, gazing at my friend with such a love that is indescribable.

Serenity is my best friend and my only friend who accepts me for who I am. Her life is absolutely perfect though, far better than my own story. Both of her parents are still alive and well. Serenity and I grew up together and her parent's would also look after me like Gregin.

My friend always told me if I wanted to call her mother "mommy" too, that I was always allowed to do so, I never could though as it feels disrespectful to my biological mom. I don't hold any cruel grudges against my friend though, it isn't her fault my parents died. I'm eternally grateful that she doesn carry the same trauma that I do from missing my own family. I had no siblings like she does––she has got a brother and a sister, both two Spring seasons younger than she; they both carry like their father while Serenity carries her mother's hair and eyes. Her mane is almond brown and her iris a gorgeous hazel.

Sometimes if I didn't feel like roaming the territory to watch the sky, I would entertain myself by watching Serenity's siblings bother her; It is quite funny to see her get mad at them for pulling on her hair or snatch her food before she could take a bite and every now and then one would catch me eyeing with great pleasure only to point it out, then Serenity would come stomping herself towards me while bickering profusely, a smile plastered on her pretty face.

The memories of us being pups and having nothing to worry about will always give me peace and comfort. At times I missed being a pup...especially when the time is a tough one. Growing up was no piece of meat. It can be hard living a life as an orphan. Oftentimes other werewolves would pick and tease me for having no mom or dad, so the reminder would pierce me in the chest on a daily basis. Gregin would have to step in, giving me mercy while scaring the other pups away, this being a daily occurrence until I was one-five.

"So, have you discovered who your mate is yet?" Serenity questions, nudging my elbow with her own. We are headed over to a concession stand to catch a bite to eat.

"Mmno," I take a deep breath, smelling all the different types of meat to choose from, my favorite being the deer meat. The scent of it immediately wafts through my nostrils and my mouth waters. My eyes land on a fresh zero-one day old piece of the deer. "I don't think any he-wolf here likes me very much––and my wolf hasn't really been obsessive over anyone...yet." I exclaim softly.

I reach and grasp the meat into my palms, flopping side to side repulsively. I sat my trade: a small piece of emerald, onto the table which is horizontal of the stand, facing the he-wolf who's trading the meat to me. He gives me a hard look before nodding his head in acceptance. Serenity grabs her share with a trade as well; a piece of cow. We go to sit in front of her den-home on the dirt.

I truly do wish I had a mate, by now I should have already found a he-wolf. Unfortunately though, every mate I did have was not the one for me, they also ended up dying...very suddenly. I had two mates throughout my teen wolf seasons; my first mate's name was Justin. He was a very respectful he-wolf––just never put time aside for me, almost like he was in-love but too embarrassed to be around me in-front of other werewolves. It always hurt to get excited when he'd come home from training, only to dismiss me to hang out with his friends. One day, he was found at the bottom of the pond opposite of the forests down West and we assumed the Dark Valley pack caught him in their territory or any other mysterious reason and murdered him in cold blood. Beta Remmie still tries to convince me it might've been a warning to stay away from their territory, but I would never know for sure.

My other mate, well maybe I shouldn't call him my mate but he was found hanging on a tree branch, a wooden spear piercing through his chest and he was upside down, it was a horrifying site. Him and I were growing closer but the he-wolf never asked me to be his mate and my wolf didn't feel attached like she should. When I'd asked him what his problem was about me being his mate, he told me he simply wasn't ready and would quickly scurry away to avoid the conversation.

I'll never understand what got them killed or who did it, but Vincent became very adamant on every wolf not going alone without another and obviously I was always disobeying that rule. I mean what? The rule wasn't part of the Law of the Werewolf anyways so I didn't really care. Eventually Vincent gave up on trying to get me to listen but I always knew he sent someone to look after me secretly everytime I would go sneaking off, I'm still surprised I didn't sense Beta Remmie sooner.

It can be an embarrassment when others ask me about a mate only for me to say I hadn't found anyone worth fighting for or being with. It made any werewolf who was mateless appear weaker. I was an unwanted she-wolf and I felt like that was going to be my life forever...mateless and lonely.

"Eyyks?" My friend helps me escape my thoughts. I turn my head to watch the she-wolf dabbing her lips on the shirt she wore, wiping the bloody mess made while eating and gazing at me with her tiny tear shaped eyes. "I haven't either so don't get your panties in a twist yet, I see your face sinking with grief. We're both weird to everyone else." she says solemnly while patting and rubbing my back softly with comfort in her gleaming eyes.

'Maybe she can be our mate.' My wolf teases. I roll my eyes with a "Ts" before taking my first bite into the deer meat. Serenity is right, I needed to quit feeling sorry for myself and focus on the zero-four day, the day I've been waiting for my whole life. I don't have time to waste being upset about a mate.