PROLOGUE.
✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰
✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰

"Shit!"

You spat out a curse, your hand instinctively flying up to your mouth in a vain attempt to conceal it. By the time you did so, all the blood in your body seemed to have surged up your cheeks, turning your face a dainty pink. And while it was clear as day that you were extremely flustered, the source of this reaction was not easy to pinpoint.

One may presume that it's the shame of cursing out loud in public. However, taking a closer look, the frustration that you would usually ought to conceal was evident on your face. The frustration had been piling on for days, and now you could no longer restrain it, especially when you are finally realizing just how grave the weight of this decision that you had impulsively chosen to settle on is.

You stared, horrified at the situation, at hand before your mind went into a few more strings of curses. Shit! Shit! Shit!

Fortunately, it hadn't reached the point where you had lost your reason to your simmering emotions, thus managing to seal your lips on time before your voice betrays you. However, you still couldn't be considered calm. You knew that you had to expel these frustrations, at least in a different way, so you resorted to venting these emotions by kicking invisible pebbles off the concrete pavement.

Simultaneously, you aggressively shook your head a couple of times, distinctively firm with the decision of refusing to acknowledge it.

Because how could you... How could you even be happy enough to accept that this is now your reality? Taking a step back, you still had your eyes trained on the stockpile of collected dust that was now in the pinch of your fingers.

You heaved out a strained sigh.

Even so, that didn't mean that you had already let go of this little, hidden hope that you still held. You snapped your wallet shut before opening it. Squinting your eyes in careful probing, you quickly closed it again, only to flip it open once more for the umpteenth time.

Again, nothing.

It was an uncomfortable feeling, but your heart seemed to plummet straight down from the rib cage that it remained in.

"Fuck!"

You broke out into another curse, placing a hand on your face as you roughly smeared it on your distressed features. It was stupid. You knew very well that it was stupid, but you were still hoping—hoping that it was just your sleep deprivation messing with your mind and playing tricks with your eyes. And that you're not really in your most penurious era. Everything was just an illusion.

You even began to shake your wallet in a desperate attempt to search for any spare change. But there was neither a sight of paper bills nor metallic coins that graced your sight. Only a small speck of dust took its exit, momentarily hovering in the air before floating down to obscurity.

Your heart seemed to sink even further. Who knew just how crestfallen your expression had turned into? If your sister was here to witness all of these, she would have snorted and ridiculed you with no hesitation until you had become a sobbing mess by then. Should you be a little bit more relieved that you are no longer at her mercy?

But still...

You pursed your lips, feeling a little sting in the corner of your eyes.

Damn it. Fucking damn it!

You let yourself sharply drop to the ground as the frustrations finally overtook your mind, overwhelming your helpless soul with thoughts and worries for the unforeseeable future. However, while you were taken by anxiety, you still had no plans to return to your previous residence. Hunger was something you wouldn't usually dare to bear, but you wouldn't want to swallow your pride in exchange for the fulfillment of these depthless physiological needs.

But even so, are you really going to die like this?

You blinked your eyes as you stared at the road in a daze, reflecting on all your prior decisions and actions that had led you into this most humiliating state.

Maybe you shouldn't have spent all your money the day before. Maybe you shouldn't have spent all your money on food. Maybe, but still...

Can anyone blame you? You were hungry.

You weren't really a glutton to begin with, but it must have been the stress that drives your body to consume more than your usual limit. You just couldn't resist the urge to satiate this empty feeling that kept lingering deep inside of you.

Or maybe it's because you have nothing else to do? After freeing yourself from the burden of pressure from both academics and family, you realized that you had no desire for yourself aside from relieving yourself of the constraints of these senseless expectations.

Either way, it's human nature for people to eat when they starve, lest you die if you don't. Since you have the money, you would, of course, spend it for the sake of your good health. As a human, it was normal for you to pay attention to your body.

Considering all these factors, it was only reasonable for you to give in to your avaricious appetite. Food is where you derive your strength, and now it is your only source of comfort after you chose to depart from your household. For this reason, you couldn't live a day without eating anything at the moment, and it was very easy for you to succumb to the craving of your appetite.

You narrowed your eyes, puckering your lips into an embittered pout, as you silently observed the vehicles before you that sped by in a haste.

Obviously, the world wouldn't stop its orbit for you. Everyone was so concerned for themselves that they had no time to acknowledge or spare any concern for a stranger that they didn't know, even if the stranger was only a young, helpless girl who could do nothing but grievously wallow in her self-pity.

You released another sigh, listlessly wrapping your hands around your stomach, which had begun to softly grumble in complaint. There was a certain instance where it even let out a wild guttural noise; the volume was so loud for your liking that you couldn't help but blush and look over your shoulder for any witnesses.

Lucky for you, there was no one around.

So, is this really it?

You blinked your jaded-like (E/C) eyes, exhaling yet another breathless sigh that seemed to contain all the remaining hope that you had for your bleak future. Is this really how your life is going to end? Call her dramatic, but what if you end up in the news because of this ridiculous matter? What if you were among the headlines, sensationalized for dying of mere starvation?

Somehow, you could already imagine what the reaction of your family is going to be the moment they first hear the news of your death from the broadcaster.

Their stupefied looks slowly morphing into a nonchalant front... You could actually see your sister celebrating the announcement of your demise, while your parents might just candidly remark out just how they had already predicted these things to happen because of how simpleminded you were. After all, you were never a resourceful person to begin with and just did things mindlessly.

Your eyes started to burn from the sudden thought, while a feeling of bitterness slowly seeped its way into your heart. You could feel the tears slowly building up in the corners of your eyes, wanting to be released, but you suppressed this, forcing out a piteous smile instead.

It had been two days since you left your household—two days since you finally had enough of their treatment of you. Although your parents had never gone into violent fits, you still completely loathed the blatant favoritism that they held for your sister.

And then there was your sister, who took great pleasure in exploiting their careless partiality and habitually used it against you. She also loved testing your patience and made it her hobby to provoke you to the point of tears and loss of temper.

You had always been aware that you were the inferior sibling between the two of you, and in almost every aspect, you just couldn't be compared to her. Even so, that didn't mean that you deserved to be looked down on by her. While your sister was clearly the better daughter, that didn't give her the right to drag out all your insecurities and directly confront you with them, further rubbing salt into your wounds.

And then there were times when she could be so violent.

You slightly winced at the memories as you tightened your clutch over your sleeves.

Those awful altercations that you had been unwillingly subjected to... Throughout the years, it had never been resolved, only temporarily ceased by your parents, who would always choose to placate your sister by acquiescing to her demands and reasons.

They never bothered to listen to you, even when you had done nothing wrong. While it was clear that your sister was the initiator, they would still choose to shrug it off. You couldn't understand why they would be so considerate toward your sister, but their tolerance for your misdemeanor was notably low. In fact, you found your parents' mentality sometimes perplexing because of how they would direct their anger at you whenever you and your sister were involved in a scuffle. They were not very pleased whenever you didn't succumb to their instructions and choose to fight back against your sister's provocation, as they wished for you to humble yourself before her.

Why? Why should you always yield to them? Were all the considerations that you had given her not enough? You understood where they were coming from, but how about you? Why should you always take their faults?

You inattentively stared at the road before you, letting out a bitter laugh as you realized just how irrelevant your existence was to your family. You had never really cared about this matter, but why did this knowledge still hurt? You thought that you only needed yourself and just had to live your life the way you wanted it, but you still couldn't help but hate how unfair they were to you. Maybe you wouldn't care if your sister had left you alone. Maybe you wouldn't have realized all of this if they had just left you alone.

In conclusion, it was a toxic household.

You eventually had enough of all these constant mental and emotional baggage. It was a load that you couldn't endure to bear any longer. Maybe they were indeed right when they said that you were a very incapable person—you were so incapable that you couldn't handle them anymore, and that you had finally resolved to pack your things and escape from their hellhole.

Compared to others, your reasons for running away from home might sound a little bit childish and petty. You admitted it to yourself; your parents weren't physically abusive. They had also consistently fulfilled their familial obligations toward you and your sister. They had sheltered you, schooled you, and provided for you. And, even though they weren't that wealthy, they still tried their best to accommodate all your needs.

They were decent parents, but...

You think that you need a break. You couldn't handle spending another day with them. You were tired, and you needed some air to breathe. If you didn't, you had a gut feeling that you might just collapse soon. You knew that you needed this. Maybe... Maybe you'll return to them soon, but now is not the time.

"Meow...."

For a second, you were startled but quickly composed yourself upon seeing that it was only a cat. To be specific, it was a beautiful doll-faced Persian cat whose fur was as dusky as midnight. Contrary to its coat, its eyes were a luminous shade. Its eyes were so golden that they had caught you off guard, especially when it stared straight right back at you with no shame. For some reason, you could even inexplicably feel the curiosity brimming in those irises.

"Meow."

You snapped out of your daze when it meowed at you again. You scrunched your eyebrows in confusion. Was it asking for food? But in this current state of yours, it was very impossible for you to indulge the cat's request. Unfortunately, your leather wallet was empty, while your backpack carried nothing but clothes. You would love to feed it, but right now you don't even have the means to sustain yourself.

"I'm sorry," you softly whisper. A tiny, depressive smile settled on your lips as you mulled over your current pathetic situation. Since you had nothing else to offer, you could only gently stroke its head as your act of compensation. Fortunately, the cat didn't seem to care about the matter as it even leaned closer to your touch, softly purring.

You fondly smile.

To be honest, you had always preferred dogs to cats, but right now you seem to be turning into a cat person. You didn't know that they could be so adorable, especially considering they were more known for being more restrained than their canine counterparts. Brushing the soft black fur with your fingers, you looked at the Persian cat with affectionate eyes.

For a moment, your hunger seemed to be temporarily forgotten as you indulged yourself in showering the cat with sweet affection.

You were so charmed by its loveliness that you nearly pulled the cat into your arms and embraced it. It was a good thing that you were still able to control yourself, and you didn't accidentally scare it off. You only carefully stroked it on its chin and the back of its ears, which you had observed to be its sweetest spots.

While you were having the time of your life, you suddenly recalled a thought: Wasn't there a belief that proposed that cats carry some luck? You recalled a thought while absentmindedly trailing your fingers from the cat's head down to its back.

Maybe you should wish for a blessing.

But..

You sighed, hesitating. Luck doesn't exist in this world, right? While your parents were superstitious, you couldn't really consider yourself one. You had always been skeptical, even with the concept surrounding religion. So you weren't completely convinced of the credibility of this myth, but maybe...

The cat suddenly purred loudly, making you give it a look of doting helplessness. "You wouldn't mind giving me some luck, would you?"

Your voice was soft and hesitant when asking. And while talking to a cat may seem like a ridiculous scenario, you thought that it wouldn't hurt to ask. Plus, it wasn't like you were taking this seriously. It was just a moment of your silly outburst, your inner child briefly exhibiting since you had temporarily let go of its restraints when you had decided to fondle with the adorable creature earlier.

The cat blinked its aureate eyes at you as if it were pondering your eccentricity. However, it also didn't take too long for it to meow as if it were acknowledging your wishes.

But since you were only human, you could not grasp what it was saying and could only presume through its social cues. But in spite of the language barrier blocking you from completely comprehending it, for some reason you were still hoping that it had sympathized with you at this very moment.

You softly smiled. "Thanks."

"Meow."

Okay. You are probably going nuts now. Maybe your family was right in saying that you are an absolute fool who couldn't survive long in this cruel world. You breathed out a sigh and continued to fondle with the cat to your heart's content.

When you finally had enough, you decided to release it from your hold. It didn't take too long for you to slap those hands that had been occupied with stoking the cat onto your face, each coming from a different direction, before you proceeded to aggressively pinch your flushed cheeks with the intent of admonishing yourself for your nonsense.

And yet, despite that, while you were persecuting yourself, you still couldn't help but observe the cat as it strutted itself in departure. As its small figure slowly vanished from the distance, a look of yearning had seemed to settle on your features. Unconsciously, at that moment, you also failed to realize yourself subconsciously murmuring a small prayer, deep inside the chambers of your restless heart.