Grey on grey. The clouds swiftly moved across the bleak fall sky with the stiff breeze. Varying shades but all muted. Kind of like the noise of the traffic from behind the trees. Although they were on the edge of a busy street, the line of trees and slight embankment dulled the din of the endless cars and trucks. The geese made a pulsing v formation heading south against the chilling wind.

Their tent was somewhat intact, although there were several layers of tarp above it to help prevent the weather outside from coming in. The rain fly didn't last more than a few weeks, but makeshift shelters have makeshift solutions. There were layers of blankets, clothing, and newspaper in the tent. Anything for warmth. For comfort they just had each other.

It hadn't always been this way. For anyone in their position it hadn't. Every homeless person had to come from somewhere and each had their own story. Some of woe, some of heartbreak, some of defiance, and some of survival. This is not a story of survival. For many it isn't. Life doesn't last long in the cold January winters against the harsh elements and risky, scary decisions.

But this was only October, and the leaves were still falling, risk of frost still a few weeks away. Comfort this morning was in a tight spooning position inside a new sleeping bag. New to them at least, the fresh laundered scent unfamiliar within their tent. Scavenging through the donation bins outside a charity had yielded some good results the night before. They didn't see the harm in stealing from the bins, the goods were supposed to be going to people like them anyway. The less fortunate, the needy, the hapless, the homeless. They were the people most often walked by, driven by, stared through, or ignored all together, unless people were hurling abuse at them—that sometimes happened too. The invisible population, which truly was far more visible than the government or neighbours wanted.

The two met on a bench in a park one night when Jeff had too much food. Too much food. A luxury that seldom occurred out here. But it was food and it wouldn't keep, and Jeff had noticed someone else, someone different, on the bench by the forest's edge. In the offering, a conversation had been struck and an agreement reached. After all, two was better than one, safer than one, and both were more than enamoured with the other. Not that it was love, or even lust, at first sight. And the relationship worked. Had worked. Did work.

They became inseparable except in the most dire of circumstances. A unit, a pair. Partners after a time. Lovers after awhile. Similarities in age, circumstance, and vocation made for strong connections. Jeff was newly turned 18, gay since forever, and homeless for just over a year. His parents couldn't have a gay son, so they simply didn't. They caught him with his first boyfriend on the couch in the family room giving away his virginity to someone he thought was worthy. Jeff left amongst bellowing and yelling and threats, and a final 'fuck you' from him, and a 'you're dead to us' from them. They simply didn't have a gay son any longer. If there ever was a time their paths crossed, he was just like every other invisible street person. They never looked, he was too much of an embarrassment.

Parm's story was far different, but he would never tell. He'd never share, not all of it. Jeff may share his bed and his heart, but he would never share his secret, his shame. He left at 17 and never looked back. Never could. Got on a train and travelled to an unfamiliar place far away, but known for it's homeless community services and large population where he could just blend in. Fit in. Parm wasn't stupid, he wasn't dumb, he really wasn't anything to anyone, but he was a planner. So when he left, he was gone like a puff of smoke or the innocence of a child in a house of sinners. He was lost to them, just like his virginity was gone in some terrible event where it wasn't so much lost as it was taken.

Jeff was able to keep his dark hair in a stylish cut due to the trade of services with a worker in a salon nearby. Every few weeks an expert blow job was exchanged for an expert coiff. Both parties satisfied with the deal.

Parm preferred his hair long and unstyled except for the occasions when he'd tie it back in a low ponytail. Parm's locks were flowing, wavy, and corn-silk blond, and he liked to use them as a curtain to hide behind, allowing admittance to his dark sapphire eyes only when he felt like it. Jeff was the only one with a free pass, and even then entrance wasn't a sure thing.

Parm used his hair to hide, and Jeff respected Parm's right to privacy. So many things out here weren't private. Toileting was a public matter. Shitting in a public park behind a tree, like a dog, was a public matter, as was urinating, vomiting, and all other manner of human waste. Seed was spilled here too, whether purchased or not.

For the first little while the men, really not men, really only 17 and 18, children still by some standards, but men by experience, were together only every once in awhile. They may have slept together on a daily basis, but only slept together on occasion. But then the need grew stronger, feelings became greater, and their relationship was cemented. Firmly. Not friends, not fuck-buddies, but lovers. Boyfriends, partners, more. And then they were never apart except when working. And working was a necessary evil. It had to be done and money needed to be made. Food and supplies bought and paid for with their flesh. It was the only thing they had to offer, since neither finished school or had the address required to obtain legal employment.

Homelessness is a vicious cycle; no job without an address, no address without a job. Parm knew when he left he was leaving a roof over his head, but the alternative was still his preference. The roof came with conditions he just couldn't handle any longer. Jeff, born into more privilege, didn't fully realize his plight until he spent his first night truly under the stars in a park, where the drop in temperature had him shivering. The next day, he stole into the family garage and took what he could before walking away, pride intact. Although his first boyfriend wasn't the person he thought he was, Jeff still couldn't pretend he was the son they thought he was.

On days when food was needed, which meant nearly every day, both would make themselves presentable using a bathroom at a local coffee shop and the small bag of toiletries they shared. Neither needed to shave often, making grooming easier. Parm would help style Jeff's hair and apply a little bit of eyeliner. Jeff would brush Parm's tangles away and kiss his fingertips. They had an area they frequented, surprisingly close to Jeff's father's office, and would often earn quick cash from businessmen needing release before heading home for the day. Parm, with his long hair and delicate features had a few regulars and often attracted men who were definitely not gay, they just liked blow jobs from the effeminate teen.

Jeff had a bit of a harder look, formerly a football player, with a stockier frame, although now too thin to be buff. His appeal was different than Parm's, but men appreciated his skill with his mouth and his tight, rounded ass. The eyeliner he sported caused his dark eyes to pop against his pale skin and he still was able to give off a youthful vibe that brought him money.

October was getting too cold, the commuters walking too fast to get out of the chill, for the pair to be as successful as the summer months, when an alleyway was more than warm enough for a pull. Now consideration must be given, and there were only so many warm subway grates to be had. The pair floated an idea to pool their money and rent a cheap motel room, but that would take them far away from their regulars and their comfort zone.

After a particularly unsuccessful rush hour, the pair moved to the entertainment district a few streets over. Even if they were unable to secure johns, they could ask for leftovers from the wealthy patrons leaving the fancy restaurants before heading to the theatre. This had been Jeff's trick, something he observed when he still lived with his parents and they were approached for their leftovers. While his parents had scoffed, Jeff gave his uneaten portion to the panhandler, and their gratitude was palpable. Little did he think that in only a year, it would be him asking for food from people who probably lived in the same part of the city as his own parents. Although he was fairly certain he'd never be recognized, he often nudged Parm to ask when the people looked remotely familiar. This was how he'd had the extra food the night he met Parm, and they begged for food at least a few nights a week.

It was shocking, the excess given to them. Sometimes steak, lobster macaroni, delicate sautéed vegetables, dinner rolls of delightful flakiness. When given these doggie bags, Parm was in heaven. It was better, more expensive, fancier food than he had ever seen in his whole life. Families with kids were easier targets than older people—some even resorted to violence, kicking or spitting at the pair for simply asking for food. When successful Parm could pretend, even for a little bit, that his life was more, that this was his food, that he'd paid for it and had the kind of life where this sort of luxury was a given. For Jeff, although the food was good, it left a bitter taste in his mouth. A taste of the life he'd left behind. Luxurious but fake, stable but stifling. What made his parents think that their life was the right way and who he loved was wrong?

Soup kitchens existed in the city, so why beg for food rather than go where it was free? It was simply a matter of distance. No one wants the homeless in areas frequented by the well to do or tourists, so shelters and soup kitchens were found in areas where the land was cheaper, rents lower, streets less safe, and violence higher. Not that they were that far from the area they frequented but far enough that Jeff and Parm lacked easy access to handouts.

On this particular October night, Parm had a bit of a cough. Nothing horrible, but bad enough for someone without id, without a health card, no insurance, no access to a doctor. Coughing chased off tricks and frightened people who might give them food. It was a difficult day money wise, but Jeff managed to scrounge free food, so he left Parm outside the pharmacy for a moment while he took some of their money to buy medicine. Not too much, but enough to help ease Parm's discomfort. Before going to the checkout, Jeff also got some orange juice and a can of chicken soup. Even if Parm couldn't have it warmed up, it could still be somewhat soothing.

When he exited the store with his purchases, he took Parm's hand, and the two walked back through the streets to the park and their hidden tent. Jeff went into their makeshift house and got a thick woollen blanket to wrap around themselves. It was something he'd actually stolen from his parent's garage, and was, at one time, a long time ago, something his grandmother had given him before she passed away. Its one time white wool was now a permanent dingy yellow, and the bright stripes were muted.

The two men wrap themselves tightly together in its warm weft. Parm opens the takeout containers and they are pleased to see some garlic mashed potatoes, roast chicken, broccoli, and a few bits and pieces of other things. Each of them carefully uses their hands to partake in the repast, carefully savouring every morsel, licking their fingers clean. Then Jeff pulls the orange juice and medicine out of the bag to treat Parm's illness. He doesn't seem to have a fever, but things can turn bad when exposed to the elements.

"Drink this all and swallow the pills, Parm." Jeff pressed the items into Parm's shivering hands.

"I can't take all of this, it's too much, Jeff. You must have spent all the money," Parm protested, but to no avail. Jeff had his way, and the juice was consumed, medicine taken. The two sat together, studying the patterns their breathing made in the chilly night air. The swirling motif against the sky made Parm reminisce about something from his childhood. He and one of his younger half-sisters in the backyard laying out in a pile of leaves, giggling and studying the sky, ignoring the noise, mess, and confusion in the house. While it didn't happen often, every once in a long while Parm felt nostalgic for a time gone by.

Looking down at the blanket, and knowing it's origin, he couldn't help but ask, "Do you think they miss you?"

Jeff didn't even have to ask who Parm meant. "No." He took a deep breath and shrugged. "After I left, I called a few times. They hung up when they heard my voice." The truth stung, burned, ached, every time he thought of it, not dulled by time or distance. The people who were supposed to care for him the most, didn't.

"No one misses me either," Parm whispered into Jeff's shoulder, facts and truth, before breaking into a wheezing series of coughs. Although perhaps maybe one of his step-sisters might remember him fondly.

Jeff protectively wrapped his arms around the slightly smaller figure and pulled him even closer, willing the coughing to stop. "Come on, let's get you to bed." And with that, they both stood and entered the tent, nestling into the covers and blankets, making a little den, curled together against the chill. The gentle lull of traffic in the distance soothed them to sleep.

In the middle of the night, Jeff awoke to a frigid breeze and the sounds of muted coughing. Parm had gotten up to relieve himself and was outside the tent, the flap open to the elements. Jeff rose and went out to relieve the needs of his pressing bladder, all the while happy to be able to check on Parm, his concern evident.

"Are you okay?" Jeff asked gently, his voice carrying across the frosty grass. The moonlight lit the icy tips like glittering candles, causing their meadow to have an almost magical glow.

Rather than hazard more coughing, Parm just gave a soft nod, his hair hiding his face from view. But he couldn't hide that his body was wracked with shivers.

Jeff sighed, wishing Parm was less selfless. "Come on, Parm. You need more medicine."

Parm nodded again, following Jeff back into the tent and taking the offered pills with some very cold water from the bottle in the tent. Jeff was satisfied by this and again pulled his lover close, planting a light kiss on his cheek before wrapping them tightly together once more.

After two days of taking extra care, Parm was recovered enough for the pair to resume their daily schedule. Their food and money almost depleted, they need to get back to work.

The day was one of those glorious fall days, warm and sunny, with an undercurrent of chill, but still nice enough to be without coats or long sleeves. It was warm enough that Parm could pull a lot of customers eager for one last go in the alley, now dotted with fallen leaves in riotous colours. The leaf piles of his childhood now were called into duty as pillows for his knees while he serviced horny businessmen. His brush with illness left him slightly frail, this vulnerability making him even more alluring for some of the sick, sad, or desperate fucks he serviced.

After a few hours, the two teens took to the mall, a large imposing structure often frequented in the evenings by tourists or students from the local residences for the downtown colleges. Sitting at a table in the food court, they both nursed coffees and combined their earnings.

"This is probably the last really good day we'll have outside all year. Weather's gonna turn," Parm said, between sips.

"Do you want to try to find a hole?" Jeff was thinking of abandoning the tent over winter for an empty building. While it was warm enough in the nylon shelter now, as long as they were bundled up, the nights were still only hovering around freezing. It was going to get colder, a lot colder, and soon.

"They just aren't safe. If we can find them, so can anyone else. Do you want to be able to sleep soundly or with one eye open the entire time?" Parm was making a very good point. People who lived in abandoned buildings often started fires to keep warm, making the buildings death traps if someone passed out. They could never be sure that they were the only residents of any place they'd find. Not only that, the two younger men were prime targets for some of the more unsavoury people that would steal whatever they could in order to survive. Their tent was well concealed and the park was less likely to attract other residents in the winter, while an abandoned building was always somewhere people looked for shelter or to scavenge. "Besides people winter camp all the time. And winters are so much warmer here than where I grew up."

Although Jeff knew Parm was right, and he really didn't want to have to worry about being robbed all the time, he also wasn't fond of endangering Parm's health. Even though it was a few degrees warmer than farther north, inside was still warmer than outside, no matter what. "Whatever you want. I'll be with you." Jeff reached across the table and placed his hand on top of Parm's squeezing gently. Parm rewarded him, by glancing up from behind his hair and giving Jeff a sweet smile, his twinkling eyes full of love.

"How did I ever get so lucky?" The tender sentiment was heartbreaking. They were not lucky. They were simply surviving. But Jeff understood Parm's meaning and his heart beat just a little faster, overcome with a rush of emotions.

They both visited the mall's bathroom facilities before heading on their way, deciding to forgo any more chances for income. Instead they decided to spend the evening loving each other, fulfilling their own needs instead of others. Their tent was awash in love, lust, and the noise of the two men feasting on each other's bodies. Both taking turns to taste their lover's stiff rods and creamy rewards, then rutting together in a crescendo of moans. Jeff entered Parm slowly and surely, taking him sweetly and with love, unlike their customers. The two kissed and touched and hugged while they fucked. Made love. Chest to chest, lips to lips, soul to soul. Although they were always careful to use protection when screwing for work, together they went in bare, nothing between them.

Parm was overcome with emotion. Tears flowed from his eyes while his spunk dampened their stomachs. The clenching was too much for Jeff, and he quickly followed Parm, releasing deep inside his boyfriend. As he leaned down to kiss the passionate tears from Parm's cheeks, he whispered, "I love you so much. I never want to be without you."

Parm's lips skimmed across Jeff's jaw with a promise, "Never Jeff. I'll never leave you."

They quickly cleaned up as best they could, then redressed, bundled up, and curled together, sleeping soundly, arms and legs intertwined.