chapter two:
crème de la crème

⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊

To welcome everyone into the Good Place, one of its most esteemed newcomers is throwing a party. The hostess has requested formal dress for the evening. Now, Beth didn't plan on bringing her flashiest attire to Heaven when she died, but luckily this place seems to have it covered — she opens her (tiny) wardrobe to find a silky, mid-length dress in soft blue waiting for her.

     Sanjay must have had the same treatment, because after some crashing and censored cursing as he changes, he emerges from the minuscule bathroom looking sharply-dressed in an immaculate suit and tie.

     "You look very... dapper," says Beth.

     "So do you," Sanjay smiles and offers his arm to her. "Shall we go?"

     With a sheepish nod, she hooks her hand into his bicep and falls into step with him as they get ready to leave home. Beth has one foot outside when she freezes and slaps a hand to her forehead. "Oh, fork!" she exclaims, panic setting in.

     "What's wrong?"

     "My inhaler, I always bring it with me. Wait... where would it even be?"

     "Maybe you should ask?" Sanjay suggests.

     "Ask who?" Beth asks, before the penny drops. "Oh. I see. Hey, Janet?"

     "Hi, how can I help?" Janet materialises beside her with a resounding boop.

     This is still so bizarre.

     "I can't find my inhaler anywhere," says Beth, "so I was wondering if I have to ask you or Michael for it? Is there a prescription I need to get, or—"

     Janet shakes her head gently. "No need. The Good Place has a filter which soothes many chronic illnesses in its residents, one of which would be your asthma. You won't have to worry about it anymore."

     "... Seriously?" Beth is stunned by this revelation. No more inhalers or asthma attacks? It sounds like a dream come true. And yet, at the same time, it feels like a strange anti-climax. After learning to live with it in her everyday life, she can simply forget about it in her afterlife? She lets out a shaky breath. "Right. Well, thank you, Janet."

     "Any time!"

     Boop! Janet vanishes into thin air once more.

     Now that she and Sanjay are stood outside, Beth can hardly believe they both fit in that tiny house. It seems like a strange place to spend eternity — but then again, is she complaining? Of course not. When she reminds herself of how the universe seemed to pair her with someone as perfect as Sanjay, it boggles her mind. Maybe there is a perfect reason why that house suits the pair of them...

... Regardless, Beth can't help but feel a sting of jealousy when they reach the eyesore that is the hostess's house. Can they call it a house? Mansion would be more appropriate. A giant crystallised chandelier hangs over the foyer, amidst the marble pillars and tall floral arrangements. Somewhere, a classical string quartet is playing, other guests from the neighbourhood flooding in up and down the stairs. If this home was catered to its owner's personality, then Beth lets her imagination run wild with who it could possibly be.

"Bloody hell..." Beth whispers in awe, "I think our house could fit in this room."

Sanjay scoffs, wide-eyed. "Forget that. Our house could fit in this one's bathroom, probably."

Amidst all the bustle of the guests, Michael appears in his suit and grins delightedly at the couple. "Welcome, you guys!" he greets them. "So glad you could make it, this is all... well, it's a little overwhelming."

You're telling me, thinks Beth, glancing up at the decadent chandelier.

"I have some people I'd like you to meet. Come on, follow me..."

He leads them through the crowds and up the stairs, where another pair of soulmates wait for them. One of them appears meek and silent, an expression of serenity on his face as he stands in silence... but it is the tall brunette stood next to him who makes Beth do a double take. She recognises her. All she can remember is glistening magazine covers by the supermarket checkout, and this woman's face emblazoned on them.

"These are our wonderful hosts for the evening, Tahani Al-Jamil and her soulmate Jianyu Li," Michael gestures to them. The name-drop just confirms that Beth was right and her mind is only further boggled. While this is not the first celebrity she expected to encounter in the Good Place, there could have been many worse ones. It suddenly explains the eyesore of a house.

"Tahani? As in, Kamilah's sister?" Sanjay lights up, excited to recognise her.

"... Yes, that would be me. Tahani."

"Oh, your sister is incredible," he rambles, "I think everyone in my field would agree that the healthy eating campaign she led in 2012 was such a game-changer. I mean, world class—"

"Sanjay..." Beth whispers softly; she cannot help but notice how taut Tahani's smile has grown, trying to be gracious but clearly not enjoying the incessant praise of her sister. "Well, I can't believe you're actually... here."

"I know! This place is simply divine, isn't it?" says Tahani, perfectly eloquent. "And I've been to Johnny Depp's private bird sanctuary."

The name-drop seems to blindside Sanjay for a moment as his brows shoot up. Meanwhile, glancing to Tahani's soulmate, Beth suddenly feels guilty that no one has properly said hello to him yet. "Nice to meet you, Jianyu," she smiles at him. All he does is shut his eyes and give a gentle bow in response.

"Ah, yes," Tahani clutches Jianyu's arm and pulls him closer, "I forgot to mention that Jianyu is a Buddhist monk. He took a vow of silence that he is still upholding, even now in the Good Place. It takes such remarkable... dedication..." She says the last part with a slight strain in her voice, much like the one she had when Sanjay was praising Kamilah — sugarcoated sweetness to the max.

     "Well, it's so nice to see you both, but there are so many more introductions to be made!" Michael claps his hands together and ushers Beth and Sanjay along again, as if directing traffic.

     They soon find themselves in a lavish room filled with buffet tables. Everything from crudités and canapé sandwiches, to a towering chocolate fountain with strawberries to skewer and dip, the feast is certainly something to behind. The sweet aromas entice Beth further inside, but clearly that isn't why Michael took them here. He instead leads them over to one of the tables where a pair of soulmates are sitting alone — one of them Beth instantly recognises as Chidi, the indecisive neighbour from a few hours ago, and feels a swell of relief at a familiar face. But the woman with him is new, petit with a black cocktail dress and bright blonde hair pulled back into a bun. Chidi is currently lecturing her on the stacks of shrimp she is hoarding from the buffet:

     "— Can't you just leave some shrimp for everyone else?"

     "This is literal Heaven, man! Y'think they're gonna run out of shrimp?"

     "Ah, there you are!"

     Chidi jumps out of his skin at Michael's greeting, as if caught red-handed, whilst his soulmate clearly could not care less. One hand holding a gilded champagne glass and in the other a fistful of shrimp, she pivots around to face the other pair. Chidi perks up as he recognises Beth, the two of them exchanging a familiar smile.

     "I'm just doing the rounds, trying to introduce some folks to each other so they can all settle in," says Michael to them. "I'd like to introduce you to Beth Ardon and Sanjay Thakkar."

     "Hiya," Sanjay grins and shakes Chidi's hand, followed by the other woman's (after she puts down the fistful of shrimp).

     "And this is Chidi Anagonye and Eleanor Shellstrop."

     "Lovely to meet you both," Beth smiles at them.

     "Now, I'm gonna leave you four to chit-chat, get to know one another while I figure out this speech..." Michael pats his breast pocket, as if searching for flash cards. "Oh boy, now I get why you humans panic over public speaking so much. Wish me luck!"

In a flash, Michael whisks away in a tall, suit-clad blur of grey. Eleanor lets out a slightly drunken hiccup, much to the visible pain of Chidi — they do not seem to be clicking quite so immediately. Beth finds, guiltily, that it makes her feel better about things with Sanjay.

"So, uh, what did you guys do on Earth? Career-wise?" Chidi asks, eager to stop Eleanor from talking.

"I was a dietician," says Sanjay meaningfully, "I did a lot of work improving school meals to become more sustainable and nutritious."

"Oh, wow, that's amazing. Where did your work take you?"

"In the UK, at first, but then I branched out to take my work around the world."

     "That's incredible. And Beth, you were...?"

     "Um, real estate agent," answers Beth, somewhat sheepishly; it seems to pale in comparison to Sanjay's work

     "Oh... nice!" Chidi nods, still impressed nonetheless.

     "There's three of you here?" Eleanor suddenly blurts out, slightly slurred. "Tahani and you guys... with your little accents..."

     "Excuse me?" Beth laughs in confusion.

     "Pip pip tally-ho—" she exclaims in questionable Queen's English, before being cut off.

     "Anyway!" Chidi looks mortified, although he doesn't quite know what to follow this up with.

     "What about guys, what did you do?" asks Sanjay earnestly.

     Since Eleanor seems incapable of talking coherently at the moment, Chidi takes over: "Well, I was a professor of moral philosophy and ethics," he says, and immediately something switches in his eyes. The real passion and pride for his work is clear in one, single expression, and Beth is equally delighted and left wondering what that must feel like.

     "Wow, this place must be Heaven for you... literally!" Beth says.

     Chidi grins and replies, "I know! I've been pursuing the fundamental truth of the universe for years, and now I can finally learn about them—"

     "SHRIMP!"

     "Eleanor, what—"

     "Shrimp re-fill, man, we've gotta go," Eleanor starts pushing Chidi towards a different buffet table now. "It was nice meeting you dorks!"

     In a whirlwind, Chidi and Eleanor are gone, leaving Beth and Sanjay alone for the first time in a few minutes. She only wishes it didn't feel as awkward as it does. For being thrown into a huge party as each other's dates, she knows barely anything about her soulmate beyond his career choices. Nor does it feel like the right place to start asking the more personal questions...

Instead, they do the rounds and talk to some of their other neighbours. Each one's story is as incredible as the next, including:

(1). Bambadjan, who spent half his life in North Korea fighting for women's rights, and the other half in Saudi Arabia fighting for gay rights.

(2). A woman who helped lead an initiative that dug up over a thousand unexploded land mines surrounding an orphanage.

(3). A man who offered to donate both his kidneys to someone he'd only met on the bus ten minutes prior... you could take a wild guess at how he died.

By the time they have reached one of the smaller living rooms in Tahani's mansion, the pair are talking with a nurse who died while helping fight a deadly epidemic. "I don't regret it one bit," says the nurse, once she has reached the end of her story. "It was all worth it if it meant one more of those tiny little faces could live to see a long, fulfilled life."

"That's... wow," Sanjay whispers; he almost sounds choked up.

Beth is just as deeply touched by the story, shaking her head in awe. "Nurses deserve so much more for everything they do. My nan was a nurse, actually."

"Oh, was she?" the nurse brightens up.

"Yeah... she was."

Her beloved Nan. Although it has been years since she peacefully passed, Beth still feels a lump in her throat when she thinks of her. Fond memories flash by of afternoons spent at her house after school, raiding the biscuit tin and doing jigsaw puzzles. She would share stories of her youth, sometimes more light-hearted, and others more serious in the subject matter — Nan's nursing days could cover both in equal measure.

"Well, at least the appreciation came eventually... I got into the Good Place!" the nurse cheers. "It feels pretty rewarding after everything."

Beth nods gingerly, before a daring thought strikes her: Could Nan be in the Good Place too? There could be so many people, surely, who made it in here. Not just the more obvious choices. She finds her heart swelling and doing somersaults at the thought, so much so that she lets out a stunted gasp that jolts her champagne glass. But before she can do or ask anything, Michael is gearing up to make a small speech to the room.

     "You all know that I am the architect of this neighborhood. But what you don't know is... golly, I'm not supposed to tell you this, but– um– oh, what the heck?" Michael lets out an exhilarated laugh, as if adrenaline were coursing through him at the announcement: "This is actually the very first neighborhood that I have ever designed. I had been an apprentice for over two hundred years, and my boss has finally given me my first solo project!"

     Everyone breaks out into applause, the architect beaming humbly at the praise.

     Michael then grows more earnest, adding, "And you deserve a perfect world because every single one of you is a good person... that's it for me. Back to you, Tahani."

     "Bravo, Michael, bravo!" Tahani steps in with a round of delicate applause. "I would just like to quickly say if any of you would like to play tennis tonight, we have thirty-six regulation grass tennis courts. Such fun! Cheers!"

     Now is her chance. So as the final round of applause dies down, Beth takes an encouraging sip of champagne and whispers to Sanjay that she'll be right back. She meanders past the room brimming with her new neighbours until she reaches Michael — she finds him occupied with the chocolate fountain, in awe of the mechanics.

     "Evening, Michael. Me again," Beth introduces herself. "Congratulations on your first neighbourhood, by the way. I wouldn't have guessed this was your first one."

     "Oh, Beth! That's very much appreciated, thank you."

     "I just have another question about the Good Place."

     Michael grins at her. "Of course. Fire away."

     "At first I only thought about more famous people who might have gotten in here. But then I started really thinking about it, and realised there could be people I know in the Good Place as well." Beth takes a deep breath, hoping to soothe her restlessness at the thought of reuniting (or meeting) long-lost loved ones. "Take my nan, for instance, could she be here? Okay, maybe not this neighbourhood, but could I—"

     "Ah, no, I'm gonna have to stop you right there," Michael shakes his head solemnly. "You have to understand that this is a very selective system. Only the crème de la crème of humanity gets into the Good Place. I'm afraid there are a lot less people in this place than you might realise."

     Beth's shoulders drop, a frown tightening her features.

     "So, what you're saying is..."

     "Nan is in the Bad Place. Yes."

     "The Bad Place?"

     "But hey, don't think about that too much," Michael puts a reassuring arm around her shoulders. "Remember: you got into the Good Place! You led a life that put enough good into the world, and it led you here. You should be very proud of that."

     Easier said than done. The architect's casually cheery disposition leaves Beth in a ruminative daze, one that doesn't leave her even on the way home. It isn't just the fact that Michael not-so-graciously told her that her grandmother was in Hell — and probably countless other people she thought wouldn't be there either — which was upsetting enough news in itself. It was also the fact that it made her seriously ask herself the question:

What am I doing here?

Beth cannot recall anything she did in her life, which was half as remarkable as giving both her kidneys or digging up land mines. If this place really is reserved for the upper echelons of humanity, she can't help but doubt whether she can match their level.

It is still weighing on her when she steps back through the door at home. "You alright?" Sanjay asks, tilting his head at her. "You've been pretty quiet all the way home."

"I'm alright. Just... tired." Beth then grimaces, remembering the sleeping situation. "Look, you don't have to sleep downstairs, it's not—"

"Don't say another word! It's all taken care of. Hey, Janet?"

Janet appears with her hands pinned behind her back. "Did you want that thing you asked for earlier?" she inquires politely.

"Yes, I would." Upon Sanjay's command, an inflated mattress appears on the kitchen-slash-living-room floor with a boop. "Cheers, Janet."

As Janet leaves, he sinks onto the mattress and tests his bounciness. Eventually he seems to notice the guilty look on Beth's face.

"Beth, I'm fine," he assures her. "Just get a good night's sleep, alright?"

"... Alright. G'night, Sanjay."

"Goodnight."

Giving in, Beth pivots on the spot and starts climbing up the stairs — but not before she hits her knee on the side of the kitchen counter.

"Forking hell—"

✮

Beth had the strangest dream... she had woken up in Heaven, been told that she died and was paired with a handsome soulmate to live the rest of eternity with.

She knows it must have been a dream, anyway, because the thumping bass of an Ariana Grande song wakes her up the next morning. Probably the noisy neighbours again. But the music choice is strange — Beth is more accustomed to them blasting rock songs in the mornings, not chart-topping pop tracks. It is the crack of thunder which startles her to fly up in bed.

THWACK!

"Motherforker!" Beth swears, hand slapping against the throbbing patch on her head where it hit the ceiling. She groggily opens her eyes to take in her surroundings. This is not her flat in Surrey, The low ceilings, the flat bed, her feet almost touching the edge of the mezzanine... it all comes back to her. This tiny house, the Good Place, Sanjay.

This must somehow be real.

Still half-asleep and disoriented, Beth crawls along the first floor and climbs down the stairs like a ladder. "Sanjay? Sanjay!" she calls out. She almost trips over him on the floor, the long-limbed man curled up on the inflatable mattress. He awakens with an abrupt snore and squints at her. How has he not been woken up yet? "Sanjay, where is that music coming from? Is that you?"

"Of course it isn't," he murmurs.

Beth does a double take as he removes his duvet. "What are you wearing?"

She cannot take her eyes off Sanjay wearing what might be the ugliest pyjamas she has ever seen — navy blue and yellow zig-sagged patterns, starting to look more like an optical illusion the longer she looks at them.

But instead he sits bolt upright, suddenly wide awake as he stares at her. "What are you wearing?"

"What?"

"Look in the mirror!"

Beth glances over at the bathroom mirror through its open door, catching a glimpse of herself — only now does she realises she is wearing the same pyjamas as Sanjay. But how? When? Although that becomes less of a concern when she looks out of the windows, Sanjay stood beside her looking just as flabbergasted.

It is absolute mayhem. The sky is alight with whistling fireworks, snowing glittery confetti onto the grass as colossal ladybirds and formations of flying shrimps adorn the clouds. Beth and Sanjay go outside to investigate and find everyone else wearing the same pyjamas as they scurry around in a panic. In a bid to calm everyone down, Michael issues an emergency meeting with the residents. But the journey itself is treacherous, the pair almost being trampled by a giraffe and a giant pill bottle rolling down the street on their way there.

When finally inside the safety (they can hope) of Tahani's mansion, the residents are keen for answers. This does not seem like Beth's idea of Heaven.

Needless to say, Michael is panicking considerably. "Obviously, there's something very wrong with this neighbourhood," he admits, voice cracking. "We don't know what it is, how long it will last, or what caused it. What do we know, Janet?"

     "We know where it happened," Janet says, calm as always. "Here!"

     "Yes, thank you, Janet. The chaos happened here..."

     "No shirt," Sanjay mumbles under his breath.

     "See, that's the trouble with these perfect systems. One little flaw can lead to—" Michael gulps guiltily. "Well, it can lead to Gary over there."

     Right on cue, everyone turns to look at the resident named Gary, whose had the brunt of the neighbourhood glitch; his head has been replaced by a Picasso-like version that blinks and grimaces in abstract expressions.

     "Hey Gary, hang in there, buddy... boy, my armpits are leaking," says Michael nervously. "What is that called again?"

     "Sweat," Janet answers.

     "Right, right. Still not used to being in a human body. And what do you do with sweat? Do– do you lick it away, is that right?" Michael then proceeds to lift his armpit and start licking the fabric of his shirt rather frantically. Beth's eyes widen like saucers. She has seen a giant frog and a bed of tulips fighting each other this morning, and yet this is by far the strangest thing she has witnessed.

     "No, you dab it with a cloth," Janet pulls out a cloth identical to the zig-zagged pyjamas.

     "Oh, right. And then you lick the cloth?" he asks, licking it after swiping his armpit with it. "That seems weirder."

     Beth and Sanjay exchange a look; something about the puzzlement on his face cracks her up, snorting as she struggles to stifle a laugh.

     "Michael, look!" Tahani suddenly exclaims. Surely enough, her pyjamas are magically melting away, revealing the stylish turtleneck, skirt and heels she is wearing underneath.

     "Okay. That's a good sign. It– it could mean that this is almost over!"

     Giving a toss of her glossy hair (which almost hits Sanjay in the face), Tahani remarks, "Oh, such a relief. That was my first time as a fashion 'don't' and I did not care for it."

✮

Once the bizarre kick-off to the morning has subsided, Day Two of orientation begins. Michael had gathered the residents in the town square to announce that flying lessons would be taking place — but it was Tahani who stood up and suggested that some volunteers helped to clean up the mess from the morning. Beth and Sanjay were among those volunteers (admittedly for the former, the thought of soaring that high in the sky with no clear harness freaked her out, and Beth Ardon has always ended up first in the line... thanks for nothing, alphabetical order).

Besides, there is something almost therapeutic about helping clean up. Once she gets into a rhythm, Beth is quite happy piling things into bags and chucking them into the bins. She and Sanjay pair up to help clear the area near the frozen yoghurt café.

As she struggles with one particularly heavy bag, Sanjay intervenes. "Here, let me help you with that," he smiles and takes it from her, slinging it effortlessly over his shoulder.

"Oh, thanks," Beth chuckles. She feels her cheeks flush slightly warm.

"It looks like we're almost done with this lot. We can look forward to those flying lessons then, eh?"

"Yeah... maybe..."

"What? You've never wanted to soar like a bird through the sky?" Sanjay asks incredulously.

"Of course I have!" Beth exclaims, "It just... looks a bit daunting."

He gives a carefree shrug. "I always wanted to fly. You know, if I had a superpower."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I probably read too many comics as a kid. What about you, what would your superpower be?"

Beth clicks her tongue against the roof of her mouth thoughtfully. "Ooh... it would have to be time travel, I think."

"See, that is something I wouldn't want to mess with," he grits his teeth, "all the laws of time and space being tampered with like that."

"I just think it would be nice to go back certain places in time," she elaborates. "I might not even change anything, I'd just... experience it again."

His expression softening, Sanjay nods. "I can understand that," he says quietly.

This is nice, Beth can't help but think to herself. This is the kind of conversation she has been craving with Sanjay ever since meeting him yesterday. If they really are universe-approved soulmates, she wants to know him inside and out. There has just been so little opportunity to have a quiet moment alone until now. They drop off the bin liners in a skip just outside the frozen yoghurt café — outside, Michael is dining with Tahani and Jianyu al fresco.

"Hiya, Tahani! Jianyu!" Sanjay waves happily.

"Oh, hello you two!" Tahani greets them, whilst Jianyu focuses solely on his frozen yoghurt. "We were just taking a little break with Michael. He's feeling a little off-kilter about the glitches in the neighbourhood, so we thought we would treat him to a refreshing frozen yoghurt. What flavour did you get, Michael?"

"No flavour," the architect bitterly drops his plastic spoon. "It's all I deserve, really."

"Michael, that's not true—" Beth begins to say, but he cuts her off.

"Look, I– I appreciate you trying to cheer me up. I really do, but you don't understand. This was the very first neighbourhood that I got to design. It was my chance to prove myself, and now I've blown it."

     "You know, sometimes a flaw can make something even more beautiful," says Tahani wisely, "like with Cindy Crawford and how short she is."

     "Oh, Tahani, if I made one tiny mistake in my design, if there's a single glitch in the system, if even one blade of grass is angled a fraction of a degree off, the whole neighbourhood is compromised..." Michael's face suddenly drops sinisterly. "Whose dog is that?"

     Beth looks around. "What, this one?" She points to an innocent-looking Maltese puppy, sitting like a white snowball in the middle of the cobbled street. Her first impulse is giddy joy at seeing the puppy, but Michael's is the complete opposite — he goes into panic mode.

     "Guys, whose dog is that? Whose dog is that? See, this is one of those glitches I was talking about..." Michael runs out into the street with a fiery look of determination in his eyes; one that frankly scares them all. "Nice try, puppy!"

     What he does next, Beth could never have seen coming.

     Michael takes a run-up before kicking the puppy like a football. It goes flying sky-high into the air, whimpering helplessly as it hurtles further and further towards the sun... then exploding on impact with a distant, pathetic poof. Beth's jaw could not be dropped any lower, whilst Sanjay has covered his face with both of his hands in horror.

     What. The. Fork.

     "Whew! That was a close one," Michael dusts himself off with a chuckle.

     Behind him, a woman comes running out of the café, stumbling around confused. "Teacup? Teacup?" she turns around to Michael and asks, "Hey, have you seen my dog?"

     "Oh God!" Beth whispers high-pitched, her toes curling inside her shoes. No, no, no, no, no...

     Of course, Michael cannot hide the truth from her. A few minutes later he tries to break the news as gently as possible to the woman.

     "So here's the situation, Pevita. I kind of kicked your dog into the sun..." Just as she lets out a horrified gasp, Michael pulls another Maltese puppy out of thin air. "But I got her back! Everything seems fine."

"Teacup, thank goodness you're okay!" Pevita sighs, cuddling the puppy as she growls and whimpers in her arms.

No shirt, Beth thinks, I'd be growling too if I'd just been kicked into the sun.

"Everyone, it is merely a construct of a dog," Michael informs the concerned crowds surrounding them. "It feels no pain or joy or love."

"Teacup doesn't love me?!"

At Pevita's retort, Michael freezes. "... Oh! Oh, no, no, no, no, no, it definitely feels love. Do you actually want a dog that loves you a little bit more? Because I can kick her right back into the sun and get you another one just like that—"

"No!"

"Oh boy, I'm making things worse..."

Michael doubles over, clutching his chest with laboured breath. It seems eternal beings really do carry the weight of the universe on their shoulders. Beth reaches a hand out to rub his back soothingly, but when she has barely made contact, a Subway sandwich (seemingly from nowhere) smacks the pavement at Michael's feet. Then it is followed by an empty coffee cup, and a rotten chicken drumstick. Jianyu points his hand up to the sky — charcoal-black clouds churn and seem to be raining waste down on them all.

"It's raining garbage!" Pevita cries.

Everyone starts flocking to take cover, dodging falling bits of food waste, cardboard and plastic raining down on them. Beth and Sanjay run towards the nearest shop to take shelter — yet another frozen yoghurt café — but jiggling the door handle is no use.

     "It's locked!" Sanjay yells above the trash storm.

     Beth scans their environment, noticing a large awning over a shop titled Hugging Bears. "Over there," she cries, "we can take cover if they aren't open!"

     They sprint past the chowder fountain just as a large turkey lands and splashes their shoes. When they reach the awning unscathed, Sanjay stands underneath whilst Beth also tries jiggling the door handle. Still nothing. Why is nobody open right now? She tries knocking on the door and yelling, but the shop-owner is too busy gazing lovingly into the eyes of a pink teddy bear.

     "LOOK OUT!"

     Before she can blink, Beth feels her arm being tugged roughly under the awning. Her body thumps into Sanjay's chest just as a fork of lightning hits the spot where she'd just been standing. She clings onto him for dear life as she re-gains her balance; chests heaving together, catching their breath. Beth glances up and locks her gaze onto his. For the first time, she really notices Sanjay's eyes. They appear so dark, almost like obsidian, in a way she has never seen in anyone else she knew on Earth.

     She is in no rush to let go of him.

     The trash storm subsides after some time, but it backpedals all the progress on clearing the neighbourhood. Additionally it has injured many of the residents who took flying lessons. As a result, Michael calls to ban flying for 1,000 years and sends everyone home for the day. Beth can hardly complain about that — today has been much more exhausting than she could have anticipated.

     In fact, she is relieved to get back to their tiny living home. She collapses onto the sofa with a loud sigh. "What a day..."

     Sanjay perches on the end of the sofa and folds his arms. "Let's see: we've been chased by giraffes to Ariana Grande, we've seen Michael kick a puppy into the storm, and we've almost been knocked out by a rotting chicken drumstick. Just another Tuesday in the Good Place."

     Beth laughs and rubs her eyes tiredly. When she removes her hands, he is gazing at her.

     "Listen," Sanjay touches her knee with his hand, filling her with warmth, "if the neighbourhood is back to normal, why don't we do something together? Maybe we could spend a nice day downtown and get to know each other a bit better. All I know about you so far is that you're a time-travelling real estate agent."

     "And you're a flying-superhero dietician," she grins; but then it slips away, a shyness creeping into Beth's voice. "I would love that, though. Just a normal day."

     "Cool. Then it's a date."

     A date?!

"We'll do something nice, I promise," Sanjay says.

     "Great..."

     Beth tries to swallow the burst of joy she feels at hearing the word date, while Sanjay wanders into the bathroom and starts softly humming 'Break Free', crystal clear even with the door shut.

⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊

A/N:

for some reason i was really struggling to write this chapter, but we made it eventually! maybe because it's only season one and knowing what comes later in the show, some of it feels anticlimactic right now. beth's having a bit of a bumpy start to her time in the good place, but could things be looking up soon? we have barely scraped the surface when it comes to these characters and the story, so buckle in...

how are we finding the story so far?? this chapter was going to be a little more in depth, but i was aiming to get it out before a certain date and the scenes actually carry over better into chapter 3 anyway. thank you for reading!

p.s. while the johnny depp and cindy crawford lines are obviously from the show, i've got so many ideas for tahani name-drops to use in this fic. i sat for about an hour one night coming up with them, and it was SO FUN. keep your eyes peeled for those in future chapters.

( PUBLISHED: 30th April, 2024 )