The auditorium was filled with murmurings and giggling but everything got seized the moment Divi, The school SPL began to speak.

Divi: Every child has his/her/their own capabilities. Don't make them lose
self-confidence and regret it later. A warm welcome to our respective Correspondent, Principal, Teachers, Parents and my dear students. On this auspicious day, I would like to
grab your attention on the topic "Sibling Differentiation."
I call upon Lilly to apprise us of some facts on this topic.

Lily: Hello everyone, I will tell you about the facts and myths.

First Born Children Tend To Appear More Intelligent Than Their Siblings

However, note the word appear The firstborn child often seems to be smarter than their later-born counterparts, and IQ tests seem to support this theory.
However, this seems to be an environmental cause rather than a genetic one.

Kids born first tend to occupy their parents resources by themselves for a longer period  at least until the
second child is born.This means the second child is competing for time and resources with the second child, and
one-on-one learning time with their parents is limited because of it.

Therefore, the first-born tends to have a more attention-focused start to life, and have an easier time at school for the first few years of their life.

The Younger Children Can Be People-Pleasing, Or Manipulative

The youngest child in a larger family can be the one who sometimes manipulates others into getting what they want. This seems like a negative personality trait, however in young children, it is quite normal and healthy.
The youngest child is often physically smaller than the older ones andtherefore relies ondifferent techniques to get what they want from their older siblings, as they dont have the ability to physically match their siblings.

The Order In Which Your Children Are Born Has A Profound Impact On Their
Psychological Development

Unfortunately (or perhaps, fortunately), a 2015 study of over 20,000 people have determined that there is no correlation between the order of a child's birth and their personality either while growing up or as an adult.
This study demonstrated that no lasting impact could be found between a child's position in the family and their personality.

The Middle Child Is Always The Friendliest And Has A Large Social Circle

This one is false again. Middle children tend to have average amounts of friends and also display normal amounts of friendliness towards their peers.
Some Differences In People's Personalities According To Birth Order Can Be Found This is another one that is debunked. Not only doesn't the birth order show any significantpersonality differences. It shows no minute differences either.

The effect size of a study of 377,000 high school students demonstrated a 0.02 effect size in the correlation between birth order and personality.
This means if you sat three people down, you have no chance of discerning whether their personalities make them a first, middle, or last-born child.

Therefore A Natural Genetic Correlation Between The Child's Birth Order And Their Innate Intelligence

This statement has again been proven false. There is a difference between IQ points in first and later-born children.
The IQ point difference is only 1 point, which means it is small but significant.
It's enough of a difference that researchers have been interested in discovering why it happens. The general consensus is that it is nurture, rather than a natural correlation.
A natural difference would mean that there is some innate genetic difference that makes second and third-born children slightly less intelligent than their older siblings, but this has
been disproven.

There's a natural genetic correlation between the child's birth order and their innate intelligence

It is a case of nurture resulting in differences in IQ. The older the child, the more time they benefit from their parent's one-on-one attention, and the privilege of tutoring and helping
their siblings.

Parents Change Parenting Styles To Suit The Birth Order Of Their Children

The idea of birth order has largely been disproved. Therefore there's no real need to change your parenting style or techniques from child to child.
Children born in different orders don't need to have their perceived personality types groomed or cultivated. However, you'll likely change your parenting with every child anyway- rectifying the mistakes you may have made, and refining the fine art of parenting!

Children Will Benefit From A Smaller Family Size

This is another false idea coming from the theory of birth order. While the statistics show that
the firstborn is on average one IQ more intelligent than other children, this doesn't come to the detriment of their siblings.

Socialisation with siblings is extremely important. Siblings are some of the most important people while growing up, and while not having them isn't detrimental, there's no link between family size and social outcomes for children.
No matter what order your children are born in, they all have the same outcomes and abilities in life.
Their personalities are shaped by peers and social interaction, and as is widely agreed upon in modern scientific discourse, the order of your children's birth does not correlate with their
behaviour and personality. Thank you all.

Divi: Thank you so much, Lily, That was indeed a great message. Now, I like to invite Abiba to narrate a tale on "Sibling differentiation."

Abiba: Hello dignitaries, Let's just get right into the tale.

Nivi and Nikhil are both twins and Nikhil is the elder one, he was 2 years older than Nivi. Nivi was in grade 10 whereas her brother Nikhil was in grade 12.
"Nikhil, what happened to you? Why did you become like this? Just look at your score. What Nikhil? Are we sending you to school by paying so much fees for these marks?", his father
asked, looking at his weekly tests report card.

" Dad, I can explain ", he tried to speak.

" What will you explain Nikhil? That you did not understand that concept or you were sick? What is it this time? For heaven's sake Nikhil, why don't you concentrate on your studies
instead of surfing on that phone for hours? Just look at your sister, how sincere and obedient
she is", his father spoke pointing out towards his sister.

Nikhil didn't speak back, he kept mum and walked away from there. The same evening when he was studying he heard his father shout again, he sneaked out of his room to see his sister standing in front of their dad, her head hanging low.

" Why did you go to that party late at night Nivi? Do you think you are some man and can roam as you wish? Who will take the responsibility if something happens? You had the date to lie to your parents also. At least look at your brother he would at least shout where he is going and then go even though he doesn't study well he does it. Learn it from him", he shouted on Nivi while teardrops fell from her eyes

In both the cases of Nivi and Nikhil, they felt the same thing when they were compared to their siblings. Not only them, anyone would feel frustrated when this happens.

Take criticism positively, but it isn't simple all the time. Everything has a limit so does the comparison between the siblings.
Dear parents, please try to understand and stop comparing among your children and do not discriminate against any of your kids. They are special in their way. Good day, all.

Divi: Wow, The tale was amazing and so relatable. I could see some kids wiping away their tears. No worries kid, Everything will be fine. A next, I call Mags to give us some examples of
the negatives of differentiating Siblings.

Mags: Hi, Welcome everyone!!

There are many examples I could use to describe how horrible comparing siblings to each other is, but I think this list is the best way for every one of us to learn

1.   A parent may say that one sibling is smarter or a harder worker. It is always better to encourage them to work hard so they can reach their own potential instead of having them think they need to live up to their siblings.

2.   They could simply say, Try to behave more like your sibling. The children take that as wish you were like your sibling.

3.    Then, there are the times when a parent wants their child to learn from something another of their children is very good at. Parents think that the child needs a role model, so they tell their child to follow in their other child's footsteps. What they don't know is that this can be harmful!

4.     Many parents focus on the talents they find especially good in one of their children and try to force it upon their other child/ren so that they can have that good skill/talent/characteristic as well. But, what they should do is pay attention to each child's characteristics and talents as they already are. They should work from those to help their child grow to their fullest potential.

5.   Other times, parents see themselves in one child more than they do in another, so they become a favourite.
All of these are just sooooo bad for a child to experience. There are many possible outcomes, most of them bad, that can come from these. Here are some:

1.     It damages the child's self-esteem. They feel like they are inferior to their sibling. Their parents are telling them that they aren't good enough. This results in insecurity.

2.     The child will become jealous of their siblings. Their parents have shown them all their lives that their parents love their siblings more. This instant ally creates a rift between the siblings, which can result in envy and jealousy.

3.     The child can grow hostile in resentment towards their siblings. This is because they feel inferior, so they try to fill in the gap between their siblings' statuses and theirs. But, it's not to improve their growth but to beat their siblings at something.

Stop comparing your children, there are many more things that are going to affect
them and this will affect them more than anything. Thank you.

Divi: Thanks Mags, I hope at least from now on our dear parents would start reflecting on their deeds and change themselves. Don't be the reason for your child to become insecure, if they fail to, pat them and encourage them for the next time.

If you are considering changing your thoughts, kudos to you. Lastly here are some tips for the lovely children on how to face differentiation and get out of it,

— Don't Take It Personally.

— Find Support Elsewhere in Your Life.

— Don't Perpetuate Sibling Rivalry.

— Accept the Reality of the Situation.

— Invest In Your Own Family.

— Get Additional Support If Needed.
Each child is here in this life to be themselves.

Thank you, everyone.

See ya'all in the next Alpha to omega.

TeenFix.

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