Sorry no cover art for this one I'm lazy

~~

I never really enjoyed my job. Who does? So when my band took off I was more than thrilled to be able to actually live my dreams performing onstage. It was a thrill, nothing made me happier other than being with my husband, Gerard.

We were just married, still in that honeymoon phase where everything was bright and sweet. We didn't go on an actual honeymoon but we took a few days on the beach together. It was more than I could ever hope for. Being with him is what made my life whole.

"This next song I wrote for a very special man in my life," I said into the microphone, squinting against the bright stage lights. "He couldn't be here tonight but maybe if we all sing loud enough he'll hear it."

Everyone cheered and I barely even got the first lyric out of my mouth before my manager, Jamia, hurried on stage, tapping my arm. I frowned in confusion as she pulled me off the stage and took my guitar from me.

"Mia, people here wanted to see Pencey, nothing stops the show," I said.

"Frank, your phone was ringing—"

"Ignore it," I interrupted. "Probably just some sales call anyways."

"No, it was the police," she said. "They called, your husband is in an ambulance on the way to the hospital."

My stomach dropped and bile rose into my throat that I tried to choke down.

"Wh-what—" I cut myself off, my head spinning.

"Frank, I think you should sit, you look pale," jamia said.

She guided me to sit down on one of the speakers, instructing someone to get me a bottle of water.

"What—"

This time the bile really did end up on the floor, my grilled cheese sandwich lunch looking like globs. I drank some water, tears running down my face.

"He's fine, right?" I asked. "I-I'm overexaggerating? M-maybe he just had an allergic reaction, he gets them all the time because he's allergic to shellfish but loves shrimp. They're always minor."

"Frank, he was shot," Jamia said gently.

"No, no," I denied, shaking my head. But that shaking just made me dizzy.

"Let me take you to the hospital," she said.

I stood up but my legs felt numb and I would've fallen if one of the stage hands hadn't caught me. It took three people to help me into the van. I couldn't even think or speak straight.

"M-mugging?" I asked.

Jamia bit her lip. There was something she wasn't telling me.

"H-he's dead, isn't he?" I asked.

"No! No," she denied quickly. "Maybe it would be best hearing it from the police."

"I want it from you, one of my best friends," I said.

Jamia paused for a moment as we slowed to a red light. "Frank, you remember that guy who gave Gerard those flowers?"

I thought back to about two weeks ago when Gerard came home with flowers. Apparently some random dude gave it to him to cheer up his day or something.

"Yeah, what about it?" I asked.

Jamia sighed as she pushed the pedal when the light turned green.

"His name was Ryan, he was in love with Gerard," she said. "Apparently he's been stalking him for a few months. He came into Gerard's work tonight and one of his coworkers said Ryan asked him out Gerard said he was married. Ryan wouldn't take no for an answer. So... h-he shot Gerard, then shot himself."

I shook my head, wiping the tears off my cheeks.

"They're wrapping up the show and everyone is getting refunded," Jamia said. "You just focus on yourself and Gerard. Everything is gonna be okay."

We got to the hospital and I ran inside to the desk.

"My husband—he was shot, G-Gerard Iero-Way," I said.

"You must be his husband, Frank," a police officer said as he walked up to me. "When you have a moment, I'd like to ask you a few questions."

He walked away and the nurse looked up from the files.

"Your husband is currently in surgery, a doctor will be out soon to update you shortly," she said.

I sat down next to Jamia, burying my head in my hands. The room was practically spinning. Jamia rubbed my back in small circular motions in an attempt to calm me down.

"Frank, it's gonna be okay," she said.

"You don't know that," I sobbed. "You don't know that he's going to be okay. What if he doesn't make it, Mia? Wh-what if we don't even get to celebrate our first wedding anniversary?"

"You will," she stated.

I wiped my eyes, trying my hardest not to cry more because it was starting to give me a headache and I didn't want anything making this night even worse. I laid my head on Jamia's shoulder, a hand softly grasping the cross necklace around my neck. I began to pray, something I hadn't done since I was a boy. But I prayed to the god I still believed in that Gerard would be okay.

"Mr. Iero-Way, is this a good time?" Someone asked.

I opened my eyes and looked at the officer in front of me.

"I know you're going through a lot but this would be of great help to our investigation," he said.

I nodded my head, letting go of my necklace.

"Would you like to go somewhere more private?" He asked.

"I-I don't think I would be able to stand at a moment like this," I said.

He nodded and sat down, pulling out a picture of a boy with brown hair.

"I-Is that—"

"Ryan Ross," he finished. "You've never seen him before?"

"No, never," I stated.

"We searched his apartment. It was filled with photos of Gerard he had taken," he said. "Journals were filled with writings about how he was in love with Gerard."

"Who is he?" I asked.

"A nineteen year old boy, him and Gerard had gone to the same school, he was a few years behind your husband but apparently he has been fond of him since then," he said. "Ryan was in therapy, he suffered from mental illnesses but it's clear that he had stopped taking his medicine."

"He's..."

"Dead," the officer finished.

I nodded, crying. "So? Nothing happens then? He's dead so he gets no punishment and Gerard is just hurt?"

"Ryan's family reached out," he said. "They feel worse than you could imagine. They want to pay all Gerard's medical bills and extra. In their own words they were indebted to you."

I nodded, and the officer pulled a little baggie out of his pocket.

"Here, it's Gerard's ring, I didn't want it to get lost," he said.

I took the ring as he left, looking at it before I slipped it onto my finger next to my own wedding ring.

"It's gonna be okay," Jamia whispered. "Let me get you some water."

She went up, talking to the receptionist before she went around the corner, coming back with a small paper cup of water. I took little sips but couldn't bear any more as I set it down on the coffee table in front of us.

"When is that fucking doctor coming?" I asked.

It was like someone could hear me when the door opened and a doctor walked through. He talked to the receptionist before coming our way. I stood up but a wave of nausea washed over me and I sat back down. The doctor sat down on the coffee table.

"Your husband is almost out of surgery," he said.

"Is he okay?" I asked.

"As of right now, there has been no complications with the surgery," he said. "He lost quite a bit of blood but people on the scene responded quickly to help him.

I nodded. "How soon until I can see him?"

"When the surgery is over he will be moved to the ICU and you'll be able to visit him then," he said.

I took a deep breath. "So, he's going to be okay?"

"As of right now, it seems as though everything is going to be fine," he said.

He left us alone and for the first time tonight it felt like I could actually breathe.

"See? Gerard's gonna be just fine," Jamia said.

I nodded, standing up. I began to pace, thankfully feeling my legs again but everything soon faded as collapsed to the ground.

I woke up in a hospital room, looking around at the white walls.

"You okay, honey?" A nurse asked. "You fainted."

"I-I'm fine," I said. "What time is it?"

"It's four in the morning," she said. "Your husband is out of surgery. If you're up for it then I could bring you to see him."

I nodded, standing up. We walked through the maze of hallways and elevators before finally arriving at the ICU. I ran over when I saw Gerard laying in his bed asleep. I sobbed, holding onto his hand.

"The surgery was successful," his doctor said. "He should be waking up from the anesthetic soon."

I nodded and he left me alone. I waited by Gerard's side for two hours listening to his heart beat on the monitor before he slowly stirred awake.

"Baby, oh, baby," I muttered, kissing his forehead. "It's okay, you're okay. Don't get too stressed out. You're in the hospital, do you remember what happened? Some officers are probably going to want to talk to you."

I ran my fingers through his black hair gently. It was matted in the back, like something wet had dried into his hair. It took me a moment to realize it was blood from when he got shot.

"You're okay, baby, you're okay," I whispered, tears running down my cheeks.

"I love you," he said, his voice raspy. "So much. More than anything."

"I know, baby, I know, I love you too," I said. "To the moon and back. Don't talk if it hurts. It's okay, you don't need to say anything right now. Let me go get the nurse and some water."

The nurse came to check his vitals and came with a tray of food and a glass of water.

"Gerard is on a liquid diet but the food is for you, Frank, you've been here for so long, you need to eat," she said.

"Thank you," I said before she left.

I held the cup for Gerard as he sipped through the straw.

"Thank you," he said.

I smiled, holding his hand.

"I didn't ruin your show, did I?" He asked.

"You're such an angel," I said. "My show is not important compared to you, seriously. Don't you worry about my show, just worry about yourself. I almost lost you."

He smiled. "You can't get rid of me that soon, not before we finished having our argument."

"Argument? What argument?" I asked.

"Whether we were going to get a cat or a dog," he said.

I chuckled. "Dogs are a man's best friend. They care for you like a cat could never."

"Says someone who has no clue what a cat is like," he said. "I say we get a cat and then a dog and maybe...a baby?"

I smiled, nodding my head.

"We can do whatever you want," I said. "For a moment I thought I wasn't going to be able to do any of that stuff with you. I was so scared, Gee."

"We are going to do all of that stuff together," he said. "I can't leave before we even have our one year anniversary."

"How can you be so brave during all of this?" I asked. "You have no idea how much of a mess I was. I had fainted. I was throwing up. I could barely stand."

"I'm glad you seem to be doing okay now," he said. "The boy, who was he?"

"Gerard, I don't think you should worry about that now," I said. "Just worry about you and about getting better."

"I just want to know, Frankie," he said. "He looked familiar."

"The two of you went to school together," I said. "Ryan Ross."

The name was bitter on my tongue.

"Oh yeah, he was three years behind me," he said. "I was a little behind so I was in a lower math class, he sat behind me for one semester. It was weird. It always seemed like things in that class would go missing. Like pens and notebooks. One time even a piece of chewed gum that I spit into a piece of paper."

"He was probably taking those things," I said. "He was obsessed with you for years. Let's just forget about that. When you heal let's go somewhere nice, somewhere you've always wanted to go to. We'll finally go on a real honeymoon. Maybe we can take a little cruise together."

"That sounds nice," he said with a small smile. "I've always wanted to go on a cruise."

"I know," I said.

I leaned over, giving him a soft kiss. He smiled as I laid my head on his shoulder.

"This doesn't hurt you at all, does it?" I asked.

"No, baby, I'm okay," he said. "I'm not in that much pain."

"Probably the medications they have you on," I said.

Gerard nodded, squeezing my hand gently.

"Is everything okay?" I asked.

"Yeah, just wanted to let you know I was getting sleepy again," he said. "I think I'm gonna take a little nap. You should eat, you look a little pale still."

"Okay, I hope you have sweet dreams," I said. "I love you."

"I love you too," he said.

Gerard slowly drifted off and I ate my plate of food before moving to sit on the bench in front of the large window. I curled up before I too ended up asleep.

It was dark when I woke up and I looked around. Gerard was asleep still and I kissed his forehead before leaving the room.

"Has he been asleep the whole time?" I asked a nurse.

"No, he woke up a bit and talked to the police. He's been up on and off all day," she said. "How are you doing, hun?"

"Just looking for the bathroom," I said.

"Right around the corner there," she said, pointing in that direction.

I smiled and used the toilet before heading back to Gerard. He was awake now, playing with his fingers.

"Frankie, did you call my parents or brother?" He asked.

I patted my pockets before sighing.

"I have no clue where my phone is," I said. "I never grabbed it before leaving the venue. Jamia must have it."

"It's okay, I'll just use the hospital phone," he said. "Could I please get some water?"

I nodded, going to the vending machine when I realized I didn't have my wallet either. I never keep it on me when I'm performing. I went to the desk and asked the lady for a cup of water, which she gladly gave me. I went back and Gerard was already off the phone.

"My mom is on her way," he said. "She's freaking out."

I gave him a soft kiss, holding his hand.

"It's gonna be okay now, I'll cancel the tour and stay here to help take care of you," I said.

"You shouldn't—"

"You can't stop me," I interrupted. "I love you, and I will never ever leave your side."