Sohan stepped through the colossal wrought iron gate and looked at the old, one-storied building that stood alone on the vast field. He read the big signboard that hung from a pole beside the front porch, revealing its identity to the newcomers: 'Sraddha Old Home, Savar'. Sohan took a deep breath, exhaling all the weariness and filling his lungs with all the good memories and small happiness he could manage to accumulate. He was going to see his mother! It had been almost three months since he had seen her last.

After signing the register and waiting for a few excruciatingly long minutes, Sohan finally saw his mother enter the waiting room. His heart thwarted as his gaze met hers, and his whole world seemed to stop. His mother seemed to have grown old in just three months! There were signs of aging all over her face, and he could also spot fatigue crawling on her beautiful face. Although her skin had loosened and she looked much more fragile than the last time, her skin radiated the same soft glow, which compelled Sohan to believe that he was home.

"Ma!" Sohan said with much difficulty, his voice quivering. He had felt desolate all these days, and this small word seemed to fill him up, making him complete again.

"Sonu! How are you, son?" Rahela Begum could not hold her tears back anymore. She took the few remaining steps that was separating her from her son, and hugged her son as tightly as she could, sobbing in his shirt.

"Happy birthday, ma!" Sohan finally spoke after a few minutes. Rahela patted his back.

"You shouldn't have come! Did you leave Ruchita alone at home?" she wiped the few drops of tears from her face, and smiled in the way that always lit up Sohan's world.

"Don't worry ma. I told her that I had a meeting, and I won't be home till nine," Sohan stole a glance at his wristwatch, it was seven. He still had some time before he would have to leave this place. Journeying to the heart of Dhaka from Savar took at least two hours, and he knew that he had to hurry, but he did not say this to his mother.

"Look what I got you!" Sohan stuffed the packet of sari in his mother's hands. He watched her open it and smiled when her eyes grazed the peach Jamdani sari. Those were always her favorite.

"It's beautiful, Sonu!" Rahela said gleefully. Sohan's eyes brimmed with tears, but he looked away to hide them. He didn't want the priceless smile of his mother to get lost behind those tears once again.

"Did you talk to Shabab bhaiya or Rumana api?" Sohan asked. He always insisted his mother to buy a mobile phone, but she always preferred the landline of the old home more than "those technological gadgets" that she was certain she would never get the hold of.

"Yes, they had called when I was praying. Maybe I'll be around to receive the next time," Rahela caressed the fine fabric of the sari.

After a few more minutes of chit-chat, Sohan stood up.

"I have to leave now ma," he stated in a glum voice. Ruchita must be waiting. It would take him more than two hours to reach home.

"So soon?" Rahela asked, her eyes ablaze. There was so much pain in her eyes that it was unbearable to look at them for too long. But a sudden meekness came over her as the whole situation dawned on her, and she nodded.

"Ma, please eat! You look frail," Sohan pointed at the cotton sari on her body that was doing nothing to hide her fragile framework, revealing her true condition. Rahela said nothing, but smiled in answer.

The goodbyes were never pleasant, yet Sohan had to choke back his tears and depart, leaving a piece of his life behind that was half his world, the reason of his being. As the cold January wind slapped his face through the window of the bus he sat in, Sohan's mind wandered to the memories of his past, and he wondered when he would finally be able to stop tormenting his soul each time he left his mother behind for another few months.

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Copyright © 2013 Mehnaz Tabassum All Rights Reserved
Chapter published on September 13, 2015

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