(My friend helped me with a bit of this, so I'd like to thank her for that)

Tord POV

I woke up to the sunlight blinding me. I felt like my head was pounding. I had another nightmare when I fell asleep. This time Pau and Pat abandoned me and left me to die. I sat up on my bed, trying to ignore any pain I felt. I was successful. I heard someone knock on my door and someone say,

"Tord? Are you awake?"

"Yeah, come in," I answer.

The door opened to reveal Pat, who walked in. He came up to me and hugged me.

"Are you ok, Tord?"

"Umm, I'm good. Why?" I ask, kinda confused.

"Well, you weren't doing so good late night. I just wanna make sure you were alright. By the way, Tord, did you get anymore night terrors?" Pat asked, slightly concerned.

The memory of Pat comforting me back to sleep flashed across my mind.

Of course he would be concerned about that.

"I...I did, but it is not of your concern."

"Tord, I just wanna make sure you're ok-"

"I'm fine. You don't need to worry about me all the time. So please stop smothering me with attention. I don't deserve it!" I snapped.

Once I heard Pat gasp, I realized my mistake of saying what I just said.

"U-uhh Pat just forget what you just heard ok?"

"Forget? Forget!? Tord, I can't just forget what you just said. Is that what you think Tord? Do you think that you don't deserve love and care?" Pat asked, heartbroken.

"I-I...."

"Well, What is it!?"

I couldn't think of an excuse to make him forget about what I said so I just said,

"Yes, it's true."

I couldn't look Pat in the face after saying that. I just didn't want to see how heartbroken he was. I heard sniffles and then Pat said,

"I... I'll go make you some breakfast. Please don't think like that Tord, cause me and Pau care deeply about you."

I heard shuffling and then my room door closing. I couldn't help but feel guilt. I should've kept that to myself, I'm such a fool.

A few minutes past by and Pat came back, followed by Pau. He was the first to speak up.

"What did you do to make Pat cry!? What did he ever do to you?"

I guess Pat didn't tell him. Figures, he wouldn't want to make anyone feel heartbroken as well from what I just said.

Pat put a hand up to Pau as a way of shushing him. I could tell he was angry at what he said. He turned back to me, handing me a plate with bacon and pancakes.

"You must be hungry right?"

I was super hungry. My face brightened up.

"Thanks Mom."

I was about to start eating, when this 'voice' stopped me.

Do you really think you deserve to even eat? After all that pain you caused to your friends?

I... I didn't mean to do it though.

But you did it, didn't you? You were the one who destroyed their house.

No stop.

You were the one who said that you wasn't friends with them.

Please.

AND YOU WERE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO KILL TOM!

"STOP, I ALREADY FEEL GUILTY FOR MY MISTAKES! STOP TRYING TO MAKE ME HATE MY EXISTENCE EVEN MORE!" I screamed.

The sound of glass shattering pulled me back to my senses. I saw that I had thrown the plate across the room, on the wall. I was gripping my hair and pulling it from stress.

Oh no. My parents are still here.

I lower my hands from my head and look at Pat and Pau, and their expressions were just heartbreaking.

Pat had his hands up to his mouth, tears streaming down his face. Pau looked shocked at what just occurred and confused.

"Tord, is this why Pat was crying earlier? Did you say something similar to this?" Pau said, voice shaking a little from sadness.

I nodded my head slowly. I close my eyes waiting for them to get angry at what I said.

I felt arms wrap around and someone sobbing on my shoulder. I open my eyes to see that it was Pat.

"Mom?"

"Tord, we love you no matter what, ok? It breaks my heart to know that you don't love yourself the same way."

I wasn't expecting this. I hugged Pat back tightly, tears going down my face. I look up at Pau.

"Dad?"

He got a bit more emotional and a slight smile was on his face. He hugged both of us, saying,

"You actually called me Dad. It's been so long since last you've called me that."

I heard Pat giggle a bit. He breaks away from the hug, pointing at Pau.

"Is that all you can think about right now?"

"What? He called you Mom first, of course I would be overjoyed to hear him call me Dad," Pau remarked.

"You are such a dork," Pat says, bursting out in laughter.

We all burst out in laughter from this silly, emotional moment, but I had a feeling that these fun times wouldn't last forever.

A week has gone by and I was able to walk around and do stuff for myself. I actually disbanded the Red Army because just being in it was making me guilty. The soldiers were confused at first, since it was so sudden. Soon, they agreed with it and was happy to go back to their families. I felt a slight feeling of happiness knowing the soldiers were gonna have a long happy life with their family, but deep down I also felt nothing.

Also, because my arm was so badly beaten up, it had become immobile. They had to cut it off and replace it with a robot arm. Now I had another thing to remind me of my mistakes.

I started wearing a black sweater instead of my classic red sweater. I was starving myself because I felt like I didn't deserve to eat and only deserved to feel the pain my friends felt that day. I would also cut myself: 1 for Matt's face, 1 for Edd, and 2 for Tom. Every night I would cry myself to sleep, just wishing I could see them again and apologize, no matter what happens to me.

Pat and Pau were trying everything to get me to open up but nothing worked. I had forgotten how it felt to be happy. The voice in my head also wasn't helping, since it always tells me what a failure I am. The most I could do was a fake smile, but I don't think it'll work on them for too long. Pat had offered up a trip for us to go somewhere one day. I don't know where we are going though, he won't tell me. I think he just planned it to get my mind off of things and possibly get me to open up to them. It won't work, nothing has.

Pat POV

I had planned to take Tord back to see his friends in London, UK. He has been a little sad and I think it's because he feels bad. I noticed that he has been wearing black a lot and when I washed his sweater it looked like there were blood marks. I'm worried he has been hurting himself. I also noticed that he had been avoiding eating with us as a family. I want to think that he has just been eating in his own time, but I fear that he has been starving himself. I can't stand to see him so miserable anymore. Neither can Pau.

We had packed all our stuff and started our trip there. I gave Tord some headphones so he can distract himself with his phone while we were going on the flight.

Hopefully he doesn't know where we are really doing and why...

It's so he can see his friends again.

- 2 hours later -

We bought a house down here, knowing he would be closer to his friends. They don't know that Tord is alive and we don't have access to them since Tord wouldn't let us go on his phone, so we're gonna try a way to get him to see them again.

"Tord, since we're here, how about you explore the town a bit? We can set up your room for you," I suggest.

"Uhh sure, I have nothing better to do anyways," Tord says.

"Here have some money to buy some food if you get hungry out there, ok," Pau says, taking some money out of his pocket and handing it to Tord.

Tord gives the money back to Pau and says,

"Thanks, but I doubt I'd be."

"Tord, you didn't have anything for breakfast, please at least take the money and buy a small snack or something," I insisted.

Tord sighs and takes the money back from Pau.

"Fine..."

I ruffle his hair and gave him a warm smile.

"Thank you. Now go, we don't want you moping around the house any more," I say.

"Yeah, yeah. Bye Mom, Bye Dad," Tord says, waving his hand as he makes his way out the door.

The door shuts and me and Pau look at eachother nervously.

"Pat, are sure this plan is going to work?"

"It has to. This is the only option we have left," I said, nervously. "I just hope that they accept him as a friend again, once they see him."

Tord POV

As I was walking down the streets, I couldn't help but feel that it looked oddly familiar.

Have I been here before?

I was so lost in my thoughts, I didn't realize someone was in front of me. I bumped into them and fell to the ground.

"Ugh, watch where you're going," ??? grumbled.

"S-sorry..."

That voice sounded so familiar. Why?

That's when I heard another familiar voice, this time calling my name.

"Tord!? Is that you?"

"Huh, how do you know who I...... am?"

I couldn't even believe that it was really them.

A/N:

Oh! I hope It's his old friends UwU

My Anxiety: Who else is it goin to be? -_-

Idk. He could have other friends you know UwU

Don't you remember what Pat said? He brought Tord here to see his old friends again. What other friends is he going to have? >:(

*gasps* How could you even say that!? You so rude. Ò^Ó
He could have other friends, we just don't know them. Ù^Ú

Uh huh, ok then. Keep thinking that...