I watched the tranquil sea with unfocused and unblinking eyes. When I finally exhaled a deep shaky breath into the silence after what felt like an eternity, the realization of what I had just done sank in.

I just...I killed someone.

I killed someone.

Dropping to my knees, I clamped my hands over the edge of the boat before retching into the sea and coughing violently. Clinging onto the boat, I lowered my head to the wooden deck, trying to steady my breathing with deep, ragged breaths. I broke out into heavy sobs, heaving wildly, feeling as if I was losing my mind.

I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry!

I clutched my head as my eyes frantically scanned the sea. For survival- I did it for survival. It happened on a whim, and I couldn't help myself... but I did it for our safety; our survival!

I repeated these words like a mantra before I eventually calmed down. I washed and rinsed my mouth hurriedly and collapsed next to Tavin's lifeless-looking body, feeling the coldness of his form. "T-Tavin," I whispered, tears threatening to come into my eyes once more but he didn't budge.

Oh my God, what happened to us?

He is alive, he is here, you are not alone, Candace. Tavin is here and he is alive.

I looked around, trying to find something to help him from getting cold. My eyes then zoned in on something floating on the water. Distracted, I leaned over and grabbed the wet paper from the water. My eyes widened as I recognized it to be a map of the Atlantic Ocean. However, the letters and shapes were all smudged and unreadable as water dripped onto my lap. Afraid that it would tear, I immediately laid it on the hull hoping that the sun would dry it out quickly. The map was disoriented, but I hoped I could make out even the slightest of directions that could lead me to the nearest land.

A small whimper drew my attention to Tavin, who was curled up on the doused deck, shivering uncontrollably like a soaked feline. Mentally chastising myself for forgetting to attend to him earlier, I tried to shake him awake. But he remained dead to the world, his irregular groans and shivers the only indication of his life.

His face was badly bruised, and his neck appeared to be suspiciously reddened, which caused me to fear the worst. He must have endured a lot while fighting against both George and Greg, who were significantly larger. George...No, I'll ask what happened after Tavin wakes up. But now, I need to get him patched up. The emergency first aid box we had in the boat didn't have much to offer, but made do with what was available; a pot of cream without a label on and some bandages that I used to wrap Tavin up. Hopefully, the cream wasn't a bluff.

As he was drenched from head to toe, his chesticles were on display through the white fabric of his shirt and his ash-blond hair was flattened against his glistening forehead. Wow, he really was handsome...I shook my head with a shudder to get rid of the unwanted thoughts to focus on the important task at hand. I had no choice but to take his clothes off him. I hovered my hand over the buttons on his shirt with my lip bitten reluctantly.

"I'm s-sorry, excuse me," I uttered to his unresponsive form and speedily unbuttoned his shirt, trying to keep my eyes from roaming his torso and formed, lean body.

Oh, God.

Don't look at that impressive body.

I squeezed the water out of his white shirt and spread it out on the boat next to the map, facing it to the intense sun to dry. After taking a deep breath, I quickly averted my gaze to his lower body before squeezing them shut with a tired groan.

I cannot...Ugh...I can't believe I'm going to do this.

It's okay, Candance, he saved your life, so this is the least you could do so he wouldn't catch a cold.

Sucking in my lips and pointedly looking at the gentle outlines of the waves, my fingers shakily but hurriedly proceeded to unzip his pants. With my eyes elsewhere, I almost tripped onto the top of his body in an attempt to pull his pants down his long legs. I hadn't realized that I was even holding my breath until I had wrung his pants and placed them next to his shirt to let it dry. Then with quick hands, I covered his whole body with our blankets. Even the emergency equipment from George's and Greg's boat had three blankets which I wrapped around Tavin.

Just remembering their names had me shuddering in disgust and I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to forget the repulsive and revolting feeling of Greg's hands and touch on my body. I needed to wash up; I want to get rid of their touch from my body.

Attending to Tavin and the other chores is proving to be a good distraction.

Now that Tavin was knocked out cold, maybe I could take this chance to have a small dip in the ocean at least. He seemed to be more content now, snuggled into the dark blue blankets like he was in the comfort of his bed.

Looking over at the overturned boat that was sunken partially in the sea, my eyes nervously scanned the sea, afraid that Greg or George would suddenly appear from the waves.

I need to get the boat away from here.

I quickly got to work. I grabbed the oars and positioned them on either side of the boat and plunged the blades into the water. Despite feeling tremendously sore and inexperienced, I attempted to mimic the typical rowing motion to push the oar blades through the water. And finally, with great effort, I managed to push the boat away from the scene, passing the overturned boat in the process. I took deep, audible breaths, feeling sweat seeping out of every pore in my body. The scorching sun glared down at me, and it took several minutes before the stranded boat was no longer visible to me.

We were away from them. They...they were never going to come back.

Bringing the boat to a halt, I collapsed onto it with a deadbeat groan. Never before had I worked or exhausted myself to this extent. Tavin appeared to have stopped shivering from the cold, but his clothes and the map were still soaked. I cautiously stepped over Tavin, and after guardedly watching him for any movements, with a deep breath, I removed my dress. Damn, how wrong would this situation look to an outsider?

It's okay, Candance, let's pray to all Gods and Lords that Tavin wouldn't wake until you've done washing up.

Looking back again at Tavin who was motionless, I slowly dipped my body into the sea, holding the edge of the boat with a death grip.

Oh, what euphoria to finally wash off your body after more than a week...

Regardless of the blazing sun overhead, the cool water felt refreshing against my skin as I washed off the lingering filth and the repugnant touch of Greg. After days of feeling sticky, sweaty, and exhausted, this bath was a welcome relief. I wished I had some soap, but I had to make do with what was available.

I was alive and asking for anything else was just being too greedy.

Feeling a little adventurous, I took a deep breath and ducked my head beneath the ocean's surface. The world below was cloaked in darkness, except for the occasional glimmer of sunlight filtering in through the waves in the distance. I had hoped to catch a glimpse of some colorful coral or fish, but it was only an endless abyss of darkness. Disappointed, I resurfaced and quickly scrubbed my scalp and washed away the greasiness from my hair.

Wow, why do I feel like I conquered the world after that much-needed 'bath'?

I climbed back into the boat, mindful to not wobble the boat too much as I stared cautiously at Tavin. I borrowed one of the dark blue blankets that covered Tavin with an apology. I used the bloodied knife to cut the edge and tear a piece off in one go and wiped my body and dried myself off with it as best I could. I held up my pale dress in front of me and examined it. It was worn out, looking shabby and had a little dirt on its frills. Ugh, what a sad life. It made me wonder how the cartoon characters from my childhood days always wore the same permanent costume every episode.

Begrudgingly, I put back the dress on, wincing when the familiar cloth grazed my damp skin. But I felt fresher and cleaner than before since and I was content enough with it. I will have to suck it up until we reach land. I sure was fortunate that I wasn't on my period.

Looking around the boat, I made sure there was nothing else to do and sat back down on the deck. I was so exhausted. My fatigue was so immense, not even my hunger could beat it. What an eventful day.

I wish I had more work to do to distract myself from thinking of the events that led us both to this situation.

Two strange men, almost losing Tavin, trying to save our lives...by taking the life of someone for the first time...

I shuddered at the memory and brought my knees up to my chest and hugged myself. I hoped I could move on from the fact that I had killed someone for survival. It was something I never imagined myself doing. I was responsible for someone's death. I shakily breathed out and closed my eyes. I had run out of tears. My eyes were burning already. Will we have to deal with people like that some more? How can we trust the next person we meet? What if they appeared to be the same?

I was too tired to think any further. I was too exhausted; I didn't want to wallow in the pitiful and sinful deeds I just did.

We have more supplies now, though I have yet to study them. I had plunged everything from their boat to ours without hesitation or a second glance. Once Tavin awakens, we will go through them and plan our next move. In the meantime, I better get some rest and conserve my energy for whatever challenges that lie for us ahead. Before I realized it, my eyes had closed, my body easing even against the hard surface of the wooden boat that we have accustomed to for the past week.

° ° °

I was jolted awake with a start when somebody vigorously shook my body. Huh? What- is it evening or morning? What time was it? What was the last thing I did? Damnit, I don't remember-

"CANDACE!"

My eyes darted open and I was met a pair of large, gray eyes staring at me with alarm, while my own amber eyes widened in shock. His body was only half-covered by the blankets as he loomed over me. In the background, the evening sky was growing dimmer, and he breathed heavily with a panicked and frantic expression on his face.

"T-Tavin?"

My breath left my body as Tavin pulled me towards him, his arms tightly enveloping my body under his chin, while I lay there rigidly, stunned by the suddenness of it all.