"Time doesn't heal anything. It just teaches us how to live with the pain."

-Unknown

***

A small girl stood in front of me, her pale hand outstretched. I reluctantly took my schedule, And the girl smiled.

She was extremely short, like, so short she only reached my shoulders, and her wispy brown hair fluttered around her neck. Her eyes were a strange topaz, yellow shade, and her skin was so pale she looked like a porcelain doll.

"My name is Alice Cullen." She extended her hand, which I shook, shocked at how cold it was.

"I'm Courtney Swan."

***

Alice pulled me to a stop next to a girl... I don't even know if that description fits her. She looks more like a goddess to me.

She analyzed me through the same yellow eyes that Alice has, and had long, wavy blonde hair that fell to her mid-back. She was also ghostly pale, but in a good way. She looked like the kind of girl who could make models cry.

"Rose! This is Courtney Swan!" Alice exclaimed, putting emphasis on my name. Rosalie's lips curled up in a delicate smirk. "Oh, hi Courtney."

"Hi Rosalie."

***

A blonde head turned in our direction, and I felt the air get sucked out of my lungs.

I thought Rosalie was attractive... you should see this guy.

He had short, messy blonde hair, and pale skin like his sister. He had a defined jawline that seemed to get sharper every step closer to him I took.

"That's Jasper."

***

One was a burly brunette, with yellow eyes and dark brown hair. He looked really scary to be honest, but when he smiled at me, his unusual eyes glittered with mischief. The other looked sort of like an angle that fell from heaven. He didn't have the same effect on me that Jasper did, but his pale skin still seemed to shine in the light. He had caramel colored hair, and yellow eyes as well. It must be pure chance that they all have such unusual eyes.

Alice pulled me down in the spot next to The big guy, I am assuming he is Emmett, and her. Jasper sat across the table next to Edward, who nodded at him with a look of pity.

"Hi." I waved timidly, I felt so small sitting here with all of these beautiful humans.

"Hey Court!" Emmett exclaimed, grinning ear to ear. "I have heard so much about you!"

***

It has been four months.

But it is still fresh.

Bella doesn't talk to me anymore... actually, she doesn't really talk to anyone anymore. I was like that, For about a week. Then, I could slowly feel the pit of sadness in my stomach transition into anger. I was mad. I don't know if I have ever been so mad before in my life. How could they? How could they just let me get attached to them, and then leave? Just like that? Jasper didn't even say goodbye. Will my last memory of him be standing out on that balcony?

"We're going to a movie with Jessica tonight."

I turned to glare at Bella, who stood at the entrance of my bedroom. "Oh, so now you talk to me?"

She didn't respond, just turned and disappeared down the hall. I stuck up my middle finger at the door. I rolled my eyes, slumping down on my pillow. Bella has nightmares that wake her up, screaming bloody murder. I just have dreams. But I think those are worse then hers. Because, in mine, everything is normal. And when I wake up, I have to cope with the fact that it is not.

Plus, Jessica?

Sadie has been more busy with her new baby sister that I haven't even met yet. She was doing the best out of all of us, and without her, I might kill someone.

"Court?" Charlie appeared in my doorway, and I immediately plastered a smile on my face. He is so busy worrying about Bella, I have tried to act as normal as possible as to not stress him out. He doesn't need to know about my unnatural anger.

"Bella said you guys are going to see a movie with Jessica tonight?"

"Oh yeah, I think it'll be good to go out-" A lump grew in my throat, and I struggled to swallow it. That happens randomly, I just sometimes feel like I need to cry. I don't. Never. I refuse to cry, because if they don't care about me, then I won't care about them.

"Um, yeah."

"Good." Charlie gave me a tentative glance, and then ducked out of my room. I grabbed onto my bear, trying to compose myself with deep breaths. It hurts. It hurts that they didn't love me like I loved them.

It hurts how stupid I was.

***

"Okay that movie was stupid." I noted as we exited the theater. We saw this weird Zombie action-film, and it was unrealistic as well as stupid. I mean, I binged all the seasons of The Walking Dead, and now I miss Daryl.

"I know right?" Jessica began ranting about the idiocy of the movie. I only half-listened, nodding along occasionally. The dark streets were throwing all of my senses into overdrive, and I didn't know where to look.

"Like, some girls like to shop!" She exclaimed, throwing her arms in the air and giving me an incredulous look. "Some don't!"

"Look, I think you're annoying, and weird, and potentially a danger to us all, but you're still my friend. Sort of, kind of... maybe." She shook her head as I gave her a mildly amused look. Jessica is one of the few people I don't want to kill whenever they open their mouth. Maybe it's because she isn't afraid to say what she thinks. "So I'm glad you're not all-" She nudged her head in Bella's direction, and I nodded in understanding. She was staring at the ground, a frown set on her face. "Thanks, Jess."

"This doesn't mean I like you." She defended, holding up a finger. "But you noticed how mushy-gushy Eric and Angela are? Like, she needs to date Ben!"

"I know!" I groaned, throwing my head back. "You're lucky you don't have gym with them! It's like, Angela we know you have a boyfriend and all, but date Ben!"

"We need to stage an intervention!"

"I one-hundred percent agree."

It hurt to talk about love-lives. Thankfully, Jessica and the rest of my new friend group don't ever bring up the C- them.

"Yeah and- hey! Where are you going?"

I turned my head, my now longer hair swishing around my shoulders as I did so. Bella looked to be some kind of trance as she was walking down to a dark alley. I could make out a group of men hollering as she got closer. My newfound anger spiked. "One sec." I handed Jessica my bag, stalking over to my twin as she was within arm distance.

"Hey! Another!" A man yelled, and I flashed a sickly sweet smile, flipping up my middle finger. "Sorry, assholes, we got an important meeting we can't miss."

I turned, dragging Bella back up the street to a pissed off looking Jessica.

"What the hell were you thinking?" I demanded, and Bella's eyes widened. "That was such a rush."

"Oh so you're an adrenaline junky now?" Jessica demanded, handing me back my bag. "Like jeez, just prance up to some random losers on the street!"

"Courtney!" She pulled me aside so Jessica couldn't hear. "I saw him."

"Who?" My eyebrows furrowed.

"Him! Ed- Edward!"

My eyes narrowed and my lips drew into a tight line. "No you didn't. You're imagining things."

"No! I. Saw. Him!"

"He's gone, Bella!" I snapped, "They're all gone! You can't try to convince yourself otherwise, because then you will only hurt yourself mor when you pull your head out of the clouds! I hope you can someway convince yourself of that!"

And then I turned to stalk back to Jessica.   

A/N: We got some Jacob in the next chapter! Super excited to write it. 

 (I love Jacob's character, but S.M ruined it by making him into a love interest!)