-Lucien-

She held it together well walking away. Better than I anticipated.

She didn't scream, didn't audibly cry, and most surprisingly, didn't look back.

The first two were telling. Her silence wasn't easily attainable I'd learned, but this certainly would have put most people in that state.

I knew this was going to be a shit show. Hell, that's why I offered it. I wanted a show, which I got, though it ended up going a little bit differently than I'd anticipated.

I'd really underestimated the level of fuckery this man had been feeding her. That and the level of basic human respect

The bar was already scarily low and yet he made them continue to fall.

She loved him. For some reason she loved him and here's where it got her.

I watched her quick steps back to the car, keeping my typical slower gait and seeing her arms cross and her head tuck down.

The bits and pieces of what I knew were enough to cut her a bit of slack knowing she hadn't been dealt the best cards in life. We were similar there.

That may have been why things became difficult to watch once I noticed her starting to fall apart.

She figured it out. She learned the lesson I'd always guessed was there.

It was the least I could do to pull her out and save her more of the embarrassment from letting that continue.

Any more of that and I was going to start raising an issue.

I just couldn't believe that people like him existed amongst humans.

I knew enough about people reigning unwarranted superiority over the powerless

Kira didn't waste a second hopping back into the car, and I followed suit at my own pace and after instructing my driver to just take us back home.

She sat in the far corner, turned, and faced out the window with her hand pressed firmly against her mouth.

There was an attempt to hide her tears behind that long, black hair, but my other senses told me enough of what I needed to know.

I took a seat on the opposite side, and decided to stay quiet too. There wasn't anything to rub in her face that she wasn't now already aware of, and I didn't entertain the idea of pointing out the obvious.

Or fighting with someone who didn't have any left.

I liked relatively fair ground, or at least prodding someone who had a fighting spirit.

Typically she would bite back, but this silence told a story that I was decent enough to let be.

I knew enough what it felt like to not have anything left and to want nothing more than just to be left alone, so for now, that's what I'll do.

_ __ ___ __ _

-Kira-

This bed was all I had left to hope for comfort, the weight of this blanket being the only thing left holding me together.

'Holding me together' through the box of tissues and buckets of tears I've gone through for the past day.

I just didn't get it. I didn't understand how things just kept getting worse.

I didn't get how I didn't see the signs, how I didn't notice, how he was able to just get on with me that easily.

He was all I had left and now... now I had nothing from my past to hold on to. I had absolutely nothing left to show me as different from the rest of the pets.

This wasn't the life I wanted. I don't think anybody wants a shift so grand that it changes the very essence of what your life is... Losing everything you had before in so many terrible, tragic ways.

My father's dead, my mother left a long time ago, and the last person I had to depend on hasn't wanted anything to do with me for a while.

He threw me away just like that.

Now I was left with just... this. An impossible entrapment on a secure floor of royal vampires.

It was getting so bad that I caught myself appreciating some of the little things I wouldn't let myself dwell too long on before all of this.

I didn't want to slip into that 'it could be worse' mindset because that was no way to like, yet here I was.

I had a bed, a room, clothes, constant access to fantastic food, people to talk to, and things to do on this restained floor. A doctor looking into the condition that's plagued me since I was born.

For now, I could live with that and so my mind moved on.

It came to the point where I realized that maybe I deserved it... I mean hell I slept with a vampire not even twelve hours before seeing him again.

I can't get mad at him for moving on when I...

Another wave of tears ran down my cheek, and I buried my face into my pillow to dull the sound.

A knock on my door came soon after, one that had my lifting my head and wiping my eyes.

"What," the word didn't come out how I wanted it to. Broken and exhausted with a hoarseness that gave away what I'd been doing.

Lucien opened my door a second later with a metal domed plate in his hand.

Even still he lacked any sort of indication of a response I was expecting from him in terms of how things went this morning.

The same blank, careless expression.

"Dinner," Was all he said, walking the plate over to the little fridge and setting it on top.

My empty stomach twisted at the thought. The very idea of eating anything right now made me feel nauseous.

I felt empty and hurt and betrayed... I couldn't imagine stomaching anything right now.

"I don't want any," I croaked out, subtly wiping my eyes with the back of my hand again so he wouldn't see tears.

"I don't care," His tone showed that much, putting his hands into the pockets of his typical sweats and he took a step back, still facing me, "You're not gonna end up starving yourself because of someone like that."

I blinked, my eyes growing round.

I wasn't expecting him to say something like that... anything like that.

"It's not," I staggered a moment, taking a second to try to fix the mess that was my hair right now, "It's not just that, it's uhm..."

I stopped myself from carrying on.

Why would he want to hear it? We weren't friends. We weren't anything.

"You're mourning," He spoke up, effectively surprising me again, "Which is understandable, but don't mourn the wrong thing. Mourn what happened to you, how you were treated, the words said to you, but don't mourn him. He doesn't deserve it."

I sat a little straighter to give him my full attention.

I think he understood a little too well. As a vampire, I'm sure he's seen a lot in his days, so I let myself soak in his words completely for once.

He too shifted, crossing his arms and leaning his shoulder against the wall.

"Don't give his memory your tears. Give him your anger."

"Do I even have a right to be mad?" I asked before I could stop it, ignoring the crack in my voice, "I mean hell, I was in bed with you before all of that. I'm no better."

His unreadable stare stayed steady in the moments he took to think.

"I was having a day last night and you were frustrated in your own right. We were both handling our own shit and it looks like we both have similar ways of finding an outlet for it. I don't know if that morally compares to ditching a five-year relationship and moving on completely with someone new within the time that you were gone. No matter what, it absolutely doesn't make up for what he said to you today."

My lower lip trembled at the memory, at all of the memories that I once went to for comfort but now only found a void.

Instead, I grasped to the small solace what he said gave me, and knew I'd be using it for a bit to think over things a bit more.

"Anyway," He pushed off of the wall and turned, "Eat your food. Mourn the right thing. I'm going to bed."

There was a lurch within me. The sporadic nature of words left unsaid earlier.

He'd been... helpful today. More than I thought I deserved.

"Hey Lucien," His name escaped me, and my lips pressed together tight as soon as I heard it with my own voice.

He stopped, the gold peeking over his shoulder to look at me.

My next words struggled to form given that it wasn't something I'd ever imagined saying to this man.

So it might as well be at my lowest, then I've got nothing else to lose.

"Thank you... For stepping in when you did."

Thinking back on it, I don't know what I would have done.

Any other end to that situation was by something far more embarrassing happening and I couldn't have handled that well.

He gave me an out. THe most elegant one I could have hoped for in that disastrous situation.

There was a stillness, a silence that had me nearly holding my breath the longer he looked at me in thought.

Yeah I'd be surprised if I heard a 'thank you' from me too after all I've said to him.

Finally, he sighed out a simple, "Yeah," and continued his way out of the room, shutting the door behind him.