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Touch

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Chapter 17: Touch (Grace's POV)

I scoffed, looking at him in disbelief. Is he... flirting? "I get engaged in a week." 

"Two weeks," he corrected. "You'll postpone it again. I need more time to figure out what's going on with your family and the James family," he mumbled. "And anyway, what does that have anything to do with what we do? It's not like you love or even actually like Lucas. Plus, what if before your wedding, I'm able to prove that both your families are involved. Will you still... marry him?" He looked at me while poking at his food. 

"I don't know," I sighed. "If I find out that not just my family, but even his... even him... I think I'll run." "Where to?" I shrugged, "Don't know. Maybe to my Nana." 

"Nana?" 

I chuckled softly, "Grandma. To Crista." 

"Crista? Is that where your mom was from?" 

"Hmm," I nodded. "So... maybe I'd go there. At least for a while. Maybe I'd just settle there. At least for a few years." 

"And what happens after a few years?" 

"I'm not sure, but I'm hoping I could love and marry someone I actually want to." We both sat in silence for a while and I started thinking. I started soaking in my reality. My own family might be trying to kill me, and even the family I'm supposed to call my own after marrying Lucas. How could I after knowing what I know? "Ronan," I said softly. 

"Hmm?" 

I looked at him. "Do you think they'd still want me dead if I step down as princess?" 

"What?" 

"What if I step down and leave the palace? Give up all my rights and duties as the princess of Astella. Do you think they'd let me live?" 

He stared at me silently and the heat of his gaze felt too strong for me to hold it. I swallowed and blinked, looking away and at the mostly empty bowl. "I don't think you should give up your birthrights at any cost, Princess." 

"And I don't think being a princess is worth my life." 

"Do you really think you could lead a normal life?" 

"I think I need to try it to find out." 

He chuckled dryly, "You were born as a princess so you'd never have to find out." 

I turned to look at him. 

"You can't give up so quickly." 

"It's a little hard to keep trying when it feels like it's you against everybody else." 

"It's not though," he paused. "You have me." 

"Earlier today, you said even you could kill me if my parents paid you enough. Remember?" I lifted a brow. 

"And then I told you they didn't pay me enough. Remember?" he mocked. "You shouldn't give up your privileges, Princess. Unless you don't want them to begin with." 

"It's not about what I want, but... does being a princess really serve me? It's not like I'll get anything. Atlas is first to the throne, he would get everything. His children would be put before mine, his life would be put before mine, his—" 

"But don't you think if he has so much on his shoulders, someone should be there for him?" 

I blinked in surprise, staring at him. I've... never thought of it like that. 

"If you feel like you have nobody but Atlas, don't you think he feels the same? Like he only has you? If you leave, he'll have nobody at all. I hope you realize that." 

"Should I sacrifice myself for him then?" 

"No. Has he ever sacrificed himself for you?" 

"No... but he has saved me." 

"Then consider it repayment. Save him once." 

I frowned, leaning against the headboard. "Can't I save him without putting myself in danger? Can't I save him without being a princess?" 

"Sure you can. You just need to figure out how." 

I narrowed my eyes. "Your wise words deem useful. But I don't know if I'll remember them." 

"Don't worry, I'll remind you whenever you need to hear them." He cleared up the food containers and then threw them in the trash before grabbing the spare clothes and tossing me mine. "You can go change in the bathroom, I'll change here." 

I nodded, grabbing the clothes in a bundle and going to the bathroom. I locked the door, dropped the clothes on the counter, and took my dress off after tying my hair back. I stepped out of the dress and hung it on the door before grabbing the t-shirt. I pulled it over my head and reached for the pants only to realize... there were no freaking pants. My mouth fell open while I let my hair back down, wondering if I accidentally left them on the bed. I slowly opened the door as silently as I could and stuck my head out, looking at the bed, only to find it empty. My eyes drifted over to Ronan who was already wearing the sweatpants he bought but he was still in his button-up from earlier. 

Look away, Grace, look away. Shut the door and look away. 

But I didn't. I leaned against the doorframe, watching him. He shrugged it off after unbuttoning the sleeves and all the buttons, tossing it on the chair. He spun around to grab the t-shirt and my eyes widened as I quickly stepped back into the bathroom, slamming the door shut. I leaned against it, pulling my lips into a thin line while squeezing my eyes shut tightly. "What the hell?" I whispered to myself. I hit my head against the door softly, getting startled when he knocked on the door. 

"Are you okay?" 

"Uh, yeah, I'm fine! Just um..." I turned around and opened the door, only enough to stick my head out. "Don't you think you're forgetting something?" 

"Am I?" He blinked in confusion. "What?" 

How the hell do I tell him he forgot to buy me a pair of pants? "Mr. Stone." 

"Yes?" 

"List everything you bought a while ago." 

He watched me, dumbfounded, but did as I asked. "Two bowls of noodles, two t-shirts, and two pants." 

"No, try again. Here's a hint, it's the clothes." I smiled sarcastically, suppressing my anger. 

"Two t-shirts..." Realization took over his face. "No..." 

"Yes," I gritted. "One pair of pants and a pair of socks." I grabbed the socks, throwing them at his face. "What am I going to do with socks?!" 

He caught them, leaning against the wall across from me. He doesn't even know what to say. "Warm your feet?"

"What are you waiting for? Go buy them!" 

"Um... I'm afraid I can't do that." 

"Why the hell not?" 

"The man was closing up when I went there. I just grabbed the first set of clothes I saw and left the money on the table. I'm sure he's gone by now." 

I stared at him in disbelief. "Should I just sleep on the bathroom floor?" 

"No, I'm—" He touched his cupid's bow, biting back a smile. "I'm thinking, hold on." 

I shut the door and leaned against it, crying out in frustration. He knocked again a minute later and I turned around, sticking my head out. "What?" 

"Come outside." 

"Are you insane?" 

"I won't look." 

"Ronan—" 

He clicked his tongue in frustration and pushed the door open, his eyes on my face the entire time. "I said I won't look." I blinked in surprise, backing up against the counter while he walked forward, trapping me in spot. He had his button-up from earlier in his hand. "You can wear this to sleep, it'll probably be longer than what you're wearing now, or..." He cleared his throat, holding it out for me to take. "Tie it around your waist." I stared at him, frozen. His eyes scanned my face and I noticed them lingering on my lips before they met mine again. "You're not responding." 

Because I don't know what the hell to say. 

"So... I'm just going to do it for you." My eyes widened but I still didn't say a word. "Okay," he mumbled, grabbing the sleeves of his shirt and then grabbing my waist, pulling me away from the counter. I held my breath while he reached around me and tied the sleeves around my waist so the length of his shirt covered me, reaching my knees. He tightened it and I let out a small gasp. "I won't look. Throughout the night, don't worry. In fact..." He reached behind me and turned the lights off, drawing the room into absolute darkness. "There. Now I can't see even if I wanted to." He reached for my hand, his fingers grazing my thigh, setting me on fire. 

It's his touch I should be worried about, not his gaze. I felt it every single time he touched me. My skin comes alight with fire and heat and it feels like if I don't get away from him fast enough, my body won't be able to handle it and my heart will go into overdrive. It's his touch I should avoid. 

I let him guide me out until the faint moonlight seeping in from the curtains was enough to let me see the bed. We both climbed into our own sides quietly, not even glancing at each other. I quickly slipped my legs under the covers, jumping when they brushed against his. 

I began getting out of bed and running back to the bathroom where I would die of embarrassment but he grabbed my wrist and pulled me in. "Just breathe and pretend nothing happened." 

"Really?" I rolled onto my side to face him. "Is it that easy? You know, I don't think I've ever been so embarrassed in my whole life and it isn't even because of me," I scolded, pulling my arm away from him. 

He let out a soft chuckle and I felt my heart skip a beat. First, I got him smiling, now I earned his laughs too? 

"What?" I mumbled. 

"You're the beloved princess of Astella. You don't have anything to be embarrassed about. It's my fault. I'll go grab something tomorrow morning if possible. Until then, let's just stay on our sides of the bed, hmm?" 

"What if one of us falls off?" I whispered in the dark. 

"Then uh..." His arm snaked around my waist hesitantly. "I'll catch you like this." He retracted it. "But you're not falling now. Don't worry. You'll sleep just fine. That is if you actually go to sleep, Princess. Goodnight." 

"Night," I mumbled, turning around so my back faced him. All I have to do is not fall off and make sure no parts of his body are touching mine. That's it. It can't be that hard, come on.

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Chapter 17

let's bring in some lust, shall we?

next chapter: forbidden