⚠️TRIGGER WARNING⚠️- mature themes

Eren whipped out a condom from his back pocket. I laughed— he had been waiting for this. Sex was one of the few things Eren thought about, and he hadn't seen me in weeks— of course he was prepared.

"Shut the fuck up before I break you," Eren chided, covering his slight embarrassment. "I've just been missing you," he mumbled.

"That's sweet. Now take off the rest of your clothes," I ordered.

"Yes, ma'am," Eren obeyed, pulling off his sweatpants. I watched the key necklace I had given to him dangle on his muscular chest, glinting in the light from the hallway. He slipped on the condom and leaned on top of me, trapping me between his arms and breathing heavily.

"First, a goodnight kiss," he started, coming up to my lips slowly. Just as I was about to kiss him, Eren dug his teeth into the side of my neck, digging his fingers into the back of my waist.

I arched my back in pain, flinching. "You asshole! I thought you wanted a kiss!"

Eren's green eyes lifted to meet mine and he gave me a sly smirk. "I just want to keep you in line, baby."

I felt the tip of his cock prod the entrance to my cunt. Eren pecked my cheek reassuringly.

"Are you ready for it?" he whispered. I nodded, wrapping my arms and legs around Eren's muscular frame. He thrusted into me, "Oh fuck—"

My eyes rolled back— despite the many times I had been with Eren, that first thrust was one I could never prepare for. His cock was always bigger than I remembered.

"You're so tight," Eren breathed, staying still for a moment. I felt his hand squish my cheeks together roughly and lift my head up. His fiery stare burned into me: "Didn't I tell you to look at me when I fuck you?" Eren shoved his thumb in my mouth. "If it hurts... suck it up," he said harshly.

With no hesitation, Eren began pounding into me roughly, keeping his green eyes locked onto mine the entire time. He grinned triumphantly, enjoying all of the different lustful expressions I was making.

I watched in awe as he pounded into me, face contorted as his key necklace dangled over me. I ran my fingers across Eren's raw, hot skin, feeling his biceps and core tense and relax with each thrust. A sheen of sweat covered his forehead, small bits of his dark hair sticking to it.

He was relentless. It was nonstop. It felt like he had been fucking me roughly for hours. There were hickeys and scratch marks all over my skin— but the worst pain was his cock. I had expected his rhythm to slow as time went on, but it had only increased.

"It— it hurts—!" I choked out, feeling tears pooling in my eyes.

Eren looked down on me and pressed his lips against mine deeply, still continuing to pound into me. The bed rocked us back and forth, but he didn't stop. As we made out, Eren wiped a tear from my face with his thumb.

"Don't be sad, baby," he mumbled into the crook of my neck, "I love you so much."

My breath hitched— Eren had moved his fingers back down to the entrance of my cunt as he continued to thrust into me roughly. I felt myself tighten around his cock.

"Fuck, babe, that's good," he heaved, breaking eye-contact for a moment to enjoy the feeling. Before I could react, Eren flipped me on top of him. I straddled his cock, feeling it press against my insides. Eren's green eyes stared wildly at me as he wiped the sweat from his brow, pushing his loose hair behind his ears. His key necklace rested on his glistening, muscular chest. I leaned forward to touch it, pushing myself onto Eren's cock, earning a moan from him.

"Holy shit," he gasped, running his fingers along my bare back. "You're so fucking hot," Eren admired.

I pressed my palms onto his chest, feeling the cold key under one hand, and began moving my waist up and down, grinding on him.

His breath hitched and his face flushed— it seemed that Eren was having a harder time staring at me now. He was too focused on the feeling. I felt his cock tense inside me as I continued riding him, enjoying every moan and grunt of pleasure that escaped his lips unwillingly. I had never seen him so vulnerable.

"Don't stop—" he heaved, "I love watching you ride me like this... Fuck, (Y/N)... You're such a good girl to me... I love you—"

I felt another tear leak down from my cheek. While I loved riding him, it hurt like hell. Eren lifted his head up and his expression softened. He gripped me by the waist, letting my muscles grow limp, and pounded into me from below. I fell into his rhythm, thighs tired from moving so much. Eren's stamina was sometimes too much for me to take.

"Fuck yes, baby, right there," he groaned as I arched my back, giving him a better opening inside me. Eren pounded into me with more ferocity, spewing profanities and mumbled strings of words: "Don't fucking move you're so perfect just like that please don't stop I love you I love you I love you—"

My cunt ached and I could feel myself about to cum. With one final thrust, Eren sent me over the edge and my body quivered around his cock. The pressure that had been building inside me from weeks without seeing him was released and I came again.

"Eren—" I whimpered.

"Fuck, you feel amazing," he moaned. Shortly after, Eren pulled out and flipped me onto my back, slipping off his condom and releasing onto my chest.

We remained there for a moment, the two of us breathing heavily. Eren towered over me in the darkness, key dangling over my eyes, hypnotizing me as his chest moved up and down.

Eren stared at me longingly with his beautiful green eyes. He leaned down for a kiss, looping his arm under my head and pulling me up to him. His lips pressed against mine deeply and we stayed there— trapped in a single kiss— for a minute. Then, he released me and walked to the bathroom to grab a towel for me.

———

After cleaning up, the two of us lay in bed, Eren having scooped me in his arms. I felt his soft breath hit the nape of my neck as he held me limply. His thumb rubbed circles around my hand consolingly, reminding me of the first time he had ever held me like this. Instinctively, my eyes darted down to the pallid scars on his wrists, scars that had finally begun to fade away. There was thick white mark on his right arm, something that would probably never disappear. I remember vividly when Eren had cut himself on the beach and begged for me to let him die.

But, as I felt Eren's rich heartbeat against my back, I was reminded that things were different now. I trailed my index finger over the deep gash that had sent both me and Eren spiraling what felt like ages ago, then kissed it lightly. What would I do without him?

I felt a tear slide down my cheek. Of course, I have to get emotional right now. It didn't really matter— Eren was asleep after all— but it was hard for me to keep my feelings about him contained.

Something patted my cheek. "Are you crying?" Eren asked concernedly, instinctively pulling me closer. "What's wrong? Are you okay?"

They weren't tears of pain, though.

"Eren, I have to ask you a question," I started.

"Okay."

"Why are you alive?" I asked bluntly.

"Eh? Why am I alive?" he paused, petting my head as he thought, "I'm alive for... for..."

Please don't say "for you". I remembered vaguely my conversation one car ride with Eren. He had said that part of the reason he was living was for me. When I pushed him on the subject, he had brushed it aside, claiming that it wasn't entirely true. While I mostly believed him, there was a tiny part of me that still worried that he was relying on me for too much. And, even if I planned to be with Eren forever, I couldn't be his everything.

Even if that's what all of my insecurities most desired— to be wanted and needed by Eren for eternity— that wasn't how either of us should have been living our lives.

Eren's voice reached my ear assuredly:

"I'm alive for me."

I smiled, closing my eyes and feeling his warmth around me. Thank you, Eren. It was the answer I had wanted.

But then, he gave me what I had come looking for:

"But my love is reserved all for you." 

The End

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