I knew the sense of unfairness and missed opportunities would always remain, but I woke the next morning with a much less heavy heart. It had admittedly felt good to get everything off my chest. Mind clear, I could work on returning my focus to the task.

     The snow caused me less distress and I was able to commence my day the same way I had the past weeks. I spent the morning with the boys, happy for the return of our regular schedule. Though now they acknowledged or spoke briefly to one another in the hall, neither group went out of their way to engage with the other. I didn't mind the space, I kind of appreciated it. As nice as the previous day's lunch had been, both groups acted differently in the absence of the others. I thought the very different atmospheres refreshing. I enjoyed the girls' easy going and sophisticated conversations and the boy's carefree, boisterous nonsense.

     My day had been going well. Troubling thoughts pushed away, I even allowed myself to feel confident... Until lunch. I had believed that I was finished making a fool of myself, alas, I was wrong. Very wrong. I didn't even know how it had happened, but I suddenly found myself walking the hall with only Lexi by my side. We had been talking about Lexi's library shifts of the week, Lexi reiterating her schedule, while I subtly tried to plan our next date.

     "I have to babysit tomorrow," she started. "My parents are going out of town for the night... They said I could have someone over to keep me company."

     I nodded, already thinking of plans for another day, slow to take notice of the implications behind her tone.

     "Me?" I finally asked with a tone of surprise. "You meant that I could keep you company?"

     "Yes," she laughed, light blush a result of her invitation. "Only if you want to, though. Probably won't be much fun, my siblings can be a handful."

     "I'm sure they won't be that bad."

      The look on Lexi's face made it clear that she believed otherwise. "They will be all over you, especially Beau and Amy. Ella and Lacey will be more discrete, but there will definitely be the odd teasing and constant whispering. Noah shouldn't bother you much."

      "I'll be fine," I assured with a chuckle, already bouncing on my feet in excitement. This was my opportunity to really impress her.

     Lexi still looked skeptical. "Are you sure? I've babysat alone many times and managed just fine. They really aren't much trouble with me, but I don't want to overwhelm you."

      "I'm not the type to become easily overwhelmed."

      "I didn't think so." Lexi smiled. "But you're clearly going through something with your family, and it's alright that you take the time to deal with it."

      My eyes softened at the concern in her tone. "You don't need to worry about that," I promised. "It won't affect me... Honestly, it'll be nice to get my mind off of things."

      Lexi continued to chew at her lip and fidgeted with her fingers, until I stopped her. Paused in the hallway, I made sure that she got a good look at the sincerity in my expression.

      "I promise that in no way this will make things worse," I started, words light in amusement. "I love you, but you need to—"

     My sentence came to an abrupt halt. Very quickly I was no longer laughing. Though my tongue felt dry, I stuttered a few more words, choosing to attempt to go on as though nothing had happened. That didn't go as planned either. With Lexi's expression of confusion and surprise, I couldn't ignore the words that I had spoken. She would think me crazy. It was much, much, too soon for those words.

     "Um... Shouldn't— No worry. You, you— Uh, me—" with a defeated huff I gave up. "I need to— to pee! See you in class."

      Last remark exclaimed loudly, in a much higher pitch than my norm, I fled towards the nearest bathroom, not a glance shot back at the baffled girl. It wasn't my proudest moment, but I hid in the washroom until I was sure that Lexi was gone. She wouldn't risk being late to class. Catching a quick peak at Lexi collecting her books from her locker, still with pinched brows, I rushed to a more appropriate hiding spot.

      Between two sets of doors of a side exit, I collapsed on the dirty floor. My heart thundered behind my ribs every time I so much as thought of addressing the issue with Lexi. What had I been thinking? I hadn't... That was the problem. The words just slipped out.

      Ignoring the odd glances from some students returning from their lunch break, I remained sat in my corner, making no move to stand even when the bell rang. Knowing not how to get myself out of my latest mess, I tried to imagine what grandpa would suggest I do. I remembered his vow. Seconds following my thoughts of my grandmother's pie, grandpa appeared, and I heaved a breath of relief.

      "Oh, no." He grimaced upon taking notice of my state. "The floor's quite dirty you know."

     "I've got bigger problems than a dirty floor."

     Grandpa cackled. "What'd you do this time?"

     "It's not funny."

      Despite my complaints, his smirk remained. With a sudden look of disgust on his face, he forced himself to take a seat across from me, waiting patiently for me to go on.

      "My mouth accidently spoke words that were meant to be a thought." I avoided voicing a detailed description of my problem, staring at my feet in shame.

      Grandpa cocked a curious brow, seemingly unsure whether to be worried or to laugh.

      "It was nothing insulting," I assured, playing with my fingers as I mumbled. His look of disbelief made me continue. "I told her I loved her."

      Grandpa watched me blankly, still waiting for the punch line. "I should have known you would once again be making a big deal out of nothing."

      My head shot up, clearly affronted. "She's going to think I'm crazy!"

     "But did you mean it?"

      "Yes, but that doesn't matter. I know it's impractical to feel this way so quickly, and that's why I had decided to keep it to myself... There's no taking it back now though."

      "I'd hardly say impractical—"

      "We've been dating for 2 days!"

      "But you've known her longer than that."

      "Not that long," I countered. "She probably hasn't even decided if she actually likes me, yet."

      Shaking his head, grandpa laughed again.

     "Stop laughing and help me figure out what to say!"

      "I have no solution for you. This needs to come from you."

      "Then what's the point of you coming to my aid?" I demanded.

      "I believe I've asked you the same question in the past, and your answer was that I should hold your hand while you're being stabbed; present a reassuring distraction. So, I am metaphorically holding your hand, offering moral support while advising you to stop acting like a fool."

       I narrowed my eyes at him. "I'm not acting like a fool."

       "Lexi won't make a big deal out of this; she probably thinks you didn't mean it."

     "She may have thought so if I didn't panic afterwards."

      Visibly failing to bite back a snicker, grandpa did his best to take the matter seriously. It was a pathetic attempt. Lips occasionally twitching with his hidden amusement. "What did you say after?"

     "Following stuttered nonsense, I announced that I had to pee, and that I would meet her in class."

     "You just left her there?"

     I nodded.

     "Oh, Jaxson." He laughed even harder.

     "I panicked! I didn't know what to say!"

      Despite the narrowing of my eyes, grandpa kept laughing, hand clutching his abdomen. "Just be honest," he finally suggested, in between fits of laughter.

      I scoffed, making sure that my eyes portrayed my lacking faith in his advice. Be honest? That's what got me in this mess.

      "You've asked for my opinion," he reminded. "You know you have little time, it's important to let her know how you feel. And if you try to take it back, you might give her the wrong impression."

      "But the truth will freak her out."

      "Maybe settle for half of the truth.... It'll work out Jaxson. I think she cares for you more than you think."

      I looked at him skeptically. "And what makes you think that?"

      "Just a feeling. And she happened to walk out of class to check-up on you."

     I frowned, eyes growing wide when I caught sight of Lexi's reflection in the window. Frozen, my gaze remained fixed on grandpa in urgent plea. Pleading for what? I don't know, but grandpa was already coming to a stand.

      "Don't leave me," I requested urgently.

     "This is a private moment. I'm not staying."

      "But I need you," I complained. "She won't know you're here."

     "But you will, and if you, in any way, accidentally interact with me, you'll have much different problems to address with her."

      I didn't have time to argue. Before I could even open my mouth, grandpa disappeared and the door next to him was pushed open. I looked up and as expected, met a pair of familiar brown eyes.

      "What are you doing?" Lexi asked softly, brows pinched with concern.

     Still fixed on her eyes, I shrugged. "I panicked... I needed to clear my mind. Sorry."

     "There's no need to apologize," she reassured, standing awkwardly next to my sitting figure.

      "We better get to class." Ungracefully, I came to a stand, attempting to keep our conversation topic far from my latest declaration. "I wouldn't want you to miss something important because of me."

     "I don't mind," she promised. "I don't mean to pester... But are you sure you're alright?"

      I opened my mouth to assure her that I was fine, but grandpa's words echoed in my thoughts. Others likely wouldn't have noticed, but I had become good at reading her tells, and I knew that as grandpa had feared, Lexi had already received the wrong impression. She probably thought I meant love, as in the way you would a best or close friend. I had accidently confessed my (premature) love for her, and she thought I was about to friendzone her.

      Taking a deep breath, I froze at the door, partially blocking her way as a sign that I did need a moment. Lexi looked up patiently.

      "I meant it," I forced out in a single breath. Honesty it was. Maybe grandpa's advice was good. "I didn't mean to say it, I know that it's probably way too soon, but I figured that rather than lie, you may as well know."

      Eyes wide, it was Lexi's turn to find herself at a loss of words. She watched me with a mixture of surprise and delight, seemingly panicked with the idea of finding a polite response.

       "Don't say it back!" I urged, words escaping my mouth in a haste. "I don't expect you to say anything. I'd rather you not. I mean about this! Of course, I want you to talk... Can we address this situation at an appropriate time? Can we just pretend this slip-up didn't happen? I don't want this to ruin things between us. I can't already have messed this up, I—"

       My words coming out in too many numbers and too great of a speed, Lexi blinked in attempt to keep up. As if to quiet me, she placed one of her hands to my mouth, her other gently grabbing my hand in reassurance.

      "It's alright," she interrupted. "You haven't already messed up."

      "I appreciate you saying that, but I feel like you're just being nice. I know I asked you to ignore it, but if it really bothers you, I need—"

      Previous words of reassurance not having worked, and my mouth still moving furiously, Lexi tried the next best thing. Standing on the tip of her toes, just barely reaching her desired height, she brought her mouth to my moving one. Words coming to a startled end, my eyes flew open. Surprise vanishing almost instantly, I melted into her. My worries faded, mind incapable of thinking of anything other than the feeling of her lips against mine.

       Pulling away, Lexi blushed profusely. "Do you want to go to class now?" she asked, slightly breathless.

      I nodded simply, mind slow to process the rapid change of raced thoughts to a calm and content state. Only few feet down the hallway, did I finally recover.

      "Thank you for stopping me," I said, adding a groan as I replayed the events. "God, I swear I'm not always like this."

      "Like what?"

      Nothing her amused smile, playfully I narrowed my eyes. "Pathetic?" I suggested. "Constantly on the verge of a breakdown? Panicked? I could go on if you wish."

      Shaking her head, Lexi laughed. Lips moving as though to respond, I stopped her, already knowing that she would try to deny my suggestion.

      "Don't even try," I said. "I know I'm making a fool of myself, and I blame you Lexi-Grace."

     "Me?"

      "Yes, you. You'd be doing me a great favor if you could make yourself less likeable."

       Lexi laughed, small nose crunched upwards as she displayed both curiosity and the belief that my request was ludicrous.

       "Maybe you could pick your nose or insult me and my friends. Hit me with a car?"

       "Less likeable? As in I would still hold some likeability if I hit you with a car?"

      "Depends if you did so on purpose or not."

      "Say I did it on purpose?"

       Just to humor her, I pretended to consider my options. "Well, you'd probably have had a good reason for it."

       With a bright smile and twinkling eyes, she nudged me lightly. Briefly losing myself in the soft tone of her giggles, I couldn't help but share her amusement.

       "This," I teased, gesturing towards her general being. "Cute things like this really don't help me, Lexi," I accused.

      "Shut up." She was still laughing when we reached the classroom.

       Noting the entire class' attention on us, Lexi's state changed instantly. Having become comfortable around me; I forgot just how shy she truly was. The way, she ducked her head, face red as she met no one's eyes, not even her friends, tugged at my heart. I loved every side of her, but it hurt me to think that she thought so little of herself. Again, I swore to change it.