STELLA

The past few days have been busy with practices, auditions, wedding planning, and spending time with Melanie and the kids. Marco, overall, seems to be in a better mood; I assume Santino said something to him since they seem to be close.

He spent time with her yesterday as well as today. The smile on Melanie's face when she saw him for the first time yesterday was beautiful. She seems to be in better spirits as well, but I try not to get my hopes up.

JP and I have only communicated through text since the phone call a few days ago. I'd be lying if I said I didn't get excited every time his name flashes with a message from him, usually just simple texts, saying good morning, asking how my day is, and even goodnight.

But the guilt from what transpired between John Paul and I when he came to my room as well as all these old feelings I'm having reawaken within me while I'm now with Sean, is beyond overwhelming. 

I never thought I'd be in this position. Sean coming into my life was a surprise not only once but twice and I can't deny I feel good when he's around. However, when I'm around JP, it's like I'm the girl in all the books I've read, where my heart skips a beat when I'm in his presence or he in mine. I feel excited, energized and even--

No, stop it Stella. You're with Sean. He's good to you and for you. You're just confused because despite everything, you and JP were friends before you became more, but don't forget JP abandoned you when you needed him most in your life and he took his time finding you. Well, he didn't even find you, remember? You found him.

I nod to myself, but then JP's dark eyes flash in my mind, and the way he looks at me so intently like he's trying to look deep within my soul. All the things he said the night in my room come back to me and how sincere he sounded. The way his touch sends a warmth throughout my body. What am I saying?

I'm losing my mind, I groan to myself as I anxiously play with the napkin at the table I'm sitting at the little cafe, where I told Sean to meet me.

Nicky is sitting a few tables down from me but glances up now and then. I tried to convince him he didn't need to come, but he and the other guard in the car waiting insisted it was Boss's orders.

I gasp when hands cover my eyes. "Guess who?" I smile, but then I hurry and get up to hug Sean, knowing Nicky will back down once he sees I'm not in danger.

"It feels like forever since I've held you, gorgeous." Sean's warm breath tickles my neck. I gasp when I pull away and see Sean has a bruise under his eye and other scuffs on his face.

"What happened?" I trace his face gently.

He doesn't answer and kisses me deeply, instead; leaving me breathless when he pulls away. "Sorry, I couldn't help it. That's all I've thought about on the way here, well that and other things." He smirks.

I smile but then focus on his face again, "Are you going to tell me what happened, or am I going to have to beat it out of you?" I fold my arms. 

"I will, but I don't want to talk about that right now. Tell me how the week's been." He asks me and looks over the menu, but I tell him I already ordered food for us.

I eye him suspiciously, "We've talked every day, you know how my weeks been. What's going on, Sean?"

He sighs and looks up at me from the menu. "Jimmy." He says simply before reaching for my coffee and takes a sip. "He evaded us, and he has made some new friends with the Albanians."

"We're okay. Just a few scratches." He proceeds to tell me how they went to one of Jimmy's hideouts, only he and his Uncles and cousin were ambushed.

"Maybe you guys should scale it back. I don't know much about the Albanian organizations, other than they are not someone you can take on alone." Recalling a few things I heard through the grapevine when I was working for Cristian. They're quickly becoming predominant in the crime world and known for being extremely violent.

"My father has some business meetings this weekend, so we are taking a break in a way while we are here. but he's also meeting with Cristian tomorrow."

"He is?"

The waitress brings the food I had ordered ahead of time, knowing what Sean would like.

"Yeah, he wants to enlist Cristian's help and see if we could get some men, now that the Albanians are involved. Thanks, by the way." He refers to the food.

"Maybe I can be part of the meeting?" I ask, but Sean shakes his head no at me as he chews his food.

"Why not?" I question, setting down my fork.

"I know that look, Stella. It's not because I don't think you belong there." Sean keeps eating while I wait for him to explain further, tapping my fingers on my crossed arm.

"I don't want you to think less of him or my family, but my father and my family are old school, traditional in certain things..." He says and doesn't meet my eyes as he continues cutting his food.

"Let me guess, women only belong in the kitchen, barefoot and pregnant?" I raise an eyebrow.

"I wouldn't go that extreme. Women are equals...just not with the business end of things." He explains.

"Is that how you feel?"

Sean looks up at me and swallows his food. I can tell he's thinking about what he's going to say carefully, but the hesitation on his end is what is killing me.

"No, I don't."

"You hesitated." I point out.

He leans back on his chair, sighing deeply. "You're the exception with a lot of things, Stella. Just because you are capable of being in a room full of men and not afraid to state your difference of opinion or share insight on a particular subject does not mean all women are."

"How do you know other women aren't capable if not given the chance or opportunity?"

"I don't want to argue about this. You and I were not meant to be involved as deep as we are in this world." He looks at me seriously.

"Yet, here we are."

"You and I are only focusing on Jimmy and Gio. I don't care about any of the other bullshit, and I know you sure as hell don't." Sean argues.

"It's all tied together, one way or another, whether we like it or not, Sean." I counter.

"Maybe, but it won't matter once Jimmy and Gio are dead." He comments as he begins eating his food again. My appetite is long gone as I poke at the food on my plate.

"So, are you ready for tonight?" His question only brings JP to my mind. Now's a good a chance as any to tell him about John Paul also being a guardian with me, I decide.

"It's been a stressful week, but yes, it should be fine," I respond.

Sean snorts, "What's to stress about? I mean, all you're doing is grinding on the floor or pole and shaking your ass."

My eyes snap to him, "I've also been helping with the hiring process and auditions. I let you know that if you've been paying attention at all during the week."

"That's not what I meant; I'm sorry it came out wrong."

"I think it came out exactly how you intended, Sean." I stand and leave some money on the table. Nicky follows behind me as I walk out.

Sean catches up to me and grabs my arm. Nicky grips Sean by the shoulder, keeping him from getting closer to me. The waitress interrupts asking for payment, and I tell her I left it on the table. She nods to another waitress to go and confirm the money was left.

"Who's this?" Sean asks, his angry blue eyes focus on Nicky.

"My detail," I state simply. I tell Nicky to release Sean in Italian, and then I walk outside, not wanting to draw any more attention to us.

"Stella, don't leave angry." Sean blocks my way to the waiting SUV.

"I know you do more than dance. I just...I wish you weren't doing it." He holds my waist and brings me closer to him; his eyes soften as he looks at me.

"It's been a long, stressful week with dealing and talking about Jimmy and now the Albanians. Not sure if you noticed, but I got my ass kicked."

I laugh, "No, you didn't." Sean pulls me in and wraps his arms around me.

"I need to tell you something, Sean."

He leans away to look at me, "Is it going to make me happy or not?"

More like angry, probably. Maybe not though, Sean seems more level-headed than...never mind. I should even start comparing them.

"Um, maybe not-not happy?"

Sean laughs, "What does that even mean?

"I should have told you sooner, but I've been trying to come to terms with it myself, still."

His phone rings, and he answers quickly. "Yeah, I can be there." He checks his watch, "Give me ten minutes." Sean looks back at me when he stuffs his phone back in his pocket.

"Can this wait?"

I shake my head, "No, it can't, but it's not something to rush through either, Sean."

"Okay, let's meet up tomorrow, or do you want me to come over after your shift tonight? Wait, I don't even know where you're staying unless you are still at the Penthouse?"

"Yeah, but I may be moving, which is why this can't wait."

"I promise we'll talk tomorrow, okay?" He kisses me before he leaves, heading to his car.

I watch as he gets in and drives away quickly to wherever he's going. I should have just come out and said it, but I didn't want just to blurt it out. "Hey Sean, you remember JP, my ex-boyfriend, lover, fiancé? Well, it turns out we are both named as guardians for Mel's kids." I say aloud.

"Signorina Stella...stai bene?" I jump when Nicky speaks up, forgetting he was there. (Are you okay?)

"Si, va tutto bene," I tell him and get in the SUV. Even though I know in my heart, everything is not okay and will get more complicated. (Yes, everything is fine)

Lucy greets me when I walk back into the Penthouse.

"Where are Kai and Miles?"

"They're at the Villa, hanging out with Marco and some of his friends; Joey and Topo took them there," Lucy tells me.

"What's this?"

"I'm working on some outfits ideas for Carmen, Lola, and little Toby." She shows me some of her sketches.

The first one is a sketch of a three-piece suit for a toddler boy. The drawing has a dress shirt and tie, with dress pants. The following sketch is of overalls with a T-shirt and another sketch with a polka dot skirt and a cute blouse, and the last sketch is a pretty floral sleeveless dress.

"These are great, Luce. I love how you get these ideas in your head and can put them on paper." I tell her.

"Thanks," She smiles. "Do you think we can find a fabric store around here? Isabella said she has a sewing machine I could borrow."

I had no idea Isabella was into this sewing. I need to spend some more time with her to get to know her better and make up for the lost time.

"Yes, of course. Do you want to go now?"

"Sure." She hops off the stool.

Nicky doesn't seem to mind to head back out and smiles at Lucy when she greets him.

"Maybe, you can go with the boys tonight. I don't want you here by yourself tonight." I tell her as I climb into the SUV.

"Sure, it would be fun to see Carmen and Lola again," Lucy tells me as she buckles herself in.

We spend the car ride and the time walking around the fabric store talking about the girls, and she tells me she's heard from her friend Anna since we got to New York; she's on vacation with her family.

"I've meant to ask you, last weekend when we were doing that tour at Columbia, and I noticed you took a brochure, did something catch your eye there?" I ask as she pulls different fabrics out and inspects them.

"Um, yeah, but it was silly." Lucy tucks some of her hair behind her ear as she moves down another aisle.

"What is? You want to go to Columbia?"

She glances over at me and nods. "I looked into it, and you have to have like super good grades, and it's crazy expensive."

"You do have excellent grades, Lucy, and if that's where you want to go, I'd be happy to help."

She shakes her head quickly. "No, you've already done so much, it wouldn't feel right for you to pay for my schooling, like that. I'm sure I could go to community college and go from there."

"Well, you're fifteen, so you still have time to apply for scholarships or grants if you don't want my help. But you deserve to go to school where you want to go, you work hard, and you have so much talent, Lucy, and I would love to help you, you know that."

She gives me a hug, "Thanks, mom."

<><><><><>

"Is it weird I'm excited?" Jessica asks while zipping up her black leather boots. "It feels like we haven't performed in ages. I know we've been practicing, but it's different when you feel the energy of a live crowd." She sprays hairspray in her hair and tightens the half updo she has her hair styled in.

"What about you, Stella?" Victoria asks me. "Did you tell everyone that you're dancing yet?"

"Annalisa and Sam know. But everyone else..." I shake my head.

"Girl, why not?" Letty asks.

"You know me; I like to shock and wow," I say sarcastically, straitening after I zip up my own black gladiator high-heeled boots.

"You'll understand why I didn't say anything when they see me." I turn to face them. Imagining the shock and disbelief that will undoubtedly occur. I'm sure at some point someone will laugh, thinking it's some joke, probably. But, then, I'm banking on someone trying to stop me from going out there again, making a scene; that'll probably be JP for sure.

Rio walks in with Eva, and Eva helps Destiny zip up her leather skirt from behind then fixes the straps on Victoria's garters.

"Ladies, I know this is not our usual clientele. These men are a bit more...refined, so don't be surprised if the mood isn't as energetic as we are used to; it is, however, quite the crowd out there.

And remember, tomorrow it will double. Also, the men have been encouraged to ask for lap dances, so if you are selected to go to a private room, please know we have enough security on hand to keep you safe."

"What if we don't want the extra company?" Letty asks teasingly, we all know she's not one to give extra's, but then again, if she's with Rocco, she might.

Rio turns his hard gaze on her and walks up to her slowly, and she shrinks a little under his dominating presence. "No extra stuff, Letty. These two nights have a lot riding for me, and I don't need you to fuck it up because you can't keep your legs closed or someone's cock out of your mouth."

Letty's mouth drops open in shock at his harsh words while we all collectively gasp. Rio usually treats her sexual innuendo comments with mild amusement.

Eva even seems surprised and reprimands him in Spanish, but he disregards her and turns to the rest of us. "Have a good show, ladies." Eva rubs Letty's arm as she follows Rio out, but Rio stops in front of me before walking off. "And Stella, no surprises, I mean it."

I look at him and pull my lips in, raising my eyebrows. "Sure thing, pretty boy." Little does he know his over-the-top reaction on Letty just changed that for me.

Letty catches on to the nickname and covers her sudden laugh with a cough. Rio looks back at her, but she turns away before he sees her smiling at me.

We walk towards the stage and wait until the DJ begins his welcome. "Let's get the show started, everyone; I hope you're all ready for a good time. But, first, let's introduce our ladies for the night!"

The song for our first group number begins Buttons by the Pussycat Dolls. The long intro gives the DJ enough time to introduce each one, as we take turns doing a little dance showcasing something different. "Let's welcome, Destiny...Tori...Baby...Dulce and Raven!"

And just like I figured, the music isn't loud enough to mask the audible gasps and the sound of someone or maybe several people choking on their drinks.

There's no turning back now.

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