He had sweaty palms, breathing short and shallow, like he'd run a marathon, but he hadn't. He'd run in to grab his lucky charm he'd never gone to any book launches or parties without. Terry always organised a new shindig for every one of his new releases. Tonight was one of those nights, and he needed that charm, he needed all the charm and luck tonight. He was feeling more nervous than usual.

He rummaged through the desk drawers. Scanned the bookshelves, or peered under piles of folders, nervously eyeing his sister standing at the front door, baby in hand, glaring at him, or what little of him she could see.

"Hurry up, Chad!" she yelled, pacifying the wailing baby. "You will be late for your own party."

"It's not a party," he yelled back, correcting her. "And I can't find it," he added, feeling like he was profusely sweating into his fresh shirt. "God, and now I need a fresh shirt!"

"You don't need a fresh shirt," Jo yelled back. Behind her, Tom honked the horn. "What you need is to get your ass out here."

Chad could hear Tom, "What the hell is taking him so long? Here, give Ciara to me, and go help him along."

"Are you trying to get Terry to kill you?" Jo hovered at the study door, watching Chad pace in front of his desk. "Where do you normally keep Mr Panther?" she finally asked.

Chad pointed in the general vicinity of his bookshelf. "He's always there."

Jo scanned the bookshelf quickly, more aware of the time than he was obviously. The launch started at six. Terry would briefly give a talk, as usual, welcome the press and the guests alike, and then introduce Chad, as Zachary Eve, at around six-fifteen.

"It's already five-thirty, Chad. This is not the best time to be having a crisis because you can't find the Pink Panther toy you use as a talisman when speaking in public." She was saying as she walked around the room, her eyes skimming the surfaces.

Chad continued to rifle through papers and such with no clear direction.

"Chad, I'm not kidding. You will be late. I should have told you this years ago." She grabbed him by his shoulders and talked to him as if he were a child. "Mr Panther is just a toy. He has no powers to calm your nerves, or to make your speeches go swimmingly. I made that shit up. As a kid, it was cute to watch you fill with confidence when you had him in your hand. As an adult, it was no longer cute."

Chad shrugged her off. "I know that. I'm not a child. It's a habit. He makes me feel comfortable." He glanced around the room one last time.

"Bloody hell, Chad, just move it." Jo pushed him out the door. "You're a man. Be a man."

"But."

"You don't have time for this shit." She closed the study door behind them and continued pushing him towards the front door. "June might be there tonight. You want to miss that?"

Chad resigned to the pushing and walked out of his own volition. "You don't know if she will be."

"No. I don't. So go do your thing."

♡

Chad paced the corridor outside the toilets. It was going swimmingly so far. They'd arrived minutes before six. Tom had booted all passengers out of his car to go find parking on his own so Chad could get in on time. Tom didn't have to wait too long as Terry had reserved a spot for their car.

Chad had arrived just as Terry was about to lose her shit. Then she'd smiled through gritted teeth and given him a look of disapproval before turning on her charm and taking the stage. Moments later Chad had followed her, said many things, mostly unfiltered mumbling like the buffoon he was, eliciting some laughter to mark his success. He did his usual spiel of why he wrote the book, and then told the guests to enjoy the night, and not to leave without a signed copy.

He'd then gone over to the table piled high with his new book, For Fay, signing copies till all two-hundred guests. He'd then done the mandatory mingling, which too had gone fantastic until he spotted a familiar face in the crowd too briefly before she disappeared. He had wanted to run after her but didn't want to be rude to his wonderful publishers gushing about the new book.

By the time he thought to use the toilet as an excuse, he wasn't even sure he'd seen her or imagined it like many times before.

"What are you doing here?" Terry sighed in relief when she walked into the corridor like a hurricane. "One server told me where to find you. People have been asking for you, and instead of mingling, you go MIA." She put her hands on her hips. "What's going on with you today? Jo told me you seemed off even before you left."

Chad leaned against a wall to stop from pacing.

"It's me, Chad. We've been through shit before. Tell me what's bothering you so I can fix it? Is it the launch?"

He shook his head. "No, the night was beautiful, Terry, as always."

"Then what is it?"

Chad remained quiet.

"June?" Terry asked finally. He nodded. "I thought she would come too. I was certain she would come, actually." She leaned on the wall beside him. "I even sent her an advance copy and a car to pick her up tonight."

Chad turned to her in surprise. "How?" he asked. For all he knew, June had vanished. Her old number was no longer in service. He had no idea where she'd moved, or even the few times he'd gone back to the park in search of her, no one had heard of her. She was no longer living on the streets, so at least that was some comfort. How had Terry found the woman?

"She still works at the same café. One guy there, Lin–cute really, told me where she's been living." Terry smiled, rubbing his arm sympathetically. "I know you no longer go there or anywhere. I'm sorry, Chad," she ruefully smiled at him. "I really thought she would come tonight. I wanted her to come tonight."

"Me too." He quietly watched Terry's beautiful hands stroke his. "I guess I used up all my luck when I met her."

"At least you met her." Terry pushed off the wall as guests walked past them to the bathroom. She pulled him off the wall too. "Come on, let's get this party wrapped up, take the last few photos, and you can go home and spend time with Bridget." She winked, making Chad flush pink.

"We've been through shit together." She led him back out into the hall. "Let's wrap this up. What say?"

♡

Within half hour, Chad gave Terry's cheek a goodnight kiss, and walked out of the hall, into the city street, keen to call a ride and escape. With the baby so young, he'd sent his family home earlier. With Marjorie and Jackson also tagging along, the car had been full. He was glad to he was alone with his thoughts.

As he walked down the steps, guests waiting around for their rides waved at him.

"Wonderful launch, Zachary!" A small group of overdressed ladies giggled, loose on champagne as they got into their taxi.

"Thank you, and thank you for coming," he called out as one of them rolled down the window and blew him a kiss, almost half out of the cab, her breast bouncing as she giggled some more.

"We love you!" she yelled as the taxi pulled away.

Chad shook his head, watching them disappear with slight amusement. He could have probably taken one of those ladies' home tonight if it inclined him, which it hadn't. He may never be again.

"Is that what a girl has to do to get your attention nowadays?" a voice whispered behind him, from the shadows, startling him.

"I'm sorry, what?" He turned, not sure what the woman meant.

A figure stepped out of the shadows, mocking the ladies and their shimmying boobs, her breasts pinched together between her arms, a beautiful yet nervous smile playing on her lips, her brown eyes full of sparkle, even in the night. "Congratulations on the book."

"You came?"

"Kind of hard not to, seeing how it was about me?" She flashed him the book in her hand.

Chad cleared his knotting throat. His gaze dropped to his feet as last of the guests waved at him, curiously scanning June before him.

"You changed the name." She shuffled her feet.

Chad nodded. "Had to."

She bit her lip. "And you finished it."

"Had to. Contract."

June nodded, turning her face away from the guests getting in their rides.

"Congratulations again, Mr Eve. Wonderful stuff!"

"Thanks for coming." Chad waved at them before saying, "They're press."

June nodded in acknowledgment. "So, um... he loves her?" she asked, gaze skittering to his face to check his reaction.

Chad chuckled to himself a little, unable to rein in his emotions. "With all his heart." They were no longer talking about the characters in the book and to drive home the point, he repeated himself. "With all my heart."

June sniffled, wiping her nose in the dark. Her head bobbing as she took an unsteady, audible breath. "Okay. I'm ready to go home now."

What just happened? Chad shook his head in confusion. How did it go from him professing his love to her, to her being ready to leave him within minutes? "I..."

June met his gaze, her own eyes glistening in the mix of moonlight and city lights. "If you'll still have me," she whispered, nervous as anything.

It took Chad a moment to put two and two together. Home meant his home. Their home. He nodded. In fact, he could not stop nodding. "Fuck yes!" he said, and without a second to waste, he took her face in his hands, and kissed her like he had wanted to for a long time; as if she were air itself. "Fuck yes! I'll have you any which way you let me."

He kissed her again and again, as if making up for all the days and weeks and months he'd missed. "I'm so, so sorry. I never meant to hurt you."

"I'm sure Fay forgives you," June whispered, nibbling his lip, "but I might need more convincing."

Chad had to laugh. "So, cab home?"

She leaned into his body. "I will also accept a signed copy as an apology."

"Anything." He kissed her evermore, scooping her into his arms.

Terry spotted them as the two got into their ride and smiled before hailing a taxi.

... this chapter continues in the next part...

(Image by ArtTower on Pixabay)