January, 2015

    When Mooney's closed that night, each of the six friends left as a different person. All of their lives changed drastically after that.

    Milo's mother succumbed to her illness a week after Ever's funeral. Milo didn't think he could handle that loss when he hadn't even been given the time to grieve Ever. He replayed the thought of giving up, quitting life, so many times that he imagined the fictional record player in his conscience exploding into a million fragments of his personality, each fragment sparking a fire until their was nothing left of him. But he kept trying. He didn't know how, or why, but he did. It was hard at first. He couldn't find a steady job, resulting in his mother's house being foreclosed on and him being homeless. His displacement wasn't long, however. When Jay got word of Milo's predicament, he raced across town to give Milo a newspaper clipping of an apartment tenant looking for a new roommate. The rent was cheap, and Jay promised that the tenant would give Milo time to get up on his feet before having to pay any bills. Milo went to the apartment the next day. Before he could even knock, Jay threw the door open with a wide smile. It was Jay's apartment. Milo had never felt more at home.

    Jay's pay check from his janitorial position was stretched thin between paying all of the bills, and feeding two mouths instead of one, but once Milo found work as a gas station attendant, their financial burdens were relieved. Still, however, Milo wasn't happy. Working at the gas station was only a small step above mowing lawns. He felt he could do so much better with his life than working nine-to-five for minimum wage. He had too much potential. So he decided to get his GED. He hadn't realized how much he remembered of all the things he learned in high school, and, with Jay helping him study, Milo received his GED in a little over a month. After that, he signed up for classes at a local college in the fall.

    With Ever in mind, Iggy began to expand her horizons beyond the salon. On her off days, despite the heartbreak of sacrificing time with her ever-growing son, she began doing side jobs for clients outside of the salon. Her first gig was with the teenage daughter of her oldest client. She provided the hair and makeup for the girl on her birthday, and then that one girl turned into all of her friends, and then those friends' friends, and then those friends' mothers, until Iggy found herself overbooked. From 5 o'clock in the morning, until midnight every day, she worked. It got to the point where Isabel stepped into the mothering role for Isaac, from dressing him for preschool every morning before the eventful drive there wherein Isaac would recite everything he learned the previous day, which was always Iggy's favorite part, to getting him ready for bed every night. By the time Iggy got home, Isaac was too far gone in his sleep for her to check-in with him. To make matters worse, the salon's owner, Marissa, was getting suspicious.

    Everything came to a head when Marissa called Iggy into her office in the back of the salon one day. Iggy collected her belongings, almost positive that she was getting fired. What happened was the opposite. Apparently, Iggy's side jobs had been attracting a lot more business to the salon, boosting their clientele to twice the size it had been since Iggy began working there. Marissa offered Iggy a managerial position, which entailed a lot less hours but a lot more pay. Iggy was able to reclaim her role as Isaac's mother, and was even able to take him to work with her some days. The old women that came in to cover their gray hairs would fawn over Isaac while Iggy stood behind with the smirk of a proud mother. Marissa fell in love with Isaac as well, since she was not able to have her own children. Iggy began bringing him to work with her even more until, during her break on an ordinary day, Marissa offered Iggy ownership of her second salon in southern California. Iggy asked her why she would do such a kind thing. Marissa smiled broadly, and with the brim of her eyes welling like the storm drains after the rain, she said, "Isaac asked me too."

    The first thing Marty did the night after leaving Moony's was shoot up the last of his heroin. It was the last night of his life. The life of constant intoxication, forgotten days, Merida, and the rundown apartment building on the other side of town. The next morning, his phone flashed with a call from Merida. He answered, but the only thing he wanted to say, and the only thing he did say, was, "Never call me again." It was after that that Marty packed up the few belongings of his in his parent's basement and left to begin a series of long rides from bus station to bus station to the detox facility on the other side of the state. He had seen a commercial for the facility on a random night some months ago when he was too high to do anything but lay on the couch, watching the different people and places flash across the screen in bright streaks. The only thing that was clear was that commercial. He didn't think he would even remember it, but when he searched through the fragments of his memory, he remembered the phone number as clearly as he remembered Ever's. He called them during the first bus ride. As soon as they heard of his situation, they immediately agreed to take him in.

    The first few days at the facility were some of the worst he had ever experienced. Every part of his body ached with an insurmountable pain. His usually even-tempered demeanor was replaced with a behavior highlighted by violent, lashing mood swings. He had to constantly remind himself that that was not him. That was his addiction making its last, futile attempts at taking him over. The longer he was treated, the more the influence of his addiction lost its voice. The aches were lightened every day, and he felt himself experiencing what true happiness was within the safe tranquility of the facility. He began to see the tides turn in his relationships as well. His parents were proud of him for the first time in a long time. They visited him almost every week, along with his brothers. He got a phone call from Jay, Milo, or Todd every day. Since Iggy's salon was so close by, she began visiting him on Sunday. She brought Isaac with her. Marty had never met a child as wonderful as Isaac. As extra incentive, Iggy promised to name Marty the godfather of her son if he successfully completed treatment and maintained his sobriety. He did, even after his release from the facility. And as homage to Ever, Marty began attending college classes not too far from Milo. Marty's aspirations in life grew as vast as the ocean. Suddenly, college didn't seem like such a waste of time anymore.

    Jay was stuck in a rut. As he watched Iggy's career as a salon owner blossom, and Milo and Marty's dreams being met through their pursuit of higher education, he didn't feel like he was capable of having the same success. He never drank again, but he would not describe that as a success because he never had a problem with alcoholism in the first place. Besides a few factories and his janitorial job, no place was willing to hire a convicted felon. But since the pay was better, he did accept a position making car parts in one of the factories.

    Jay began to associate with a new group of friends through his job. Many of them played on an amateur football team, of which they relentlessly begged Jay to join once they learned of his previous football career. Jay would always decline their invitations. In part because he felt as though he had moved on with his life, but mostly out of fear. He hadn't played football since his conviction, and was afraid to discover that he could no longer do the thing that he had once dedicated his entire life to. Despite his decline to play, he went to his friends' games anyway. He would watch from the sidelines as their team endure defeat after defeat. It was painful to watch his friends leave the field dirty and dejected after every game, but the worst pain was the ache of him actually wanting to play. His fear began to manifest into an intense urge, an irrefutable desire to put on his old helmet and jersey. He fought the feeling relentlessly until it consumed every inch of him like a riptide. During one of the games, of which his friends' team was losing horrendously, Jay angrily threw on a spare Jersey, and stormed the field. And, oh, when his shoes met the green, he felt electric. In his previous career as a football player, he had never made as many touch downs in a single game as he did that day. Jay officially joined the team after that. He played in every game as Marty, Todd, Milo, Iggy, and Isaac cheered him on from the sidelines. Soon, scouts began to attend the games as well, and before Jay knew it, he was being recruited to a league of a higher echelon. It wasn't the NFL, but Jay was happy. Incredibly happy.

    Todd's near-fight with Milo at Moony's convinced him that he needed a lot more counseling and a lot more anger management before he could get back to being the guy he used to be. The guy who was too in love with life to wallow in any pitfalls along the way. The guy who was too busy making friends to find himself in a fight. Most importantly, the guy that Ever loved. Todd's visits with Dr. Tov became more frequent, and he found his emotions becoming a lot more balanced, but he still wasn't fulfilled. He needed something else, something bigger than his sole existence. He wanted to do something that would impact someone else's life. That was when he gave Doogie a call. Doogie was still too deep in her trauma to talk to Todd, but she did give short replies to his text messages every once in a while. It was in one of their text conversations that Todd was able to convince her to see Dr. Tov. He had to stress that Dr. Tov was a woman multiple times before Doogie even considered going, but she reluctantly agreed.  It took a lot of sweet-talk on Todd's part for Dr. Tov to accept a new client in her overflowing schedule of damaged people. The day of Doogie's first appointment, Todd waited anxiously by his phone all day for a message from Doogie, but what he got was a call. A call in which, although riddled with sobs, Doogie expressed gratitude. As Todd waited for her timid words between each sob, he felt, for the first time in a very long time, that he actually had a purpose.

    Dr. Tov had cleared her schedule in order to dedicate an entire day to Doogie's first appointment. After the first two hours were spent with Dr. Tov coaxing Doogie from her cell of silence, the remainder of the day consisted of Doogie pouring her heart out about that night in the alley. Dr. Tov gave Doogie the comfort and the safety to speak of all the things she could never speak of before. The more sessions Doogie attended over the course of eight months, the more she discovered herself leaving her cell behind. She wanted to be normal again, to go to school again, and, more than anything, to feel comfortable with her friends again. So, she began to push herself. It began with her talking on the phone with Todd, and then accompanying her mother to the grocery store. She still preferred her mother to chose a check-out lane with a female cashier, but felt herself becoming whole again, and it was because of Todd's relentless pestering of her to seek treatment with Dr. Tov. All of her progress during those eight months resulted in meeting with Todd, in person, for lunch on one of the days he had off of work. She couldn't sit too closely to him, or even hold eye contact with him at first, but the more he talked and the more he looked at her, the more comfortable she was with his presence. She wasn't ready for something as big and boisterous as going to one of Jay's football games, but she worked up to being with more than one friend at a time. She began spending her time away from her schooling with Todd, and then it was Todd and Iggy, and the it became Todd, Iggy and Milo, and then Marty and Jay began to join in, and it felt like the old days in high school, only with the large, irreversible gap of where Ever's presence should have been.

    Despite the contented, reminiscent tones of her meetings with her friends, a part of Doogie preferred it when it was just her and Todd. She had never really had a crush on a guy before, and that night in the alley robbed her of any hope she had of experiencing what it would be like to date or be in a relationship. But her first meeting with Todd restored some of those hopes. She was too shy to tell Todd how she felt, and was even more reluctant when she thought of the irony of a battered woman dating a woman-beater, even though Todd was only a one-time offender in that category. She confided in Dr. Tov about her growing feelings for Todd. Surprisingly, Dr. Tov insisted that Doogie express it to Todd. Dr. Tov went on to explain that the pinnacle of Doogie's recovery would be to confront a man head-on. Although it was difficult, and gave Doogie a couple of panic attacks, confronting Todd was exactly what she did. During one of their one-on-one meetings, Doogie mustard all of the courage she had, which really wasn't much, and blurted out every word like she was going for the Guinness Book's world record of fastest talker, "I-have-a-really-big-crush-on-you-and-I-think-I-might-have-always-had-a-crush-on-you-but-I-was-too-afraid-to-say-so-and-then-that-night-in-the-alley-ruined-any-hope-or-desire-I-had-of-being-with-a-guy-and... and... I-just-really-like-you!" And then Doogie cried as Todd watched her in wide-eyed surprise. After a moment that felt like it expanded into a hundred years, Todd burst into a fit of inconsolable, gut-wrenching laughter. Doogie was horrified by his reaction at first, until she realized how utterly ridiculous she must have seemed. Her own laughter mingled with his in the middle of the diner until a very red-faced waitress insisted that they leave. Outside of the diner, once their laughter died-down enough to allow communication, Todd asked her out on a date. Doogie didn't hesitate to accept.

    One year after Ever's funeral, the six of them held their promises to meet under the pier at Ellingston beach. It required quite a bit of shuffling around different schedules, but they made it nonetheless. The promises they made that night at Mooney's were far more important to them than missing a day of work or skipping a couple of classes.

    Milo, the ever-so-punctual one, showed up first. It was nearing close to sunset when he planted his shoes and back-pack in the sand as the waves lapped against the rocks and the seagulls circled over his head. He sat in the damp grains, his chin propped on his knee and a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. He thought of how nothing had changed at Ellingston beach, but everything else in the world had. Well, in his world, at least.

    Jay was next. He would have arrived with Milo if he had not picked up a couple of extra hours during his shift at the auto factory. Unlike Milo, who trudged through the sand with a mindset concerned with getting to the pier rather than paying any mind to the journey it took to get there, Jay walked with the patience and the willingness to appreciate the journey. With each careful step, he thought of how far he had come in the last year of his life. He thought of how great his new football career had been shaping up to be, and he thought of his new position as supervisor of the factory, and he thought of how Ever would be so proud of him. He sat next to Milo with a matching smile.

    Iggy and Marty arrived at the same time. They walked down the beach, their toes soaked in the sea's salts, with Isaac swinging in between them and each of his little hands tucked into one of Iggy's and the other in one of his godfather's, Marty. As Iggy and Marty smiled down at the five-year-old between them, their eyes couldn't help but water at the thought of it being Isaac's first time at Ellingston beach, the place that Ever loved so dearly. Isaac reminded them so much of Ever. He was so smart, so independent and, god, was he so full of life. It seemed like every day he was gabbing to his mother and godfather about all the possibilities and all of the potential he had. One day he wanted to be a firefighter, and the next he wanted to be the president. But more than anything, Isaac was an artist. He left his colorful, vibrant mark on everything he touched. Just like Ever.

    Todd and Doogie came together in Todd's old Ford. It took a lot for them not to hold hands as they stepped through the sand washed in the hues of the fast approaching sunset. Instead, their cheeks took on shades of red when they shared glances every now and again. Todd thought she was beautiful with her wild, curly hair and bright dress billowing in the breeze. Doogie was too timid to even submit to the thought of him looking handsome under the light of the sun. Despite this, they sat close to one another in the sand beside their friends. When Todd's hand grazed her's, their breaths hitched. Then they quietly chuckled and how ridiculously obvious Ever would find their relationship to be. They imagined Ever laughing  heartily beside them.

    Iggy smiled brightly. "So, shall we discuss the exigence of compatible signs in romantic relationships?"

    Isaac's nose crinkled as he looked up at Iggy from her lap. "Mama, what does ex-ee-gent mean?"

    The lot of them laughed like they never had before.

    After the laughter was carried away on the ocean breeze, they six friends shared all of their progress over the last year.

    Milo talked of how he had been going to school at a local technical institute. It was nothing big, like he once dreamed of. It was quaint, but he liked it. A lot. He was earning his bachelor's degree in Digital Entertainment and Game Design. Between Marty pestering him about how cool it was to be designing video games, Milo expressed how he thought it would be nice to pursue something so creative. He garnered a lot of his inspiration from all of the paintings Ever used to make for him in high school. It seemed like she was constantly drawing or painting or sculpting. Milo always admired her artistic abilities. Now, he was harnessing his own artistry. He was so excited for where this new passion could lead him in life. He was no longer the scared kid who saw the ghosts of his friends around every corner. He was an adult full of excitement, paving a path of accomplishment in his life. He had Ever to thank for that.

    Marty had been clean for one year, to the day. He never knew how many days there really were in a year until he marked them on his calendar, one by one, to discover that it had been exactly 365 days since his last high. When he first got to the detox facility, he never even entertained the thought of being sober for a month, but looking back on the past year of making memories that he could actually remember, he wondered why he had not tried to get sober sooner. Nevertheless, he wouldn't regret the time in his life spent with Merida in the back alley behind Go-Go's Go-Girl or the rundown apartment building, because it made him realize what true happiness really was. For Marty, his happiness was studying Sociology in college, applying for his first job, watching Isaac grow up, and being in the company of his best friends. He had to admit, there were times when this new life seemed overwhelming. Times when he wanted to give up, to grab his syringes and heroin before crawling in a hole somewhere and pulling its end in behind him. But when he thought of Ever, and thought of how proud she would be to see him doing so well, he refused to give up. He could not give up on her.

    Jay felt the same way. His life would never be the same as it was before the night of the car accident, but he thought of that accident as a blessing in disguise. He never felt like he had a direction or purpose before. All he did was go to school, hang out with his friends, and play football. That was all he saw himself doing in life to the point where he lost his appreciation for all of those things. It was only after Ever's death that he realized how great of a life he had before that night with Andrew, and that he would not stop until he found his passion again. His passion for football, which was actually unintended, and his passion for life. Being promoted to supervisor of the auto factory gave him stability. Playing football again gave him spirit. Reconnecting with his friends gave him life. And his new-found relationship with his co-worker, Mia, gave him the vigor to hold onto these things for dear life. He had everything he ever wanted, now. He just wished Ever was there to celebrate with him. It was her, after all, that bettered their lives.

    Iggy used her time to gloat about Isaac's successes. Isaac was at the top of his class. He was only in kindergarten, but his reading and math levels were equal to that of a second grader's. Iggy was in talks with the principle of Isaac's elementary to skip him up to the second grade. Every now and then, Iggy would add in a small tidbit about herself, like how great the salon was doing, how she had expansion plans for the business, and how she was getting back into dating. The last man she had been with was Isaac's father, who's identity still remained anonymous. Over the last couple of months, she had gone on a few dates with men, but she could not envision any of them being a father figure to her son. It was weird to look back on her dating history before Isaac. The only qualification was that they guy had to be attractive. Now, she decided that she would only pursue relationships that were nothing short of what Ever always said Iggy deserved. At one point, Ever actually devised a checklist for Iggy to apply to every guy she dated: job, car, post-secondary education, intelligent, kind, funny, good with children, wants children, and then a portion of that accounted for looks. But only a small portion. Ever's list became an integral part of Iggy's life. With it, Iggy finally recognized her worth and what she deserved.

    Todd and Doogie had big news for the rest of their friends: They were in a relationship, and were currently moving Doogie into Todd's house. Their announcement was met with applause, and a few tears from Iggy, who was always a sucker for love. It was no surprise to the rest of their friends when Doogie declared that her sessions with Dr. Tov were successful. Not only was she pursuing a relationship with Todd, but she transferred from online classes to physically attending college again, and she resumed her job at Super 8 Supermarket. Todd had a surprise, however. His job at the auto repair shop was great; he even received a raise, boosting his wages to double the minimum wage. The real surprise, however, was that he finally fixed up the old Ford. Although it took a lot for him to get to that point, he was able to remove the old parts that his father worked so restlessly on, replace the windshield, and he was even able to give it a new paint job. Instead of the weather-worn maroon his father kept it as, Todd changed it to a bright orange, one of Ever's favorite colors. The new condition of the Ford was the physical representation of Todd's growth. He was no longer the angry guy that found temporary solace in the number of bruises on his knuckles. He was content. He let go of all the anger and all the heartache. He was a new man. A better man. The only person that could have been even more proud of him than Doogie was Ever.

    After the friends had shared all they had to share, Marty said, "None of us won the lottery or built a time machine, but I think we've done pretty good for ourselves."

    Then, Milo stood up from the sand with his back pack in his hand and a tear in his eye. From his bag, he pulled out the package of a Chinese lantern in the shade of the brightest orange he could find, and said, "On the fourth of July before Ever went away to college, she told me that she never liked the firework displays, but she always loved the Chinese lanterns at the end, so I figured that this would be the best way to say our final goodbyes to her."

    The friends helped Milo assemble the lantern while Isaac played with the packaging.

    Once Milo lit the wick, he held the lantern over his head where the breeze gently licked at the flame, sending it dancing in a frenzy. He spoke with a smile encircled with tears, like a bright island in the middle of a vast ocean. "Each one of us has found a new reason to live... and we did it for Ever."

    He gave the lantern over to the breeze that carried it up high over their heads, passed the seagulls and over the horizon. The rays of the sun seemed to reach down and pull the lantern up higher. The friends imagined the lantern floating way up into the universe to hang beside the stars and shine as brightly as the moon on the clearest night.

     The rest of the friends, with doleful smiles, chanted, "For Ever, forever."

    As they six bodies that were now so full of life and magnificence sat watching the horizon change from yellow to orange to red as the lantern got lost in the sunset, Milo thought of there being an angel beyond the sun with a smile like Ever's.

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