Chapter Seven: Blind Date

Her date was Kylo Ren.

Her 'secret admirer' was Kylo Ren!

She stared, her stomach plummeting and her breath seeming to congeal in her throat. How could this have happened? How could she not have known? He had never shown any signs of...anything!

But then Rose's teasing treacherously surged to the forefront of her mind

You should be honoured. You get full sentences.

But he had made Rose cry and had been an asshole. He seemed to have no inkling of how to behave in a team. Yet he had called her in to apologise-and though he had seemed very reluctant, he had called Rose in and apologised in person. And he didn't have to, because what he had said was entirely within his remit as Managing Director and though he was cold and unfeeling, he had been right.

But he wasn't wholly unfeeling. He had watched her and noted things about her-some of which she hadn't even noticed about herself. It sent a chill down her spine that he had been observing her so closely...while she knew so little about him.

But his hand had been so warm and he had accepted her leadership and care when he burned himself. There had been something in his dark eyes as she had efficiently treated him that had seemed different. And he was talking more to her than he had in the previous eighteen months. But did she want to spend an awkward evening opposite her Boss, every sense straining and trying to second guess his moods?

Do not be afraid to take a chance and trust those who show you kindness because ultimately, what is life if not a gamble?

She blinked as Maz's words returned to her. He had been her 'secret admirer' and he had treated her to the kind of...generosity that she had never experienced before. And she was here, in a really nice restaurant on Valentine's Night on her first ever Valentine's date.

She wasn't going to give up on her meal.

Then she realised he was looking up at her, eyes hopeful and a small smile lifting his lips. And she supposed he was handsome, though not completely conventionally. His features were definite and masculine, his deep brown eyes were thoughtful and his raven hair shone in the subdued light, almost reaching his shoulders. Yet he was scarred, the brutal injury not recent yet not what you would expect in a senior executive...and his posture showed he was tense, almost nervous. There was something that made her not want to disappoint him and as she saw him start to sag, assuming the worst, she walked forward and smiled brightly, shucking off her coat and sitting opposite him.

"Mr Ren," she said as he half rose until she took her seat.

"Miss Smith," he said, his voice betraying surprise that she hadn't bolted. "Thank you for...staying." She smiled, recognising his restraint.

"I would hardly run away from a free meal," she told him as he stared at her. "Joke," she said after a beat and he visibly relaxed, running a hand through his hair in what was clearly a nervous gesture. Nervous? He managed a chagrined expression.

"I am a total amateur at this," he confessed.

"I am sure you've heard I've never done anything like this before," she admitted. "So not flush with experience myself." He looked up and nodded.

"So perhaps...we can navigate our way through this together?" he suggested. "You certainly have more experience in social situations than I do..."

"That's true, Mr Ren," she replied as he looked uncomfortable. He seemed to be internally debating.

"I think..." he began and took a sip from his glass of water. "I think it's not tradition to use formal address on a date."

"Maybe in the eighteenth century," she pointed out.

"But as it's the twenty-first, you can call me Kylo," he said in a rush.

"Rey," she smiled, finding she was enjoying seeing him so discomforted. He nodded.

"I know," he told her and then looked even more embarrassed. Then she frowned.

"Of course...all those 'Miss Rey' notes," she murmured. "You did all of that yourself?"

"I could hardly ask my PA, could I?" he retorted with a twinkle in his eyes. She chuckled at that.

"That may have ruined the surprise," she admitted dryly. "But that writing...?"

"I used to do calligraphy when I was younger," he confessed. "It comes back pretty quickly..." Then she frowned.

"Have you been watching me?' she asked him and he looked away.

"I note details," he admitted and then paused as their waiter poured out glasses of champagne and took their orders. "And this is on me. Whatever you want, Rey." Her hazel gaze flicked up.

"I can pay for myself," she replied tightly.

"But that's not really the point of asking a beautiful woman out on a date, is it?" he replied, a little more like his normal self. "Not much of a date if you're on bread rolls and tap water."

"I..."

"Rey...I know you are self-conscious about your financial position but I do nothing with the intent of hurting you," he said in a low voice. "You are a remarkable woman. An excellent assistant, determined despite the fact you haven't had the most supportive upbringing. My...Han and Leia were determined to hire you when you interviewed because they were so impressed by you."

"So why did you ask the asshole questions then?" she asked him sharply. He sipped his champagne, exhaling slowly.

"They trusted me to be their Managing Director," he said, speaking carefully. "They wanted me to fulfil that post. And they can behave with compassion and disregard for all job descriptions and niceties as owners but I can't. I have to ensure what I do is in the best interests of the company and that we hire based on ability, not sympathy. So I asked the 'asshole questions' because I wanted to know what sort of person you were." He sighed. "I never regretted you being hired. But at least accept I asked you on the date so I will pay."

She stared at the table and then nodded.

"Okay...if you answer some questions," she said brightly and he frowned.

"What sort of questions?" he asked warily. She smiled.

"I don't know anything about you-while you clearly know far too much about me," she replied tartly, sipping her champagne. She had never tasted it and decided she liked it. She took a second sip. "So tell me about Kylo Ren."

She watched him draw in on himself, his shoulders squaring and posture stiffening and in that second, she realised he wasn't going to tell her much. The familiar mask was back in place and she mourned the loss of the shy smile that had warmed his face, revealed a hint of...dimples?

"Hux said that you had some...difficult times in the past but wouldn't say any more," she continued as he inspected her. "Look, I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable but I would like to know more about the man who claimed to be my secret admirer." He nodded.

"At least he had that much discretion," he grumbled. "He's right. I...was a difficult child." He looked up challengingly.

"What? I didn't say anything!" she protested and then smiled. "But I could say that as an adult..."

"I am still difficult," he admitted. "I was sent away to school. The school didn't have much in the way of holidays...my parents were permitted to visit on ten days every year. They didn't make all of them. So I grew angrier and more filled with resentment and in the end, I ran away. I took a few jobs, drifting...and then..."

"You ended up in the no-cakes company," she guessed. He nodded, draining his glass and gratefully watching the waiter refill it.

"It...wasn't a good time. I wasn't in a good place and I wasn't the person you see today. Eventually, I came to my senses and approached my parents. We reconciled...superficially. We're still working on rebuilding our relationship..."

"And Hux? How long have you known him?" Rey asked directly.

"Three years-since I started here," he admitted.

"Okay-so what's he like?" she asked as their appetisers arrived. Kylo stared at her, wondering why she was asking. Rey rolled her eyes. "Look, Rose is my best friend and I need to know if he's going to be an asshole to her or if he's genuine."

"He's genuinely been agonising about asking her out for a year until we pushed him to ask," Kylo explained. "For the record, he's not a bad guy. A bit smug and supercilious but he's a good friend and I can imagine he'll be a caring and diligent boyfriend."

"And how can you be sure?" Rey asked before she could stop herself, her eyes narrowed. There was the trace there of the girl who had largely needed to fend for herself and was prepared to do what was necessary to protect herself. He shrugged.

"Despite everything, he's friends with me," he explained and she suddenly smiled. Blushing, she sipped her champagne and heard the edge to his voice again, suddenly wondering why he hated himself so much and knowing that he wouldn't get any sort of a straight answer out of him. So she toyed with her glass.

"You know, I've never had champagne before," she said. He blinked: his own upbringing had been privileged-that he acknowledged-and he had tasted champagne when he had filched some from his mother's glass. A small smile tilted his lips.

"I first had it when I was child," he revealed, picking his words carefully. "My mother was from a blue-blooded family and she went to a lot of galas and parties. Often I was dragged along as her son and heir. My father hated the whole society thing though he rather enjoyed the unlimited drinks. I stole my mother's glass of champagne cocktail and swigged the lot-it looked a lot like lemonade. She was furious when she realised what I had done and I got a lecture on being irresponsible and showing her up in public-and then I was grounded for a month. I was nine." He tried to keep the bitterness from his voice...but then he smiled. "Dad bought me a book I had been saving for because he couldn't persuade Mom to budge to try to stop me from feeling so upset. But even so, I missed my best friend's birthday party and he stopped being my friend because of that."

"I'm sorry," she murmured, accepting a top up by their waiter. "My last foster parent was an alcoholic and when I was finally taken back into the system, I swore I would never drink...though I soon realised that was a stupid thing to promise. So I amended my vow and swore I would never go out with someone who was a drunk and would always ensure I never drank so I wasn't unsafe."

"Wise precautions," he murmured, seeing her brow crinkle with consideration, scanning his words for sarcasm.

"Are you making fun of me?" she asked him quietly but he shook his head.

"No-I have seen what too much alcohol can do," he murmured. He opened his mouth but the waiters cleared away their plates and arrived with their entrees. He stared, for Rey had ordered a 'surf and turf' of a large well done aged steak and a half lobster with extra fries and vegetables. He scanned her slim shape and frowned. "Are you actually going to eat that?" he asked and she grinned.

"You may have seen my lunch in the fridge but you haven't seen my snacks," she told him. "Poe and Finn think I'm a bottomless pit because I out-ate them at a pie-eating contest in 'the Ordinary Pie Factory' by the river. In fact, my photo is on the wall there as a champion!" He suddenly laughed, an unexpected sound that shocked her because she had never heard it before.

"Oh Maker-I've been stung," he chuckled. "Should I ring my bank for the mortgage now or when the check arrives?" She laughed as well. "So do you do anything for recreation or do you spend all your time eating pies?" She smiled.

"I work on my course-which you already knew," she pointed out and he nodded, carving his own steak. "I see my friends-we have movie nights between our homes. I run at weekends and go indoor wall climbing. I enjoy going to free art galleries and catching performances by musicians and bands in the park. But mostly I enjoy spending time with people I care for and sharing my life."

"Because you didn't have someone constant to share your life with until now," he murmured and she nodded, shovelling lobster into her mouth. She groaned.

"Have you tried this?" she asked him, chewing and grinning. "This is amazing!" He chuckled, that warm feeling in his chest once more at seeing her genuinely overjoyed at a new experience. He nodded but she offered him a chunk and self-consciously, he accepted, savouring the flavour.

"Good lobster," he acknowledged as she nodded and continued her attack on the food.

"So what do you do when you're not running the company and refusing cake?" she asked him, her tact level lowered by the champagne. He paused and sipped his own drink.

"I run and work out," he admitted, gesturing to himself vaguely. Her eyes swept over his broad shoulders and his evidently built shape and she nodded appreciatively.

"I can see," she commented and then she blushed. "Oh my god, I am so sorry..." He chuckled.

"I can hardly take offence at a statement of fact," he told her in a teasing tone. She looked at him again, seeing his pale skin dotted with a few dark moles, his eyes glittering with amusement and his broad shoulders shaking with laughter at her discomposure. She chewed her steak furiously and then swallowed.

"How did you know about the book?" she asked him quietly. He noted that she couldn't meet her eye and he wiped his mouth with his napkin to buy himself time.

"Your friends are less than discreet," he admitted, "but that only gave me the clue as to what to buy. The truth is that I have watched you since you started-determined, brave, hard-working and absolutely driven to complete your course. You picked up your job very quickly for someone who was a novice when she started and you never need to be told anything twice. And knowing that you were lacking a book so essential for your course, I felt that this would be a gift with meaning that would help you succeed and that you could look back on with fondness in your office as an engineer."

She stared at him and she smiled.

"That is so kind-thank you," she said softly. "Can-can I ask? Do-do you go out much?" His brows arched in surprise. "You work late and are in early and don't seem to be...much of a party-goer..."

"If you wanted to say asshole, I wouldn't be offended since that's the truth as well," he sighed. "No. My social life is very limited. Not even Hux has seen my apartment...or my parents..." Her eyes widened.

"What are they like?" she asked and he narrowed his eyes then.

"That's...personal..." he told her a little more coolly. She started.

"Sorry," she said genuinely. "It's just...I've never had any. So I always ask anyone I know about theirs...I guess it's trying to vicariously work out what having a family should be like."

"Sometimes, I wished I didn't have a family," he confessed, feeling curiously ashamed at the words in the face of someone who had always longed for the love and acceptance of family. Her eyes widened so he felt the explanation rushing over his lips, before he could bottle it away. "As I said, I was a difficult child, filled with anger and bitterness. I lashed out more than I should and hated being corrected. My family loved me-of that I have no doubt-but they were very busy with their careers and they decided I needed to be sent away to school to try to sort out my issues. I felt I was being just excluded from the family-a feeling reinforced by the lack of letters and infrequent visits. In the end I concluded they no longer wanted me as a son...so when things got unbearable at the school, I ran away, though I had no clue where I was going. Just not home-because I didn't believe I had a home with them any more, that they would just send me away again. I made some bad choices and ended up...in real trouble with no way to ever get out. In desperation, I reached out to my Uncle and he...helped me."

There was shame in his last words and he started as he felt her hand gently wrap around his much larger one, her grasp gentle and reassuring.

"I am sorry," she said genuinely. "That must have been hard." He managed a wan smile that never reached his eyes.

"It was my own fault...I could have contacted them when I ran but I thought they wouldn't want anything to do with me...not knowing they had never given up looking. There were consequences of my actions but they helped me pick up what pieces I could and supported me. I sometimes go and see them. Holidays, that sort of thing." She nodded but that wistful look was there again.

"Never had a good holiday when I was in the system and since...well, I have friends and we sort of spend holidays together," she revealed. "They seem so relaxed when they talk about families...but I just can't offer anything because I have nothing."

"You have friends who clearly care about you," he told her. "You will find someone who loves you as much as you deserve. And you will find and build your family, Rey-of that I have no doubt."

"And I hope one day you will feel more able to let your family in," she suggested as he smiled and offered her a hand as their entrees were cleared away. They ordered coffees.

"Deal?" he asked.

"Deal," she said, shaking his hand with a laugh. "This is not how I imagined this would work out..." He nodded.

"Me neither," he confessed, his eyes twinkling. "Maker, I am glad Hux made me that wager..."

She froze and stared at him.

"What wager?" she asked him, her tone suddenly icy. "You mean you asked me out as a BET?" She sat upright stiffly, her face angry. He felt suddenly wretched.

"I-it's not what you think!" he told her. "Hux bet that I wouldn't ask you out because..."

"Because I'm the only sad unattached female in the office and you don't have a social life or a family you can talk to properly!" she spat back. Treacherously, his temper flared as well.

"You could have walked out when you saw it was me," he challenged her. Her eyes flared with hurt, the hazel flecked with green snapping away.

"Fine!" she spat, grabbing her coat and purse. "Congratulations. You won your bet." And then she rose and stormed for the door.