Switching off the light I sat on the bed. Tapping on the screen of my phone, I realized it was already mid night. The silver lightning brightened up my room entering through my opened windows. The moon indeed was a full moon.

I rolled my eyes to have a good view of the familiar room I was sitting in but those countless thoughts still dominated my mind for which I was suffering since last week.

I looked at the pillow and on the very next moment I put my head on it. With a heavy breathe I took a fetal position lying on bed by curling up on one side with the knees bent. Pulling the bolster near me, I placed it between my knees to relieve pressure from my hips.

I didn't wanted to do the same things that I was continuously doing these days. There was not much difference but I only hoped that next day would be a little better.

My eyes burned when I tried hard to open it. The room looked brighter now and the very next moment I realized it was morning already.

Again another night passed by while I didn't SLEEP at all.....

"Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain." I read those sentences yesterday from a book which I found inside the old rags placed with the clothes of my grandmother.

She was an exorcist by profession and had performed numerous religious and spiritual practices of evicting demons, jinns and other spiritual entities. She was renowned in the village. Apart from this, she was the only guardian of mine. After my parents death, she was the one and only world for me. (If you have already realized that I am using the word 'was' for my grandmother, is so because she died last month while performing a ritual. Her death still remained a mystery though.)

I was disturbed by some thoughts and my mind was always full of rubbish thoughts these days after her demise. My friends called me numerous times to return to the city where I worked as a part timer since last two years. I came here to bid the last farewell to her a few weeks ago but got carried away by some unknown lingering feelings that made me stay in this house.

The bed we shared together , the books she read , her clothes and shoes, her personal tools, all  binded me with her immortal thoughts. Now the kitchen seemed too quiet and unusual without her. I could not close my eyes as I could feel her presence near me. I had goosebumbs every time I sensed her presence near me. It might be my lingering emotions that I felt like that or maybe she....she....wanted to say something???

These were all the thoughts that were running on my mind since last few weeks and for which I had sleepless nights. But now I am clueless as well as helpless. I am kind of pissed off now. I know I have to move on and go back to my usual routine. I want to do so but something stops me.

Oh yes!! How can I forget this?? Not long ago I found a photo of a young girl inside the rags that belonged to my grandmother. When I turned the photograph, I saw something written on it, 'Royang should marry Amy.'

What??? Why the hell is my name mentioned???And why would I marry her??? By the way, who is she?? And how come grandmother never mentioned about her before?? Is it related to her death mystery?? To know all these answers, I must first find this photo girl.

But...umm...it doesn't matter how many times I go through the photo, I am clueless about her? I decided to enquire about this to a friend of my grandmother who was also an exorcist and she used to help my grandmother in performing her rituals.

When I showed her the photo and those words, she not only told me who the girl was but also took me to see her house from outside. The girl named Amy was in my age group and she lived with her parents. I had blurred images of the girl who looked quite a beauty. Their house looked shabby and cheap. I stayed there no more and left from the scene.

I remember that friend of my grandmother who said that I must do the work allotted for me soon or else I must be ready to face the consequence. Apart from that she also gave a shock to me by saying that her father was the reason for the death of my parents for which he suffered in jail for 20 years.

Now after learning that the truck driver that hit my parents who were crossing the road was her father, how could I initiate a talk to that scum family??What did grandmother think before taking such an over-the-top decision???

I am totally confused about what grandmother thought, but at the same time I trust her.

To my surprise, Amys family was already informed about the marriage and they showed no denial to it. In the morning as the sun came out, I opened my burning eyes and pushed myself from the bed. Endure it. You must do what she wanted me to do., I said to myself.

I was asked to go to Amys house at about 10. And I being the punctual kid, arrived at about 9 infront of their house. The house that I saw the other day was completely different from today. It was well decorated with marigolds and some other wild flowers.

Before entering, I made a call to my friend who lives in another city. Hey! Royang here. Is everything ready? Yes yes. Dont worry about all these. Ill reach the bus stop by evening. Just send me the ticket and your address.

As I entered from the main gate, I saw Amy in her shinny sari which was probably brought for todays occasion. She smiled at me shyly like a typical bride and ran inside a room. I stood there pretending not to see her.

From somewhere her parents came and hugged me. They gave their blessings. Son! We are very fortunate to have a son-in-law like you, the father said. We have already prepared the things and we can start now., her mother said. And in between all these, I rolled my eyes and thought, O God!! Too much of drama. I need to finish this rubbish and get myself out of this shit.

My grandmothers friend came and she was going to perform some rituals before our marriage ceremony. Although I was reluctant to do so, but there were no choices left.

I sat there voicelessly. My eyes were fixed at the clock. I was asked to sit on a chair and next to me sat Amy. Her face was hiding inside the veil of her sari but through her voice it seemed that she was sobbing. That time I realized that it was indeed a real marriage thing.

After an hour or so, Amy and I was asked to have food from the same plate. It was the last ritual as was said by her parents. I looked at the well-decorated plate which had rice and dal along with other side dishes. I needed to complete it as soon as possible and so I hurriedly took a bite of rice and gestured her to eat the food too. But her hands looked pale and she wasnt willing to cooperate.

I was very clear that I needed to complete this task. I decided to put on a concerning husbands act. I put a spoonfull of rice near her mouth and said, Hurry up.

She calmly took and chew it. I stood up and called her parents, Mom, Dad! I guess we need to hurry up. It will be dark soon.

Amy starts to sob and her mother hugged her. Tears rolled their eyes. Her father said, Son-in-law! She is my pride. She is my only valuable jewel. I want you to forget the past and try to lead a better future with her. She might not be a perfect housewife material but she can learn well. Dont make her cry. This is the only thing we can ask you.

This time Amys sob turned into a loud cry. She hugged her father and cried loudly.

What did her father say?? Forget the past??? Dont make her cry??Huh!!

We both bid farewell to her family as well to my grandmothers friend. She slipped a paper on my shirts pocket asked me to read it later on.

We rode a taxi to the bus stop as I planned. I asked her to sit near the counter and went to the mens washroom as I planned. I changed my clothes there as I planned. And I secretly went and sat on the bus as I planned.

I peeped through the window to see her. She was still waiting there for me. Foolish woman!!! I could see her sob a little. She frequently entangled her fingers and rub her hands. Maybe she was feeling cold. Indeed it was a chilly evening.

The bus slowly started to move. At once my heart skipped a beat as if something I left behind. I was pretty sure of what I was doing and what that family did to me and maybe grandmother too wanted a revenge like this.

By the time these thoughts were running on my mind, the bus left the stop and I was in the highway. Within a fraction of second I suddenly remembered about poor Amy. What if someone tried to take advantage of her at night? Will she be so dumb to stay there all night?? She might get through my intentions and head home by now.

Dusting off those thoughts I tried to sleep. All these days I had more than enough sleepless nights. Maybe this time I might be able to fall asleep. I closed my eyes to get a sleep when I remembered something. That friend of my grandmother had slipped a piece of paper inside my shirts pocket.

I reached out my hand aimlessly inside my pocket and took the thin sheet of paper. I opened it and read it.

It read Royang, I know you will be clueless about the things happening near you but Ill tell you what you need to know. And I also know that I wont be there with you during your marriage, so I have asked my friend to do so.

As you might have known by this time about the direct link of your parents death and Amys family, you must know what I have prepared for you. I have no other ulterior motive with them other than taking a revenge. Yes a revenge.

As a mother it is very painful that I have seen my child and her wife being crashed under a truck and I could do nothing. I just want to give them the taste of their own medicine. I wanted them to feel the same pain that I had to go through.

It was Gods wish that you were born in such a time of ill-omen. It is written in your forehead that you have mangala dosha and marriage between a manglik and non-manglik is disastrous. And yes dear, you are a maanglik.

I have raised you until you reach your age of marriage so that I can use you as a bait.

Since you have got to know about your identity, I guess you have already done my assigned work.

My lips and throat was dried up. I had goosbumps run under my spine. My hands were shaking and so were my eyes. I found my eyes were watery and my heart was paining.

She had finally cleared me out about her intentions but I became more unclear. I was unclear about her reasoning. I was unclear about her thoughts regarding me.

I felt betrayed. I felt hurt. I felt cheated....cheated by my loved ones. I still couldnt believe if it was real or not.

Earlier I was unhappy and afraid what might happen to Amy after I left, but now the tables have turned. I am afraid what is going to happen next to me??

I can neither return back to Amy nor erase our marriage. I can do nothing. The comfortable bus now looked creepy. And the highway looked dreary. There is a strong uncontrollable and unpleasant emotion of feeling going on inside me called FEAR. Maybe this is my karma for what I have done........