"Reagan, you really have to reconsider—" Darrell began as soon as I left the bathroom, but I interrupted.

"I don't reconsider anything. I make up my mind, and that's it."

There were times when I missed what I left behind, and occasionally I wished that I didn't have to make tough decisions, but at the end of the day, my decisions were my decisions, and I stood by them, even if Logan was suddenly acting a little weird.

"You're supposed to be much smarter than this, but I guess I was wrong about that. You can't think more than one step ahead," Darrell continued.

"Smarter than what? What have I done that's even remotely stupid? Fell in love?" I asked.

Logan peered out of the bathroom door behind me and surprised me with a whisper. "Tell him he's fucking stupid. Tell him his genes will die with him. You're doing great, but you need to go for the jugular now. Not sure if it's just me, but predator instincts are kicking in."

I turned around. "It's definitely just you, but thank you for the encouragement."

He smiled. "I love you. Kick his ass, Rea."

I smiled too. Even if something wasn't quite right between us, he still cared enough to feed me a few lines.

"Your genes are going to die with you," I said as I turned back to Darrell. "Especially with your pathetic, pissy way of going about life."

"Too much. You ruined it," Logan whispered.

I turned back around. "I just can't do anything right, can I?"

"No, you cannot," Darrell said.

"Just leave her alone, Darrell. Let her live, for fuck's sake," Logan said.

"This doesn't have anything to do with you, so I would strongly suggest that you take your nose back where it belongs and stay out of this," Darrell said.

"You're not fucking serious right now. I'm the other half of the guilty party here," Logan said.

I covered my ears with my hands. I wasn't any good at socializing, but I wasn't dumb when it came to cause and effect. I knew that this would happen, even when everyone else seemed to think that I was paranoid, and I just wanted to be left alone for once.

Darrell was stubborn, and for some reason, he needed to be included in everything that didn't concern him, but there was nothing I could do about his ridiculous personality. I could only control myself.

"I wanted to celebrate something with you guys, and I thought that we could have a fun night where we could pretend that everything was completely normal, but it's ruined now. And I'm pissed. I'm not even going to hide it." I headed for the front door. "Why can't anyone just let me be happy with myself for once? It's like we have to keep any sort of positivity locked up in a treasure chest on the ocean floor, and I hate it."

I was certain that there were other words exchanged, but I didn't listen to them as I shut the door behind me.

Instead of climbing up to the seal watchtower, I chose I different spot to collect my thoughts. If I had remembered correctly, right where the water reached the rocks during high tide was where Racecar the seal had washed up, lifeless. For some reason, though his body wasn't there anymore, it seemed like the most comforting option for me. A tad dark, yes, but I wasn't in a particularly happy mood.

The trace amounts of blood had also washed away, or I was in the wrong spot. Either way, the rocks were a little wet from the tide rolling back out to sea, and the rockweed cushioned the surface underneath me. I stretched my legs out across the slimy surface, but I didn't mind it at all. Nature wasn't always glamorous, and that was how I liked to live.

I didn't know why I thought human relationships would be any better than the rest of nature, but maybe it was that we expected more from ourselves. Some claimed humans were the pinnacle of evolution, but anyone with a respect for the planet knew otherwise. We were intelligent and sophisticated, but we weren't smart.

Overhead, a menacing wall of clouds snuck its way closer to Paradise City across the sky. Soon enough, it'd rain, but I didn't plan on heading back inside anytime soon. Water rejuvenated life, and I wasn't an exception to that.

"Rea."

I looked over my sunburnt shoulder, even though I didn't need to. There was only one person who called me that, and I had his voice memorized anyway.

"It's gonna start raining soon. It was too sunny and warm today, so the Paradise City gods think we've had it too good."

I shook my head. "I just want to stay here for a while."

Logan sat next to me, and the slippery weeds seemed to bother him more than they bothered me. He wiped the slime onto his pants.

"You know, ever since we've met, we've been forced to spend a lot of time together," he said.

"Not really. We weren't forced to do anything. We did it because it felt good. It felt good to finally find a person who doesn't make us feel so lonely."

"I've never felt farther away from you than I do right now."

I frowned. "Well, I'm really good at doing that to people, so I don't know what to tell you."

There wasn't much I could say, so I held out my foot in his general direction.

He rose an eyebrow at me.

"I'm burnt everywhere else, so you can hold my ankle. Maybe that'll help," I said.

He grabbed hold of my leg. "Yeah, I guess this is a little better."

His hands were a little cold, but I didn't mind.

"Wait until I tell all my friends about you. They're going to be jealous that I managed to get such a hoe," he said.

I let myself smile. "You better not tell them that."

"Don't worry, I don't have any friends. You're the only person dumb enough to like me."

"What about Morgan?"

"I don't think there's a correct answer to that, especially when your foot is this close to my junk."

I laughed, and my shoulders relaxed. I didn't even realize I was tense. "You know I would never hurt you."

He smiled for a moment, then it disappeared. "You're not actually going to take the job, right? There are a thousand other things you could do, and I just figured there has to be one that's a little closer," he hesitated, "to me."

Oh, that made sense. I guess that could potentially be hurtful.

"I, uh, well, I wanted to," I said.

Of course, it didn't start until the next summer, so he didn't need to know that I pretty much already claimed it.

He and I spent months together practically non-stop, and then we were just supposed to carry on with our lives like we used to. It was a backward approach, but I enjoyed every moment, even this one.

"I don't know, I guess I just thought that once we get off of this island, nothing would change. It's not possible, and I know that, but still," he said.

"We still have another year of school, Logan. Things are going to change a lot within the next year," I replied.

"And there must be a part of me that's a little bit afraid that I'm just going to end up in your graveyard of forgotten people. I'm not trying to be an ass, but—"

"Logan," I interrupted. Those words stung, but they were true. "I've grown up a little in three years. I've figured out that I can have people who love me and do what I love. It's shitty to use the rocks in your life as stepping stones to get to the next goal in life."

He paused. "Yeah, it sounded stupid as soon as I said it."

It wasn't stupid, though. A snide remark to cover up his real feelings would have been stupid.

"I don't know where we'll be when we get off this island, but I've learned as long as you have a respect for the future and remember where you came from, the only way to be actually happy is to live now. You can't cling to the past just because it makes the future a little more secure," I said.

He looked at me for a moment but didn't say anything.

"I mean, you've done it once this summer. You took a chance with me," I said. "And anyway, there's still plenty of time until we graduate. Like I said, things will change. We won't."

"You're probably right. We should just spend this time celebrating your accomplishments and brilliance in such a shitty world," Logan said.

He let go of my ankle and leaned in to kiss me, but I pulled away.

"I actually had ice cream cake in mind for celebrating," I said.

"Ice cream cake?" He shook his head. "We're in the middle of the ocean right now."

"But I want ice cream cake. From Dairy Queen." When Logan shook his head again, I smiled. "Just call Uber Eats."

"Rea, you don't call Uber Eats. That's—that's not how it works," Logan said.

"Oh," I said. "Then how does it work?"

"You really expect me to believe that you survived by yourself for three years?" He laughed.

"My Google search history is filled with stupid questions." I laughed too. "What is a taxes? Are eggs bad for you? But don't pretend that you're not stupid too, because I know you are."

The rain began to fall, and I looked up at the sky.

"You're such a damn know-it-all, Rea. It's true, though. The smartest thing I've ever done is letting myself get close to you."

I smiled and rolled my eyes. "You didn't let yourself. Don't lie. You didn't have a choice."

"Oh, I had a choice. Then I watched you with the whales, and suddenly that choice was made for me," he said.

The drizzle steadily increased, and the drops beaded on my red skin. There were times (most times, in fact) that Logan said the opposite of what he meant to keep me away, but it never really worked. And it was always odd when he didn't seem so scared to let me in, but it was a good strange. Maybe I could do something right after all.

Just like the ocean, he was filled with a secret depth that I'd never understand unless I did some prodding. But I always liked a little mystery and uncertainty. It was rejuvenating, and even when difficulty arose, it was a thousand times better than being cooped up away from everything and everyone else.

Neither one of us said anything for a while, but we didn't really need to. We watched the ocean, the seals and the birds, and the rain, and even though we hadn't settled anything, the water eased the uncertainty of the future.

"This is just as relaxing as I hoped it would be. Sometimes it feels good to hear the ocean say that everything's gonna be okay," Logan said.

I looked over at him. "You hear it too?"

"Yeah. The ocean also says you're a nerd."

I laughed. "The ocean is never wrong."

And it was true. The ocean was never wrong. It led me down a path of happiness, with whales and courage and kisses, and although it wasn't a country road, it took me home to the place I belonged. Paradise City.

No matter the cost, Logan wouldn't be left behind in a graveyard of forgotten people. And I was going to chase whales through the ocean. If I could have both my family and my passion, then I'd find a way to make it all work.

Logan always told me I was good at finding easy solutions to problems. I'd just have to work a little harder on this one.

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Hello everyone! Thank you so much for reading! There are only a few more chapters to go, and honestly, I have no idea what I'm doing anymore. I guess that's not any different than how I normally feel, but I've been working on this book for a while now, and it feels weird that it eventually has to end.

Overall, this book has been a bit of a pain. It hasn't come naturally, and I feel like it really shows. But I'd rather have a first draft that needs some work than nothing at all. There's a lot that I like about this book, but as you all know, I like to dwell on all the stuff I hate about it. If you have any suggestions at all, I'd love to hear them, either for the previous chapters or future ones.

Also, I finally published my new book, so I don't have to ask you guys anything else about it now! Yay! Did you see how subtly I advertised that? Wow, I'm clever.