Tae was in a bad mood for the whole day. And I mean that's something you don't see every day.

He didn't talk when he didn't had to, he didn't let me use his markers (boy is it my fault that you're on your period?) and didn't ate up his beloved cantene food.

My genius ass managed to connect this with the fact that he needed to sleep at my place so badly. And I began to worry about my only real friend a bit.

But I only was about to be more worried.

For this we'll have to skip to the moment Tae knocked on my door.

___

He was a bit late, but did I really expect a person like Tae to be in time?

The problem was, while he was on his way it started to pour like shit and he was completely drowned.

"Hey" he huffed out with a sheepish smile. His pink-white striped sweater was almost see-through and his dungarees clung to his legs like a second skin and he all in all looked really uncomfortable.

"Geez come in, you look like you took a shower with your clothes on."

He nodded and came in hurriedly, taking off his Converse together with his soaked socks.

My dad came in in that moment and a wide smile spread over his face, making him look lile a five years old on Christmas.

"Heyy! Taehyung right? My daughter didn't tell me that she has such a pretty friend, what hair die do you use? Here let me take your bag I'll bring it upstairs, have fun you two!"

And with that he snatched Taehyung's bag and hopped out of the room.

Oh dear

Let me tell you, I never found my dad embarrassing until that very moment.

Taehyung stared at the point my dad had stood before as if he just saw a ghost not really comprehending what just happened, "He is so nice. Is he gay?"

"No", I said while patting his shoulder, "But someone has to play mom for me, no? And now go take a shower you fish."

Our house is decently big with two floors, but since it's just me and my dad I have pretty much the whole upper level for myself.

Now, call me dumb but because I was so used to being the only one ever using the bathroom I just walked in, completely forgetting that I had a guest showering in there.

He wasn't completely naked, already wearing his pants but still his upper body was all naked and his face showed off an expression of shock I would today describe as hilarous.

"Oh fuck, I'm sorry!" I said, immediately shutting the door.

But I guess it's true what they say. The seen can't be unseen.

He didn't look at me when he walked out, neither did he say anything.

I just watched him as he brushed his fingers through his wet locks and couldn't help but to think how it all made sense.

Why he never wore short sleeved clothes.

Why he had this habit of playing with his sleeves.

But what made him cut himself?

There were so many of them. Fresh cuts and almost faded scars, tracing his arms in a symetric pattern.

The picture had burnt itself in my brain and I suddenly had only one thought engulfing my mind.

Make him stop

I didn't want this cheery, wonderful boy to suffer like this.

He doesn't have to be alone with this; alone.

I kept watching him and felt so incredibly powerless. Knowing that I couldn't do anything to help him.

Not like this

I wasn't familiar with that feeling. The feeling of wanting to protect a person so badly. But how could I, a tiny weak girl, help him? This felt so... huge.

"Hey Tae." I said softly, "Let's go down. Dad made Pasta and let me tell you - you'll never taste something more delicious."

He smiled and nodded.

He didn't spoke throughout the meal and I felt like crying for destroying the mood because I was too dumb to just stay out of the damn bathroom.

"You know, I never ate something home made before. It's delicious." Tae stated rather quietly.

"Oh, I'm glad you liked it. But doesn't your mom cook?" Dad asked.

A painful expression appeared on his face that was quickly hidden by a neutral one, "No, she doesn't like it."

"Oh, I see." Dad said, beginning to clear the table.

"Let's go upstairs 'kay?" I suggested and Tae complied, standing up and straightening his clothes.

It was so awkward all of a sudden and I hated it. It had been never awkward between us.

Dumb, dumb Y/N. You just had to ruin your only friendship like this, hadn't you?

He entered the room first but didn't turn on the light, so I also left it turned off, not really taking note of it.

So we stood there in my dark room, not saying a word while it was pouring outside like it was the end of the world.

"You would also do it if you were in my place."

"Maybe." I said honestly, understand what he meant by 'it'.

I didn't say anything else, just waiting for him to keep talking. I didn't want him to feel forced to open up.

"You know, it's not that Catherine doesn't like cooking. She simply doesn't want to cook for me."

"Catherine?"

"My..."

He paused, but I couldn't see his expression in the moment, only able to make up his pink locks in the darkness.

"My adoptive mom."

"Why don't you call her mom?"

He was very quiet for a very long time. It was this heavy quietness that manages to make you a nervous wreck.

"She doesn't deserve to be called that." His voice was a mixture of anger and sadness.

"Tae? Why did you have to oversleep at my place?"

I hadn't meant to ask this out loud but the question had ghosted around my head for so long now, I needed to know.

"Rejun came back from his buisness trip toady."

"Your adoptive dad?"

He scoffed, "Yeah, that's one way to call him."

Again this nerve wrecking quietness.

"Tae?"

"Hm?"

"You're not alone with this anymore okay?"

___

Did I make you curious or sad or both?

xx