Planes and Time

If we look hard enough, we'll see that we are all naked.

Naked like the cold press of Mother nature's wintery lips shivering on the bare trees.

Naked like a phosphorescent glow in the low midnight fog.

We can feel the fiery tempest of a maelstrom taking us down, as we rise up like the orange burst of the sun.

We feel.

Yet we are trying so hard, to be numb...

                       (Jacob's point of view)

We tiptoed around the burning rose, watching the slow crackles of beauty defuse. While the hunger raged in our eyes; beast.

Anna's words were still ringing in my ear, like a trail of cocaine residue,

"you make me happy."

"you make me happy."

"you make me happy"

I held her fragility between the stars and the space bounded by her movements; interstellar.

I watched her ember eyes glow and burn out with the whistling melodies of the song.

Then

We

Slowed

Down.

To catch up with the tempo of the music like Feather Pink Grass gliding under the cape of the wind.

Sweet, wonderfully paced, and gentle.

I'm watching Anna now, while the world quietly fades behind us. I squeeze her hand as she gently rests on my shoulder. The music courses through my veins and I feel the heights of its candor, moving like static. Each soft caress of her soft skin burns with an unexplainable magic, somewhere between fantasy and what we already have.

Her lips pucker like pillars of life, and I wish for nothing but to breathe her in. Anna trembles in my embrace, molding into the shakey settles of time. I watch her chest fall and then rise, it reminds me of the strong-winged strokes of a butterfly. Black, and orange; we imbue.

It's not just that were dancing.

It's about time.

Time has always been cheated by our fears, yet it is a passage.

A tunnel channeling our future and past selves. Time is a grand marker of something we wish would always be linear.

Time is a god that marvels at the world with indifference. It allows life to proceed despite our desires. It is a shapeless constant quantity of motion measured for man's sanity.

Time is but a shadow, it slips away.

Time is also my friend. It stretches slowly breaking atoms into nanoseconds so I could enjoy this precious moment with Anna.

"I need a drink!" Anna whispers, her arms dropped down to her side. My neck shivers from the absence of her warmth.

I nod, wishing that time could rewind and let us be close again.

A brisk cold wind picks up, and Anna shivers as we look up at the dense dark clouds appearing in the sky. That was the one thing about our quiet little town, the July storms in an October sky.

"Stupid unpredictable weather!" Anna grumbled as she quickly navigated through a cluster of people, heading straight to the bar.

I followed behind her, still recovering from whiplash. The cold brute outcast of her love and hatred, like holy angels, falling; thrown off by the imbalance of love. Just when I thought there was something behind the guarded walls of her heart, she shuts me out ruthlessly.

"Ss-should- www-we-we dd-dddr-ink?" I ask quickly, trying to reserve judgment.

Anna checks her invisible watch on her wrist, "Yeah, it's like 3ish in the afternoon" she shrugs, clearly making up a time.

I shook my head, she misunderstood me. "Nnn-nn-no I--I- mmmm-mmm-mmm-mean, dri-drinking- ing-ing won't m-mm-make you- h--happy" I tried to explain.

Alcohol is a suppressant, it may help you forget, but it will never take away what you truly feel. Sometimes, it made things worse.

Anna squinted, wrinkling her nose, "Listen, I've been tolerating you all day, and you're starting to bother me. I'm having a drink" she said firmly.

I could hear anger and edginess in her voice as we made our way up to the open bar along the boardwalk.

I took out my wallet, "tw-tw-two dri-dr-dr-inks ppp-ppl-lease" I said to the half-asleep bartender.

Anna gave me a look of confusion as we were handed two beers.

"What are you going to drink?" she asked taking both mugs of beer for herself.

I rolled my eyes, letting out a sigh.

I watched in amazement as she chucked them both down in about five minutes. She wiped her mouth with her hair, "Keep them coming" she bellowed.

"Sss-ss-ll-low dow-dow-down" I hissed, concerned that she might choke.

Anna pushed me away, already slurring her words, "No you fucking slow down, retard!" she snapped.

She was volatile I could see it in her eyes, as grey dismal storm clouds seeped into her drunkness.

Anna swayed talking to herself, "I hate this weather" she rambled.

Then a fresh imprint of tears started to form around her eyelids. I knew she was fighting ghost I couldn't see.

I tried to hold her still. Life is rickety. It's harsh and unfair. We just have to do our best not to fall off.

"Stop!" she squealed, between sobs.

Anna banged her fist on the table, crying, "just let me drown..." she whispered taking another swig of her fourth drink.

I just met her today, and nothing could have prepared me for this.

Anna ticked, slowly on, each minute was agony. The dark of veil of her eyelashes couldn't hide the pain. Whatever, she was going through it had nothing to do with the present. Time had whisked her back, to her suffering letting her drink her sadness.

I watched her body sway dangerously on the stool she was sitting on, "le-let mm-me h-h-h-help y-yyou" I stuttered quickly, as I tried to support her back.

Curious faces turned to glance at us. It was a little past noon and Anna was having a drunk emotional meltdown, so of course, people were noticing.

Anna kicked and screamed, her mascara bleeds down her patchy red eyes, as she howled like a  banshee. All of her turmoil spilled out like she was seeing phantoms and monsters.I held her down so that she wouldn't hit her head, as she screamed curled up into a tight, small, ball.

"Let me go!" she sobbed yanking on my shirt, trying to rip it. Her movements were defensive like an animal trapped in a cage, she withered and cringe in her blind rage.

"I--I--I- ca-can't" I whispered helplessly, brushing the bangs out of her ghostly white face.

"Do we have a problem? Are you taking advantage of a clearly intoxicated woman?" an angry bystander asked.

My heart raced, as I looked at the situation. Anna was half naked only wearing a bra, I was standing behind her, holding her down, and she was drunk out of her mind.

"He won't leave me alone!" Anna hiccuped turning over to throw up.

"N-nnnn-nnn-no" I stuttered.

The man shook his head in disgust, "well you certainly sound guilty. How low of a life can you be to try to force yourself onto a woman in broad daylight?!" his voice boomed.

I looked around and saw angry faces, and it reminded me of high school all over again. The shame, the ridicule and how people are blinded by what they want to see.

My fist curled in frustration, "I--I--m h-ee--eel-pping!" I tried to explain.

I could feel myself shaking, each word blasted into shards of hurt and confusion as my temperature rose.

Anna groaned, "I don't even know him" she mumbled pointing a wobbly finger at me.

The man stepped between us, he was twice my size and his tattoos told me he was part of a biker gang, "You can't even lie straight" he spat, "Leave now, or the police won't know where to start looking for your bones" he growled, cracking his knuckles.

I looked at Anna one more time begging her to stop the madness. Her eyes crossed over in a blur as she knocked over a shot glass.

I could feel my shoulders crumble in defeat as I walked away.

                                  (Anna's Point of View)

I was the washed out sky, bleeding below, letting my blood trickle like pastel colors.

I said that today I needed to feel nothing, but happiness.

Yet, sometimes pain screams the loudest in our silence.

What I didn't mention to Jacob was why...

I needed to feel this exact emotion because today was the day my mom died in a plane crash.

I remember it vividly. I was about ten years old and my family was taking our first trip to Mexico.

I had fallen asleep during the flight, only to be jolted awake by violent shaking movements worse than any earthquake.

I felt my body lift up from the seat, as a roaring screech rattled through the eerie silence. People were praying, my mom was crying, and we were rapidly descending in a downwards pivot.

I grabbed on tightly to my dad, as he put an oxygen mask over face. His hands trembled and my nose bled.

My mom looked at my frightened face, and kissed me,

"It's just turbulence,

It's just turbulence,

it's just turbulence"
she whispered over and over. Her voice was always so sweet like honey, and calm despite its raspy strain.

I saw black clouds billowing in spirals sputtering from the engine, as the wings of the plane burned through the sky. The flames left us humid and perspiring as if we were roasting in a microwave.

I was small, but I could feel each tilt and turn of the plane as it lost control, with each whizz and pop. People were screaming, and holding on to dear life, like life holds on to time (it doesn't).

There were loud noises over the intercom but as my eardrums burst. I couldn't hear them anymore, but I'm sure they sounded frantic.

My mom mouthed to me, as we all sat back secured in our seats; this time she was crying.

"mummy loves you...
it's just turbulence,
it's just turbulence"

she repeated gritting her teeth, as we shook in our skeleton.

I don't remember much after that, except for the taste of the salty red sea, the crushing of my bones, and the way my mom closed her tired eyes and just smiled as if sleep could take us back in time.

I'm probably making this last bit up, but I swear I remember floating in the riptides of unperturbed peace, knowing that she was now gilded in the sky that tore her from me.

They called my dad and me "survivors" but the worst pain started after our bodies healed, and life moved on.

The days grew thick with drought after that, as my dad and I rebuilt our lives, but I could never let go of the turbulence....

It was hard for me to look up after that, it was difficult for me to appreciate the sky when I had fallen from it and my mom had died; crushed by gravity.

Clear sunny days that turned into storms made me angry, it wasn't fair...

I watched Jacob walk away through burning eyes, swallowing the hard lump in my throat as I coughed and sobbed. I wished that my thoughts could travel ahead of me, and say, "please don't go"...

I had to hide my scars, from people. I had to pretend that I was doing fine because time had happily skipped along, fading like a painful memory.

More than anything I was afraid to be naked...to let people into my chaos.
What if they saw me for who I was really was?

Hurting.

Afraid.

A weeping willow.

Authors Note: For Amazing reads and reviews make sure to check out LaveshG profile!

Song: Misso- I run to you.

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