Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word
6th August 2021 (continued)
I spotted Hunter as soon as we neared the desk. After two years, he hadn't changed a bit. His wavy hair still dusted his shoulder and the week old stubble still covered his cleft chin.
He straightened from where he was picking things up off the floor when he saw me, placing the stuff back on the table.
"Mr Roberts, Sam will see you. Meeting room 3 is available. Can I get anyone a beverage?" Delilah looked between us, but we both declined.
We stood there awkwardly until she left.
"Thanks for agreeing to meet with me, Sam. I know you must have misgivings." Hunter tried to smile.
"Let's talk in the room," I suggested.
He nodded in agreement, his smile dropping. "Of course. Daniel?" He crouched down and picked up a small giggling child, placing him on his hip and looking back at me. "After you."
I blinked, my eyes looking between Hunter and the small child.
I headed towards the meeting room, allowing Hunter - now accompanied by a stroller - to enter first.
"Time to settle, little man." Hunter strapped the little boy back into his stroller and extracted a bottle from a baby bag that appeared to be bursting at the seam.
I watched the caring way he popped the bib on the child and handed him his bottle. An idea started spinning in my head, trying to fit in a timeline, but I didn't have too much time to think about it before Hunter turned back to me.
"I know I'm probably the last person you want to see." Hunter chuckled nervously.
"What are you doing here, Hunter?" I didn't deny what he said, though I felt sorry when I watched his shoulders slump.
"Just hear me out, Sam. I only want to apologize to you. Tori and Jaxon as well, if they let me. You don't know how much it's played on my mind what I did to you guys."
"So why not ask for all of us?"
He threw me a skeptical look. "I knew you'd at least give me a chance to explain before you threw me out."
I would have smirked, knowing that was exactly what Tori and Jaxon would have done, but I wasn't in the mood to be friendly, not when it came to the man in front of me. He'd caused me too many sleepless nights after he left.
"Why now, Hunter?" I observed him.
He spun the baby bottle top on the desk, avoiding my gaze. "Because I heard your song on the radio this week."
I stood quickly, furious. "So what, you're here now because we're finally a success."
"No, no, Sam, it's not like that." Hunter was quick to explain, but I cut him off.
"I think you should leave." I walked to the door. But Hunter remained standing by the stroller.
"Please, just let me talk. I promise you, that's not the reason I'm here."
"Your promises mean little to me now." I reminded him, not feeling an ounce of satisfaction as he winced at my words.
"Look Sam, it didn't take me long to realise how much I missed you guys. You were family, and I just left like that."
"Yeah, tossed us aside like we were trash." I expected him to defend himself, but he just hung his head.
"I was an egotistical idiot, Sam. I wanted what that manager promised me: fame, money, girls. I needed that lifestyle." He smiled sadly. "But that's a lonely life especially when my first album didn't go so well."
He sat back down when I didn't make another move to leave.
"That manager dropped me pretty quick after that. I was lucky that I'd made some friends, so that I didn't end up homeless, friends like Daniel's Mom." A look of complete joy lit up his face when looked at the boy.
"He's yours?" But Hunter was already shaking his head.
"Amelia was already pregnant when I met her, her ex ran out as soon as she realised she was expecting. She runs a little recording studio, and she needed extra help, what with Daniel and everything. She was the one that changed things for me. They both did." He mopped up the puddle of milk underneath the little boy's chin.
"For the first time I think ever, I started thinking about people other than myself. I'd been able to drown out what I'd done to you and the boys with partying and girls, but when that was gone I had nothing that could hide just what an asshole I'd been."
I snorted. "No kidding."
"I went back to the mobile home, but you'd all moved out and no one had an address for you." He explained, making my mouth drop open.
Of course we hadn't left a forwarding address, we weren't sure where we were moving to when we left. It never occurred to us that someone would come looking for us, least of all Hunter.
"We couldn't afford the rent so we moved in with Tori's family for a few weeks before we found another place to rent." I raised an eyebrow, and Hunter looked away guiltily. He was the reason that we couldn't afford the rent in the first place.
He cleared his throat. "I tried to get in contact with you but I'd deleted all your numbers and you'd blocked me on all social media."
"You could have gone to my family or Tori's or Jaxon's. They could have told you." I pointed out.
Hunter's shoulders hunched forward and he laughed in a self-deprecating way. "I was far too much of a coward for that. I was nervous that I would run into your abuela or Nanna Pat or worse Tori's mother." He shivered at the thought.
"So you heard the song, and you knew where to find us?" The pieces of the puzzle falling into place the more he talked.
"I knew it was one of yours before they announced it. I had to pull over and just listen to it. It reminded me of all those times we spent in Jaxon and Hazel's basement playing, tossing lyrics around. I knew then that I had to find you and apologize."
"But why? Why go to all this trouble to apologize?" It had been over two years. I just didn't understand.
He looked at the child jangling his keys to keep him entertained before turning back to me. "Because I'm not the same guy that walked out on you. And I never want to be him again. I've got people that need me, Sam. And what I did to you was the same thing that Amelia's ex did to her. I have to make it right so that I can put this behind me."
I was speechless. Nothing could have prepared me for this Hunter. He was right; he wasn't the same guy.
He may have looked like the Hunter I remembered, but he held himself differently. Less confident, less sure of where he fit into his surroundings. His demeanor was easier to get along with, less dominating and aggressive.
And he just wanted to move on from what he'd done to us.
It was startling to realise that for me I had already put it behind me. I wasn't sure when, but somewhere along the line I had let go of all the anger I felt for Hunter.
I had moved on. Started living my own dreams that no longer involved him.
And I laughed, astounded at my own feelings.
"I guess that's a no then." Hunter sighed, standing ready to leave.
I wiped my tears away and turned my insane laughter into a few manic hiccups. Stepping towards him, I held my hand out for him to shake.
"No, it's the realisation that I forgave you a long time ago." He took my hand in a daze and gave it a firm squeeze. "Good luck with those people who need you. And don't make the same mistake." Though I doubted he would. The way he cared for Daniel proved that.
His smile was wide. "Thanks Sam. And I never plan to. Second chances don't come around all that often and I'm going to seize mine. Do you think I should talk to-"
But then the very people Hunter was going to speak about walked through the door.
I waited as Tori and Jaxon rocked back on their heels, completely floored by the sight of Hunter. Jaxon was the first to recover.
"What the hell is he doing here?" he demanded.
"I rarely say this, but I agree with Jaxon. Sam, why the hell is he here?" Tori seconded Jaxon's opinion.
"And this is why I asked for you first," Hunter whispered to me.
"Guys, he's just here to talk," I reasoned with them.
"A leopard doesn't change its spots," Jaxon snapped. "And another thing-"
"Dada." A squeaky voice interrupted Jaxon.
Jaxon and Tori's eyes zeroed in on the stroller with minute precision.
Hunter kneeled down and unbuckled the unhappy child. "I'm here, baby boy. Daddy's here."
"DADDY!" Jaxon and Tori both exploded, looking between Hunter and Daniel before they both looked at me for an explanation.
And I shrugged. "Turns out some people can change."
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