I was kneeling in front of my grandma with continuous tears freely flowing from my eyes to the floor with everybody's eyes on me.
I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me.My mum vowed to curse me for the rest of my life.
Thinking about it,I think I'm cursed already from all indication.
I wept  bitterly as my grandma pleaded on my behalf for my mum's forgiveness because of something I didn't do.
I once mentioned that my mum can convince you of something you did not do until you start to believe that you did.
I was not running mad,I'm sure I didn't do it but I still have to agree that I did so my mum will not look like a liar.

Flash back
……………………………. …..

I was cooking in the kitchen when my mom walked in.
As usual,she shouted at me with all sorts of insults and accusations.

I was sure that our neighbors could hear her so I politely asked her to lower her voice and then boom!she exploded.

"You don't want me to shout because you don't want people to know the kind of person you are? you are a wicked girl sent to kill me,I gave you my breast milk for nine months but you disrespect me and talk to me anyhow you want.You are a very wicked girl."

The shouting was getting out of hand, so I asked her to excuse me so I can go out of the kitchen.

"You want to push me?push me!push me and pass so that everyone will know the kind of person you are….push me nowww just push me and see."

My mom kept shouting.

I was quiet all along until she slapped me.

I lost it there.

"What did I do? where have I wronged you?if you regret having me as a child,why don't you pray to God to take me away instead of provoking me all the time?"

I shouted back.

"You are talking back at me? are you mad?you will be disrespecting me under your Dad's nose  yet, he does nothing about it because you have blinded him with evil.Im talking and you want to beat me?beat me! beat me if I don't curse you today."

I watched her say those bad things but she wasn't satisfied until she pushed me to the wall. I mean she literally pushed me to the kitchen wall.

My heart was boiling.
My hands where shaking.
I was boiling with so much pain.

She slapped me for the second time when I asked her not to touch me again.

I was so furious but I knew she would slap my face again so I swiftly stopped her hand from landing on my face by holding her hand and that's where the drama began.

My mum started to scream at the top of her voice that I had slapped her.

I stood there imagining over and over again to know if I slapped her. I know I did not slap her.I would never intentionally do that to my mother.

So,the sound which came out after our hands collided is the slap?
I was only trying to save my face from scratches besides the one's I already have.
She was going to hit me with full force so if I had stopped her mid way,it will definitely give a sound just as it would if she slapped me.

I was devastated and exhausted already.
If I had known,I'd have let her beat me to a pulp.

My Dad called to ask me if I truly did it and I said Yes.
I had to say yes.
I wasn't ready to listen to her, accuse my Dad of supporting me all the time and how I'm the devil trying to destroy her family….. and the rest.

The way she said it,looked like I slapped her on the face.
She kept crying and repeatedly kept saying she would curse me.

The worst that could happen,is for me to run mad.
I was running mad already so it would not be bad to completely roam the streets in rags, talk to myself and eat rubbish .

My Dad swore to deal with me if I don't apologize.
I knelt on the floor, begged my mum to forgive me but she would not budge.

I got tired and ignored her.
I could not cry or laugh or even think.
Anything she says has to be right as long as she is happy so I played along with only my God,mum and I knowing what really happened.

Things got out of hand when my mum packed to her mothers house, saying she can no longer live with me.

I didn't need an Angel to tell me that,the word has been spread.Everyone knows that I'm a bad person.

A few days passed without a word from my mother until today.

My grandma called asking that I should come to her house.

End of flash back.

…………………………………………..

I was crying.
Everyone present was crying.
They felt sorry for me,they saw me as a bad child.

I wasn't weeping because I felt sorry, I didn't feel sorry.
I felt tired.
I was exhausted and drained emotionally.
I wasn't feeling anything.

I wept bitterly because I was going out of my mind.I am running mad.