Have you ever wondered why people get divorced?
The answer is crystal clear.
"They can not stay together any more."
But why?
There are many reasons and excuses as to why couples get divorced on a daily basis in different parts of the world.
It's either because one party is being abused,the other is cheating, lying,drunk, or someone has changed.
It is often said that "change is constant" but is it necessary, especially in terms of marital affairs?.
Physical change is inevitable but why the change in attitude, character, manner etc.
Are they tired of each other already?.

I lack words when ever I see youths running into marriages without clear vision, missions and goals.
Unlike a job that has retirement, marriage is a lifetime commitment from day one till death do you path.
So,why pledge to an oath you are not ready to submit to?.

Oh! all your friends are married and you are not? So what?
Is it not better to be single than to experience hell on earth?

In the quest for sexual satisfaction, material gain,fame,and  other wrong reasons, people have successfully gained themselves admission into marriage Disaster University.

Arguments, misunderstandings,anger, misconception, disagreements, quarrels,etc cannot be excapped but they can be controlled.
It's just like children and their parents who might not always aggry on everything until someone has to compromise and sacrifice at their own expense for peace to reign.

Marriage is not just about love.
It's a lifetime test of patience which doesn't go free without temptations.

How ready are you to love your partner regardless of the changes?
How ready is she to forgive even when the man cheats?
How ready is he to tolerate her when she has just two kids but would not stop nagging for dusk till down?.

I watched as my dad forcefully dragged my mum to the main entrance door.
"Get out of my house"
He fired at her.
"Leave my house woman! Just go away.
I can take care of my children without you."

I looked at him and mentally said…."it's a lie"
He cannot take care of us all by himself.
We have been staying with our mum most of our life time so what is he saying sef.

I and my siblings were standing there speechless.
This was not the first time we have witnessed them fight.
The problem is that it's becoming a normal thing for them every night.
I was very certain that our neighbors knew exactly what happened as the night was extremely quiet.

My mom on the other hand was not giving any signs of apologies.
This woman is so strong headed.
Why will she not apologize wether it is her fault or not?
That's not what worry's me ooo hmmm.
If someone opens mouth to talk now…hey she'll say that…."ehen shey I'm the only one that commits crime in this house,I'm the only offender constantly at fault.You people blame me for every bad thing that happens in this house. Tell your Dad his faults…tell him or is he an angel that you guys cannot point out his wrong doings? useless children."

She would not just stop talking and talking at the peak of her voice and that is exactly what my Dad dislikes.

"Children just go back to your rooms and sleep. Do not worry about us,we will be fine don't worry."

Ehn!! you say what.
Han this one that the two of them want to bring the whole house on us he's now saying we should not worry?
How? just tell me how.

I looked at them in utter disgust and irritation.
When it all started,I'd cry my eyes out,call a little family meeting or write letters to both of them,then hide it in their bags or notebooks and guess what!
It did the magic maybe because I was little then.

Right now, nothing was working.
I could not even cry.
I felt too bitter to weep at the moment.
I felt so tired of the flights and quarrels and all I wanted for them was the divorce.
Yes you heard me right.
I'd rather my parents get divorced than for them to kill each other without noticing that their children are emotionally dead.

Don't get me wrong.
I am not a perfect child either.
I've prayed countless times for God to fix my family but seems like the angel conveying my message forgot it somewhere in the house.

Nothing hurts a child more than to see their parents fight especially when the fights remain constant.
They fight about almost everything…..I don't understand why or some of the reasons they fight about.
I sometimes think that they fight with no reason but they know each other best so,who am I to interfere?

I remember those days when my parents were besties.
I admired them so much till I prayed for my marriage to be like theirs.
They played together,ate together,made silly jokes at each other,held hands on the streets,shared kisses in our presence while we pretended to be shy.Those days they stayed together in the sitting room till morning chatting about their childhood and youthful days.
They just belonged to each other then something happened.
Gone are those days.
It's not them anymore and I don't pray for my marriage to be like theirs.

After the hurtful exchange of words,my mum left to her parents house while threatening to come get all her things the next morning that's after my Dad gave her a divorce threat.

My Dad closed himself in their room while I and my siblings were staring at each other.
Sleep had deserted our eyes completely.

At this point,if anyone asked me what I wanted for my parents,my answer would be the Divorce but trust me, marriage has it's ups and downs but the right solution may not be the divorce especially when kids are involved.

The case is different when it's beating and maltreatment of any sort.
I'd root for divorce sharp sharp before somebody kills somebody joor…..I'm not saying that my Dad beats or maltreated my mum oo……sha I was there when he slapped her ones but never repeated it again.

Inasmuch as i wanted them to split,we the kids are the ones at the receiving end.
Truth be told, our mum is our dads support system.I mean his back bone.
While he is the head,she is the neck and all of us are a body.
Is there ever a head without a neck?
My mum has truly been the bone of his bones.
She has been there is his weakest, I've seen her pray in tears on her knees, I've seen her share in his joy and achievements,she stood to support him financially, emotionally,etc.
They make the perfect winning team now,we don't know exactly what's going on.
I guess this is what they mean by "for better for worst."
The peak of marriage.

As for me,I'm neither for or against anyone.
You know what they say,"what God has joined together,let no man put  asunder"
"This asunder thing no too clear like that oo but you know na,if you enter married people wahala,by the time they reunite,hmmmm they will shame you finish ehnn the thing will just backfire on your head."
I chose to let them be.
They know exactly how to fix this besides I don't know exactly what to do.

This is where I call Jesus to take the wheel.
"God hates divorce".
Learn to fix your marriage….no matter how bad,it was just the two of you in the beginning so, you can fix it and when it's not fixable….. well I can't say.

Couples should learn to apply the marriage grease oil often.
Do not let your marriage get rust until it cannot be greased.