NAAZ

Darkness! That, what caught my eyes as I opened it. It was surprising, maybe I wake up at midnight. I shook my head, nuzzling my face back into the pillow. It seemed rather hard. How come it turned hard, though I was used to my hard surface pillow prepared with used clothes, it was tougher, as if I was sleeping on a piece of rock. I rubbed my eyes, curiosity taking better of me.

Suddenly, a familiar scent filled my nostrils. It smelt of cardamom. Perplexed, I raised my eyes to glance at the source. I knew who the person was. How could I ever forget the fragrance? Ever? The light available in the room could only provide a small glimpse of the person. His slow breath reached my ears, as it was fanning on my face as I was staring straight at him.

"Hmm...." Heard him groan, as suddenly the grip of my waist tightened. At that minute, I realised he was holding me close. I was lying on his chest when I reached such a position? My eyes again glimpsing at his sleeping figure. He seemed so different from the one I witness during day hours. His dark black orbs closed; his lip lifted in a small smile. A content passing through his soul, his big straight nose, breathing harshly coming out in a rhythmic pattern. My hand was resting on his chest, I could feel his heart beating, loud! He seemed so relaxed at the minute, away from all the trouble. A man at peace! Only if I could offer him the same throughout his life. Only if I could offer him happiness!

A sad smile played on my lip; I was a reason behind his pain. I could never bring him happiness! I shook my head, attempting to get out of his strong grip. I couldn't let my feeling have control over myself, I needed to pull myself from him. I had no right to allow that feeling to grow inside me. I couldn't act selfishly; I knew I was cause for his destruction. My eyes darted back at his face, a smile spreading on my face. The genuine one! "Mainu maf kar dena..." Hand making its way towards his jaw, caressing it's slightly. It seemed rough under my soft skin. I hadn't touched him before and nor I was in such an intimate position with anyone before.

I should be feeling uncomfortable, but all I felt was safe, a feeling of content in my heart. The warmth radiating from his body was making me feel protected. The feeling I had when his lips... What am I thinking? I needed to stop, I darted my gaze away. Away from the face that could make me melt, the face could urge me to turn selfish. But I couldn't! I couldn't risk his life! I needed to walk away before, he woke from sleep. I again moved. The grip on me was hell tight, how could he manage to be so strong even in sleep?

I stare at him in disbelief, I couldn't even move his finger and was turning breathless with my effort. Who was he even? Losing the energy I had in my body, I closed my eyes again. At that minute, I realised I had nothing from the morning. Was I sleeping the enitre day? Wait! How come I reached his room? I moved my gaze to confirm if I was in his room or he had jumped into mine?

My doubt was right, I was sleeping in his bed. Darkness was the main indicator, he used to question me about my love for darkness but all I could analyse was he loved it far more. Even the pain of the wall was in black, followed by the blanket and sheet I was laying on. When I slept? Suddenly that thought crossed my mind, I moved my leg, expressing deep pain.

I moaned, "ahh..." the pain was still present.

"Are you fine?" Suddenly I heard that hoarse voice, it was much deeper due to him waking from sleep a minute back. I nodded not looking at him and cursing myself for waking him up. Making the complicated situation more difficult for me.

"I am asking you something..." he voiced, slowly lifting my chin. His dark orbs staring straight into my brown one. His thumb slowly drawing the pattern on my chin bone. Forcing me to glance at those orbs, which could make me weak. Which could break all the walk I built around my heart. My heart raising its pace, those black orbs were filled with concern. Concern! That it always held!

"Ha..." I shutter, his intense gaze was blocking any word from my tongue to roll out. He could make me all numb.

"Why are you awake?" He questioned, not letting his work on my cheek stop. Nor his eyes leaving me for once, as if those conveying many emotions his mouth couldn't roll out.

"Mai... Mai..." I had no valid answer, it was unknown why I was awake?

"Need food?" He answered for me, I gave it a thought. Yes! I was hungry, moreover, I could escape from his grip. I gave a nod, a sweet smile played on his lip. "I will bring you something," suddenly my face fell. He wasn't letting me leave, "don't move from the bed." His voice turned dangerous, a warning.

How could he shift from soft to dangerous in one mini-second? Was it even possible? "Am I clear," I could sense him standing from bed but his eyes were fixed on me.

"Ha..." the response again came in a shutter. He groaned, wasn't aware why? But I could sense my response pissed him. But what was he expecting a no? I couldn't say so, as it would have turned him more frustrated. I brushed the thought away, why to trouble already bothered brain of mine.

Wasting my time simply staring at his room and not thinking of opposing him I was peacefully laying on his soft mattress of his. I had witnessed the monster in him in the morning, it had scared me to hell. I wasn't intending to awaken him back, properly covering my face so no further consequence. I knew my actions would bother him, maybe I would spoil his mood but for me, it was better to spoil his mood than to push his life to danger, he won't ever understand me. He never did!

***

"Are you going to pull that sheet of you?" I could sense his frustration, as he had repeated those words various times.

"Mai nahi kar sakti..." I murmured.

"Kyu?" Karan was the one to speak, my tone was quiet and thought none would listen but Karan did. I kept quiet they knew the reason. I sensed Sidharth losing his patience, he brushed his hair in frustration.

"Shehnaaz tum kyu nahi samjhti yeh sab..." Lyra was going to repeat those words again. Why couldn't they understand, it was risky for them? I never wanted to join them on their trip to the pond, they were too persistent to listen to me. I could no longer argue with Sidharth and all though I had come along with them but had managed to conceal my face from them. I was doing it for them, for their well-being.

Seeing me getting nervous, as I was fixing my dupatta. "Hmm... why don't we leave the topic. She at least agreed to accompany us." Urging his friend to stop the discussion, I heard Lyra sighing while Sidharth narrowed his eyes at me. That dupatta too couldn't help me to escape from his intense gaze.

"Shehnaaz, why don't you show us your secret place?" Karan asked, grabbing my wrist and dragging me towards the mini forest we had in our village. If it was a few days back, I could behave in an abnormal way. Someone touching me wasn't something I was used to. I never had to hug anyone in my life, but then those people entered. Making me understand what life was? To experience emotions other than fear, sadness and regret. They made me believe in the beautiful side of life, what friendship meant. They made me feel wanted, not a piece of a curse.

I knew soon they would walk back to their city away from my life. I won't any longer see them but I wasn't greedy. I was satisfied with the moments they gifted me, I could survive with it. We were already walking on the dense part of the forest, trees on either side of us.

"Man! This is turning adventurers." Lyra commented from behind, "now I understood why Karan claimed of Shehnaaz been a chudail." Staying with them, I was trying to understand the foreign language. They mostly talk among them in it, and they called it English.

"Chudail?" I questioned looking at Karan for an answer. He provided me with a sleepish smile, after knowing Karan to some extent. His facial expression shouted 'I got caught'.

"Hmm... Actually..." he was out of words and that was a rare case, him not knowing what to utter?

I had an idea of him teasing Sidharth with something related to chudail but I never took interest in their conversation and mostly it was in their favourite foreign language. "Woh tumko chudail bulata tha..." with those words I was pulled by familiar long, warm hands. I could sense authority in the way he pulled me towards him away from Karan as if indirectly claiming to him something. "Kyuki mujhe tumhari awaz sunayi deti thi, tum nahi." I knew he was just behind me. I could feel his warm breath on my hair as he spoke along with his gaze but wasn't going to glance at him. He made me nervous, I could lose the small confidence I possessed when he was around me. Especially when he stood so close to me. He made me melt in his strong gaze.

"Shehnaaz, yr woh mazak tha, I mean... tum..." I heard Karan voice justifying himself. I pressed a smile, "tumhe buran ahi laga na?" He questioned, still a pang of guilt powering him.

"Nahi..." I shook my head. A smile spread on his too. "Chalo tumhe mera secret place dekhna tha na..."

"Ha..." Turning overexcited as always, Karan rushed towards the direction followed by Lyra. I was on the verge to follow them but was halted in the place with a strong grip on my wrist. And with a sudden push, I was turned and landed on his chest. It happened in such a blink of a second that before I could register in my mind, I was staring at the black orbs. Unlike before he wasn't fuming in anger but a smirk was playing on his lip.

He leaned forward causing my heart to beat even faster if it already wasn't beating. He inhaled my scent, standing a inches away from my face but my hair touched his skin. "I get what I desire..." His voice was soft, low yet with the way he claimed those words, with such determination that I shivered in his arms. Closing moving his face towards my forehead and pressed a kiss. It turned my skin to glow little and soon a pink shade pass my cheek, his smirk grew seeing his effect on me. I closed my eyes as his touch could make me feel the wonders of the world.

"Sidharth! Please not today, we need your Jhalli attention too..." came the annoyed voice of Karan.

"Her attention is reserved only for me." I could feel his gaze, he was melting me with such an intense one. "Let's move," he spoke moving his hand from my back and taking a step forward. I took a breath not knowing, I was holding it for so long.

Mai tera... Mai tera...

"So, you finally made her remove that sheet from her face." I heard Karan imitating Sidharth and at that minute I realised what his words meant.

"I get what I desire..." I moved my gaze to glance at him, my dupatta was placed on my shoulder. Maybe with the push, he turned me, the dupatta descended down. His face yelling at me, 'I had won the battle.' I shook my head. How could someone be so stubborn? So, determined? I knew at that minute, he won't ever take a defeat. Never!

****

Some moments to understand Sidharth and Shehnaaz characters better. And to understand why they react the way she does.

THANKS READING! AND LOVING THE BOOK SO MUCH...