NAAZ

Roaming around the garden, glancing at every flower. I was lost in the conversation we had a few hours back. The guy after me, the one urging me to stop thinking as a curse, had faced such events in his life. My heartfelt burden of being responsible for the pain he was receiving. The flashes of his room got before my eyes, the pieces of glass. Ashes of cigarettes spreading on the floor. The smell of alcohol mixed with the smoke of cigarettes surrounded the room. I couldn't imagine the one who spread smiles in my life was dealing with so much pain. He had a family, such a beautiful house, friends, yet he was so alone inside.

"Where are you lost?" Questioned Karan, waving his hand before me. I shook my head, faking a smile. "Sidharth ke baare mein soch rahi ho?" And glancing at him once, I diverted my gaze back at the flower. "You might be wondering that this Sidharth is so different from the one in the village. Kitne alag hai na dono?" He inquired, and I nodded in agreement. My eyes were fixed on plants in the garden.

"You know, ki kyu woh tumahare piche chala jata tha? Kyu usko ek zid thi, tumhari life badal ne ki... kyuki he had seen him in you. The label curse you dealt with, he was mentioned the same many times. Maine yeh uncle ke samne nahi bola, kyuki I don't blame him either but indirectly uncle too was responsible for making him believe he is inferior. I had witnessed those traits of him, those days when he curses himself. He is disgusted with himself, nafrat hai usse khud se... isliye woh khud se dur jana chahta hai... aur dur jane ki chah mein... nashe ki duniya mein lupt ho jata hai. Dar hai mujhe aur uske dad ko ki hum usko kahi kho na de... uski condition worse ho rahi hai wakt ke sath, aur hope bus tum ho humari." He wasn't even able to finish the words when the cook walked towards us in hurry.

"Karan beta, Ritesh sir bula rahe hai. Sid sab ki halat bigad rahi hai..." His eyes conveying anxiousness, I was frightened listening to it. I went numb but seeing Karan running, I rushed along with him. Was on the verge to step inside, but stopped myself. Peeping into the room, I got a glimpse of Sidharth. He was standing, moving his gaze to Karan.

"Can you ask him to leave?" Grabbing his head tight, "he is killing my nerves. He had removed my entire collection," pushing the cupboard with such a force that it landed on the floor. Luckily the cupboard was strong enough not to end into pieces.

"Sid, relax! You are not consuming any nutrients so I can't allow you to have alcohol either." His dad offered him a stern face, not going to give off.

"You are none, to disturb me! You have no right, over my life! Stop dominating me!" Voicing out fury, his eyes radiating the anger within.

"He is your dad, Sid! You can't act in such a manner with him." His mom opposed Sidharth's act but those words had the least effect, his eyes were searching for something more precious. "Are you listening to me?" Questioned Sumitra on seeing his son not listening to him.

"I NEED ALCOHOL..." Urging, his eyes landing on Karan.

"Sid, try to listen. It isn't healthy for you now..."

"You too gang up with them, how could you? I don't want to..." Pulled the vase from a nearby table throwing it in anger, but unfortunately, it landed on his mom's head. I was built with horror seeing the blood oozing, those black orbs containing fury a minute back soften a little listening to his mom's grasp but a second later, hearing his dad's yell it turn back dark.

"What the hell!" Ritesh moved towards his wife. Touching the forehead, "bring ice-pack..." He screamed, I rushed towards the kitchen, cook too followed me. As we reached, he handed me an ice pack from the refrigerator. My heart was feeling heavy, seeing the worsening condition of Sidharth. They were not lying when they spoke about losing Sidharth, he was turning dangerous and it scared me. It built fear of his future health issues.

"How much more time will it require?" Ritesh was screaming loudly, indicating the stress he was in after witnessing his wife bleeding.

I rushed out, handing him the pack. They had reached the living area. Ritesh got busy applying it to Sumitra, while she was attempting to speak something. "Why you locked him? We need to console him, not leave him devasted. He needs our help..." Sumitra was expressing her concern, glancing towards Sidharth's room direction. Karan was nowhere to be found, and her actions were scaring me. Lock? Did they lock him? Why?

"Not at the cost of others life. I had given him another chance, even knowing after him harming our one staff. He had repeated it once again, his anger is having full control over him and at such a crucial moment, he needs to be kept at a safe distance from others. I can't afford him to harm anyone... I was thinking about my decision and I think..."

"No! You can't take my son away from me. I didn't question your decision on shifting him to India, but I won't allow you on taking him to the rehabilitation centre. He needs our love, our care... why don't you understand?" Sumitra was crying before her husband, pleading for her son. I could glimpse helplessness in both of their parent's eyes, one was expressing it out loud while the other was masking it under his stern attire. For a moment, I felt her husband could interpret future outcomes while the wife was yet unknown about it.

"Sumitra! I don't want to listen to a word..." His one glare shut her mouth.

"Uncle, please give it a second thought." Karan descended from the stairs in rush, "he is banging the door. Locking him in a room will cause him more harm, he needs to be assisted with care." He was pleading with Ritesh but he had pulled on a resistance attire not allowing anyone's word to affect him.

"His condition had already worsened and only rehabilitation would work. Would warn everyone not to dare to open the room," ordering he walked out of the mansion. Rest were having a helpless look on their face, cook moved inside. I followed him not understanding, how to act? I had understood his dad was planning to shift him while the other two objected, his dad was a doctor who could understand the situation better yet my heart wanted him not to leave. At least if he would be in a mansion, I could be aware of his health but he being far off would stress me more.

Later that night, though I was lying on the floor sleep was far away. The day scenario was flashing against my mind. Not understanding whether I should act or be an observer? Not able to take it any longer, I stood from the floor. Making my way upstairs, I needed to glance at him once. He was locked in the room for the past few hours, none peeped inside. Karan and her mother were urging his dad but he wasn't convinced. None had anything today! The dining table was vacant, everything was so messed up.

I stood before the door, battling whether to disturb him or not? The order was given and if I went against it I would have to face the consequence, not giving to the fear. I opened the door, peeping into it. As expected, darkness was surrounding each corner of the room. Also, the smoke of cigarettes reaching my nostrils. I took a step forward, "walk away!" I heard a shout, resulting in my grip on the door to went loose and as a result, the door got shut. I gulped, as I was in the mid of darkness. Not that I hadn't landed in this place before, my entire life was spent in the darkness, with candles been the source of light. It was Sidharth who had transformed my life, he had made me used to brightness.

***

"Sid, man! I can't see a thing." I heard grumbles coming from outside of my hut. It sounded familiar; it was Karan. But what was he doing outside, and Sidharth too was along with him? These two surely would land me in trouble one day, shook my head turning to open the door.

"Ap log yaha kya kar rahe hai?" I questioned while carrying the candle along with me as it could help them with the way. Both the boys offered me sheepish smiles.

"Hum?" Stroking his hair in embarrassment, "surprise!" He was grinning like a kid causing me to smile at him.

"Ha, surprise..." Repeated Karan as if he too got to know about it at that moment.

"Kaisa surprise?" I was confused.

Sidharth gestured me to wait and handed me the bag in his hand. I offered him a questioning look, same was the condition of Karan. "Look it for yourself, I mean khud dekh lo." As he voiced it out, I opened the bag. Sidharth took the candle from my hand, helping me.

"Bulb?" Raising a brow at him, as I took one bulb from the rest five.

"Yes, bulb!" He kept the candle beside me and took the bulb from my hand, lighting it up. "Ab tumko andhre mein nahi rahna hoga, ujala hi ujala hoga tumahre idh- gidh." His eyes were shining in happiness as if that brightness was showering his life as well. It amazed me, how much he cared about each need. I glanced at my entire hut, never had it brighten so much. It felt as if I was celebrating Diwali today, as brightness had come into my life from the day he entered in. He was making me greedy; I no longer had the courage to push him away. He had offered me hope, I had never built the strength to dream.

***

"Mujhe apni Roshni dekar kyu khud us andhere mein ghum hogaye?" I questioned, as a slight tear escaped from my eyes.

"Jhalli..." I heard a slight whisper but soon silence engulfed me. I made my way towards the direction the voice had come but felt a deep pain near my feet as if something had pierced my skin.

"Ah!" I moaned as I touched the portion, I felt sticky liquid.

"Jhalli..." This time the voice got clear, a hint of worry radiating from it. And I heard a footstep moving towards me. Carrying a small source of light alone with him, it was spreading light to the entire room. As he moved closer, I could glimpse at the source. Fireflies in the bottle. A smile spread to my lip. He wasn't fully lost!

Ik tarfa shayad ho dil ka bharam

Do tarfa hai toh ye sanjog hai

"What happened?" His eyes moved towards my feet; the glass had pierced my skin. "How can you be so careless? Apna khayal nahi rakh sakti, kya?" Showering his anger at my lack of care. I was staring at him with delight, as he still cared! "Ab khadi kya ho, come..." He tried to drag me but I wasn't in a condition to move a step forward.

"Ah!" I screamed again in pain, "mere se nahi hoga." Trying to hide the pain from him, as he was already furious with me. He moved towards me with fierce eyes, I gulped in fear but soon bent carrying me in his arms. I was stunned by his acts, kept staring at his face. His hands strolled towards my waist, increasing my heartbeat.

The smell of alcohol reached my nostril, was he drinking? My hands clenching his shirt tightly due to his sudden act. His eyes landed on me at that moment, as my hand slightly brushed his bare chest. Black orbs were turning darker in the tiny light. Suddenly he leaned down. He slowly made me sat on the bed, searching for something in the drawers. My eyes weren't leaving, he seemed so strange. A minute he could go all mad but a second later, all soft.

Soon, kneeling he removed the glass piece. I again groan, his eyes conveying worry as he applied the cream. "Does it still pains...?" He asked, at that minute I realised he could glance at my face I covered it. Fearing it might bring him any more harm, suddenly his facial expression changed. He stood up, threw the first aid box on the bed. It passed from an inch away from me and moved away. Not speaking a word! But his frustration could be guessed from his actions. Was he bothered with my act of covering my face?

I moved my eyes around the room, as the fireflies were helping me with it. As I had gotten the hint, the room was covered with ashes of cigarettes. He was not allowed to drink but had replaced it with cigarettes, I shook my head. And as I glanced at him, he was busy having a drink. From where did he ended up with the bottle?

"Tumhe yeh kaha se mili?" I questioned him, gaining his attention from the bottle.

"Yeh," he extended it high. "Yeh kabhi mujhko akela nahi chodti... Yeh baki sab se alag hai..." It stabbed my heart as his painful gaze met with mine, he won't ever forgive me. Kissing the bottle in joy, "nahi! Karan bhi mujhko akela nahi chodta." He chuckled, expressing it. "I love you, Karan for this bottle."

_____

A.N: A GOOD NEWS, I HAD COMPLETED WRITING THE BOOK SO THE UPDATES WOULD BE FREQUENT, A COMPENSATION FOR MAKING YOU ALL WAIT FOR MONTHS AT TIMES FOR UPDATES.

RANDOM QUESTION...

FAVORITE PART OF THE SONG IN THE BOOK?

MINE IS THIS ONE!

Layi re zindagi ki kahani kaise mod or huve khud se paraaye kisi se naina jod ke...