Late Winter, Crocker Art Museum, Sacramento California Press Day.

Press day at the Crocker Art Museum was supposed to kick off my last month at my new job. The job was working for a recluse artist named Noah and working on three YouTube channels. His sister's YouTube channel, their friend, and the main channel ForNoah. On the main channel, all four of them were together and it was the channel that spawn all the other channels. It was mostly singing and showing off his art. But the YouTube channels were low-key popular.

They made enough money to do an alright side hustle and hire me to manage it. Getting the job to manage the YouTube accounts came at the right time for me. My marriage ended on a butt dial. I listen to my husband and his sidepiece having sex. It was an awful experience, and it cost me everything. It's funny how it cost me everything, but for him, it put him in a better financial position. I had to come up with the money to buy my fledgling business from him instead of splitting it in half. Missing out on any small amount of money we got from the sale of the house. Then still having to pay my ex-husband was painful. Moving in with Noah and working as his personal assistant was a life-saving event for me and my kids.

I thought I was fixing things for Noah. Small fixes like getting his mail, YouTube comments, editing, and little things. It made things easier for Noah as a personal assistant. After my broken marriage, I closed my eyes, and I was completely broken. When I open my eyes again, I found out I wasn't fixing Noah he was quietly fixing me. What was in front of me was the man I fell in love with. A man who, in his nearly 30 years of life, had never been in a relationship before me. He'd never been with a person intimately before me. I saw all my mistakes in my marriage when I fought with myself to stay with Noah. The time bomb of making expectations on him he might not have wanted. My bad habit of a picture-perfect settle-down lifestyle that I needed. It was a reflection of my childhood terror. Everything was wonderful until my dad got cancer and died, leaving us in debt. Moving from house to house rentals and other people's couches. I didn't want to repeat that life, but I also wanted the normal happiness everyone else wants.

Noah changed me and I didn't want to work for him anymore. I wanted him no matter how hard it hurt to find what was needed. I wanted him to figure it out, even if that meant not with me. Because I needed more than a casual relationship. I needed forever, and I didn't want to push that forever on to Noah. I wanted it to be something Noah wanted. I got two kids and responsibilities but I deserve...

I deserve.

Forever.

Making that decision ended our relationship because I was honest with myself. Half-full wasn't enough for me. No matter how good the sex was, I wanted more for myself. It had to end. For me and my kids, who adored Noah. I was going to tell him after I notified his sister, who hired me for the job. But Noah overheard and took his boat, then disappeared shortly after.

I broke something in him. His eyes locked on me and that fragment ocean blue gaze was on me when he overheard. Exposed were all the tattered pieces of his trust. I was his first. He was almost thirty years old, and I was his first everything. That responsibility I failed at utterly. But the art show had to go on and put it together as part of the contract. The event takes place later in the week without Noah. Most of his paintings have already sold except for the main set piece, which is going to be bid on at the show.

Noah asked me to name the piece. He made it on the night we were together for the first time. The piece reminds me so much of what he told my son on his boat. Combine with the night we were together for the first time. A storm of emotions. Noah said, "having Asperger's is like being a tiny sailing boat in a big stormy sea."

When he said it, we were on the ocean and the deep blue went on for miles beyond sight. The idea of it was incredibly lonely.

"Hurry mom we're almost there," my daughter Simir urges me on, pulling on my hand. Space Girl skips over all the space-inspired art sections to get to.

"Sim, we'll be there soon." Her brother moves through the museum ahead of us faster, but I keep him in sight.

"Ade, slow down!" I chase after the fast-moving legs of my son. Little Man raced out the glass double doors. We could see the tip of the boat's mast in the distance. A sailing ship we all knew. It was the sailing ship Noah was building the first time I met him.

The wind billowed the sail in the breeze as my son's head lifted to watch it. Riggers on the boat try to gain control of the sails as they bring them in. His paintings work in the background to act as the blue oceans. Hundreds of different shades of blue, so many that they blend together into the painting. A tiny boat in a great enormous sea. It was breathtaking as the night I saw him begin it. The first night we were together. The multi-panel painting was beyond huge to make a sailing ship look tiny.

" Eh ... Mrs. Tari Tyson, can you sign off for this?" One of the workers asks me to sign off on something. It's a little annoying because people put Mrs. on to everything. I'm not married anymore and back to my maiden name, Tyson, instead of Green. I went over to look at the thing he wanted me to see. It was too bad they didn't wear name tags.

It was my first time seeing the whole art piece fully put together. I forgot to breathe when I saw the name on the placard.

Noah Jude, Neptune 2022

Next to the painting was a picture I took of him. It was one of the few times he wasn't wearing a flannel shirt or a henley. His strikingly handsome simplicity could put models to shame. With his long sandy blonde hair and his ocean blue eyes as mysterious as any ocean can be. Noah was the God Neptune that I named him. He was stupid, good-looking, but he never seem to notice it about himself. When I would inform Noah of it, he looked at me with shock every time. Until when I told him I'd follow it would be a kiss simply to make sure he got I was serious. But even in the picture, you could see Noah's most important part that well of quiet kindness in him. My gaze lingered on that picture way too long.

"Noah turned in the name before he left," his art manager came from behind and told me. Even the kids were taken aback. They'd seen that boat thousands of times while he built it when we lived at Noah's and his sister's house. They walk together hand in hand in a daze around the ship behind. The first line but without crossing the yellow safety line near the ship. Space Girl's hand was tight around Little Man's hand, making sure he didn't runoff. He probably would love to climb the sailing boat like he always did when we lived at the house.

I hesitated to ask the pressing question. Noah's been missing since after Christmas and that's for weeks. I didn't want to ask because it was my fault he was gone, but I had to know. "Do you think Noah will be back before...?"

I didn't finish the thought of him coming back before the show starts might have been a little too much to hope for. She hands me a package for the event. Written on the box, it says One Night Only in California event. I tuck the box under my arm.

"We will see." She lets the words hang as ominous as ever. Most of the paintings already have met well over the minimum bid set up by his manager. The main piece of the sailing ship art installation is set for bid on the night of. The proceedings go to charities to help disabled and disadvantaged children. The help with reading and arts isn't always well funded. It's a program that was set up by his late Art teacher.

So, all of us are stuck waiting to see if Neptune will return from the Sea.

A/n: We back! The thirst trap is here yall. This is some really tight edits. I pretty much have been working on this editing-wise since yesterday. That's why the post on this is going to be slow-normal pace. Unless in a sex scene where I will probably do a post until the end of the scene. I hope you guys don't mind me putting this book in with the last one I just wanted to make sure everyone got it. 

Just a stupid side note, I'm such a Noah stan that I'm over here at 10:49pm Friday waiting to post it at 12:00am sat. Just counting that shit down lol. Too damn thirsty.