( Trigger Warning: This chapter involves self-harm, depression, and suicidal thoughts. pls skip if any of these things bother or scare you.)

My hands slightly shook as I approached Nemeko's bedroom door.

I-i have to know.

Where was he all these years.

Why won't he talk?

What's his history with Mariya?

I reach up to knock but stop when I hear sounds coming from the other side of the door.

Leaning in slightly, I put my ear to the door.

I struggle to hear exactly what it was but it sort've sounds like . . .

C R Y I N G ?

I let out a breath before opening the door quietly.

Stepping into the dark room I glance around looking for the source.

The only light source being the moonlight shining in through the wall window, giving everything an eerie glow and silouette.

My eyes continue to search before falling on a figure curled up in the corner.

"N-nemeko?" I say shakily, unsure if it's him.

I see the figure flinch and the sobbing stops.

I cautiously walk towards him.

The closer I get the more visible he becomes, until I can completely see him.

And what I see shatters my heart.

( TRIGGER INCOMING)

Nemeko has his head in his arms with his legs pulled to his chest, shaking slightly.

My eyes land on his arms and they widen in shock.

His forearms are covered in deep cuts that are leaking blood.

I glance at the floor and see a bloodied knife laying on the ground, shining in the moonlight.

Suddenly, Nemeko lifts his head and traps me in his sad and broken gaze, Both of his eyes are uncovered.

His eyes are filled with so many emotions, but the emotion that over powers it all is . . .

Pain.

My heart aches to see him so vunerable and hurt.

Without thinking I hug him, tears spilling down my own cheeks.

He tenses and I start to regret my decision, until he returns the hug.

He squeezes me tightly like I could disappear at any moment.

I just hold him tighter wanting to stop his pain.

His cries are muffled in my shirt as I rub his back soothingly, trying to clam him.

After a small while, he stops crying and just starts sniffling I start to slowly stand, not letting him go.

"Come on, let's get you clean up." I say softly, guiding him towards the bathroom.

I turn on the light and almost scream.

In the bathtub lays a stabbed to death Mariya.

her eyes wide open and her lips slightly parted as a small river of blood runs out.

I snap out of my trance when Nemeko starts to shake again.

Glancing at him I see his eyes starting to well with tears as he stares at her dead body.

I step into his line of vision.

"H-hey, I-it's okay. C-come on." my voice involentarily shakes as I guide him back to his bedroom.

After sitting him down on his bed I return to the bathroom to grab the medical kit and a wash cloth.

Giving Mariya's dead body a single glance of pity before turning off the light and leaving.

I go to Nemeko's side to place down the stuff before looking at him.

His face is completely empty as he stares forward.

I gently grab his arm to treat it and he quickly snatches it away.

"I'it's okay. I'm gonna clean your wounds." I say gently.

He slowly puts his arm out for me, looking me straight in my eyes with confusion.

I give him a soft reassuring smile before opening the first aid kit and getting started.

when I finally finish wrapping the bandages I give both of his forearms gentle kisses.

He stares at me with pure shock.

I give him a small smile before grabbing all the supplies and going towards the bathroom.

I quickly put away the things so I won't have to look at Mariya's dead body.

Re-entering the bedroom I see Nemeko now dressed in a black long sleeved shirt with black pajama pants, Laying down.

I come and sit on the bed looking down at him with worried eyes.

" Do you wanna...talk?" I ask softly.

He looks up at me before moving over and patting the bed.

I lay down facing him waiting while he stares at me.

the suddenly. . .

" I...I-i... R-rem-member...T-them All." he says in a broken raspy voice.

my eyes widen slightly.

" remember who?" I ask.

"T-the targets." he says his voice less raspy now.

I gulp.

"I-is that all?" I ask listening.

He lowers his gaze and shakes his head.

I wait for him to go on.

" I'm broken. I was used like a weapon for so long that I forgot what it was like to be... normal. They tourtered me when ever I disobeyed or failed.

 I lost my emotions when I was 10 because of... G-grant and what he did to me. Now all I'm good for is killing. Like Grant always said I don't deserve to be alive and I will never find someone to love a monster like me.

 I was so stupid to even think I could save you from this mess back then I was too weak. I still am too weak. I can't even not try to cut myself. I'm just a pathetic shell of the boy I used to be. So why live if no one needs me or wants me?" he confesses with an empty sorrowful voice.

My body moves on it's own and I place a soft comforting kiss on his lips.

" I need you and I want you. It doesn't matter what Grant says or what happened in the past. You will always matter and you deserve to be here.

 people can say different but forget them because they're will always be critics you just need to be strong enough to ignore them because they're are people who love you and you are anything but weak and pathetic! I know this because I love you nemeko. with all of my heart! 

and I won't let you hurt or put yourself down or think you alone and unlovable anymore because I'll be here to love you." I say boldly, looking him in the eyes.

His eyes shine with happiness as he pulls me closer to him.

"Thank you Y/n and . . . I-i T-think I L-love you too. N-no! I-i Know I love you!" he says passionately.

We lay there cuddling while Nemeko calls a guard to take care of Mariya's dead body.

After he ends the call my eyes start getting heavy.

"H-hey Y/n?" Nemeko says cathing my attention.

I snuggle closer to him.

"yeah?" I ask drowsily.

" Did you really mean that?" He asks.

" Mean what?" I ask yawning.

"T-that you love m-me?" he asks nervously.

"Yup!" I say falling asleep.

" Even though I'm a assassain?" he asks.

" With all my heart." I say  smiling contently.

"Okay, Goodnight."He says softly.

"Night." I say relaxing.

"love you." he says adorably.

" Goodnight! I love you too!" I say chuckling.

He smiles before pulling me closer.

We both fall asleep in each others arms.

And I finally know The Truth

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Hey nuggets!

I'm back!

sorry if this was depressing or whatever but this will all make sense soon.

Still loving you nuggets,

Writer_chan101

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