Kim Taehyung was a blink away from stopping Yoongi run away from him that night. All he had to do was move. He could've held out his hand and forced him back. He could've ran just like Yoongi did; could've ran to Yoongi and could've caught him. But he didn't. He sat there and let him run away. Because that's what should've happened. Taehyung shouldn't have just kissed Yoongi like that. He knows that now. He knows he did wrong.

  He even eventually dried off and went upstairs to knock on Yoongi's bedroom door, which seemed cold from the outside despite the tingling heat in the lodge. He knocked and he asked for forgiveness for doing what he did, but he merely received a muffled "go away" as an answer. Can't say he didn't try.

  Over and over again.

  Eventually, Yoongi yelled. At Tae.

  He yelled at Taehyung to go away. And there it was again. That feeling sinking deep into Taehyung's chest, swallowing his insides and spitting them out on what felt like concrete. Taehyung had messed up once again. Yoongi told him to leave and he didn't. He wanted to apologize but he ended up ruining everything even more than he did to begin with.

  He doesn't want Yoongi to hate him.

  All of the thoughts he had earlier about taking walks with Yoongi and taking photos of him were all shattered now. Was there even a way to put the pieces back together? Would Yoongi even let him do that? He fucking kissed him without permission for fuck's sake. He knows Yoongi would hate that.

  Why would he do that?

  Because he felt like it? That's a terrible excuse. Because he felt like Yoongi wanted it to? Did he not, though? Yoongi kissed back. Yoongi pushed him back and trapped Taehyung between his legs. Yoongi was diving deeper. Yoongi wanted it, right? So then why did he run away from him? Maybe Taehyung wasn't what he wanted. Maybe Yoongi has a significant other that Taehyung didn't know about and he was just caught up with him.

  But the burning sensation tickling at his chest was what was driving Taehyung insane. The greed that took over his body in that moment left him throwing away all of his pining and throwing away any thoughts in the moment, and he just kissed Yoongi like he was gulping down water on a hot summer day. There was no more time to think. He didn't want to. He had been craving to taste Yoongi's lips for days now, despite only knowing him for about a week. It's what he wanted and it had been a long five days spending time with Yoongi.

  But thats it. Those five days.

  Taehyung ruined it.

  Taehyung got what he wanted. At what cost? Yoongi is sitting in his room, ignoring him now. All because of want. All because Taehyung couldn't keep his impatient hands away from something that wasn't his. Selfish is what he is. And he knows that now, but what good is realizing something after the fact that he had already ruined it all?

  All those early morning breakfasts and cooking dinner together. All the deep conversations and even misunderstandings. Playing board games together and drinking the night away. Piano in the evening and dancing to the melody that Yoongi would play so beautifully. The longing to love himself and the way he thought he had finally gotten ahold of doing that— it was all thrown away. He would have to force himself to forget it all, really.

  It's not like he loves Yoongi.

  The desire to have Yoongi in his hands right about now to hug him and beg for forgiveness is screaming something different to him, though. Why would he be so angry at himself right now? Is it because of himself or because of Yoongi? Does he feel sorry for himself or sorry because he had crossed boundaries that made Yoongi uncomfortable?

  He can't get the look in Yoongi's eyes out of his head. Taehyung remembers seeing how scared Yoongi suddenly looked and he remembered pressing his lips ever so softly against Yoongi's, hoping it would calm him down. It apparently did the exact opposite.

  Taehyung wanted so badly to reach out to him and apologize a million times for ever kissing him like that. He was so annoyed with himself that he just bunched up against his knees into his bed and hugged tighter onto the white pillow, hoping it could save him from this nightmare. There was a limit. Limits aren't meant to be taken advantage of.

  He had what he wanted.

  Yoongi made his vacation good while it lasted. And Taehyung just ripped it away from himself. It pissed himself off as well.

  What an idiot. Absolutely foolish.

  What in the actual hell made Taehyung think that what he did was okay at any cost?

  He smacked the pillow, which he felt like could rip in half if he held into it any tighter. He wanted to smother his face in it and scream as loud as any ear could hear, but he knew that Yoongi was merely in the other room.

  It's all his fault.

  Its all Taehyung's fault and he doesn't even know what he's supposed to do now.

-

  When Taehyung woke up the next day, his alarm was blaring in his ear and his head was already pounding. He had fallen asleep with his head killing him the same way and it obviously wasn't going away with the amount of stress on him right now. He quickly turned off his alarm, almost beating his phone with his thumb as he did so. The sun was already shining through and Taehyung remembered why he even set that alarm in the first place.

  It's his last day here.

  He slid the blankets off of his half undressed body, shivering at the coldness that suddenly hit him. He dipped his toes off of the bed as if he was testing the ocean water. When his feet hit the cold floor, he sighed and sat up on the edge of the bed. In all honesty, he didn't even want to get up and go outside of his room. He also didn't want to go back home.

  His head was spinning with the amount of pounding coming from his own body. Nothing about this morning felt right. Not like all of the other days where he would wake up in a better mood, ready to cook breakfast with Yoongi.

Now, Taehyung just stares at the dark floor and frowns as he remembers everything from last night. It made his head hurt even more and all he could do was rub his eyes harshly, making more pain in his eyes instead of pain in his head. Another type of pain to think about besides the pain in his head. It only worked for a few seconds as he took his hands away from his eyes and sighed at himself.

  He felt like an idiot for playing himself last night. It felt like he had finally found the place where the grass is greener, but instead of keeping the grass clean and pretty, he killed it. He stomped on it and spit on it and just left it there to die. Taehyung ruined it all.

  And it felt like Yoongi just sat back and watched it happen. Like Yoongi had given him a taste of something good, but then it turned into poison. Taehyung still didn't understand why Yoongi kissed back but then left him. It made no sense to him. From his point of view, he did wrong. But he knows it wasn't just him. Yoongi fucking kissed back. He didn't force him to. He didn't pull him back, either.

  "Min-Fucking-Yoongi." Taehyung whispered to himself. "You make me go crazy."

  He finally made his way up and out of bed to put on clothes, almost fully ready for the day. He packed all of his clothes and got ready to leave the lodge later. After he washed his face and brushed his teeth, he decided to try and knock on Yoongi's door once again.

  "I'm.." Taehyung cleared his throat once he realized how small his voice sounded. "I'm going cook breakfast." He said louder.

  No response.

  A sigh left his mouth after standing there for a second. There was nothing to do now. Nothing except for cooking on his own. Nothing except for worrying that he may never see Yoongi ever again after they leave today. He wanted so badly to not let that happen. Taehyung had gotten too attached to Yoongi by now.

  Yoongi's gummy smile. The way Yoongi's hands press so softly against the piano. The way his voice sounds in the morning, the evening, at night— and when Taehyung had slept next to him, he wished he could've held him at least once. It sounds weird, but Taehyung really thought about that. He seriously thought about Yoongi and how much he'd miss the small things about him.

  He doesn't want this to be their last time seeing each other, he decided. If he doesn't beg for forgiveness now, he wont forgive himself.

  After he took a few bites of cereal, he quickly went straight back to quiet Yoongi's room.

  "Yoongi." Taehyung knocked softly on the door and hoped that Yoongi would open his door and at least look him in the eye. There was no noise for a moment. "Hyung." He knocked harder, but the door snapped out of its place and it barely opened.

  The door opening surprised Taehyung at first. But then it opened more. And Taehyung's eyes went wide with confusion and sadness, his heart sinking once he saw that there was nothing in sight. No Yoongi. No suitcases— not in the corner of the room like usual.

  Yoongi wasn't even there.

  Yoongi left.

  Taehyung's fists balled up tightly as he tried to hold back tears. He fucking left. Min Yoongi packed his clothes and items and he fucking left Taehyung. On purpose. He left him.

  "Y-Yoongi?" He opened the door more and bit his bottom lip at the sight of a neatly made bed. Maybe it was the wrong room. Taehyung nodded his head and inhaled sharply as he tried to walk calmly to the other bedroom in the lodge. He opened the door.

  "Hyung.." He furrowed his eyebrows at the unfamiliar room. There was no Yoongi. He set himself up again. He could suddenly hear a piano being played in his mind. His mind reminded him of every single moment he had with Yoongi. Never again. He will see Min Yoongi never again. That's okay. Okay.

  Taehyung doesn't need Yoongi.

  He's a stranger. "He's a stranger," Taehyung tells himself this as his heart feels like it clenches all on its own. Yoongi is a stranger. A stranger who made Taehyung laugh like a child. A stranger who taught him how to cook— and was patient with him. A stranger who trusted Taehyung. A stranger who listened to Taehyung and was adorable with a hint of mystery to him. A stranger who saved Taehyung from being a miserable human.

  A stranger, nonetheless.

  A stranger who left Taehyung.

  His hand that fit so well in Taehyung's. Yoongi's cute little nose and the crinkles at his eyes when he smiles. The soft look in his eyes every time he'd listen to him. The softness while playing piano. The secrets and "no judging" pact they had. Fuck.

  Taehyung doesn't want to let it go.

  But he's just a fucking stranger.

  Why is he so dramatic? Yoongi obviously didn't care as much as Taehyung did. Maybe Taehyung shouldn't care. He shouldn't.

  He really just... shouldn't.

-

Taehyung ended up spending the whole morning at the piano that held short lived memories with that certain stranger. The stranger who left him here alone to wait until time to go to the airport— and as Taehyung thinks about the airport, his mind drifts off and swirls with anxiety as he realizes that the certain stranger will be on the same plane.. right?

There's no way he could've found a sudden flight back home. There's no way he would actually pay for his own plane ticket to leave America just because of Taehyung. If he did, that would honestly drive Taehyung crazy. To know that the certain stranger would go off and buy a plane ticket and basically wave it in his face, saying "Catch me if you can, Taehyungie."

Taehyung cringed as his fingers hit the wrong piano keys, sending shivers down his spine. He was trying to play the song that the stranger was playing. First Love, he called it. Taehyung was no musical genius or anything, but First Love sounded like an absolutely beautiful song. Something with true emotion and meaning. Something that made Taehyung feel what the writer of the song was feeling. The stranger.

He stopped himself from pressing the next set of keys and sighed as he took his phone off of the top of the piano. It was all driving him wild, the way he had no phone calls or texts from the man. What if Yoongi really was just his imagination? What if this whole trip wasn't even real? Maybe he was dreaming and he would wake up to Jimin trying his damndest to try and cuddle him early in the morning.

  He knows its no dream, though. It sure did feel like one. Like he was in Utopia.

  Obviously his trip started out like shit. That was because he was an asshole to the poor stranger from the airplane. An asshole to the cute little thing who was wearing all black, clashing with his milky skin. An asshole to the point where he upset the poor little one who just wanted to be treated right. But when he wasn't an asshole, he felt less alone. He felt like laughing. Felt like talking. Felt like he wanted to spend the rest of his life in the lodge. Felt the need to hold the little stranger's hand.

  Felt the need to kiss him.

  Taehyung groaned as he held tighter onto his phone. Six-Thirty PM. That was the set time for his plane to leave. Four Thirty-Eight. That's what time it currently was for Taehyung. He figured that since he was already all packed up and had his luggage next to the front door, maybe he could just go ahead and leave for the airport. He could shop around the shops there and take his mind off of things.

  That didn't exactly work, though.

  When he got to the airport, all he could think of was the slight chance that he could potentially run into the certain stranger that he had been so worried about. The stranger who may or may not have just been all a part of Taehyung's imagination. The stranger who Taehyung may only see in his memories.

  He wants them to drift away, his memories.

  He wants them to just wither away and never come back. He's an absolute idiot.

  No matter how much Taehyung wished that he could just erase his mind by staring at the back of the airplane seat in front of him now, a familiar figure popped up in the corner of his eye, making him look up. His hopes were up. Everything turned to gray. No matter how much he wanted to scream with joy, his whole body froze. His eyes stayed on a certain pair of eyes that suddenly looked back at him.

  It's the stranger.

  It's Yoongi. Min Yoongi. In his own human flesh. His eyes tearing away from Taehyung's, sitting in his own seat which was a few seats ahead of Taehyung's, just like where they first sat on the way to America. Except this time they knew each other. This time, Taehyung isn't an asshole who just ran into the stranger on the plane. This is all real. Yoongi. It wasn't a part of Taehyung's imagination.

  And God, did the poor man want to say something. How badly Taehyung wanted to stand up and get on his knees in front of the man and beg for him not to hate him for what he did. And fuck, Taehyung shouldn't have let this get to him so much, but Yoongi wasn't even barely phased by it. He's just ignoring the tension on the little airplane. How?

  How could he just ignore the obvious? How did they spend hours on a plane without speaking at all? Taehyung felt like he had burned a hole in the back of Yoongi's head by the end of their flight. Of course he felt stupid for hoping once again. This is no love story. Taehyung isn't a prince on a white horse.

  Yoongi is just another memory. Another one for the books. He will never see him again.

  But Taehyung doesn't want that.

  God. Fuck, he doesn't want that.

  "Hyung," He called out to the shorter man who was quickly trying to make his way to find his luggage. They arrived back home, but Taehyung didn't care about that. He would cut his hair and change his attitude and change even his name if it meant that Yoongi would talk to him again. Yoongi didn't even look back at him. "Hyung." Taehyung said a little louder, approaching Yoongi for once.

  Finally taking action.

  "What, Taehyung?" Yoongi furrowed his eyebrows as Taehyung came up beside him. The harshness in Yoongi's voice made Taehyung cringe. It was something he'd not really heard. Yoongi was impatiently waiting for his luggage to come as Taehyung tried to make eye contact with him.

  Trapped. Yoongi was trapped.

  Taehyung saw his own suitcase and he pulled it off of the conveyor belt, leaving it to sit next to his side. "All I want to do is apologize." Taehyung frowned as Yoongi stepped forward, obviously seeing his own suitcase. Taehyung quickly stepped behind Yoongi and wrapped his arms around his neck, not wanting to let go.

  "Please don't be mad at me." He said. Yoongi's skin was soft against his, but he could feel his whole body burning. It didn't matter how much he apologized and hugged Yoongi. He knew this feeling. Yoongi didn't want to accept his apology. He could tell.

  Yoongi tried to pry Taehyung's fingers off of himself. "Just drop it, Taehyung." He tried, but Taehyung didn't like the answer he got from him. Yoongi ended up reaching for his own luggage and sighing at Taehyung, who was still holding. "Let go of me. I'm going home."

  Tae suddenly wanted to cry.

  "But—"

  "Ah, who the hell is this?"

  Taehyung was suddenly being actually pulled off of Yoongi by someone else. Yoongi turned around in shock, along with Taehyung. There was a man slightly taller than Yoongi who was trying his best not to eye Taehyung. Taehyung immediately froze in his place at the sight.

  Who..?

  "Seok, it's fine." Yoongi rolled his suitcase near the 'Seok' guy and took one more last glance at Taehyung. "Carry this. I'm tired."

  "Yes, sir." Seok suddenly had a wide smile and little dimples right above his lips as he looked up at Taehyung. "Nice to meet you—"

  "Let's go, Hoseok." Yoongi cut him off.

  Taehyung could only stand there like a statue as he watched Yoongi grab Hoseok's hand and start pulling him. Hoseok looked a little confused, but waved at Taehyung anyways. He could feel his whole body go numb as he watched the two walk away from him. That's all he could do. Watch him slip away.

  "Nice to... meet you, too"

~

IMPORTANT

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if my account gets hacked or whatever and this is my last update, im truly sorry. hopefully this is fixed bc i will literally cry if not 😭😭

if you're not sure what im talking about, here's what was said in wattpad's tweet:

basically everyone logged into wattpad is at risk of having their personal information being sold right now (emails and everything linked to your email,,, especially if you're signed in with another social media, like facebook). lots of people are being hacked. i believe wattpad isnt the only app that it's happened to, but wattpad has let it go on for a while now.

hopefully they fix this.

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